Hans stood on the patio, looking out at the loch below. Daniel's house was entirely impressive, set on many acres of land which happened to back onto a loch. Hans closed his eyes, enjoying the biting, January breeze.

Daniel had returned just before Christmas and had been inviting them over every day since. Hans kept declining, even after Klara and Kai had accepted. Finally, his friend had managed to drag him over. Hans knew that Klara must have told Daniel how worried she was about him, and Daniel would do anything to brighten her day. They were already thick as thieves, and it had barely been a month since they had reunited. She maintained she was simply practicing her English, but Hans was no fool.

Daniel heralded him inside, and Hans did as he was bid, closing the patio door behind him. He removed his coat, hanging it on the coat stand. The fire was crackling away, the snug warm and inviting. He went and stood beside Daniel who passed him an ornate glass of whiskey.

Hans accepted it, eyeing it up. "Still couldn't get your hands on any cognac then?" sighed Hans, taking a sip, Daniel laughing throatily.

"Afraid not old boy," he said, "you'll have to put up with this perfectly aged single malt."

Hans smiled at his friend, then went back to looking out of the window at the scenery. "I see why you stayed up here after school. What is London compared to all of this?"

"My thoughts exactly," said Daniel, ushering him to the leather arm chairs in front of the fireplace. "Perhaps we could go hunting when the season begins?" offered Daniel. "There is always a plethora of pheasants to be had."

"That would be nice, thank you," replied Hans.

Daniel sighed heavily. "Klara is right. You really are not yourself."

Hans shot him a look. "I'm perfectly fine," mumbled Hans.

"No, you're not. You look dismal, Hans. I have never seen you like this. Not even when you came here after Ursula-"

"Please do not bring her into this."

"Do you want me to simply ignore the fact that you are wasting away here?" he asked, his words biting. "You look gaunt. After you discovered what Ursula had done you were so angry... there was still life in you. But this..." He trailed off, sucking in a breath.

"That's probably because I didn't really care about Ursula," Hans pointed out calmly, taking another sip on his drink. "And because the break-down of that relationship was not my fault."

"Hans, you cannot beat yourself up over your mistake forever. Anna has clearly moved on, old friend. You need to as well."

"How do I know if she has?" asked Hans, his voice wavering. "I never spoke to her... I have no idea what their plans were... I don't even know where she is now."

"I do." ventured Daniel.

Hans eyes widened. "You do?!"

"Yes."

"Then why the hell haven't you said anything?"

"Because until now, I wasn't sure that it would help you!" explained Daniel. "But hopefully now, you can set your mind at ease."

"At ease?"

"Anna married the American fellow back in July," he said.

"She did?" he managed, his heart pounding in his chest.

Daniel nodded. "He then went on to serve in Austria for a month or so when he was discharged. He returned to her, adopted the child and they left for America in November."

Hans was stunned, breathing heavily. "How on earth do you know all of this?" he asked in barely a whisper.

"Klara rang me," he said, Hans supressing an eye roll. "She was worried about you Hans! And so was I. So I rang that chap Hatcher, the one who had you detained. He put me through to a Lieutenant Whiting, who told me in no uncertain terms that Anna was very happy, and I was never to ask after her again."

"Did you tell this man that I was alive?"

"No. I know you didn't want her to know. I said I was trying to follow up with her in case I needed her help identifying members of the SS who were working at the camp. She seems very well protected, that much is certain."

Hans set down his drink, leaning forward and burying his face in his hands. He should be pleased, shouldn't he? She was safe... and happy. Why did it hurt more to know that he had been right about the way she had looked at this man?

"She lives in Missouri now," continued Daniel, "near Charleston."

"I have no idea where that is," mumbled Hans.

"But I'm sure you could find it, should you feel the need."

Hans looked at him, Daniel's face filled with sympathy. "It wouldn't be fair to do that to her," sighed Hans. "Did you find out anything else about this man?"

"Hatcher said that he was First Sergeant of his company and was a respected combat leader. He described him as a 'hell of a man'."

"I suppose that's good." There was a long pause, Hans taking it all in.

