Chapter Five

A scream tore through the air so suddenly, so hard, that my ears temporarily started to ring as a response. I opened my mouth, flexing my jaw and wiggling my pinkie finger in my ear to alleviate the pressure, but it didn't do much.

I looked up as Polly leaned over the side of her bed and vomited.

Bits and pieces of furniture came up mixed with blood and whatever the hell she ate for lunch. I sighed, turning to look through the two-way where Kali was seated, enjoying a foot-long sub sandwich I'd bought her.

"Why did you guys let her eat the furniture?" I asked. Polly snarled, baring her fangs and lunging off the bed for me, her red eyes flashing. She leapt onto my back and I cursed, reaching up to try and throw her off my shoulders, but like the spider monkey she was, she held on fast and was trying to wrestle me into a headlock.

"We didn't let her eat anything," Kali's response said over the intercom as I managed to pry Polly off my back, flinging her across the room onto her bed, "She just eats what she wants, and she wanted her dresser apparently." I looked over at the dresser to see that the bottom corner had been chewed to hell. I sighed, then turned to Polly, who was scrambling off her bed to come after me again.

She snarled and slashed at me, but I sidestepped her and caught her around the waist when she stumbled past me. I slung her once more onto her bed where she bounced and leapt right off to come after me again.

"She's getting more aggressive," Kali noted over the intercom, "I think we need to start updating Mother on her condition... We may need to euthanize her." I pretended I didn't hear her as I caught Polly against me one more time, hoisting her off her feet.

I absolutely was not going to contact mother regarding Polly, because I knew she was going to euthanize Polly. She was unstable, uncontrollable, and she was beginning to grow hatred for Mother and that alone was a death sentence around these parts.

But mother was looking for proper soldiers, worker bees without a conscience.

I didn't really give a shit, because the day mother placed that tiny baby in my arms and those little fingers wrapped around mine, those red eyes gazing up at me with an innocence I'd never seen before... I was sold.

Mother may not want Polly.

But I did.

Polly released another horrifying scream as she thrashed in my arms, kicking and screaming, throwing her head back against my face and busting my nose. I tightened my grip on her as blood poured from my nose, soaking the shoulder of her shirt as I tried to contain her.

"Die," Polly screeched, sinking her claws into my arm and slicing through my skin with ease, "I hope you fuckin' die! All of you! Rot in the depths of Tartarus, you fucking cumslut!" I heard Kali choke on a laugh over the intercom, not that I found Polly's rant particularly funny considering she was speaking in that eerie demonic voice that wasn't hers.

Polly's voice was naturally rough, but somehow sweet. It was a dichotomy I found amusing.

"Let me go, let me go, let me go," Polly wailed now, and I watched in relief as her claws began to retract back to fingernails, "Let me goooo! I don't wanna be here! I wanna go to my bed! I wanna go to my room! I just wanna go home!" I grimaced as her wail turned into helpless sobbing as she thrashed more weakly in my arms.

I carried her back to her bed, gently placing her down as she sobbed, gathering the blankets to hide her face. She rolled over onto her side and just wailed against the pillow, tears soaking the satin beneath her head. I frowned, glancing towards the two-way, but Kali wasn't saying anything.

I had a feeling her heart was breaking too.

I knelt down beside the bed so I could look into Polly's teary face, her red eyes flashing gold briefly, then back to normal. I reached up to brush her short white hair out of her face.

"Polly?"

"Stop calling me that," she whimpered and sniffled, "I'm not small, I'm not tiny."

"You're very tiny, though."

"Fuck you." I couldn't help laughing at that and that seemed to ease her tears as she sniffled some more, snot and tears soaking her pillow. I sighed, touching the wet spot to clean it with magic before I conjured a Kleenex and held it to her nose.

"Blow," I commanded. She blew weakly for a moment, then blew harder. I caught the ick in the Kleenex and incinerated it in the palm of my hand. In its place was a small brown bag and Polly stared at it, confused.

"Wassat?" She mumbled.

"A present," I said, and Polly's eyes flashed wide open at that and she went to prop herself up, then hissed in pain and sank back down, "Hey, no, you don't need to move. It's a present you can keep with you all the time." I opened the bag and withdrew the necklace I'd bought from the vendor.

A thin gold chain with a beautiful drop of labradorite perfectly carved into a tear-shape and trimmed in gold.

"That's so pretty," Polly whispered in awe as I gently placed the necklace in her trembling palm, "But mother says no jewelry."

"I didn't buy it for Mother," I drawled, making her peek at me sheepishly, "I bought it for my Polly Pocket." Polly flushed and pressed the side of her face against the pillow, cradling the necklace in her hands.

