Variance

/ˈverēəns/

noun

the fact or quality of being different, divergent, or inconsistent

I reached the end of the hallway before loud steps were sounding from behind me. The steps got closer and closer as their long legs were taking longer strides than possible for me. Soon they were behind me and pulling me under their arm and guiding me to the dome rooms.

"Luke-" I began, knowing exactly why he was having this attitude.

"We agreed on something Melissa," his husky voice spoke into my ear as he tilted his head closer to mine.

"And I need to do this," my agitated voice argued back.

Dead silence filled the air around us until we were back at the dome and inside his room.

He closed the door and then began talking, his voice trying to stay calm and succeeding particularly well. "We agreed neither of us would go."

Shivers of fear ran down my back at his menacing tone. I knew he would possibly be mad, but never did I imagine he would get this mad over something so small.

"Luke, I want to help." My voice was soft and slightly broken due to the amount of emotion I was putting behind this.

His hands ran through his hair as he paced the room- something I had noticed he does much too much when he was nervous or stressed. I cowered slightly when a huff emitted from him, scared as to what he would say.

Truth be told, I didn't like to fight. I was one that wanted everything to be peaceful, but when I seemed to do something wrong every moment, it was a bit hard to not fight with Luke, or Luke to fight with no one since I rarely yelled back at him.

"Can't you help from here? Out of harm's way!" he shouted suddenly, his hands fidgeting at his sides in anger.

I looked down, not wanting confrontation and fully understanding why he was mad; however, I was fully committed to making him see the predicament from my point of view.

"You know how I feel about you going on these raids," he calmly stated after moments of silence passing between us.

"I know," I finally spoke up, "but you can't expect me to just stay here all the time."

His fists clenched and unclenched as if my words physically pained him as he allowed them to sink into his mind. My eyes watched close enough to see the tips of his fingers digging into his palms.

"Don't do that," I whispered, walking over to him, taking his hands in mine to stop his involuntary habit.

His blue eyes looked confused at first but then change to understanding as he looked down at our now entwined hands.

"That's why you can't go," he whispered, allowing my fingers to trace the creases and veins traveling along his hand.

"What?" I asked, confused by his statement. My eyes traveled up to meet his as I saw his blue orbs soften before mine.

"The pain in your eyes when I was hurt," he explained. One of his hands come up to my face, cupping it as I leaned into his hold and closed my eyes. "The way you felt, it's ten times worse when I know I could have prevented it."

My eyes flew open at the revelation, connecting with Luke's in the first second they were opened.

"You can't prevent everything," I told him, leaning away from his grip only to stand somehow closer to his tall frame.

His teeth took his lower lip into his mouth as he played with his lip ring in a thoughtful state. I only stood there, staring at his face trying to memorize every part in fear that I would wake and this would all be a dream.

"You know that I'll die trying though," his husky voice rumbled, his arms wrapping around my waist and pulling me into him.

"That's not fair," I retaliated, my arms circling his neck as I bit my bottom lip just as he had done seconds ago.

"Life isn't fair."

"I find that very untrue," I whispered, gaining an amount of confidence I had never before possessed as my lips lightly brushed his. A feeling I had grown familiar with set in over my body as I sighed in content.

"Bad things happen to good people, Lissa. How is that fair?" he asked, his eyes still closed from our very little contact.

"Because I am not a good person, yet I got you. I was blessed with the most perfect person in the world."

His eyes fluttered open at this, meeting mine. Lowering his hands to my thighs, he lifted my body to carry me, setting me on his lap when we reached the bed.

"I'm not perfect," he whispered, his accent lacing the words as I heard the judgement resounding in his voice.

"Could of fooled me."

A smile erupted on his face as he chuckled. I laughed along with him, our foreheads ending up leaning on each others and our eyes looking directly into the other's. Our laughter soon disappeared as our close proximity was realized.

The cool metal of his lip ring came in contact with my plump lips, sending goosebumps and the chills up my arms at an astounding rate. Butterflies erupted in my stomach and I couldn't control my body as it responded to his touch involuntarily.