"Hans, she's happy. Genuinely happy. I know it's not the same as you having a life with her, but can't you be content in the knowledge that your selfless actions have led to a better life for her? This Abraham fellow clearly adores her and the young girl."

Hans didn't respond for a while, mulling over what to say in return. "Thank you for finding all of this out," he said eventually, getting to his feet. "Do you mind if I take a walk around the grounds?"

"Be my guest," said Daniel hurriedly, Hans grabbing his coat and tugging it on.

Hans made to leave, but then stopped. He turned back to Daniel. "You truly are an amazing friend, Daniel," he said, Daniel smiling a little. "I'm glad that you and Klara are getting along so well."

"Yes, about that-" he began.

Hans held his hand up. "Whatever is happening between you is nothing to do with me. As long as you are both happy, that is all I need care about." Daniel seemed truly relieved, Hans nodding to him before he began his walk in the cold. He needed space to think.

He headed down the sloping grass bank to the loch, hoping the sound of the lapping water would soothe him. The stones crunched under his feet as he reached the shore, his gaze turned wistfully to the large expanse of water ahead.

Anna was safe... truly safe.

And happy.

How he wished he could see her. He had the image of her smile painted in his mind so clearly, but it would never compare to the reality. He should have gone to say goodbye. Why did he have to be such a coward again? If only he had done it for the reasons he'd told his family... that he didn't want to confuse her.

The truth was far more selfish.

He simply couldn't stand to see her in love with someone else. He had travelled the length of Germany telling himself that they would be reunited... that he would have her in his arms again and truly prove to her how much she meant to him. He shouldn't have been so foolish as to hinge everything on that. But his final decision to leave her in Berchtesgaden had paid off.

This was closure now, for both of them. He didn't have to wonder if she was out there, somewhere, wishing she was with him instead. He knew that her heart was not his anymore.

Closing his eyes tightly, he held in the tears. He would always be grateful for the time he'd had with her. Without that little glimpse into her world, he would never have known true happiness. Some people never found that at all.

But it was time to move on.

Hans would always love Anna... that would never change. He knew he would go on loving her until the day he died. But pining after someone that was not his was just foolish.

Staring at the peaty water, he mustered the courage to speak aloud.

"Thank you," he began, his voice throaty. "Thank you for loving me when I didn't deserve it." His head hung low for a moment, the wind whipping around him as he carried on. "I'm sorry for losing you. And our daughter. I would give anything to have you here with me now, like we'd planned." He chuckled a little, opening his eyes. The sound was alien. "You would love it here. All it does is rain. Every day I imagine you and our little girl going out for a walk, coming back with you hair soaking wet, your boots caked in mud." He sniffed, tears stinging his frozen cheeks. "I wish I'd known you in your freedom. That one small glimpse was..." He trailed off.

Magical. Heavenly. The most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Why couldn't he say that out loud?

Hans cleared his throat. "You will always have my heart, Anna."

He drew in a long breath, wiping his cheeks with the heel of his hand.

No more. This had to end.

With a new found serenity, he turned, and trudged back up the bank towards the new life that he had been avoiding all these long months.

***

Christmas had been a wonderful time for the family. Vera, Dick and the boys had all come to stay, Elli so happy to have children to play with again. The girls adored their new family. They didn't have much, but whatever they did, they shared.

This was how Anna had always imagined Christmas... or at least, this is how Karl and Helga had made it seem. She certainly felt the sting of his absence because of it. Freddie's too. At least she was surrounded by love and acceptance. It was the greatest feeling in the world.

January and February passed them by without so much as a backward glance. Abe, being the determined stubborn man that he was, had already begun work on the house foundations by the middle of January. Aaron came and helped him where he could, but he was often needed at the store to help his Grandmother.

Anna had gone in his place a few times, and she certainly enjoyed her days talking to Mrs Balsiger. She learned that she had taken Aaron in when his parents had died in an automobile accident when he was young. Abe had been very helpful around this time. He was a good few years older than Aaron but took him under his wing as best he could the older he got.

Anna would have happily worked there full time, but she was also helping Ma with the farm, and carrying on with Elli's education. She hadn't pushed it all the time they were in Germany, but she knew how far behind Elli would be. Abe had suggested putting her straight into school, but Anna wanted her to acclimatise to America first.