"It won't matter," she murmured, making me frown and cock my head to study her, "I probably won't survive the rest of the week." I tensed at that. My instinct was to get angry, and I could feel the Beast in me ripple under my skin, but I didn't dare let Polly see that side of me.

"You will," I said, making Polly look at me doubtfully and I tapped the necklace in her palm, "That isn't just a regular necklace, Pol."

"It's not?"

"No, it's a good luck charm," I said, making Polly scowl at me curiously, "It'll protect you and keep you safe, both inside and out." Polly stared at me, then down at the necklace, then back up at me again.

"Will it save me?" She whispered. I nodded.

"I'll make sure of that, you just need this to keep you safe until I can bring you somewhere safer," I said, and Polly smiled, albeit a bit sadly, as she stroked the necklace, "Remember what I promised you? You'll have your own room soon, Pol. Your own bed. You won't be locked up in this hellhole for long. And if you ever need me to come here, you know to tell Kali, got it?"

"Uh huh."

"You'll tell me if you need me, okay?"

"Uh huh."

"No, I gotta hear a verbal confirmation," I said matter-of-factly and Polly laughed a little, pausing to sniffle and I raised an eyebrow, conjuring another Kleenex, which she took from me this time. She blew daintily into the Kleenex before looking at me.

"Yes, Jasper."

"Good. Are you good, or do I gotta give you another spanking?"

"Ugh, you're so annoying," Polly groaned, rolling over to hide her face in the pillow. I grinned.

"Am I even doing my job right if I'm not annoying?" I asked. Polly grunted as a response. I smiled, relieved she seemed calm and normal now. I rose to my feet as Polly rolled back onto her back, holding the necklace up to stare at it.

"Can I really keep this?" Polly asked as I cleaned up the damage to her room.

"I told you, it was a present for you."

"But it's so pretty."

"I know, that's why I bought it for you."

"I don't get it."

"Yeah, I didn't either," I murmured, making Polly glance at me curiously, "Presents are something you give someone that you love very much." I tried not to flinch at the memory of receiving my first gift, that beautiful handmade ring on my finger, and that second gift that sat right behind my ear and I touched it thoughtfully, feeling my chest ache.

"Do you love me very much?" Polly asked.

I smiled.

"Of course, Polly, you're my little sister."

"Mother says I'm not allowed to call you my brother," Polly murmured, making me glance at her, "She says I haven't earned it yet."

"You don't need mother's approval to call me your brother, or to be my sister, Pol. Besides, I don't see her around here anywhere, do you?" I looked around and Polly flushed.

"No, but," she paused, glancing at the cameras in the room, then at the two-way mirror before looking at me, "She's always watching." I looked at Polly, giving her hair a little ruffle that made her groan.

"And so am I," I replied, making her scowl at my play, "Now settle down and get some sleep. I'll see about having some dinner sent down here to you, okay? And do me a favor, please stop eating the furniture. You can get splinters from the wood."

"Tell that to whatever the fuck is inside me," Polly grumbled, still staring up at the necklace longingly, "I think I'm going to get indigestion from the paint on the dresser."

"You're lucky lead poisoning is a thing of the past, otherwise we might have a bigger problem than indigestion." Polly snorted at that, gave me a cheeky smile, then rolled over to take her nap. I smiled, turning out the lights before I left and headed back around to the other side of the two-way.

Kali was in the office, her elbows planted on the table, her sandwich only half eaten. She was frowning at Polly, who was only illuminated by the soft glow of her nightlight.

"If mother sees her with that, she's going to pitch a fit," Kali said under her breath as I came over and sat in the desk chair beside her.

"Then mother can talk to me about it," I replied, making Kali sigh, "She needs something to tether her to reality. Beating her into submission isn't going to work. It just pisses off her entity even more."

"So we're thinking Beast then," Kali said, but I shook my head.

"Can't be. Her genetics weren't necessarily coded for it."

"So then it's a genetic mutation."

"I think so, which mother isn't going to be happy about," I muttered as I watched Polly fall asleep at long last, "I told her using those genetics was a bad idea. She figured she could edit it to make it useful, but all she did was fuck it up more. As a result, Polly could die."

"Isn't the first time mother fucked with the wrong genetics," Kali replied under her breath, tapping her finger on the desk and she glanced up at the camera above us. I paused, glancing up at the camera, then down at Kali. A second later, I used magic to distort the feed.

"So you know the genetics they used for Polly," Kali said and I nodded, "Which one is fucking with her the most?"

"Blaine's," I said, making her blink and look at me in surprise, "I know, I thought it was Cerberus's too, but it's definitely Blaine's. I already knew his genetic make-up had potential for a mutation, and so did mother, but she figured with Tenjin around, we could edit the mutation to work in our favor, but it looks like all it did was fuck with the genetics she got from Cerberus."

"So she's whatever the fuck he is," Kali said after a moment.

