Chapter 13

Two days later, Jocelyne found herself being escorted by two members of the illustrious Sureté de Québec came to escort her home. They were booked on a commercial flight, which boggled her mind, but the government wasn't going to spring for a private flight and Jocelyne was too embarrassed to ask her father to furnish one.

So she sat in the departures area of the Vancouver airport, waiting and dreading at the same time. She was still mulling over Colton's words when she blinked. No, she wasn't seeing things. Colton was striding over to her. She tried to rise and had two very strong arms push her back in the chair. One of the Sureté spotted Colton and rose, holding out a hand. The RCMP officer flicked open his credentials which were scrutinized carefully.

"Give me five minutes with her?"

The burlier of the two officers nodded and both men stepped away. All of two feet away. So much for privacy, Jocelyne thought uncharitably as Colton sat next to her. He opened his phone and scrolled to a picture, holding it for her to see.

Jocelyne gasped and her fingers flew to her lips. "So tiny," she whispered.

"And so perfect," he added. "Well, actually he was born addicted to Oxy, but the doctors tell me they can treat that."

She nodded as he scrolled to the next photo. Ten little fingers and ten little toes.

"I spoke to his doctor and he told me you saved the baby's life. Given the time it would have taken to get him to the hospital, he probably would have died." He pocketed his phone. "And the guard has been put on administrative leave until there's a hearing. Despite your current situation, your report will carry a lot of weight. You didn't have to do that."

Jocelyne snorted. "I wrote it on toilet paper."

Colton shrugged, "still, you got it to your legal aid attorney."

"I'm sorry I had to go to legal aid, but I don't actually have any money. It was all for show anyway because he knew I wasn't going to fight extradition. He's a good man, though."

"Nick Clarke? Well, he's a lawyer."

High praise, coming from Colton.

Tentatively, Jocelyne placed her cuffed hands on Colton's arm. The jangling of metal got her a nasty look from one of the other cops, but then he looked away.

"Thank you for bringing those photos. You'll never know what it meant to me."

He looked at her thoughtfully. "I didn't tell him, but I think you should."

Involuntarily, her hands tightened on his arm. "I'm not strong enough to do that. I'm going to do the plea bargain and do my time. Whatever happens after that is up to the fates."

"You mean like God?"

She shook her head. "No, I mean the fates. I think this was all predestined."

"I would call bull, but that kind of language might get me in trouble with the other guys." He did place his hand on hers. "He would wait if you asked."

"I know, he would which is why I can't. He needs to have a life and I'm his past, not his future."

"I think you two are two of the most stubborn and obstinate people I've ever met and you deserve each other, but no one's asking my opinion." He squeezed her hand. "You're also two very important people to me so I'll sit back and watch you both make a hash out of your lives while doing nothing but be supportive. I've had my say with the two of you and there's nothing more I can do."

She was important to him?

It went both ways, she supposed. She felt an odd connection to this enigmatic man. Would he ever open himself up and accept love?

Colton Pritchard and love?

Too fanciful.

Then there was an announcement for her flight and Jocelyne let Colton help her rise. She should be used to the handcuffs, but they still caught her off-balance at times. Once she was upright, she looked into Colton's eyes. "Take care of him for me."

"Same to you, Jocelyne." He gave her a smile. "Consider Beautiful British Columbia once you're finished your stint in jail." With a wink, he was gone.

Beefy and Burly were immediately at her side. She took one last look at Colton's retreating figure and allowed herself to be led on to the plane.

"Did you see this?"

Seth ignored Colton and continued to peck away at his computer, writing his report. Mrs. O'Reilly had come all the way down to the detachment, in a cab no less, to complain about the bag of dog excrement which had been left on her front porch. She had even brought the incriminating evidence with her, demanding the bag be dusted for prints and the contents be tested for DNA. It had taken an entire can of Febreeze to rid the lobby of the scent. Seth had personally paid for Mrs. O'Reilly's cab ride home after extracting a promise she not bring evidence down to the detachment again.

The evidence was now in a dumpster out back and Seth was trying how to tactfully write that the woman had one or two screws loose. Since she called them at least once a month, he wasn't sure tact was of the highest order.

He was right in the middle of a thought when a newspaper landed on his keyboard and nearly knocked over his coffee mug. He pushed his chair back from his desk and sprung to his feet.

"Damn it, Colton, what the hell do you think you're doing?" His hazel eyes were blazing when they settled on Colton's.

