Kajal paced her room nervously, n few minutes she would move from being single to in relationship. Dressed in pink traditional attire she waited for her mother to call her to the main hall to begin the engagement rituals.  After pondering for a week, she had finally given in to the idea of getting into a relationship with Tarun. But now when d day had arrived, she turned cold. Since her relatives and extended family had seen Tarun's picture they had been going gaga over the handsome groom. They had been bragging how lucky Kajal was that the groom was ready to marry her

''You are so lucky !'' That's what Kajal had been hearing since morning. She wanted to ask all these people wasn't Tarun lucky to have her as a life partner ? Did all the name and achievements she acquired till now had no value compared to his looks. She felt a strange choking sensation filling her chest. She counted till 10 to calm her heart, The voices from other side of the door took her attention, she pulled open the door and stood against the railing watching the guests in the hall below. Everybody looked so excited; will it hurt bad if she backed out now? She shook her head to get rid of escapist thoughts; no one had forced her to accept the relationship. She went ahead on her will; she knew her mother too wanted it.

Her eyes went to Tarun who was being crowded by a group of her cousins busy taking selfies with him. He too seemed comfortable and enjoying all the attention being thrown at him. ''You look great'' Kajal smiled at her cousin for complimenting her, just when she had decided not to think negative her cousins words ignited the fire again, ''Umm ...don't mind, but I guess you should have used a little more foundation to look fairer. You are beautiful, but he is just too good.''

''He is, and I am good the way I am.'' The girl quickly retreated looking at Kajal's fiery eyes. The doubts started clouding her mind again. She recalled her previous interactions with Tarun, and absence of any of his friends made her think otherwise. She had invited her close ones but she couldn't find any of his friends; it wasn't likely that he didn't had friends because she noticed him enjoying the attention , then what could be the reason he didn't invite them ? Was he not comfortable about her?

Kajal blinked a couple of time to control the wetness that dreads to fall from her eyes. Moving back to her room she messaged Tarun asking him to meet her in the back lawn. Tarun excused himself after reading the message, he was little confused about her desire to meet him now. He made his way to the back lawn and found her standing with her back to him. He took slow steps to her, taking in her complete form ,''Hi!''

Kajal turned and locked her eyes with Tarun, ''Are you sure you want this wedding?''

''What made you ask this?''

''Traun, don't get me wrong but I want to know if you are really interested in marrying me and this is not some kind of pressure.''

''Kajal it was me who convinced you for this relationship.''

She smiled, ''That makes me all the way more doubtful. Why haven't you invited your friends?''

He frowned, ''I did, they couldn't attend for some reason.'' He replied trying best to sound calm. She kept her eyes glued to his face. Tarun took a step and held her by forearms, ''Will you now relax''

''Are you sure you want to marry me?'' She asked again, this time stressing a little more. He smiled and nodded, ''Yes.''

The couple exchanged the rings between the cheers and flashes. The families congratulated each other for the new bond. Devyani dawned a beautiful red stole over Kajal's head welcoming her formally, ''Thanks for accepting us.''

Kajal smiled at the elder lady, unlike her son Devyani's words sounded more genuine to her. The guests celebrated dancing and blessing the new couple. Tarun did join them when insisted, but for some reason Kajal just kept herself excluded. She only danced when Tarun pulled her along, he didn't wanted people around them to doubt about her silence. ''I know you dance well, I had seen you grooving on your birthday.''

She smiled, ''And still you didn't wish me''

''Hey, I was scared what if you scolded me like Shimla.'' He replied sounding defensive. She pressed her lips tightly to hide her laughter. Though they conversed and danced together, their body language was far from that of a couple.

***

Tarun stood at the window of his room staring down at the gold band around his finger. He finally was committed, to someone he had never thought of having as a partner. He did have certain dreams about his partner, but now he had to let them go. Racking his hands through his hair he let out a sigh, he cursed himself for creating a mess. He did had a chance when Kajal straight away asked his feelings about this relationship, somehow he couldn't bring himself to confess that he had created the mess and dragged her into it. He feared the opinion of people around him, he feared being judged. He knew if Kajal would have got slightest of hint, she wouldn't have cared of the crowd, guests or the world and that would have brought him down in his parents eyes and it would have broke their heart. Come what may, he couldn't do a thing that would break his parents heart.