"An artificial shifter," I answered, "Technically that's what Cerberus is. An artificial created with the ability to transform into a monster. Cerberus is able to transform into an oversized dump truck wolf with snake tails and teeth the size of a chef's knife. Polly seems to be trying to shift, but whatever she's trying to shift into isn't working. It's that mutation from Blaine's side of the family that's throwing it off."

"But their kids turned out okay, right," Kali asked, making me frown, "Ah, Keros, Holly, Ayo, and Ambrosius, right?"

"Ayo's adopted," I replied, making her nod in understanding, "His genetics are fire demon with a bit of mortal somewhere along the line. Ambrosius is the child of Blaine and Hades, not Blaine and Cerberus. I'm thinking Hades's genetics managed to piece things together where Blaine's couldn't, hence why Ambrosius even survived to adulthood. Keros and Holly, on the other hand, are products of Blaine and Cerberus."

"And neither of them have issues?"

"No," I muttered, "None that I know of. I know Keros is clairvoyant, but I think he gets that from Hades down the line. Holly doesn't seem to be able to do anything special, except cause chaos wherever she goes." Kali smirked at that as she took a bite of her sandwich.

"I kinda like her. She doesn't sit still."

"Could be a sign of a monster or beast of some kind, but she's old enough to where it should've manifested by now."

"Didn't Theo's Beast take a thousand years to manifest?"

"One thousand five hundred, but who's counting," I said with a scoff, which made Kali grin, "No, I think Holly's pretty normal, magic wise. She's definitely got something going on in that weirdo head of hers, though."

"I can't wait to meet her," Kali said, making me frown and glance at her as she ate some chips, "Or Lumen for that matter. Anyone who can make Five submit is impressive. Even when she was married to whatshername she didn't submit." I didn't answer right away because I had to rein in my temper when it came to Five's ex-wife.

I hadn't approved of the relationship right off the bat and told mother countless times that it wasn't going to end well. Of course, my thought had been that Five would be murdered in her sleep, but much to my relief, Five had been the one to kill her own wife. I was proud of her for finally standing up to her.

Too bad it ended with Five defecting.

Though, a part of me was relieved. Five had been awkward and shy, but she had such a fierce glare and that was one of the things that had driven her ex and mother insane. Five did her job because she was supposed to, but she was always happy to express her feelings over it, even if it did end with her getting backhanded.

Five dating Lumen now was funny to me, though. Whereas at the compound, Five was fierce and defiant, though awkward and standoffish, the Five I saw with Lumen was... different. It was oddly refreshing to see Five so eager to please, to see her gazing at Lumen like she was the only female on earth.

It was sweet.

Sad, because it wasn't going to end well— again, but I hoped she enjoyed it while it lasted.

"Don't let April hear you say that," I said to Kali at last, making her snort, "She'll get jealous if you keep talking about other females."

"Mkay, but talking about them is fine. It's not like I'm leaping on them the first chance I get and besides, we both know I'm not interested in anything like that." I tried not to laugh. She meant she wasn't interested in sex or cheating or anything of the sort. She was married to her duty, and her wife, but frankly, April was a cunt. I'd have much rather Kali ended up with someone who would treat her better, but April had been the first and only candidate that could handle Kali.

Not that I approved of how she did it, but Kali didn't care and it was Kali's relationship.

Of course, if ever given the chance to kill April, I would take great pleasure in doing so.

"Listen," I said after a moment, "I'm going to get going. I need to check on the apartment in Styx, then check-in with mother. Have you heard from her today?" Kali shook her head as I stood up to gather my things.

"No, but she did say she was going radio silent for a week a couple days ago. She said something about doing checks on the compounds."

"Did she say where she was starting?"

"Probably Atlantis."

"She needs to stop setting shit up there," I muttered, throwing my grocery bag onto my shoulder, "Don't know about you, but since Seven went and blew our cover, Atlantis has been on high alert. I hate visiting because I have to watch every single person I pass."

"Probably why she's going herself and not sending you," Kali pointed out, making me shrug, "Anyway, fine, but get some sleep, babe, your eyes look like shit."

"Wow, keep sweet talking me like that and I might need to stick around," I mused, making Kali laugh as she got up to throw her trash away.

"Nah, you eat all my snacks, fuck off."

"What did I say about the sweet talk?" I asked. Kali laughed again and gave me a playful punch in the stomach, which I returned with a kiss on her cheek. She laughed again, cupped my face in her hands and squeezed my cheeks.

"I mean it," she warned, making me raise an eyebrow, "Get some sleep. The more you run on empty, the more likely you are to make a mistake."

"Sleep is for the weak."

"Sleep is for the tired," Kali deadpanned, making me grin, then sigh as she kissed me on both cheeks now, "Please, Darling, get some sleep. For all of us." I just nodded and she let go so I could depart the room.