"I asked if you had seen that?" He pointed to the newspaper which Seth didn't even look at it.

"What's your problem?" He spat out the words, knowing even as he said them that he was being irrational.

Colton raised an eyebrow. "You want to take a shot at me?"

At that precise moment, that was exactly what Seth wanted to do. He wanted to punch something. He wanted to hit something. He wanted to yell in frustration. Knowing his anger was misdirected, he dropped back into his chair and grabbed the newspaper.

"So what was so damn important...?" He took a sharp breath. "Oh."

"Yeah, that was what I thought. She looks good."

She did look good. Her eyes were bright and clear blue which came through despite the graininess of the paper. She was wearing her hair up, but that wasn't a big surprise. She was looking right in the camera as she was being led into court. No ducking or evading like some perps. No, Doctor Jocelyne Baldwin had a look of determination on that beautiful face.

It was a look he knew well.

He dropped the paper.

"Aren't you even going to read the article?"

"Why would I?"

"Because it's a good piece of journalism. It makes a cogent and persuasive case about why your girlfriend should be set free. It lays out the facts of the case." Colton let out a huff of frustration. "It answers all the questions you've been too stubborn to ask."

Seth seethed. "I haven't yet decided that I don't want to take a swing at you."

They would be just about evenly matched, Seth thought, now that he was healed. One more week of riding a desk and then he'd be back in his cruiser. Well, obviously a new cruiser, but he would be back on the streets where he belonged. He had no idea, however, who his new partner was going to be. Maybe he would be solo for a while, but probably not. Greg liked teams of two.

Maybe he could coax Dorrie away from Colton.

But that would leave chaos in its wake and no one would forgive him.

So he went back to henpecking his report, wishing he'd had the foresight to take a typing class.

His mind wasn't on the report and as soon as he was sure Colton was gone, he reached for the paper.

Each word just pushed the knife in a little bit deeper. He had known she wasn't capable of killing someone, but he had condemned her without letting her have her say. He had sent her away and he hadn't even gone to see her in jail before she had been extradited. When he had heard about her saving Angela Samson and her baby boy, he hadn't been surprised. Despite himself, he had been proud.

Then he had tried to excise her from his life and now he felt like he was only half a person. Mac and Charley were still giving him the evil eye, as if they blamed him for her going. Their daily routine had included greeting her when she came home after a day of work. His routine had been much the same. Now he was back to working four days of twelve hour shifts and then having four days off. It was the days off that were killing him. He'd already taken his nephew and each of his nieces for a special day. He wanted to cycle around again, but his siblings had put their collective foot down and warned him that he was going to spoil the kids.

His day with Roxie had been both the hardest and the most poignant. She had asked him to take her to the cemetery because she'd known her parents would never have agreed to it. She'd sat by the Eagan brothers' grave and talked about her good memories. She'd known them for as long as she could remember and there had been lots of good times. She'd wanted to hold on to those memories and his ability to offer unspoken support had been a balm for her. Of course he'd later told Nancy and Blaine, but they had understood and been grateful.

He brought his focus back to the article and read it through a second time. She was brave, his Jocelyne. She had made it clear that she was willing to go to jail, but the judge wanted clarity on the issue before he accepted the plea bargain and handed down sentence.

Seth was putting down the national paper when a sheet dropped from the fold. Curiosity piqued, he picked up the sheet. It was a printout of an article in a local Québec paper.

Prominent Surgeon Charged With Two Counts of Sexual Assault.

He dropped the paper and picked up the phone.

"You know you didn't have to come with me."

"Oh, so I should just let my sister move across the country by herself? God, Jossie, you've been saying the same thing for four thousand five hundred kilometres. Quite honestly, I'm tired of it."

Trust Chantale to say just the right thing. Jocelyne hated being called Jossie almost as much as she hated being called Mrs. Morin. Well, divorce papers had rid her of that problem. Now Morris was facing ten years in prison for the two nurses he had raped while Jocelyne had been hiding in Mission City. Another three women had also come forward with similar accusations. Chantale had wanted her to press additional charges, but Jocelyne had just been glad to rid herself of the whole marriage thing.

Nothing wrong with being single.

Or so she kept telling herself.

She had handpicked a few things which were of sentimental value, donated all those fancy clothes to charity, and walked out of the Westmount house without a backward glance. Now that she had access to her own bank accounts, she had bought a nice mid-range SUV and had decided she was going to drive across the country. This time she had planned to do it as a tourist and not a fugitive.

