Chapter Twenty-One
Hans stared up at the gates of the camp, Klara tucked in close beside him. This was nothing like the camps he was used to. The prisoners and the soldiers easily conversed with one another, and he could even see a few of them sharing cigarettes. He'd had no idea that there were so many of these prisoner of war camps in Britain.
Hans pulled his sister to one side as a large group of men returned from their day's work, chatting to one another as they passed through the gates. He searched the men's faces. Kai wasn't amongst them. Daniel had assured them that he was here; apparently he had been captured in France and sent here not long ago, assigned to help build new blocks of flats. Daniel had sent Hans and Klara to England armed with letters of passage, as well as an order to have Kai released. He had a good reputation and was happy to use it to aid his oldest friend. Though, Daniel had stayed in France for the time being and said that he would return to help them settle into the house in Scotland very soon.
Hans steered Klara to the soldiers on the gate, bidding her to wait for him as he went to talk to them. She watched Hans as he conversed with the British soldiers. Her English was rusty, so she was struggling to work out what they were saying. They seemed to be expecting him though and seemed amicable. She watched him with hopeful eyes as he came to stand beside her once more.
"He's here," Hans confirmed, Klara letting out a long, relieved breath. "They're just discharging him, then he can leave with us."
"I really must write to Daniel," she murmured.
Hans' arm wound around her to hug her close to him as he kissed the top of her head. "He'd like that. He's always had a soft spot for you. Sometimes I wonder if he was only my friend because he wanted to get close to you."
"Hush," she ordered, her hand trembling a little.
"Don't fret, you'll have your boy in your arms again soon enough."
"Thank you, Hans. Truly. We're safe because of you."
"You're my family. How could I not?" he said, forcing a small smile. But then his eyes fell vacant again. They always did nowadays.
When he had returned from his search for Anna, he was inconsolable. He wouldn't eat, barely slept and refused to talk to Klara. She'd thought at first that Anna must have died, and she hadn't known how to approach it. Hans knew how difficult it had been for her. He knew how his presence at that time had sucked the joy from the room. But when Daniel had finally called and told them of Kai's whereabouts, Hans started to come around again.
He'd told Klara what had happened, yet she still had had no idea how to comfort him. She'd never known him like this and told him constantly how annoyed she was at Anna. Klara could understand how a woman that had loved her brother so deeply could just forget him after everything they had been through together. Hans had to be the one to point out that he had left Anna behind, and that really, he had never deserved a second chance. She cursed her brother and his overly calculated mind. Why did he have to do this to himself?
Hans' mind drifted to Anna now. He imagined them lying in bed together, her chocolate hair running down her back as she lay across his chest. His mind fixated on her chatting away about what it would be like to be an archaeologist, her finger absentmindedly trailing circles across his skin. He could almost feel the small of her back against his palm, the glorious dip towards the base of her spine so perfectly suited to his hand. He flexed it now, as if to reignite the feeling.
Hans could see Klara watching him, and the pity in her eyes. He sighed heavily. "Don't look at me like that. It's no one's fault but my own."
"Does that mean I'm not allowed to feel bad for you?"
"It means you shouldn't," he said quietly. "She was happy, Klara. I can at least live out the rest of my life knowing she is all right."
"You should have fought for her," insisted Klara.
"I lost that right a long time ago."
"You made a mistake!"
"And that mistake cost people their lives! Not to mention the other vile things those men then did to her."
"That was them, not you!"
"If I hadn't left her, she would have been looked after," he spat, staring straight at Klara. "This new man..." Hans began but had to stop. It was as though there were bile in his mouth. He breathed deeply, attempting to calm himself. "He makes her happy."
"How could you truly know that? You didn't talk to her-"
"I didn't need to. I could see it in her expression." He fell quiet again, his eyes filled with pain. "If she looked at him like that, then there was no turning back. I know her. She doesn't let anyone go lightly. Her love for her sister proved that." He looked at her, blinking away the tears welling in his eyes. "Come now, let's not spoil our reunion with Kai."
"Hans, I really think you should reach out to her," murmured Klara. "If she's as loyal as you say she is, she'll want to know you're safe. Even if she doesn't want to be with you."
Hans swallowed the lump in his throat. "She'll be leaving for America. There's no point. It's done now." His fist clenched, Klara taking it in her hands. "I just wish I'd had the courage to hold her one last time. I wish I'd had the courage for so many things."
Klara went to speak when the gate in front of them opened.
Kai walked out, a tatty bag slung over his shoulder. His eyes were narrowed as he thanked the guard on duty, his whole demeanour apprehensive. He looked around, confused as to what was happening. Then he saw his mother.
"Kai," she managed, both of them running towards each other, Klara wrapping her arms tightly around her son. She was crying loudly, Kai squeezing her with his eyes tightly shut.
Hans watched them, a smile spreading over his face. He hadn't felt this warmth spread through him since he had danced with Anna at their engagement party.
"Mother," said Kai. "I've missed you so much!"
"And I you," she said, drawing back a little so that Kai could see Hans.
"My boy," said Hans, both of them embracing.
"How did you manage this?" asked Kai. "This had to be you."
"Old friends," Hans said, holding him at arms-length so he could inspect him. "You're far too skinny."