I left the compound in Hades to teleport back to my apartment in Styx.

Once again, the day was sunny and beautiful, despite the rain earlier in the day, but the moment I walked into my apartment, the air was thick and heavy and suffocating. A combination of uncontrolled emotions from a very powerful ghost.

I smiled faintly as I walked into the living room, but D'Angelo was nowhere to be found. I felt his energy in the apartment, but it seemed he was hiding out. Given the heaviness of the air, he was probably just crying somewhere alone.

I sat at the table, noticing D'Angelo had put my mail there. I smirked, reaching over to thumb through the spam, setting some aside to keep for appearances and throwing the rest through a paper shredder.

I took a shower, ate a protein bar from the grocery bag, and dressed in a pair of joggers as I walked over to the table while checking my phone. I didn't see any blinking dots, including Wren's, so that meant he was probably back home safe and sound, wherever the fuck that was. No sign of Hades or anyone else I had tagged, so I set my phone aside and wiped my hands down my face.

"Finally going to take a nap?" I smirked, lowering my hands to see D'Angelo glaring at me from across the table. He was fading in and out of existence, meaning he was low on magic. I fed him just the smallest amount to keep himself corporeal. He glared at me for it.

"Why do you keep me here?" He demanded.

"Because I'm a sad lonely fucker," I replied, making him roll his eyes, "Also I just love watching you squirm and pace. Are you thinking about lil Ryky? Is he safe? Is he alive? Did he keep your baby alive, or did he kill—"

"Shut up," D'Angelo snarled abruptly, and I just smiled tiredly, resting my chin in my hand as he glared at me, "You don't get to talk about him like that. And at this point, I don't care about the baby, as long as Ryk is alive and safe."

"Aww," I teased, making him flush further, "Forgoing the whole life begins at conception thing that lord Yhwhwa taught you? Or was that something your mother taught you?" D'Angelo gritted his teeth, clenching his fists against the table.

"How dare you mock him for everything he's gone through," he seethed as I sat back in my seat with my hands folded behind my head, "You have absolutely no idea what it's like to suffer."

"Nope, my life is hunky dory."

"Clearly, if you have no problem torturing your own brother," D'Angelo sneered, making me raise an eyebrow.

"I don't have a brother," I replied, making him curse in frustration, turning away like he couldn't stand to look at me and I just smiled, "What's the matter, my angelic and also very dead friend? Does it make you sad that you can't go see the love of your life that you just met?" D'Angelo was turning pink to his ears and gods, he was so easy to rile up, especially when it came to Ryk.

"I don't expect you to understand love at first sight, let alone love," D'Angelo snapped and I smiled.

"You're right. I don't understand it at all. Tell me, how is it that you fall in love at first sight? What if Ryk turned out to be a psychopath killer who eats babies?"

"I fell in love with him because I knew he wasn't a monster," D'Angelo snapped, making me just smile cluelessly, "Ryk is kindness, empathy, love, and truth incarnate. He has never lied to me, has never tricked me, has never harmed me. The moment he met me, he tried to heal me. Even when I was..." His voice trailed and he put his hands over his face.

I felt his despair, his misery. It engulfed him like a dark shadow and I could see it taking a toll on his soul. It made sense; ghosts could do nothing, but wallow in misery until they moved on, or until they became something worse. Poltergeists, ghouls, the list of ghostly apparitions that could form from a fucked up soul was endless.

The longer I kept D'Angelo here against his will, the more likely D'Angelo was to turn into one of those things and be permanently unable to reach Yhwhwa. The Lord of Heaven would never allow a fucked up spirit to reincarnate into an angel, and not to mention, D'Angelo was a traitor against Heaven now. If Yhwhwa knew about Bethany, he'd know about D'Angelo and probably send the guy's soul straight to Gehenna.

Probably didn't help that D'Angelo's soul was only going to get more and more corrupt the longer it was held back.

Strangely, the only thing D'Angelo's soul screamed for was peace for Ryk.

Not peace for himself, not peace for the world or his mother.

His soul begged for mercy for Ryk. Safety for Ryk. Love and protection for Ryk. Despite fantasizing in his dreams of living happily ever after with Ryk.

I smiled, but it was borne of bitterness.

"Ahh, D, I feel sorry for you," I said, making him snap his head up to glare at me, his hazel eyes teary, "Nah, I really do. I think one of the cruelest ways to go is probably at the hands of love itself." D'Angelo scowled.

"Love isn't killing me. You are."

"Heh, I may be an obstacle, sure, but at the end of the day, the thing that is going to turn you into an ugly bloodthirsty ghoul or a rage driven poltergeist isn't me. It's going to be that broken heart of yours. Trust me. It's how love always ends." I rose to my feet, grabbing my phone and heading to the sofa to turn on the TV. D'Angelo hovered nearby, glaring at me in confusion, but he was using too much power to stay corporeal and attentive to the conversation.