Chantale had gotten it in her head that it might be dangerous for a single woman to make the trek on her own and decided Jocelyne might just need company.

What had seemed like a good idea five provinces ago was beginning to wear a little thin. Amazing that two sisters in their thirties could find so much to quibble about. Yet most of the time Jocelyne held her tongue. Chantale had been her legal counsel in the court case and Chantale had been the one to convince the prosecutor to drop the charges once it was discovered that the post-mortem had been conducted by a very good friend of Morris' and that the man had admitted to falsifying some of the findings after his palms had been greased.

It didn't exonerate Jocelyne, but the Crown had withdrawn the charges and the College of Physicians and Surgeons had terminated revocation proceedings as well. Jocelyne was still a doctor, but staying in Québec hadn't really been an option. Her face had been plastered across the papers for weeks as the debate had raged on. She had become the unwitting poster girl for the right to die with dignity movement. The national coverage had been limited - or so Chantale had promised - so Jocelyne had decided to head west. She would have to get her credentials recognized in British Columbia once she was settled, but that was more a formality. Within a month or two she could be practicing medicine again.

Somewhere in the back of the SUV was a box of medical journals waiting to be read.

"Uh, Jossie?"

"Yes Chantale."

"There's a guy on the road waving."

Her heart leapt into her throat. She would have sworn she wasn't speeding, but there was a cop in the road indicating she should pull over. No way was this happening she thought. Not twice in the same damn place. She had honestly believed she could just drive through Mission City without incident.

Fat chance now.

As she pulled onto the shoulder she did some quick thinking. Maybe she could drop Frank's name. Just a casual 'how's Frank doing'? Why was she asking? Oh, she had been the one to save his life.

Entirely too manipulative.

As she put the truck in park and killed the engine, she got a really good look at the cop.

No, she thought frantically, no way were the fates that cruel.

"He's cute," Chantale observed.

"Just shut up," Jocelyne hissed as she rolled down her window. She held herself still and tried to calm her heart when he stepped to the truck.

"Licence and registration."

So that was how it was going to be.

Jocelyne dug into her wallet for her licence and Chantale very helpfully handed over the registration papers. She handed over the requisite documents and watched his hands as he thumbed through them. She remembered what those hands had felt like on her body. Strong hands. Sure hands. Exquisitely gentle hands.

"I have to check these. I'll be right back." He strode away.

Just stay calm, she told herself. Just stay in the vehicle. Just remain calm and in the vehicle.

Oh to hell with that.

She remembered to check her side mirror before she leapt from the truck.

"Hey!"

He turned and her heart stuttered. He was wearing sunglasses, but she knew the exact shade of hazel being hidden beneath tinted frames.

"Damn it, Jocelyne, you're supposed to stay in the car."

Seth's face was naked panic and Jocelyne spun, expecting to see and oncoming truck. There was no one. The highway was empty. Eerily empty. Then she heard two car doors open. Chantale stepped out of the SUV and Colton stepped from the truck. Both advanced as Jocelyne looked wildly around her. Something was really wrong.

Yet suddenly there were four of them standing on the side of the highway with cars whizzing by.

"Counsellor."

"Corporal."

Jocelyne gaped and reached for her sister's arm even as her eyes narrowed. "How do you know each other?"

Ignoring her sister, Chantale smiled. "Can I give you a ride?"

Jocelyne goggled. Her sister was offering Colton Pritchard a ride. She looked again more closely. Her sister was flirting with Colton Pritchard.

"I would love a ride." He offered his arm and Chantale took it. Jocelyne was too stunned to move as the pair moved towards her SUV. Mouth agape, she watched as Chantale took the driver's seat and Colton took the passenger seat. Her sister gave a quick little wave and then pulled out into traffic.

Leaving Jocelyne on the side of the road with Seth.

"Did you know they were going to do that?"

He shook his head.

"Then how did this all happen?"

He shrugged and they were almost knocked off their feet by a speeding transport truck.

"If I were on duty, I'd give him a ticket."

"Wait, what?" She looked at him for the first time. Really looked. He wasn't in uniform. How she had missed that little tidbit was quite beyond her. "If you're not on duty then why did you pull me over?"

He shifted uncomfortably and another truck rumbled by, drowning out any response he might make. "Look, as you well know, this isn't a safe place to have a conversation. Get in the truck and we'll go somewhere."