"Speak for yourself," he retorted playfully. "You look like shit, old man."
"Kai!" scolded his mother, but they all laughed.
Hans felt a sting in his heart. No one had called him that since Karl. It was one of the reason's he'd taken such a liking to him; Karl had always reminded him so much of his nephew.
Putting it all to the back of his mind, he pulled them both into a tight hug, the three of them holding each other properly for the first time in nearly six years. Strangely, the world seemed just a little brighter now.
***
Abe sat sprawled in the chair, his head fallen back in impatience. Sam laughed at him, Abe's eyes wandering to him.
"What is takin' em so long?" groaned Abe.
Hollywood patted him on the back from behind. "The ladies ain't goin' nowhere ya dumb Hick," he reminded him.
Abe was so eager to get away. July was in full swing and it was entirely sweltering. Elli hated having to be cooped up indoors, so he had promised to go to the river with them and help her with her swimming.
"It's too fuckin' hot to be sat out here waitin' for em," Abe said irritably.
Sam raised his eyebrow. "Why are you so grouchy?"
"I reckon it's 'cause Anna is keeping him up all night," teased Hollywood.
"You're just jealous cause you and Heidi are coolin' down," he retorted, Hollywood narrowing his eyes when Sam and Frenchie burst out laughing.
"Had to happen at some point," said Ewie, "otherwise his dick would fall off the rate they were goin' at it."
"Very true," agreed Hollywood. "What about you two? Any chilly nights in sight?"
"You know there ain't," said Abe smugly. "Anna and I are end game."
Sam laughed. "Yeah, but come on, even you two have to slow down at some point?"
"You guys are acting like that's all we do!" said Abe. "We only do it four times a week now."
"Four?" said Sam.
"It used to be every night," Abe pointed out. "But the last five or so weeks, we've got into a slightly quieter routine. It's more sustainable." He looked at Sam. "You'll understand one day."
"When you actually stick your dick in something," said Frenchie.
"Yeah, somethin' that ain't your hand," added Hollywood, all of them laughing.
"Knock it off," barked Abe, just as Tread finally came to stand in front of them.
"Right then," said Tread. "I'll be brief guys, as I know you're all wanting to get in the shade. Major Hatcher informed me this morning that we will finally be moving on. We leave for Austria in three weeks. August 1st."
Abe's heart plummeted.
"Just Austria?" asked Hollywood, his own voice a little throaty.
"For now," said Tread, his tone equally serious. "There is still a possibility we will be needed in the Pacific."
All the men were quiet, their bubble burst. They had been here longer than anywhere else. They had settled in for an easy occupation.
Most of them all ended up glancing at Abe. He hated it. They knew what was going through his head.
Tread looked at him too. Abe knew he could see the bitter disappointment. "They'll follow Europe soon... I'm sure of it. Just have faith. When I have more details, I'll let you know. Dismissed."
Many of them got to their feet, some of them slapping Abe on the back as he sat very still, unsure of what to do. Tread came over to him, Abe glancing up.
Tread sighed heavily. "There's talk of introducing a points system. If you have enough points, you'll be discharged."
"And if I don't have enough points?" he asked. "Ain't like I've ever been properly injured."
"Abe, Anna knows that you wouldn't abandon her. She'll be here when this is all over."
"I know she ain't goin' nowhere," Abe said miserably. "I just-" He couldn't finish.
Sam and Hollywood glanced at one another, exchanging a look.
Hollywood cleared his throat and pulled Abe to his feet. "Come on. Let's take a walk, you, me and Sam."
Tread nodded in agreement, and the three men set off.
"Anna will understand," said Sam, almost immediately. "I know it's gonna hurt, but you will be fine."
"I feel like him," spat Abe.
"Fuck off!" spluttered Hollywood. "You're nothing like that dirtbag! You ain't choosin' to leave the girls."
"I don't wanna be away from her," admitted Abe. "I can't stand this... my chest feels so fuckin' tight."
"Your heart is hurting," said Sam. "You're going to miss her. It's understandable."
Abe letting out a long breath. "If I die, what will happen to them?"
"Jesus Abe," said Hollywood. "You ain't gonna die!"
"If we get sent to the Pacific, I might," Abe countered, both of them unable to deny it. "And then what happens to the two of them?"
"You can't think like that," said Sam.
"I've gotta take responsibility for this!" urged Abe. "I can't leave them alone in this world. I can't!"
"So propose," said Hollywood, the three of them stopping in their tracks.
Abe stared at him, Hollywood staring back. "I know you wanted it to be a big romantic moment. You ain't shut up about it for the last month. But you're right. You might not have time on your side. So don't waste the time that you do have. Seize the opportunity and show her how much you love her. She'd have the option of America then, and Elli would be your kid."
There was a stunned silence.
"I agree," said Sam. "Abe, she's the only woman you've ever been like this with. Not to mention Elli... Go and ask Tread for his permission to marry. And then go and ask her."
Abe looked at both of them, nodding, and turned to walk away. Then he reconsidered. He pulled them both into a tight hug, thumping their backs.
"Steady there, fella," laughed Hollywood, but Abe had already turned and darted off.
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