Rion skirted the field all the way to the ocean, Kara in a strangle hold, afraid she would transform and get away. Apparently, this idea had not occurred to her, and though in the water, she seemed disinclined to use her powers. Something in her perceptions had changed while in the field.

Rion recalled the natural way his lips had found the crown of her head and the kiss that was meant for comfort, not passion. Her shield was so unyielding he couldn't tell if that was what she was thinking about as well.

He swam with her in tow but a little way, and pulled her up on the sandy shore. She was trembling violently and he set her down and checked her methodically for injuries. There were no new ones, so he knelt away from her and stared her down. Her eyes were far away, sparkling. Rion felt he had no choice but to probe.

He felt her throw up her shield, and without warning, he pushed through it, showing her that he could. All other times he had respected her privacy, but right now her reaction was enough to warrant his intrusion. Kara buried her face in her hands, and Rion saw the redness creeping up the side of her neck. He sat back on his haunches and rubbed his neck in sympathy.

"Damn home, Kara! Your home is on the land now. You can do more good for them here than you ever could out there."

Her head snapped up and she pitched a handful of sand at him. 

"You don't know! You can't know!"

"Is it the sea?" Rion ducked and flung sand back at her, barely getting her feet.

She flung out a trembling hand. "The sea! The land! The mountain! This isn't my home!"

"But you've been triggered by this... the sea?"

"Triggered?"

"You're crying. Is it because of the sea, or just that you want to go home?"

Kara flung more sand at him and then scrambled to her feet and ran a few yards, before she fell to her knees. Rion watched her go and sat down burying his feet. Salt breeze blew up in his face, and his hair whipped into his eyes. He looked at the water.

Somewhere far out there, was her home. A place he had never been and never would go. A place he could not even imagine. He felt he would go mad there, shut inside with all that crushing water on top of him, drowning death imminent.

Kara...

Leave me alone.

Kara, come back to me.

Shut up! Get out of my head! I hate you!

Ah, come now, na'shilean, you don't hate me.

She ran further away, out of the reach of the salty damp. Waves shimmered for a moment, as if sensing her loss, and then withdrew to plan their next attack. Rion glanced out to the continuous pounding surf. He'd grown up near it all his life, taken it and everything it offered for granted. The waves were a balm to his spirit, apparently, they were not to hers. He pushed himself up and went to her, his feet planted in her line of sight. He didn't touch her.

Get away from me!

I will not.

I said get away from me!

I heard what you said, and I don't take orders from a crying baby.

Her eyes were tormented when they rose to meet his, and yes, they were full of something akin to hatred. They certainly held no fondness. He blew out his breath solemnly. "You shouldn't have run in the crystal field."

She couldn't be goaded into an answer.

"Was it swimming? Don't you swim inside the mountain?"

"Yes, but-- but not out here! Not outside the mountain!"

Rion squatted down beside her again, and this time put a tentative hand on her shoulder, Kara jerked herself away.

"I want to understand." 

"Shut up! There is nothing to understand! I am your prisoner that is all."

He thumbed his chin and gazed at the white caps, cresting far out, and crashing melodically on the shore. Birds flew the air currents and a fine mist coated his skin as he watched them. He was surprised at how the sight of the outside and the sea from this perspective seemed to really bother her. Wasn't it her mission in life to get out of her undersea domes permanently and live on the land?

Unless her irritation right now had less to do with the landscape and more to do with things of a personal nature. Those moments in the crystal field had been very revealing. The outer facade they were both portraying of hostility and being national enemies was at odds with their inner feelings for each other. Rion knew it was confusing to him, divided loyalties and whispered images of new loyalties were crowding his thoughts every moment. He respected her inner privacy and didn't probe unless he had to, but perhaps she was feeling these things as well.

He took a deep breath. "I grew up here, on the shore. It gets very cold in the winter."

Kara kept her face covered, her knees drawn up, her arms wrapped around them tightly.

"We-- that is-- the boys I grew up with, and my foster brothers and sisters, we-- came to the sea to swim in the waves." He sucked in his breath, remembering the way they'd thrown themselves into the cresting waves just as they peaked out and let the heaving water carry them to the shore. It had been exhilarating then, but seemed a long, long time ago. "Sometimes we'd gather driftwood, it floats you see, and we'd wrap our arms around it and let it keep us up."

Kara turned her face to gaze out at the waves. The terrible rocking motion of the sea had subsided. Now she could bear to look at the waves again. She had never in her wildest dreams pictured what the shore might look like. The surface was so vast! It overwhelmed, it was boundless. Inside the sea, the darkness was cloaking. What one couldn't see, one couldn't fear or feel. This, the whole place was free. She felt as if her spirit would escape, fly away with a rough wind. She felt as if the sky pressed down on her, the sea threatened to toss her. She buried her face in her arms and felt her throat choke up against her will.

"There is no winter down there."

Rion pursed his lips and nodded. "No winter."

"The temperature is always the same. Sometimes you pretend you feel a breeze."

"There is wind inside the tunnels."

"Yes."

He continued to rock back and forth, rubbing his chin occasionally. The growth of beard he sported was unkempt and scraggly. He didn't like it at all. He was used to going clean shaven. His hair was hot and it tickled his neck as it dried. 

You don't hate me, na'shilean.

I do.

He smiled to himself as she turned to face him, her cheek still resting on her knees, her fingers clasped together and propping her chin up. The dark lashes looked like a fringe of spider legs, but he didn't suppose she'd ever seen a spider, they didn't live inside the mountain. He doubted they lived inside the undersea domes. He would have to think of a better analogy to compare her to than spiders.

You don't hate me, na'shilean.

Then what am I feeling?

You are adjusting your perspective to accommodate the data your mind is receiving. This place, outside the mountain--- it is new and unfamiliar. Perhaps you thought it would be different when you finally got out, or you didn't quite know what to expect.

It is unpredictable.

I agree.

You are unpredictable.

Rion drew in his breath sharply as he squinted at the frothing waves. I wasn't always.

I think you were.

You didn't know me always. I was very strict and obedient.

You still are strict and obedient--- to natural laws and to your honor.

He was shocked that she sensed this about him, his heart constricted at the thought that she read him so well.

What I am doing with you is not strict-- or obedient.

No, it is very dangerous and unprecedented, and although you treat me with respect, you are not honoring either of our missions.

Perhaps there is a higher mission in life, Kara.

They glared into each other's eyes, not reading or listening for thoughts, and not projecting their deepest innermost feelings.

My thoughts about you are clouding my focus.

Kara turned her face away, and finally drew circles in the sand with her fingers. Rion watched her carefully, wishing he could violate that inner core and know what she was thinking and feeling.

"There won't be any more Zalez lessons."

She turned back. "Fine."

"I have taught you all I can. You can obviously meditate alone, enter and exit alone and probe-- at least you know how to probe me."

"I won't probe you. I want to be away from you."

"You don't have a choice, na' shilean. We are connected."

She didn't answer him but kept her face away. Rion reached out and stroked her hair as stray strands flew in the salty breeze. She didn't flinch, and he figured she couldn't feel it. But then she pulled the hair away from him. He grunted in annoyance, pulled her head close to his own bent knee and kissed her once again for good measure. 

*******