"And you are a good person Melissa," he murmured, his lips continuing their gentle assault on mine.

"How do you know that?" I asked, pulling away from his kiss.

A frown settled on his face, but he still answered honestly and full-heartedly. "Because of this stupid argument," he stated simply.

"What?" An incredulous look took over my face as I looked down at him through my long hair stringing in front of my face.

"This. The whole argument is all because you have a larger heart than anyone I've ever met." He looked down at our hands, intertwining them tightly together and running his thumb over my knuckles. "While I'm trying to protect you, you do everything to help others. Even if it harms you."

I flushed crimson under his stare and the beautiful words he just spoke. "It's called being kindhearted."

Luke shook his head slightly, a grin lighting up his features. His actions brought a flutter to my heart as I noticed his walls lower slowly before my eyes.

"I understand that it's a new word in your vocabulary since you obviously aren't that," I jokingly said with a smug smile pulling at the corners of my lips.

"You did not just call me self centered," he mocked in a fake offensive tone, opening his mouth wide in shock as he did so.

"And what if I did?" I asked, challenging him to do something.

He muttered something I couldn't detect under his breath before picking me up and twirling me around the room.

Squeals emitted from my lips in surprise and fear. I began to hit Luke's back in an attempt to get down and back to the safety of the ground where gravity can't be as rude as up here.

"Put me down Quiffie!" I practically shouted, scared of falling despite his strong grip on me.

"We're back to this?" he asked incredulously, still not putting me down. I groaned in desperation trying to get down.

Finally he set me down and our bodies sat beside each other on his bed, encompassed by a peaceful silence.

"You never said I could go," I reminded, hesitantly reminding him of our previous 'argument.'

He groaned, putting his hands over his face as he lied back. "I don't want you to go."

"Why not?" I looked at his stressed out state for a moment before looking back to my lap, deciding against moving. "Give me one reason."

He opened his mouth to say something, but I beat him to it.

"A real reason," I said quickly, raising my eyebrow to challenge him silently.

His mouth closed as he thought for a moment before opening it again to speak.

"Other than my guilt, I can't lose you," he admitted, a sigh leaving his lips as he said this.

"How would you lose me?" I looked back to see his face as he stared back at me.

"You could get hurt, captured, there are so many options."

I let out an aggravated growl at his brain process. "So you worry this way about everyone?"

"No," he said, pausing to think for a moment. "Only you."

I rose from the bed, walking toward the door to head to my room.

"You can't live in fear," I told him over my shoulder.

"And I can live without you?" he asked, practically shouting after me.

"You did it before you met me."

I walked out of the room with that, closing the door behind me, and entering my room. My chest was heaving up and down as I tried desperately to cling to the little amount of control I had left of my emotions.

Seconds later, knocking was erupting from the door. I walked over to it, not knowing who would be knocking on the door right now. When the blue eyes make contact with mine, my heart filled with joy and my frazzled nerves jumbled even more.

His hands cupped my cheeks, running his thumb over them over and over again. I closed my eyes at his action, the feeling inside of me swallowing me up like a tsunami tide and carrying me away from shore to an unknown destination. Usually I would be in a panic over losing control, but now it just reminded me of how Luke will protect me. It reminded me of his protectiveness when I put myself in utter danger.

"You're right," he began.

"What exactly am I right about?" I asked in a whisper, not believing what he was saying to me.

A smile spread on his face as he shook his head. "I did live without you before I met you."

I looked at him confused for a second, understanding what he was saying but not believing it entirely.

"But that was before I met you Melissa, and I didn't know what I was missing," he pulled me closer, connecting our lips to each others.

My lips quivered as they touched, missing the feeling they gave me when they were collided despite the short duration since our last kiss. The butterflies in my stomach only multiplied as we pulled away, but my lips still craved his desperately.

"There's no way I can lose you now," he whispered breathlessly, still brushing my cheek lightly with his thumb.

"I never said you had to," I simply responded before his lips captured mine again.

Edited: 25 October 2016