It's been a month. A month since I woke up. I'm supposed to feel good and happy to be back, but I don't. Nightmares of everybody dying tortured me every night. I know that they are alive, but everything tells me they aren't.

Everything is different. Everybody is different. They aren't the same as they were in The Town. Here I'm supposed to know people I don't remember. I'm supposed to go to school and do things I don't remember how to do.

Essence won't talk to me here. She thinks I'm some creep. Cade isn't the same out here. He doesn't treat me the same, he treats me like I'm damaged. Everybody treats me like I'm broken.

"I'm not broken," I whisper in between sobs.

Here I felt like nothing. Nothing I did mattered. At least in The Town, the things I did had some importance.

I wince and close my eyes as the knife I was holding to my wrist sliced into my skin. I couldn't do this anymore. Nothing was the same. Nothing mattered.

Alistair bailed on me. He said I was 'too much to handle.' I had nobody now. Nobody saw me as a good person. They all saw me as a burden. They all thought I was crazy. Just because I saw Elder Ryann didn't mean I was crazy. Just because I didn't remember I could wear whatever I wanted here and freaked out didn't mean I was out of my mind.

I had to go to therapy now. I had to talk to this dumb woman that couldn't tell that I was lying if my life depended on it. I wasn't even allowed to see Nova unless my parents were with me. They thought I would harm her. That probably hurt me the most.

All I wanted was my life back. My life in The Town where I knew what everything was. My life where Cade loved me. My life where Alistair was my friend. My life where Essence was my mother.

Well, the way I got here was dying, so maybe it was the same here. I hoped it was the same here.

I opened my mouth and screamed soundlessly. There was nobody to save me.

I dug the knife into my wrist and pulled down. I couldn't do this alone. I couldn't do what everybody wanted me to do. It was all too much.

I couldn't just wake up, go to school, and have my life be normal. I couldn't just shut off hearing the voices and thinking of The Town. At least I had people that cared about me there even if they were dead.

I felt myself getting lightheaded as my blood poured out of my wrist. I pulled the knife down the other one, sobbing and screaming and pain. It didn't matter if anybody heard me anymore. It's not like they'd care. They'd be happy I was gone.

A smile finally pulled across my face. I could go home now.

"It's all better," I slurred.

Blood slowly painted my carpet as I collapsed. Floods of O-negative stained my white shirt. Red, just like my color in The Town. Good.

I heard the door opening. I was getting closer to The Town. If I could just die here I'd get back there. I was so close.

"Evie-Weavie are you okay? Evie? I heard you scream?"

"I'm coming Nova," I whispered.

I was so close I could hear Nova.

"Evie," she said urgently. "Why are you bleeding on the floor? Are you okay Evie?"

I felt small hands grip my wrists.

"Evie, y-you're dying. You hurt yourself, Evie. W-why would you do that? Mommy said not to do that anymore! She said you wouldn't!"

I felt sprinkles of tears on me as my eyes focused on Nova leaning over me. She was covered in my blood. She was trying frantically to make my wrists stop bleeding.

"Evie why," She screamed.

"I need to go back," I whispered.

"Evie, n-no. You just woke up Evie. I need you. I cried every day you slept. You left-you left me all alone. I can't be alone again. I want my big sister."

I felt my eyes drooped down.

"I'm going to die here soon."

"Evie, please! I'm not- a warrior! What did I do Evie? Was I- was I too annoying? Did I talk too much? Why did-did you hurt yourself because of me? What did I do-what-what did I do?"

I didn't have enough energy to answer as my eyes shut for good.

"I-I, I'm going to get you a lot of band-aids, Evie. I just need-I just need to fix the cuts. Please don't go back to sleep."

I felt my body stop moving. I could feel as my heart stopped beating and my lungs stopped filling with air. I was dead. It didn't feel like I thought it would. I wasn't scared. I just felt at peace. All I ever wanted was to be at peace. My soul floated up into the air. My body was visible beneath me as I watched.

I watched as Nova put her colorful princess band-aids all over my body and for once everything was clear. There were no delusions.

I had just killed myself and my little sister was still trying to save me. I had just ruined her entire life.

"I'm-I'm fixing you, Evie. I know you'll wake up soon."

I wouldn't wake up soon.

"You're fine," she sobbed

She put her hand near my mouth.

"You're not breathing. No, Evie, you-you're supposed to be fine. You're- you're supposed to bring me school and to the pool. You s-supposed to scare my boyfriend when I get old. Y-you are supposed to s-see me-see me get married. You're supposed to-to be, my big sister. I need- need you."