As spring arrived and March ended, Abe had made excellent headway on the house. Anna enjoyed seeing how it was coming to life every time she came and brought him his lunch. He was always grateful for the gesture, but her cooking still needed a lot of work. He tried his best to smile through her practice meals, but Anna knew he was humouring her. She was determined to get better... he was building her a house after all, how hard could cooking a good dinner be?

Their life was idyllic in so many ways... save one.

Anna was so keen to try for another baby. Or at least stop using protection. But Abe wouldn't let up. He was so shaken by their loss before that he wouldn't entertain the idea at all. He couldn't stand to see Anna hurt again. They were avoiding the issue altogether at the moment.

Abe insisted he had plans for Anna's birthday to focus on instead. He hadn't told her where they were going, but it was just the two of them, and it was getting dark. She was tucked under his arm as they drove, Anna babbling excitedly about everything and nothing as the truck drove further into nowhere. He finally pulled over, grinning at her as she looked around curiously.

They weren't too far from the house... if anything, Anna was certain they could have walked it in an hour. But Abe had insisted that they needed the truck.

"There's nothing here?" she stated.

Abe laughed. "That's the point." He jumped out of the cab, helping her down too. Pulling the cover off the back of the truck, Anna now seeing blankets laid out in the back. Abe slapped the side of the truck. "Ever since I bought this hunk of junk, I used to drive out to this point, and look up at the stars. It's just fields here... you can listen to the grass and the crickets cause their ain't nothin' else for miles. I always came here when I needed to get away from stuff, and I guess I wanted to share this with you."

She smiled at him, her hands resting on his chest. "This is perfect," she said, kissing him tenderly.

"Come on," he whispered, pulling her towards the back.

Abe climbed into the back of the truck, then lent down and hoisted Anna up, immediately lying back with her so that she lay across his chest. They lay cuddled together, looking up at the starry sky, listening to the wind rustling through the grass and trees.

"So, tell me," she asked teasingly, "how many girls did you do this with?"

"Oh, I see how it is! You think I put my best moves on every girl?"

"It works very well. It's an incredibly romantic setting."

"I've actually never done this with any girl," he admitted, kissing her nose. "I always came here for some peace. All the girls I had dated were nice enough, but I never felt that close to any of 'em. This is something very private, you know?"

"Are you sure you want me here, then?"

"I want you with me at all times," he emphasised. She snuggled into her jacket, Abe's arms wrapping tighter around her. "I can't believe it's been nearly a year since we met."

"I know... so much has happened."

"It's been the best year of my life," he murmured, his hand rubbing her back.

"Mine too," she agreed. "But I feel like this coming year will be even better."

"Me too."

There was a contented silence, Anna admiring how beautiful the night's sky was. "This is a lovely birthday surprise."

"I'm sorry I don't have enough for a proper present-"

"Abraham, you are building us a house! You have literally given me everything I could ever want or need. This is perfect." She lent up and kissed him, Abe responding happily. He made to stop, but she kept kissing him, the mood changing very quickly. She rolled back, their fingers lacing together as he slipped between her legs.

"Baby," he murmured against her lips, "it's freezing out here-"

"Don't worry, you keep me warm enough," she replied, now undoing his jacket so that she could have him even closer to her. He rolled them over, sitting up as her legs slid either side of his waist. She shrugged off her coat, kissing him eagerly as he undid her buttons. His hand slipped into her open trousers, Anna gasping as his fingers teased her. He kissed her throat, Anna's fingers knotting into his hair as she moaned into his ear.

"I want you," she managed.

"You got me," he grinned, kissing her on the mouth.

"No, fully."

"We didn't bring protection. So let's just focus on you for now."

"We don't need protection," she insisted.

He stopped, sighing as he pulled back a little. "Anna baby," he said gently, his hands now resting on her waist. "We talked about this-"

"I'm not suggesting that we avidly try for a child. I'm simply saying, let's see what happens."

"You were so unwell the last time," he said, his voice thick. "I don't want you to go through all that again."