Eventually, he just dissipated. I felt him still in the room, but he wasn't strong enough to stay visible or do anything aside from float around and be sad.

"You're welcome to watch TV with me," I called out as I turned the TV and flipped through the channels. Eventually I found an old cartoon channel. The sound of old-timey music crackling through static and silent characters dancing and twirling on the screen was weirdly comforting. I had no idea what it was about these old cartoons, but they were soothing with their old music and no speaking.

Unfortunately, it was a little too soothing.

I knew the risks of laying down and watching TV alone with nothing, but texting Kali for attention. It had been so long since I'd last laid my head down, last closed my eyes and slept. I could feel the heaviness starting in my eyelids, the drowsiness in my thought process.

I tried to focus on more important things to bring into my sleep, anything to keep me from the darkest corners of my brain, of my subconscious.

The last thing I heard as I slipped into sleep was a character bonking himself on the head with a hammer so all his teeth splayed out like a keyboard. Like a fucking idiot.

It was difficult to have dreams when you didn't sleep often. And it was difficult to have dreams when life was a fucking nightmare. Even in my sleep, I couldn't hide from it.

"Why can't you just let me do what I need to do? Get the fuck outta my way!"

His harsh voice cut through my sleep from my nightmares. I remembered the way he was going through his things, throwing it across the floor or at the wall. A few times he hit me in the chest with whatever he pulled out of the desk drawer.

"Because I don't know what it is you're trying to do," I exclaimed, moving out of his line of fire to approach, but he slammed the desk drawer back in and in the process, splintered the wood.

"Where is the mail from this morning," Milo snarled abruptly, whirling on me and I froze as those dark eyes locked on me, "The mail that was delivered this morning. Where is it." Not a question, an order, and while I was used to Milo telling me what to do, I wasn't used to that tone of voice directed at me.

"I left it on the table for you," I murmured, scowling as he shoved past me and went to the table, "I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?" Milo didn't answer as he looked through the mail with urgency, then cursed and threw it down on the table.

"Did anything come with a stamp on it?" He demanded. I frowned.

"A stamp? You mean, like, outside mail?" We didn't get outside mail. The guardians sometimes did, but it was usually heavily searched.

"Yes, Darling."

"Oh, uh, no, I didn't see anything with a stamp," I said with a frown, watching Milo groan and reach up to rake his gloved hands through his dark blonde hair. It was strange to see him so worked up when I was used to him being the one with control in our relationship. Milo was almost always calm and observant. He was definitely a little more fun in the bedroom, but he didn't generally lash out like this.

I knew he was stressed, but it was hard to sort through the thoughts in his head. His mind was racing a hundred miles an hour and I couldn't pinpoint a single thought, and the more I tried, the harder it got to read his mind.

"Hey," Milo snapped, making me blink and look up to see him grabbing me by the jaw so I was looking at him, "Don't. Seriously."

"Okay, but—"

"Jasper. I fucking mean it. Out." I gritted my teeth, wanting to argue, but Milo had that fierce look in his eyes. He wasn't playing around, and while Milo's consequences when I disobeyed weren't nearly as bad as the other handlers, I didn't want to upset him, so I just gave him a single nod and tried to focus on his actions rather than his thoughts.

He shoved away from me and went back to the table, glared at the mail, then went back to the desk to start yanking out drawers again when his phone made a sound. He cursed and pulled it out with a sharp yes? I watched, waited, didn't eavesdrop on his thoughts or his conversation. His brows furrowed and he tensed, but he didn't say anything for a moment.

"No," he said at last, looking up and I was surprised when his eyes met mine, because he knew as well as I did that that connection would trigger my ability.

It didn't come. I'm finished. I scowled, because I had no idea what that thought was supposed to mean. Was he waiting for a package? From whom? Who outside knew about Milo?

"Jasper," Milo said as he hung up, making me frown as I watched him walk up to me and he had to tilt his head back to stare directly up at me, "Darling. Can you... do me a favor today? Can you grab some food from the kitchen to bring back to the room?"

"Huh?"

"Food, baby, can you bring some food," Milo said and I looked at him in confusion, "I just want to stay home for a couple days and not have to leave for anything. I've just been really... off lately." I cocked my head as he averted his eyes, meaning he didn't want me to see what was going on in his head. I lowered my eyes for a moment, disappointed that he was hiding something from me, but he did have higher clearance than the other handlers and he spoke with mother more than I did, so I didn't want to make a fuss.

I trusted Milo.

He was my husband.

Who else could I trust?

