I spend the rest of the day in my room unable to be around people , I just want to hide. My dad tells me that gossipy barmaid had a stroke, he explained she was in the best place - in hospital and that they will do all they can to help her. I feel overwhelmed with guilt, did my constant questions do this to her? I've become so consumed I didn't realise the people I've hurt or put in harms path along the way, like a maggot in an apple, it's eating away at me.

Bell comes in to check on me and asks me if I'm hungry  for the first time in weeks I speak to her, just a simple "no" but she looks relieved that I'm speaking. She probably thinks I've given up, that I no longer have any more fight in me. She asks if I'm ok and I simply nod she doesn't hang about or loiter, she feels like she is winning so leaves while ahead.

What I have to do now is to go straight to the source, go to the person or should I say people who are closest to her because they are the only ones who can give me the truth about why Bell is so desperate to keep us here.

I will have to get the feral boys to tell me, to do that I will have to get them to come out of hiding, I will have to put myself in danger because I think they are still under strict orders to keep me safe. So whatever it takes I will have to bring them out from the darkness. I don't know how I'm going to get them to tell me anything, for them to betray their master 'The Beloved Bell' but I know it is the only way that I have any chance of getting to the truth.

I can't let any more people be harmed or hurt, while I try and find the truth so I will trick or somehow deceive the dogs - her feral boys. They are the only people who truly know her, the thought of being alone and at my weakest as I would have to be in danger to get their attention scares me but I can't let my fear hold me back .

I haven't for a while heard or seen them but just because I haven't doesn't mean they're not here, they lurk in the shadows, they watch in the dark. Wherever Bell is, they won't be far behind. But once I speak to the feral boys I know they will go back and tell Bell so I will only have a matter of time to get me and dad away from here.

I need to plan a way for us to leave as quickly as we can without Bell finding out. To do that I'm going to have to ask the vicar for help. I don't know if he will but I have no other choice as he seems to be the only one who sees her for what she is. He is also the only person who has tried to stand up against her, I can only hope that if he knows how truly desperate I am to leave - he will find it within himself to stand up against her one more time. I will try my upmost to keep him out of it, so she is unaware that he will be helping us because I don't want anyone else hurt or in danger because of me.

I will have to until necessary play the part and be submissive to her, let her think she has worn me down that I am going nowhere but as soon as I get the chance to lure out those feral boys - I will get the truth if it kills me. Once I have the proof dad will finally believe me, he will see what she's been up to this whole time, then we will need to run and fast; I will finally know why she was so desperate to keep us here. We will have to leave here before we get hurt because as desperate as dad is to set roots down here, I'm also desperate to flee because I have horrible gut feeling something truly bad is around the corner.

From the very pit of my stomach I feel this Tornado build up off momentum, it's crashing around me, destroying anything in its path and it is only a matter of time before we get swept away in it. We need to leave and start somewhere new have the fresh start we were promised .

The Vicars words ring in my mind taunting me how Bell needs to tell me the truth? I assume what really went down in the church, what does she know about me that I don't know about my own self?