"So, we're just never going to have a baby?" she asked.

Abe's jaw was clenched. "Believe me," he urged, cupping her cheek, "I would love nothing more than to have a child with you. But that German Doctor said it's too much for you! You might never be able to carry a child full term. I'm not putting you in danger for anything in the world."

"It's not putting me in danger."

"What about in your heart? I can't see you go through that again."

"But I want to try, Abe," she insisted. "Can't we simply see what happens?"

There was a long pause.

"Anna, I'm scared," he admitted, Anna sighing frustratedly.

"I'm not," she assured him. "Please, Abe. I promise you, if it happens again, then I'll stop asking."

He groaned. "Why do you have to be so good at arguin'?"

"Because this makes sense."

"The most I'll give you right now is a maybe, okay?"

Anna looked disappointed.

"I need time to think 'bout it. Would you wanna be with a man that just gave in without thinkin' 'bout things?"

"Now who's good at arguing?" she retorted, Abe giving a small smile. "If you don't want to, I shouldn't pressure you. It's not fair."

"It's not that I don't want to. But sometimes, what we want, and what's best ain't the same thing. And I'm tryna do what's right... the way you taught me to."

She sniffed as Abe kissed her nose and wiped away the tears that were falling. "It's not fair," she whispered. "We deserve a full life-"

"And we have one, baby. We have each other, we have Elli. We are a family, in every sense of the word." She hugged him tight, Abe holding her in return and rubbing her back. "I promise I'll think long and hard about it. But you can't be sad... it's your birthday."

"I'm not sad," she promised with a sniff, looking at him again. "I have you. How can I be sad when I have you?" That familiar dopey grin spread on his face, Anna unable to stop herself from returning it.

"I love you, Mrs Coleman," he said, his nose brushing hers.

"As I love you, Mr Coleman," she whispered, kissing him with ardour and need. She wished that little pang in her heart would disappear. Here, in his arms, it had no place at all.

***

Another month had passed, Elli's birthday over as quickly as it had begun. Everyone had thoroughly spoilt her again, Ma making her the biggest spread of food the world had ever seen. Elli had loved sharing it with her cousins who had come over for it especially. She was so happy that her birthdays seemed to get better and better each year.

It was a warm May afternoon, only a day or so before Abe's birthday. He was turning thirty seven, and that thought had sent him into a frenzy with the house. He desperately wanted to get it finished and for him and the girls to move in. Anna was taking a break from Elli's studies. She had agreed to begin attending proper school in September, and Anna had been working her hard to get her prepared. Anna hummed to herself as she carried on with the washing up, thinking about their new house. She was so excited for it to be finished but was also very nervous. At the moment, she had Ma to help guide her through all of the cooking, but soon she'd be taking charge of her own kitchen. There was a sudden knock on the window, Abe grinning at her and waving before he came through the side door.

"You gave me such a fright!" she chastised, clutching her heart as he grinned and came over to her.

"Didn't mean to," he said, taking her in his arms and kissing her. "Where is everybody?"

"Ma took Elli to town. She thinks we need a break from our studies."

"Well..." began Abe, clearly agreeing with his mother, but Anna shot him a look. "Darlin', she is gonna be fine. I told you, the folks round here ain't that educated. She'll easily be top of her class."

"I just want her to be prepared."

"I know you do," he hushed, kissing her neck tenderly.

"How come you're finished so early?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Because I wanted to show you how it's shaping up!" he said, Anna's eyes lighting up. "All it needs is paint... everything else is finished."

"Really?" she said gleefully, nearly jumping up and down.

"Yeah, come on. I'll show you," he said, just about letting her to set her cloth down before he pulled her outside.

They walked hand in hand down the path, chatting excitedly about their future home. She hadn't been inside it for a fair few weeks, so she was eager to see the transformation. As they reached it, she felt tears in her eyes.

"Baby," he cooed, noticing her wipe them away, "you ain't even been inside yet."

"I know, but you know how much this means to me."

"Let me give you the grand tour," he laughed, tugging her inside.

They stepped through the front door, Anna looking around in awe. It was exactly the same as his mother's house, except that there was an archway through to the kitchen. It made it feel light and airy, just how Anna had dreamed it would.