Her mouth trembled and I nearly threw-up.

"You're d-dead. Evie, no. Please-please. Ev-Evie."

Nova forced herself into my limp arms. She sobbed as my blood soaked her. I couldn't do this to her. She couldn't go through this.

All I could do was watch as my sister was yanked off of me and my mother and father started to try and save me. I watched as they wept and yelled and tried to patch my wounds. There was nothing they could do.

"She's dead," Nova screamed. " We can't her, mommy. Even princess band-aids didn't save her. She said- said that she needed to go. Evie-Evie wasn't happy-happy here."

My mother sobbed and my father held her in his arms, they knew none of it was a lie.

"She never smiled anymore. She-she didn't hug me the same. And-and you- you guys didn't treat- treat her the same. Evie was so sad mom. I heard her cry at night."

"Stop!"

My mother quickly ran out of the room and I heard her call the police. Too bad nobody was to blame for this but them and me.

"Nova," my dad whispered. "What else did she say? Did she say she loved us?"

Nova shook her head, "I think she wanted to die because of me too, daddy. I think she hates me, daddy. I just want her back. Why-why won't she come back?"

Nova sobbed and yelled about me coming back and how I hated her. I could never hate her, but I couldn't tell her I loved her ever again. I was dead. I had done this. I had ruined my family. They did me but I was so messed up I couldn't see it. And I didn't get a second chance.

Soon, my parents and my sister faded away. I could see and hear nothing. The only thing I could hear was my sobs. Why couldn't everything just end like I thought it would?

Instead, I turned around and I saw The Town. Everybody was alive again and the gates were wide open. Everyone was smiling and happy.

I gasped and my eyes widened as I saw Nova, Essence, Cade, and Alistair gesturing to me. They wanted me to come with them.

I took a step forward and my memories started to get fuzzy.

"What's happening?"

Essence giggled, "You must forget your issues to live here. There is no talk of sadness."

"But my sister?"

"Is she not right here?"

"No!" I screamed. "I can't leave her, the real her, sad down there while I get too happy! I don't deserve to be happy!"

Suddenly my world came back into view and I was sitting in the hospital chair.

"Another hallucination?"

I felt my tears well up, "Will this ever end?"

Nurse Essence hugged me, "It will, Honey. But it's going to take a lot of work and patience."

I sighed deeply. How was I ever going to become a part of society again? I had missed so much. I had missed making friends and going to school, and dances, and my sister.

"Where is Nova?"

My voice came off very harsh, but I had to see her. Within a second a little body flew onto mine.

"She's been waiting the whole time," Essence laughed.

"Evie, Evie! Today is the day! Today you get to leave and we get to go get ice-cream and go swimming and play jump-rope and watch T.V and-"

"Slow down there buggy," I said, smiling. "You've got to take it easy on me. I just had a bad nightmare."

Nova's eyes grew concerned, "Are you okay, Evie? What was the bad dream?"

I couldn't tell her the truth. That I had killed myself and she tried to save me. I could bear to picture the tears crawling down her face as she felt her little heartbreak. I would never do that to her, I vowed to myself. Never.

"There was a monster," I said instead.

Nova nodded, "Monsters are scary. I had a bad dream last night too Evie."

I furrowed my eyebrows, "What was it?"

She shuddered, "I don't want to tell, but promise you won't leave me again?"

I felt my heart clench, "I will never leave you again, baby. Never."

She frowned, "Even if Ali and Cadie left you alone?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat, "Even then, but didn't you say they were coming today?"

"Shhh," she said, her eyes wide. "Mommy and daddy said it was a surprise. I wasn't supposed to tell you."

I laughed, "They should have known."

She nodded, "I'm a warrior, not a secret-keeper person."

"That you are, buggy."

I smiled in remembrance and pulled out the small locket that had been in my pocket when I had first woken up. I held it out to Nova with her initials facing her.

Her eyes watered, "I put it in your pocket when you were sleeping. I thought that maybe it would make your dream of me so I could tell you I missed you."

I smiled, "I think it worked."

She grinned back at me and for a moment I thought I could do it. My little sister had all of the faith in the world in me and that was all that mattered.

"I love you, Evie."

"I love you too, Buggy."

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Wow. That's it folks. I just want to thank everybody that gave this a book a chance. I know it isn't easy at times bc it's confusing and really makes you think. People have disuaded me from doing that but I will never change my story and I hope you follow that same rule. Nobody's opinion matters more than your own. So thank you, for reading, commenting, and just being great. I love you all more than you know. 

Lemme know what you think of the ending!

Would you want an epoligue or a bonus chapter?