Sarah Gilmore

Knowing Wes wouldn't be there when I got home, my shift dragged. I was thankful that the night hadn't brought too many overwhelming cases. I filled my downtime with checking supplies, writing my reports and visiting my patients. There was always something to do.

As my shift wrapped up, Ashton Sullivan came walking up to me. I hadn't looked up from finishing jotting down my notes on a chart, but I knew it was him by the faint whiff of his cologne.

"Good morning, Doctor Gilmore."

"Morning," I said into my paperwork as he leaned against the counter beside me.

"I was hoping you might have some free time to grab a cup of coffee when you get off your shift. Mine doesn't start for another hour."

"Um, I'm really pretty exhausted, Ashton, and all I really want is sleep."

"Just a coffee and chat, nothing too thrilling." As I looked up at him, I caved. His smiling face was too kind and too hopeful for me to crush it.

I nodded, "Yeah. Alright, I can meet you at the shop in the lobby when I'm finished."

"Wonderful, I'll see you in just a bit." He walked towards the elevator as I got back to writing. Jayla took his place.

"What happened to 'Mr. Amazing-Blast-From-The-Past?' Did it not work out?"

"I don't even know. To be completely honest," I leaned over to whisper to her, "I don't know what we are. There is chemistry, but I have no clue what to do next. I have fought for everything I have today and the last time I relied on a man; things ended really badly."

"That doesn't mean this one is the same way, honey. Let me ask you this, is he good to you?"

"Yes," I say as I lose myself in daydreams.

"Does he make you cry? Does he hurt you?"

"No!"

"And you already told me that there is some serious chemistry, so what is your heart telling you?"

"To take a chance," I admitted.

"Listen, the way I see it is you're holding your own self back. If you want a man, and a good one, you have to follow your heart."

"But—" I started.

Emily, another nurse on shift with us, passed through and whistled low. "Oh boy, Jayla giving out her love voodoo!"

"Hush, you," Jayla laughed, "It worked for you and that cute lawyer man from the coffee shop."

"Oh, I know it did," Emily smiled brightly before disappearing with a chart and bag of saline.

"Where was I?" Jayla paused for a moment before continuing. "Oh! It won't be easy, because you're so set in your ways. Just let love in. You hear me? Let love in. You're still in control. From everything you've said, he hasn't overstepped, not once, right?"

"No, never."

"Then what's the worst that could happen? You know him better than I do."

"The worst? I could get rejected. He may not be interested in a relationship. He could use me and then leave me and I'd be shattered. He might be an undercover serial killer and murder me in my sleep?"

"Girl, you are dark and twisted sometimes," she laughed.

"I'm sure I could think of worse, but yeah. You're not wrong."

"All I'm saying is that if you never open that door, never let love have a chance in your life, you will surely have it pass you by. 100% failure to have love in your life." She reached for my hand and her age-spotted, wrinkled hand. Her sharp eyes bore into me, and as tired as I was, I knew actively listening would be better than trying to half-ass it.

She finished by saying, "If I were you and reconnected with a man like him, I would take the leap. Ya'll let one another go and came back to each other. Some folk aren't ever that lucky. What you have is truly special, Sha. Don't let it pass you by."

Emotions swirled in my belly and I warred with myself to keep them in check. Untrusting of my own heart to not speak those emotions, I nodded my head. Jayla gave me a motherly pat and wandered off to leave me to do my paperwork.

Finishing up before I changed out of my scrubs and back into my worn jeans and a thick-strapped tank. My bag felt heavier on my shoulder as I exited the elevator to the lower lobby.

Ashton sat at one of the tables by the windows, already with a drink. I hopped in line and ordered a cappuccino with a double shot of espresso added with one of their turkey, bacon, and cheese paninis. Besides a shower and my own bed, food and caffeine were a must.

"Sarah, over here," Ashton called me over as I waited for my food.

I held up my index finger, signaling that I was waiting for my food and he nodded. He seemed over-eager for this coffee get-together and I started freaking out internally.

Shit! Did he think this was a date? Was this a date?

Reflecting on this made me also realize I was bad at this and I didn't know how to approach him. When my order came up, I just stood there, zoned out, looking at my sandwich.

"Ma'am? This is your order, correct?" The sweet smiling young barista asked me.

"It is," I smiled back and took my plate, "thank you."

As I approached his table, he stood and rounded the table to pull my chair out. I couldn't stop the deep sigh that came with the halt of my feet.

"Something wrong?" He asked.

"What is this, Ashton?"

"Coffee?" He looked so innocent as he stood there waiting for me.

"Coffee? This doesn't feel like just coffee. I can get my own chair." I felt jumpy and uncomfortable. Perhaps it was the long shift or maybe the lack of sleep, but I didn't like it.

"Oh, yeah. Okay Sarah, sorry." He returned to his seat but refused to sit until I had. This was already awkward.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Just wanted to catch up. We haven't really talked in a while and I figured coffee would be a nice way to do that."

He may have been a brilliant doctor, but his socialization skills were lacking in casual settings.

"I'll give you my time, Ashton, but I think I'd rather keep our relationship professional." I didn't even want to acknowledge that our dinner plans had been canceled or that he hadn't attempted to reschedule with me.

Reveling in the re-energized emotions and feelings that came with Wes and the thought of trying to date or plan an outing with another man seemed wrong.

"Oh, yeah, of course," Ashton replied casually. It was the first time I felt like he was relenting.

We sat in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes. As soon as I'd taken the first bite of my sandwich, he said, "Wes Dalton seems nice. How did the two of you get together?"

Nearly choking on my food, I sat forward and looked into his emotionless face.

"Sorry?"

"Wes Dalton. The man who was at your house the night we were supposed to go out. He seems nice."

What. The. Fuck.

Had they actually met? It had seemed like a coincidence that Wes just happened to be there when... an unexpected emergency happened at the Hospital, forcing Ashton to cancel.

Forcefully finishing my bite, I scratched an itch beneath my collar, fully intending on answering him, but then Ashton whistled low, "Nice hickey, Gilmore."

My hand stilled and my gaze shot to his. His eyes never left mine as he sipped his coffee.

Shutting my eyes tightly, this was going horribly, and I was ready to inflict harm on Wes Dalton.