"No way," she said, having to shout to be heard over yet another truck. "Not until you tell me why you pulled me over."

He looked like he wanted to argue. He looked like he just wanted to drag her off by the elbow. He looked like he wanted to kiss her.

She gave her head a quick mental shake. She had that backwards. She wanted to kiss him. All she wanted to do was throw her arms around him and kiss him senseless.

He gave a grunt. "Colton told me he's been looking for a perp who likes to troll this area and pick-up hitchhiking teenagers. Girls, boys, the guy doesn't care." Seth's expression turned dark. "He holds the kids in the car and forces them to watch while he masturbates."

Jocelyne cringed.

"Colton told me he didn't want the guy to know he was on to him so he needed me to do a routine traffic stop."

"But if you're off duty..."

"Oh, stuff it, Doc, I thought I was doing Colton a favour. I had no idea what was going on until he told me to pull over your truck." He paused. "Nice SUV, by the way. How does it drive?"

Not given to violent urges, Jocelyne gave in just this once and punched him in the arm.

"Ouch, that hurt."

Her eyes widened. "It still hurts? After all this time?" She was already reaching for the shoulder, feeling tendons and muscles, trying to find the problem.

He reached for her hands, trying to still them. "It was a joke, Doc. I was joking. I've been back on active duty for almost a month."

Now her eyes blazed fury. "That wasn't funny." She gestured wildly. "This isn't funny either."

He made a reach for her hands and snagged them. She started to struggle, but then her breath hitched. He reached up to push his sunglasses to the top of his head and she was able to see his eyes. What she saw had her reaching for him.

It wasn't just a physical collision, it was a mental one as well. Then emotions were thrown into the mix.

Her hands went around his neck and his encircled her waist. Eyes still locked, they moved closer. Then Seth pulled her close enough to slant his mouth over hers. There was no gentleness. It was rough, it was punishing, and it was exactly what she needed. She'd been asleep since she'd left Mission City and now he was awakening her with each touch. She was awake and she was hungry.

His tongue mated with hers as he plundered. He nipped her lower lip as he pulled her even closer.

"Get a room!"

Jocelyne pushed away from Seth, shocked by the amused outcry from a passing motorist. She was standing on the side of the highway being groped by a Mountie and all she wanted was to drag him into the bushes and have her way with him. What the hell was she thinking?

That it had been too long. Too damn long since he had been with her. Too damn long since she had been over him and too damn long since he had been inside of her.

Her breathing was coming in ragged gasps and so was his. He looked just as staggered as she felt and bewilderment passed between the two of them.

"Come with me, Jocelyne, please. We can't stay out here and I can't leave you alone."

"What about Chantale?"

"You sister's safe with Colton. You can use my cellphone to call him if you're worried."

Was she worried? Not precisely. She was pissed and if she spoke to Chantale right now she would probably say some very nasty things to the woman. The woman who had secured her freedom. The woman to whom she owed her life. Was she worried? Hell no. If she had any concerns it was whether Colton could handle Chantale. Her sister was quite a spitfire.

So she took Seth's outstretched hand and let herself be guided back to his truck.

Seth was pleased to see his hand was steady when he turned the key in the ignition. When Colton had pointed to the SUV, Seth had gotten that little jolt which came from being a cop. When he had seen the Québec licence plate, he'd had a moment of déjà vu. When he'd realized it was Jocelyne behind the wheel he'd been ready to throttle his friend.

By that point, he was committed to the traffic stop.

It would be a long time before he either forgave Colton or did the man another favour. They both could have gotten in a lot of trouble. Except all it was just one motorist flagging down another one. If he and Jocelyne had thought it was a real traffic stop, then that was on them.

Seth now wanted to meet the infamous Chantale. He'd glimpsed the same height and trim figure. Her hair was brown, but he would have recognized eyes that shade of blue anywhere. It was a blue that haunted his dreams.

"Where are we going?"

"Home," he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Think again, Constable. Take me to the detachment. Take me to Rocko's. Take me to the clinic. Heck, take me to your sister's, but I'm not going back to your place."

He took a breath. "We need to talk and since you're probably going to yell and might throw things, I figure we might as well do it in private."

"I do not throw things," she huffed, but he heard the smile in her voice, so he kept driving. The drive soothed him and gave her time to expend some of her pent-up frustration.

"So how are Mac and Charley?"

"They're good," he said. "They're good," he repeated. "They miss you," he added.

I miss you.

