A/N: Super cute fanart of the whole group :) top left to right: Saeyoung/Seven, V, Jumin, Zen and bottom left to right: Saeran, Yoosung, Jaehee ;) Enjoy the chapter, sorry it took so long :/

Yoosung didn't see Saeran for the rest of the day.

Jaehee was jittery, nervous, worried, and it set the rest of the Cold on edge as well, especially as the training room wasn't open due to the tournament. Because of this, the resistance couldn't practice and had too much extra energy.

On top of that, Vanderwood was out to get medical supplies at a drop point from double-agents inside the wall, so his orderly presence was missing, leaving people verging on chaotic.

This also meant that Yoosung manned the infirmary by himself, and was constantly changing bandages, bringing food to patients, and finding time to study his required medical books from Vanderwood.

The lunchroom was quiet, but they ate a lot, something the kitchen staff called "Stress eating", so Yoosung helped to make food, the boiling hot water pouring over his hands as he washed the dishes, his pale skin turning red. 

Most people just went back to their dorms after dinner, but Yoosung stayed up in the infirmary, trying to read. Thankfully, Vanderwood arrived later that night, at around 11:00, hauling a backpack of medical supplies.

Yoosung slipped away as Vanderwood checked on the patients, heading to his dorm to shower. It was slightly less embarrassing this time, but Yoosung still hid himself.

As he was changing, Yoosung spotted Saeran's clothes in his basket by his bed, and smiled sightly. An excuse to go search for Saeran!

Grinning, Yoosung picked up the clothes, folded them as best he could, and then walked out of the dorm, hair still wet. 

...

Not in his office, not in the kitchen, not in the infirmary sick... Yoosung frowned, shoulders drooping.

The training room? At this hour? Yoosung decided it was worth a try. He walked barefoot down the hallway to the training room, and noticed that it was already set up for the tournament tomorrow. 

And there was Saeran, shirtless, breathing heavy, and angrily heaving his fists at the punching bag. His biceps were flexed and bulging, and his forehead rained sweat. 

His fists hit the leather in deadly succession, every hit sending the bag swinging. Yoosung walked slowly towards Saeran, holding the clothes out like a peace offering. 

"Saeran?" He squeaked.

...

Saeran looked up at the noise and immediately felt his heart plummet.

Yoosung.

"What are you doing here?" 

I'm sorry.

"Why aren't you in bed?"

It's not your fault.

"Give me those."

I shouldn't have.

Yoosung's eyes grew wide, and he hastily passed the clothes forward, confused at Saeran's hostility.

"Saeran? Are you-?"

"Get out of my way. And leave me alone."

I don't want to hurt you.

Heart throbbing, Saeran pushed past Yoosung, exiting the Training Room as fast as he could.

Yoosung stood there, stunned and hurt. What had he done? Saeran had seemed so kind, so open to him earlier. What was this? 

Yoosung shook it off, dismissing it as a bad day, but the feeling of sadness and anger still settled uncomfortably in his stomach.

As Yoosung walked back to the dorm, a kitchen worker called out to him. 

"Newbie! Wanna play darts?" 

Yoosung turned and forced a smile, shaking his head slightly, "No thanks, I'm-"

"Aw come on! One round won't kill your sleep schedule." The warm kitchen light flooded over Yoosung as he hesitantly stepped into the kitchen. That's when he noticed. The picture.

On the far wall, across from his and the group of men, was a large poster. A woman with long blonde hair, smiling sweetly, like sugary poison, and a man next to her, with teal hair and a vague expression. 

Memories hit Yoosung like a brick, and suddenly he couldn't breathe. After all these years... V still looked the same. 

Except, of course, for the dart pinned to his forehead. Yoosung gasped for breath and felt his knees weaken, on the verge of tears. 

He stuttered for an excuse, not forming one in time before stumbling out of the kitchen, running towards his hallway but his foot caught on the leg of a chair and he fell forward, smacking his face on the table, scrambling to get up, and then sprinting to his dorm, tears streaming down his face and breath heaving. 

V. He abandoned me. He left me. 

Yoosung gulped, and tried to catch his breath but suddenly he was underwater and V was there, staring at him with dead eyes, and then there was Saeran too, his sharp words cutting scissor-holes in Yoosung's heart, and everything was dark and foggy, like Yoosung was 8 again and was wandering down Mortem avenue and he saw a Dweller for the first time and everything that was ever good fell out of his being, and it was just dark now. 

The air was thick and his throat closed up, and suddenly Yoosung snapped back, and he inhaled a strangled breath, sweet oxygen brushing into his lungs, making him cough, harder and harder. 

His head hurt and he just wanted to lie down. Everything was too much. Yoosung was thinking about his house again, and his mothers thin face, crazed eyes, and lanky arms reaching out to Yoosung even when he wouldn't approach her, for she smelled like smoke and bad things. 

His father would come home and order Yoosung out of his bed so his mother had a place to sleep instead of the floor. Then his father would leave again, only his smell of coal lingering. 

Yoosung left for work at the palace when he was old enough, leaving his home behind, sending money home every month. His mom wasn't much of a mom, and his dad was hardy there to count, but they were family, and they deserved life just as much as he, a broken, beaten-down teenager did.

Yoosung felt his heartbeat slow, but his tears didn't stop. He cried silently in the hallway, face buried in his hands, shoulders shaking. 

When his tears were only saltwater streaks on his face, Yoosung stumbled into the dorm room and to his bed, ignoring Cylus's worried looks. 

He was fine.

He had to be fine.

But even so,  this time, even the calming scent of Saeran's cologne couldn't sooth Yoosung, and he couldn't smell it anyways.

Yoosung fell into a restless sleep.

A/N: Sorry for the sad chapter (hey hey hey to cheer up, you could read one of my other oneshots :3) Please leave a vote and a comment, lovelies :) I'll update again soon this week!