He stood behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and speaking softly in her ear. "I thought we could get you a piano for the corner there," he said, pointing at the corner in question.

"Oh Abe," she whispered, but he was pulling her upstairs.

"We ain't done yet," he said, leading her up the stairs.

They went down the landing, Abe showing her their little bathroom, bedroom and Elli's room, Anna more delighted with each new room he took her to.

"There's one more thing though," he said, taking her to the final room on the landing.

He opened it, Anna's breath caught in her throat. It was a similar size to Elli's, but in the middle was a large wooden crib.

"Where did you get that?" she asked, her eyes brimming with tears again.

"I made it," he said, Anna turning to look at him. He took her hands in his, kissing her finger tips. "I've been thinking about what you said, and honestly I couldn't get it out of my mind. I started making this before I even realised what I was doing." He sighed heavily, pulling her into his embrace. "I think I want a baby just as much as you," he whispered, "but I'm still worried about you-"

"But, does this mean you want to try?" she asked enthusiastically.

"Only if you promise me that we look after you first," he urged. "I can't lose you baby, not for anything."

"I promise, we'll be careful," she said. She reached up on her toes and kissed him, her arms winding around his neck as they both got carried away in one another. "If you keep kissing me like that," she teased, "we will have to go back to Ma's."

"How about," he murmured against her lips, "we christen the new house instead?"

"There's no bed," she pointed out.

"I'll put my shirt down," he said, kissing her again and running his hands up her legs.

"Such a gentleman," she sighed, but smiled at him.

"Call it an early birthday present for me," he said, that playful grin on his face again.

"Well, if that's how we're viewing it," she said, continuing to kiss him fervently. He picked her up, carrying her through to their empty bedroom. She was already undoing his shirt as they got there, tugging it off him hurriedly. He set it down on the floor, helping Anna to undo her dress as quickly as possible. She pulled him to the floor, eagerly pulling him in as he slipped between her legs.

They spent the next few hours in the house, enjoying the sense of freedom it provided. They hadn't had this much space to themselves in a long time... and besides which, neither of them felt right making love in any room of Ma's house that wasn't theirs. Here, there were no restrictions, and they took full advantage of that fact. They ended up lying in the sitting room, naked and entwined. Abe was dozing off, Anna nudging him.

"Oh, leave me be," he groaned. "I'm getting' old, and you wear me out."

"You're going to be thirty seven," she laughed, "that's not old."

"Fine, then you just wear me out," he mumbled with a smug smile on his face. He sighed contentedly, Anna's face pressed into his chest as he rubbed her back. "How I'm gonna keep my hands off you when Elli's in school is beyond me," he said finally, Anna sitting up a little to look at him.

"You might be bored of me by then," she suggested, Abe's brow furrowed.

"Are you kiddin' me?" he laughed. "You're my world, darlin'. That ain't possible."

She went to say something when they heard footsteps on the veranda. Both of them scrabbled up, Abe pushing Anna behind him. Neither of them had any idea where their clothes were.

"Who is it?" called Abe before anyone could even knock.

"It's Aaron," he called back. "There's no one at Ma's house, so I walked straight down. I came to see if you needed help today," he continued as he began opening the door.

"Wait!" called out Abe, Aaron halting. "Can you give me a minute?"

"Why?" questioned Aaron cautiously.

"Because he's not alone in here," called Anna, Abe shooting her a glare as she giggled. There was a pause, Aaron clearly stifling a laugh himself.

"Sure thing boss," said Aaron. "I'll give you lovebirds a minute." Abe's head fell back, Anna laughing and kissing him as she got up to find their clothes. He followed her upstairs, both of them smiling as they got dressed. When they were fully clothed, Abe took Anna in his arms again, kissing her tenderly.

"Aaron is waiting," she reminded him, Abe smiling.

"I know," he sighed. "I just like being close to you." She kissed him back, holding his hand in hers.

"Shall we do this again tomorrow?" she asked eagerly, Abe grinning from ear to ear.

"Yes please," is all he could manage, both of them laughing as she led him back downstairs, and into reality.