The words were right there, on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn't get them past his lips.

"I've missed them as well." Her voice was soft and her tone wistful.

"Just them?"

He held his breath.

She didn't answer.

Even though there was no one for miles, he used his blinker to signal the turn into his driveway. The cabin came into view in stark relief against the gathering storm clouds. "It's supposed to rain," he said casually, as he killed the ignition.

"Well that's good to know," she said dryly.

"I'm just saying that it's been a wet September. Wetter than usual."

"Must be tough to work on the site."

Instead of answering he undid his seatbelt and opened his door he slipped from the vehicle and then turned back to her. "Your choice whether you come in or not. If you want, I'll call Colton and have him come and get you." He looked up into the sky as the first fat raindrop fell then he looked back at her. "I'm asking you to come in, Doc. Please."

She gave him a long and steady look. Time spun out as more raindrops fell. He would stand naked in the coming storm if she would just say yes.

"I'll come."

Relief flooded through him, so strong it almost brought him to his knees. He closed his door and was rounding the hood when she met him half-way. Their hands met just as the skies opened. So he tugged her towards he cabin, reaching for the key. The rain was coming down hard as they hit the porch. Jocelyne had her hands over her head in an ineffectual effort to keep the water from her eyes. He fumbled with the keys and almost dropped them.

"Oh, sure, now you start locking the door," she said. "Good timing."

He managed to get the door open and reached back to yank her with him. They were laughing as he slammed the door.

The yapping was loud and raucous, but before Jocelyne could stoop down to greet, he pulled her towards the bedroom. They made it in and Seth managed to close the door before the onslaught.

"Seth, I wanted-"

He cut her off by pressing his mouth to hers and the laughter died in her throat. And just like that, the passion from the highway was back, only amplified a hundred-fold in this small room dominated by a huge bed. Yet when he pulled her to him, everything else receded. They were the only two people in the world as his mouth took hers. Her arms came around his neck as she pressed herself to him. The fit was so perfect it was like they had never been apart.

Hands started grabbing. Hers tugging to pull his t-shirt from his jeans while his were freeing her hair from the clip. He tossed it across the room where it landed with a soft thud. He didn't hear it though, for the roaring of blood in his ears. He pulled away from the kiss only long enough to pull the t-shirt over his head. Then he was back, trying to fuse her to him.

His hands shook as he undid the buttons on her blouse and she helped him tug the tails from her jeans then it floated to the floor. Next came respective pairs of jeans. The air had turned the room chilly, but their body heat was beginning to ratchet up the temperature. Seth really wanted to stop and check out the lingerie, but it could wait he decided, as he reached for the clasp of the bra. Jocelyne let it slide to the pile on the floor and Seth took her breasts in his hands. Nipples pebbled and Jocelyne let out a moan of frustration.

Seth chuckled, "tad eager, are we?"

She reached up to take his cheeks in her hands and met his gaze. "Please," she whispered through ragged breaths, "I need this."

So did he. He needed her like he needed oxygen.

He yanked down his briefs, encouraged her to shimmy out of her panties and tumbled them to the bed. Fast and furious was all he was thinking. Slow and steady would come later. And there would be a later. He had her right where he wanted and he intended to keep her there for as long as was humanly possible.

She was already arching under him when he took her breast in his mouth. That same sweet taste was exactly as he had remembered and her moans were as responsive as they had always been. She was good at giving him cues as to what she liked. When his hand slid between her thighs, she parted them, giving him an unspoken invitation. He pressed against her and he began to make little circular motions. Barely any time passed before he felt her climax. It was powerful and Seth had to use his body to keep her from bowing her back.

Her breath was coming in short gasps as he reached blindly for the drawer. When he found the condom, he fought to open the packet. Everything was taking too long as far as he was concerned, but he also knew he couldn't rush the practicalities. No matter how badly he wanted to be in her, this had to take precedence.

Still, as soon as the condom was on, he positioned himself over her. Her eyes opened but were still hazy from her orgasm.

"Now?"

"Yeah, now," he said, as he entered her. Her hands were like vice grips on his shoulders, nails biting into flesh. When he pulled back, she keened. He stopped, wondering if he'd hurt her, but then she flexed her hips to pull him in. He wanted to draw out the pleasure for her, to spin it out, but it wasn't going to happen. Instead, he urged her hips higher to bring them together even closer. He created as much friction as he could as he kept thrusting her.

