My chest is getting tighter and tighter the closer she moves to me the breath is being pushed out of my body, my ribs crack and I feel them splinter inside of me like match sticks. I try to scream out but I can't, no noise slips from my mouth. I'm paralysed pinned to the bed, she's in the corner of the room floating towards me like smoke, a black smoke sucking all the oxygen out of my lungs.

Her eyes penetrating into mine as if she's looking into my mind, searching my memories for something she needs. I know those eyes because they look so much like mine, that is the only human feature in this disfigured, tortured face that looks twisted in horror and pain. She floats upwards from my feet until she's laying parallel above me, her hair is dripping onto my face, falling on my cheeks like cold wet seaweed that makes my skin crawl and itch. I frantically try to scream, to arch my body up to break me from these invisible ties that have bound me down, but nothing. My hands and feet start to feel cold and wet, I dart my eyes down to try to see what is there.

There is moss growing all over my rigid body, it spreads and covers my feet, legs, hands and arms like a wild, diseased rash, it covers my body and consumes my skin. The weight of it pushing me further and further into the bed as if I will sink right through.

She arches her head back as if trying to scream but her mouth is sealed shut she thrashes above me trying to prise and rip her lips apart, they split to which I hear the skin tear as her mouth opens into a howl. Her blood from the ripped skin trickles down on to my forehead, warm and sticky running down into my eyes.

She howls from the pit of her stomach, the cry of a broken soul, it rings in my ears and pierces my brain. I close my eyes and pray for this to end, she lowers down until my face is covered in her wet straggly stringy hair,  I feel my heart rate slow down as if it's struggling to even pump and beat any more, the blood from her ripped lips drip into my ear as she whispers in her crackling distorted hoarse voice "I'm so sorry.... You have to run" then a blow rips into my chest as if it's been punched by her, jolting my heart into beating again.

I fly up from my bed, my body gasping for air, my limbs aching and throbbing as I scream out into the never-ending darkness that feels so empty "MUM"  but she's gone.

I've had dreams of my mother for as long as I can remember but never like that. It's always the same, my brain revisiting that last moment as if it's burnt into my mind for me to never forget, to carry with me for always. I know people would think I was crazy, I was a baby so how could I remember her last moments, but I do. This time was different, something sinister, a harsh warning? or maybe a desperate plea from beyond the grave, but I have no idea for what.

I never tell my Dad about my dreams, they feel so private, my only last personal link to her and I don't want to share my only moments that I have with her, even with him. Even if they leave my heart aching , broken into a million pieces.