4: Sass Battle

"Fish fingers and custard is better!" Lia shouted at Mal

"No, fish and chips!" Mal shouted back. The girls had been going at this for a while now, arguing which food was better. Mindy was getting tired of hearing them argue, so she got up and left.

Connor and another man walked out of the bathroom. Lia watched them leave, and saw them smile, in the exact same way, at the exact same time. Huh, that's Ood, she thought, then smirked at her joke.

Mal didn't notice the men, but she did notice Lia's smirk. "What was that about?" She asked her friend.

"Oh, just a joke in my head. I said, 'huh, that's Ood,'."

"What's Ood?" Mal asked, a little worried.

"Connor, and this other man. They walked out of the bathroom, and Connor seemed just fine, like he wasn't having a panic attack five minutes ago." Lia whispered, in case someone heard them, even though they were alone in the cafeteria.

"That is Ood. Let's go find, The Doctor, Kate, and Osgood." Mal said, standing up, putting her tray with the other dirty ones, Lia followed her.

They walked out of the cafeteria, they started talking about the upcoming Christmas special, 'the Husbands Of River Song'

"How do you think River is going to find out that The Doctor, is The Doctor?" Mal asked Lia.

"Um, I don't know. Maybe The Doctor tells her, or she sees the TARDIS. But the pictures they let out, with The Doctor in those antlers that Wilf wore during Turn Left, and The Doctor says, 'Do I have something on my head?'." I was on the floor laughing!" Lia laughed.

"Yeah, maybe River finds out on her o-"

"What about River?" The Doctor asked looking a little heartbroken at the mention of her name, even though he only knew her for a short amount of time, River new his real name.

Lia and Mal exchange glances and smirk at each other. "Spoilers!" They say in unison.

Everyone within hearing distance groaned. "Why does everything about her have to be a spoiler? Can't I know something?"

"Spoilers. No, you can't know anything." Lia told The Doctor. Mal stepped back, Lia was getting angry. Don't mess with her, Mal thought.

"Well, why not?" He countered. And we thought 11 was childish...

"Because, if you find out anything, it would cause a paradox, and the whole of time will fracture! She's very important. Believe me, you'll see her again." Lia shouted.

"Well, the laws of time should not apply to me! I am the last Time Lord," Well... "We invented time. I make my own my own rules! And you can't tell me what to do."

"Oh, no..." Mal muttered.

"Tell you what to do?! I'm trying to keep you from making a huge mistake. So, you know what I am gonn-" Lia stated, but was cut off by The Doctor.

"Moisturize me?" The Doctor asked. Ohhh...

"Shove it, spaceman!"

"Earth girl."

"Martian."

"American." Snap, don't test us americans! Mal thought, I should intervene... Nope, he dug himself this hole, he can dig himself out again.

"Theta." Lia yelled, The Doctor froze.

"How do you know that?" He asked her.

"Oh, the Master told me! No, almost every fangirl knows your Academy Name, but so far, only River knows your real name." Lia told him. Mal decided to step up next to Lia and agree with her.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure Osgood knows it, too." Osgood nodded, and pulled out her inhaler.

"Okay. That wasn't as private as I would've hoped. But, okay." The Doctor finally agreed.

"Now, Doctor, if someone says, Spoilers, are you going to keep pestering them for details?" Lia asked him, in a 'cross mother' voice.

"No, Ma'am." He sulked. Mal burst out laughing at that, she couldn't suppress her giggles anymore. The Doctor, Kate and Lia glared at her.

"Sorry, sorry, just a fifteen year old just told you what to do, you're, what, 907 now?" She gasped between breaths. He nodded. "That's, that's just hilarious!"

"Malia, can't you see we're trying to have an argument here?" Lia asked her.

"Sorry. Continue." Mal bowed and stepped back.

"Now, what are we not going to do?"

"Not keep pestering for details when someone says, spoilers." The Doctor sighed, upset a 15 year old was being his mother.

"And?" Lia asked, gesturing with her hand for him to continue.

"And not bend the laws of time and space."

"Good, Martian Boy." Lia smirked. Mal started laughing again.

"Could you not call me that, it reminds me of," he paused, Mal and Lia nodded.

"Okay," Mal clapped her hands getting the attention of The Doctor, Kate, Osgood, Lia, and a few other workers, including Connor. "We apparently have a rogue Cyberman, or something else, we need to find out what. Kate, bring us surveillance, Osgood, help The Doctor with what ever he's doing, and Lia, with me." Mal ordered.

"Um, excuse me who's in charge?" Kate asked.

"Sorry, ma'am, awaiting orders." Mal and Lia smirked at each other.

"Do what Mal said." Kate said, after thinking it over for a few minutes. The girls giggled. And The Doctor looked at them, are they trying to quote me? This is like the third quote. The Doctor pondered.

"Doctor, Osgood, over here please." Mal asked in a whisper and lead them away to the hallway.

After making sure no one could hear them, Mal said, "Ok, Connor, and this other man, they walked out of the bathroom. And when Connor walked out, he acted like he hadn't been having a panic attack five minutes prior."

"And when they walked out, their steps were in sync, the smiled in sync, everything was in sync. And when they stopped smiling, their faces were void of any emotion. Like Adoela, and the others who were upgraded, but not you know upgraded." Lia whispered. Osgood used her inhaler again.

"So, y, you think, that t, there are, C, Cybermen Drones here?" Osgood asked.

"Yeah. Maybe, have you heard scuttling while you've worked here?" Mal asked her.

"Um, n, no, I don't t, thin- wait, yes, yes I have." Osgood replied using her inhaler.

"Oh, great-" Lia said, "Cybermites." The girls said in unison.

"No. I hate them as much as I hate pears." The Doctor said, a disgusted look on his face.

"I had a pear a little while ago, in the cafeteria." Lia smirked. She liked getting on The Doctor's nerves, apparently.

"Ugh! Why would you do such a thing?!" He asked. Lia shrugged.

"Stop it! Geez. Come on, let's see what we can find out about Connor." Mal said cutting them off. Lia was about as bad as Jack.

They headed off to a computer to look up Connor's file. "Hmm. It says here he went missing for a week, but showed back up saying he had some family issues." Lia said, her 'Moose' side popping up. Mindy walked over seeing what they were doing. "Mindy, what happened when Connor went missing for a week?"

"Well, he said family issues, but he has a sister that he never talks to and everyone else disowned him, or passed away. Why? Is there something wrong with Connor?" Mindy asked.

"Um," Lia looked to The Doctor for help, he nodded giving Lia the silent affirmation to say what she needed to say. "Yes, we think that, Connor, is um, we thinks he is a Cybermen Drone."

"A What?!" Mindy asked.

"A Cybermen Drone." Mal informed her.

"What does that mean?!" Mindy was near hysterical now.

"It means that Connor is a mindless drone. And there is no way to reverse the process."

"Where's the cards when you need them?" Lia leaned over and asked Mal, she shrugged.

"With Clara." Mal said, Lia nodded. Where was Clara when you needed her?"

Mindy started crying Mal walked over to her and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, pulling her into a hug, letting the woman cry. "Rude, and not ginger!" Lia hissed in The Doctor ear.

"Oh, was I being rude again?" Mal, Lia, and Osgood nodded.

"H, how can we, s, stop, this from h, h, happening?" Mindy asked

"By finding the CyberKing, and stopping him." The Doctor said. Mindy's sobs had finally subsided.

"Well, then let's go kick some alien butt."

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