Then, just before he climaxed, he felt her let go.

They crested the wave at the same time and then landed in the water together.

She knew she was in Seth's arms, but she wasn't even sure she remembered her own name. Had it always been this good or had desperation added an edge to it? Did it even matter? He was a comfortable weight on her and she held him as close as she could.

It was nice, she reflected, to not have to worry about broken ribs and bruised shoulders. If their coupling had been a little frenzied, it was only because they needed to get it out of their systems. Now, everything would go back to the way it was.

Right.

Good in theory, but rather impractical in real life.

He started to pull away, but she pulled him closer.

He nipped at her ear.

"As nice as this is, I need to get rid of the condom."

She laughed and nipped his jaw.

"I love it when you talk dirty to me."

This time when he pulled away, she let him go, because she knew he would be back. He dispensed of the condom and opened the bedroom door. Fur flew and bodies hurled, nearly knocking the wind from her. Mac was nuzzling her hand while Charley was giving her a thorough tongue bath.

She couldn't have been happier.

"I missed you guys too, you know," she said, even as she was making little kissy noises. "I told my sister Chantale all about you. I even showed her pictures..." She trailed off as she realized what she had said. She opened her eyes and found Seth watching her intently.

"And how did you get pictures of my dogs?"

She pulled her lower lip through her teeth. "Nancy might have sent them at Roxie's behest."

He rolled his eyes. "Anything else?"

"Miles sent me a probability study on the odds of getting any conviction overturned and Bettina sent a recipe for chicken lasagne." She squeezed her eyes shut. "And I had weekly emails from Marco which included updates on your medical condition."

"So in other words, you knew everything."

"I was in jail," she said defensively, "I didn't have much else to do except read the mail Chantale got permission to bring." She paused. "How about you? What did you do? Or not do?"

She could tell by the look on his face that he was busted. "One of the guys from my class in Depot transferred to the Sureté and he might have made sure that your husband's case was pursued with due vigour."

"Ex-husband," she corrected.

"Right," he said. His eyes, though, were dark. He whistled and the two dogs leapt from the bed and left the room. He closed the door then walked over to the bed. Unsure of what to expect, Jocelyne scooted over so he could join her and then cuddled with him under the blanket.

He held her to him as he had in the past, with her in the crook of his shoulder and his arm tight around her. She lay her head on his chest, her ear pressed to his heart. It was a slow, steady and healthy beat.

"Why did you lie to me?"

She splayed her hand across his abdomen. "Honestly, Seth, I believed I was divorced. Should I have told you I had an ex-husband? Probably. There were so many half-truths and white lies one more didn't seem like that big of a deal. I kept trying to warn you not to trust me, but you wouldn't listen."

"Are you finished?"

She felt a little chastised. "Yes."

"I asked why you lied to me. I specifically asked you if he raped you and you said no."

"What difference could it possibly have made?" Her eyes were flashing anger.

"It just would have," he said with a bit of force. "Victims of sexual assault..." He took a deep breath. "I would have treated you more gently. Taken more time. Spent more time building trust."

She pulled back and he let her go. "I wasn't a victim, Seth. At least I didn't know I was one." Now she was the one taking a deep breath. "The thing is, Seth, until I talked to Colton, I honestly didn't understand."

"But you're such a smart woman."

Her smile was a little sad, a little wistful. "Smart? Yes. Knowledgeable about men and women? Not so much." She hesitated, then decided to push through the discomfort. "Of everything Seth, all the lies, evasions, and half-truths, why get stuck on this one?"

She could see her question had taken him aback. He hesitated. "That's a fair question. I guess it goes to the heart of our relationship. It's the cop in me - I want to protect. With you, I felt things I've never felt before."

Pushing herself up, heedless of her nudity, she pulled back from him. His touch was now something she couldn't tolerate. Something she couldn't afford to rely on. He reached for her and she scooted further back. Reading the fear in her eyes, he relented. Then he pushed himself up so that he was sitting up as well.

"You don't want to hear it, do you? You don't want me to say the words."

Terror gripped her. "If you say it then you can't take it back. You put something out there like that and it will change what we have forever."

Heedless of his nudity, he pulled his legs up in front of him, knees bent, and looped his arms casually. "How do you even know what I'm going to say? I might-"

He stopped when her eyes began to fill with tears. He started to move to her, but she held up her hand, stopping him in his tracks.

"I love you, Seth." There, she had said it.