I left the room like he asked and went to the cafeteria where I could load up a paper bag with all kinds of goodies and treats. I purposely sought the best looking food, the highest quality snacks and protein bars, and even grabbed a pint of Milo's favorite vanilla bean ice cream, which was technically reserved for guardians, but Milo was above a guardian, above a normal handler, above everyone and everything else in the world.

At least to me.

I smiled thoughtfully as I stroked the label on the ice cream as I made my way back to the room, and at this point I wanted to scream, but I couldn't. I wanted to beg myself to go back to the cafeteria, beg to just go back in time to when Milo asked me to go to the cafeteria.

I should've said no.

I should've just stayed with him.

I should've put up more of a fight, should've taken Milo's hand and taken him to the bedroom where we would be alone and safe together forever.

Unfortunately, I didn't have full control of my nightmares when they got out of hand like this, when they took the normal course. All I could do was watch in misery as I made my way down the hallway toward our room. My phone dinged with a text from Kali and I fumbled with my groceries to take my phone out as I got to our door.

"Kali," I greeted as I got the phone to my ear and I heard her scoff, "Look, I'm a little busy right now."

Please don't open that door.

Don't open it.

"Yeah, you're about to get busier. Mother came back to headquarters and she's pissed."

"What else is new?" I asked with a smirk, managing to get the door open. I frowned, because the moment the door opened, there was a horrible smell. I froze, my groceries hitting the floor as that smell invaded my nostrils and it actually made me cough a little.

Blood.

The smell was so strong, so oppressive, that it burned my nostrils. I coughed again, pinching at my nose as I took a step into the room.

"Mil..." My voice trailed as I followed a long tendril of blood across the floor, my head cocking slowly as my brain tried to piece two and two together. I frowned, following the blood towards a larger pool.

"Jasper? Hey, what's going on—"

I knew my mouth was open at this point, and I knew I was making some kind of sound, but it was like suddenly nothing made sense. It didn't make sense that there was that huge of a pool of blood. It didn't make sense that Milo was just laying there on the floor, the blood still pooling out of his severed throat, filling the lake that was forming under his body. It didn't make sense that there was a huge knife slipping from those long delicate fingers.

The phone slipped my fingers and my knees buckled.

Why did you have to open the fucking door?

If I could just go back in time, if I could just go back even five minutes, surely I would have been able to save him. I would have been able to stop him. I would have been able to make him feel better, done something, anything to stop him.

Immediately panic overtook my body. I remembered crawling through that pool of blood, muffled sobs reaching my ears from somewhere. I didn't recognize my own voice because it didn't sound like me, it didn't sound like anything I'd ever heard come out of me, and yet I could hear the choking desperate sobs echo around me as I managed to get to Milo's body.

I couldn't form words. I couldn't form coherent thoughts.

All that came out was sobs and screaming. Panic had me grabbing at Milo's body, hoping to feel something, some kind of warmth, some inkling that his soul was still there for me, but it was nothing, except an empty vessel with clouded eyes staring up at the ceiling.

I woke up with a start, my eyes snapping up to stare up at my apartment ceiling in Styx, my breath sawing out of my lungs like I'd just run a marathon. I cursed, rolling over onto my side and grabbing the sofa for support to keep myself from falling. I reached across to the end table, snatching my phone off it to see I'd only been asleep for two hours.

I groaned, keeping my phone face down as I tried to catch my breath from my nightmares.

Fucking shit. Two hours in what, four days? I sighed in frustration, wiping my hands down my face.

It didn't matter how much time had passed.

It didn't matter that I counted the days, the hours, the minutes.

My dreams, my Beast, were always happy to remind me of what I once had, of what I once loved and cared for. My Beast wanted to live in fantasies that were marred by blood and misery.

Even if it meant I got no sleep.

I accepted it. It made sense. My Beast was punishing me for not saving our master, our handler... our husband. When it came right down to it, no matter who slit Milo's throat, at the end of the day, the reason he died was because of me.

Simple as that.

I hadn't been attentive enough. I hadn't behaved well enough. If I had done everything Milo had asked of me, if I had behaved better, maybe he'd still be around. Maybe he would still have the confidence to go on. Maybe he would have had more faith in me.

"Ugh, fuck," I grunted, throwing myself up into a sitting position as I rubbed at my temples. I could feel a headache starting to pound there. I heaved myself up and hobbled over to where my jacket was thrown on the back of my chair. I grabbed it and my phone before heading out for the night.

It was still late, or maybe early, depending on how you saw it.

No sun in the sky, just a blanket of stars that sparkled and gleamed above the city, like a mirror image of it honestly. Strangely, the light pollution wasn't as bad here as it was in the mortal realm. In the mortal realm, staring up at the sky was a little disheartening, because there was just light coming from everywhere, drowning the stars, drowning the thousands and thousands of lives that had lived before them.