He cocked his head. "You get to say it, but I don't? What if I feel the same way?"

Brushing away the tears, she hiccupped. "I can't explain it, but I know how I feel and it terrifies me. I've never said those words to anyone."

Understanding dawned across his features. "And you think I have? Jocelyne, I've never brought a woman to the house. I've never had a woman lie with me in this bed and I've never told a woman that I love her because I would have been lying." He ran his hand over his cropped hair and let out an exasperated breath. "I do love you. I'm sorry if that scares you because I would never do anything to hurt you." This time it was he who held up a hand to stop her.

"I know I hurt you when I left you here alone to face Colton. When I was unwilling to listen to your side of the story. But you have to believe me when I say that our time apart has been the worst in my life. Ask Colton. Several times we've almost come to blows because I've been a cranky jerk. He's been in your corner since he took you in, by the way. I don't know what you said to him, but it must have been compelling."

An odd feeling was going through her. "I only told him the truth," she said honestly. "He was willing to listen and I needed to talk. All those weeks of holding the truth to my heart, knowing that exposing it to the light of day would be the death knell of what we had. It was killing me, Seth. Each day a bit of me would die and then each night, when I lay in your arms, that bit would be revived."

"Why does love scare you so much?"

"I've only ever loved one other person in my life and that's my sister. What I had with my parents was a need to please, but never any true feelings. Marriage to my ex-husband was an obligation and, after the first night, it was sheer terror. I've been shut off from my emotions almost since I was born. I'm not even sure I love you because what I feel is so foreign to me."

He gave her a small smile. "Do you worry about me? Do you spend a good part of each day wondering how I'm doing? Do you want to call me to share something good that's happened to you? Do you crave the physical contact, all the while knowing the mind is what is really engaged? Do you feel like you'll die if we can't be together?"

Realization washed over her like a tidal wave. Mutely, she nodded.

"That's how I feel, Doc. If that isn't love then I think we're both in trouble." He held out his hand and temptation warred with prudence.

Temptation won out and she pushed herself forward to link her hand with his.

"Will you let me love you, Jocelyne? I don't know why you were on that road - today or all those weeks ago - but maybe it was meant to be."

She ducked her head. "I told Chantale I was moving to Vancouver to get a fresh start, but the truth is I was going to stop in Mission City. I was planning to meet with Owen and Marco. I was planning to meet with Colton. I wanted to see if I could carve out a life here based on the truth and not a house of cards of lies."

"Are you looking at going into practice at the clinic?"

She shook her head. "I'm a surgeon at heart. It's going to take some time before I'm licensed to practice in British Columbia. I just wanted to clear up the paperwork with them. I also wanted to apologize in person."

"Do you need a job?"

Jocelyne grinned. "Actually, I've been saving most of my salary since I started practicing since I was at first living with my parents and then...well, anyway, my investment advisor made some prudent investments. I'm actually quite well off."

He grinned. "So what are you going to do with all that free time?"

"Colton suggested I become a nun."

The grin dropped. "Tell me that you're not thinking about it. I mean what we just did, I don't think that will help you become a novice."

She rolled her eyes. "Probably not. No, organized religion probably isn't the best way for me to go."

He squeezed her hand. "Or you could laze about here and take care of my mutts."

Eyeing him, she squeezed back. "That would be awfully decadent."

"Is that a yes?"

"What would be involved?"

"Before or after the wedding?"

Now she tried to pull her hand back, but he had a firm grip. "I want to marry you, Jocelyne. I want to share my life with you." His look was uncertain. "Tell me you feel the same way, please."

Her heart stuttered at the look of uncertainty on his face. He had lain himself on the line and she had to do the same.

"I know you have a lot of friends and family, but I did the big fancy wedding and hated it. I know it might be different-" She stopped mid-sentence when he propelled himself towards her.

"I don't give a damn about the wedding, Jocelyne, it's the marriage that matters. You name the time and the place. If you want it small then we can go to the courthouse. Or we can go away. My family will understand because all they've ever wanted was for me to be happy and you make me happy." He stopped and looked deeply into her eyes. "Is that a yes?"

With him looking at her like that, how could she possibly refuse?

"Yes, Constable, I'll marry you."

Just like that, the weight which had been holding her down lifted. She hadn't known such happiness was possible. As he took her in his arms, she acknowledged her heart had been his since he had saved her life. It hadn't just been a speeding truck which had been a menace, but her old life as well. He had taught her what really mattered in life.