It was almost like hiding from the ancestors.

Made sense. The universe had a lot to be ashamed of, especially lately. It was almost like the universe was falling asleep on us, closing its eyes and giving up.

Or maybe that's how it felt when Milo died.

Yeah. That was pretty accurate.

I pulled out a cigarette, lit up, and just went for a walk. It was easier to walk off the sleep, grab a coffee when the first shop opened, then head to work for my first day as a server trainee.

I smirked as I took a drag, flicking ash off the end of my cigarette.

That's right. There's still work to do, so it's not like I can slack off. With that in mind, I headed toward my favorite coffee shop across town. I took out my phone to see I'd gotten a couple of texts from Kali to inform me Polly seemed to be in good spirits today and was happily playing video games to occupy her time in her bunk. I smiled in relief, sending Kali a text to confirm I'd seen her messages. She responded with a sticker of two bunnies kissing, making me grin.

Gods, she's cute sometimes. I walked into the coffee shop just minutes after they opened and ordered my drink as I tucked my phone away. At the same time, I heard a ping from my tracking app and took it out as I grabbed my coffee from the counter.

I watched a blue blinking dot appear on the screen and the label above it read that it was Wren's name. I smiled slowly as I left the coffee shop, taking a sip of my bold black coffee. I followed Wren's blinking dot to what appeared to be some kind of breakfast restaurant, which was a little surprising. If Wren was out to eat, he was normally at a bar with the Cousins, but today he was at a breakfast place.

And from the looks of it, a couple of the Cousins had joined him, including Keros and Holly. I pocketed my phone and decided to swing by. I tossed my coffee on the way as I came onto the street with the restaurant. Not too far from Theo's palace, so I made note to avoid the authorities that were milling around outside his property.

I wasn't particularly afraid of the black skeletal soldiers that walked around without any purpose aside from protection. The sentient soldiers were having a smoke by the gates, one of them hanging out near the fountain with a siren. I left them to their boring duties as I entered the breakfast shop. Luckily the bell overhead didn't make a sound when I came inside and found a nice quiet spot... two tables behind where Wren was sitting with Keros, Holly, and Hadrian.

It took me a moment to see Hadrian at the booth, because he seemed so quiet. A pretty princess through and through with his long glossy black hair, sweet feminine features that were at odds with his deep masculine voice, slender body, and high-fashion. He looked like he was ready to go to a Coachella event.

Keros was wearing his Peace Officer uniform, meaning he was probably going to head to work after this. I made a mental note to avoid his detection. Keros would most likely catch bits and pieces of me through his visions. I couldn't be certain he wouldn't recognize me, so I made sure to keep my head down as I scanned the menu.

Holly and Wren didn't look prepared for breakfast. In fact, both of them seemed to still be in their pajamas judging from the rumpled joggers and crooked t-shirts. Holly's ridiculously long dark hair was coiled up into a thick messy bun that was sliding down the side of her head while she mindlessly chewed on a bagel. Wren's hair was a disheveled mess, but he didn't seem to care as he sucked down a glass of orange juice.

"You're starting to look like Stanton," Hadrian commented to Wren, who grunted, "Isn't that a good thing?" Wren flushed, averting his eyes.

I am not. I just... His thoughts were still a bit jumbled, but I managed to catch some of his voice through the madness that was in his head. I tried not to smile. I didn't have to be psychic to know that Wren admired his parents.

It probably started as gratitude for taking him in when they found him. Now, it seemed almost like Wren just wanted to be like his parents; brave, determined, loving, caring. All of these things Wren strived for, to obtain and to maintain.

How sweet that his goal in life was to just find what his parents had.

That deep intense connection that could carry them through the fires of Gehenna together.

Or so they thought.

"I think you look cute without the goatee mutant on your face," Holly said, making Wren roll his eyes, "Stanton pulls it off cuz he's old. You're too baby-faced for facial hair, Wrenny."

"Okay, I shaved it because it was uncomfortable," Wren answered dryly, "Can we stop talking about my face?"

"Nah, too cute," Holly said, patting his shoulder and leaning over to give him a kiss on the cheek. Wren rolled his eyes, but didn't fight her as he picked up a piece of toast to munch into.

"Still feeling queasy?" Keros asked him. Wren grimaced.

"Been feeling queasy since yesterday," he muttered, "I think it's my heat, but Hades brought over some meds, so I'm feeling... alive anyway." Keros gave him a grim smile.

"Hopefully they can kick in soon. Physical hunger doesn't play well with incubi hunger."

"I'm working on it," Wren mumbled, rubbing at his eye sleepily and he groaned, "I have an appointment today, but I just want to stay home."

"With Three?" Holly asked, impressed. Wren snorted hard.

"I want to go home home, not back to Niko's place," he said, making me raise an eyebrow as I stirred my coffee around. So they were staying at Niko's place, and it took everything I had not to laugh. I wasn't mocking the conversation; I was actually fucking proud of Niko.

Niko's place? He had his own home. He used to be obsessed with his room, always fighting anyone who tried to go in without his permission, and he hated that he wasn't allowed to go all out on decorating his room. Mother didn't even let him have a painting on the wall.

He's destructive, mother had chided me when I brought it up once, he can't be trusted to care for delicate objects. I wonder how she felt about Niko having his own house, his own clothing, his own everything. I smiled briefly because I knew Niko was probably having a fucking field day with his newfound freedom.

Too bad I couldn't find him to congratulate him.

"And remember that guy I told you about," Wren muttered, making Keros and Holly glance up as Hadrian just calmly sipped his latte, "He's a server trainee now. Guaranteed he's gonna start harassing Beni even more now."

"He hates Beni?" Holly asked.

"Who hates Beni?" Keros asked at the same time. They looked at each other pointedly, which was hilarious considering they looked alike when they did that. It was the same kind of annoyed look that Blaine himself invented. I had seen that look in Polly's face whenever she looked at me for teasing her too much.

"He's weird," Wren deadpanned, and for some reason, the confirmation that he wasn't a fan of Beni was the most validating fucking thing in the conversation and I had to resist the urge to hit the table with my fist in agreement, "He's not bad, just weird. He tries too hard and I'm just there for my appointment and nothing else. Tired of being offered snacks and condoms and sex toys."

"Isn't that what the appointment is for," Keros asked, making Wren glare at him, "No, I mean, like, aren't you supposed to be enjoying it? How do you feed yourself if you don't enjoy it?"

"I eat just enough to survive and carry on with my day."

"No wonder Alaric is worried about you," Holly said and Wren stiffened at the comment, which made Holly sigh and wave his concern off, "No, he's not like stressin', babe, but he's definitely worried that you're not eating enough. Stanton is gonna start to notice too; you think he won't cuz he's always busy, but he will when he goes to pick you up and accidentally flings you across the universe cuz you're so light." Keros snorted at the imagery and Wren just rolled his eyes.

"I'm fine," Wren assured, finishing his coffee before he rose to his feet, "I'm gonna head out. I have another job before my appointment and my target is nearby."

"Hey, be careful this time," Holly scolded, patting Wren's back, "You need to eat. Get your fill and just move on with your day, Wrenny. Eat plenty, and if Beni isn't satisfying you, why not try the new dude?" Wren actually blushed to the tips of his ears and I hid my face behind my coffee to hide my laughter.

"No way," Wren said immediately, making everyone at the table raise an eyebrow at the hostility and that seemed to just embarrass Wren further, "No, he reminds me of Three. He's a cocky bastard." I was a little offended by the comparison.

Really? Three? I'm like Three?

The guy wasn't a total piece of shit, but he was sure annoying with his unbridled excitement and uncontrollable mouth.

At least I had my good looks.

Three looked like a typical pretty boy model type and it had gotten worse since he found his place in Hades where he was doing photoshoots and modeling jobs for the Demonic Fashion brand owned by Malachi.

"You do talk about Three a lot," Hadrian said, making Wren stare at him, "What? I noticed you talk about him quite often and since the new guy showed up at The Winged Serpent, he's all you talk about now."

"That's not true," Wren said immediately, making Hadrian raise an eyebrow skeptically and Holly cleared her throat, coughing awkwardly as she went to sip at her coffee, "What? It's not true! He's just always there, it's so annoying. I literally can't walk in without him making some shitty comment about being house favorite or Hades's favorite or some bullshit like that."

"You are the favorite, though," Hadrian pointed out, making Wren stare at him.

"I thought you were."

"I was, until I stopped listening to Hades."

"That's not my fault," Wren deadpanned, making Holly and Keros laugh while Hadrian just rolled his eyes, "I'm gonna head out before I end up showing up with blood on my fists."

"Aw, was that a threat," Holly teased as Wren grimaced and pulled away from her when she tapped his fingers on the back of her seat, "Wrenny, you're getting so cute lately. I like seeing you all flustered."

"I'm not flustered," Wren exclaimed, then paused to take a deep breath as his cousins stared at him with amusement, "I'm going to work. Bye."

"Bye, cutie patootie!"

"Fuck you, Holly."

"Not into that, but thanks for the offer!"

I smirked, rising to my feet and taking my coffee as I watched Wren walk out the door with a punch to the door so it swung open, then very slowly closed behind me as I followed him out at a reasonable distance.

I took a sip of my coffee before tossing that one in the garbage, allowing my magic to slip out and cover my presence.

Now... let's see what you get up to, Wrenny.