Moving to the bed, he threw his back on to it staring at the ceiling in the dark. He recalled Kajal's scrutinizing eyes, it felt as if she would read him like open book. Feeling disgusted he covered his eyes with his palms. How he wished he had 10% of Kajal's attitude , he wouldn't have been in this situation.

'Even then, would you have opened your heart?' Asked his mind. He knew the answer, he wouldn't have. He was an ideal son, man and a friend in the eyes of the one around him and he would do all to keep that image intact. Staring at the ring, he pledged, 'I know, all this started at the wrong point. But I promise to be a good husband to you Kajal. Hope someday you would understand me.'

Turning to his left he closed his eyes to relax, gradually sleep took over his clouded mind and he surrended his thoughts to it.

"Mom isn't that too soon? Just a month, you know I have 3 projects to finish.'' Kajal whined as Sheela confirmed her wedding date.

''You anyways work from home, so that shouldn't be an issue and one project won't cost you a fortune.''

Their conversation ended by the ringing of Kajal's phone, excusing self she moved into the garden to take the call, ''Hi Robin''

''Where are you? You said you would be coming to discuss the idea about the next collection'' He sounded desperate.

Kajal took a deep breath, ''Would it be fine if have the discussion over Skype or phone. Actually, I got engaged to be married in a month and my mom is not allowing me to step out.''

Robin felt being hit by a bolt, he had been travelling for 2 weeks doing various brand promotion at different locations. He had made up his mind to propose Kajal, now he lost the chance forever.

''Are you there?'' Her voice broke his stance. Controlling his emotions, he congratulated her disconnecting the next moment. She felt strange, but ignored. Kajal jumped when someone called her out . She turned to collide with Tarun who stood just a cm apart from her, ''You want me dead, this is why you keep scaring me.''

''I wanted to ask, why do you jump like this every time?''

''I just get too involved in whatever I do, and when someone shows up suddenly it leaves me startled. What are you doing here?'' She asked raising a brow

''Mom asked me to leave this at your place.'' He gestured towards a big bag over his shoulder. She smiled, ''So why didn't you just walked in and left with mom''

He took a step, ''Was curious to know whom you were speaking to so secretly.'' Kajal blinked, ''Ask me and I will answer, you don't have to spy.''

He stepped forward, ''Sorry, I was just teasing you. About asking, I am not a male chauvinist. I agree I am not as strong as you are but I am not a bad guy.'' She studied him for a minute before stretching her lips into a smile. Tarun's heart fluttered, he lowered his eyes that instant confused about the sudden reaction. She walked head gesturing him to follow her.

***

''But was is the need for a new apartment?'' Tarun asked his mother

''it's a gift from Kajal's parents and us to you both.'' Devyani replied busy making the list of essentials for the upcoming wedding in a week.

''Mom but we can stay here and Kajal too hasn't demanded anything like that.'' He reasoned. He was scared about being alone with Kajal, he needed time to accept the marriage completely and for that he needed his parents support. He exactly didn't know how to accept the big change.

''Tarun, you are starting a new life and a girl faces expectations from everyone, whereas she expects just from one, her husband. Yours is an arranged match, we want you guys to understand each other without any of us hovering around. There should be no filters, no hesitation, and we aren't running away. You can come and visit us any day you want.'' She patted his cheek and went about doing the job. Tarun couldn't explain his mother that having no filters was the reason he was worried about. Kajal being a sharp observer could easily read between the lines. He closed his eyes once to prepare his mind for upcoming events.

''You didn't even bother to update me about your wedding?'' Tarun jerked up when someone punched his arm hard

''Praveen!!!'' He blinked a couple of times watching his friend, ''Nothing like that, I was about to invite you.''

''Really? Then how come I never got the invitation for your engagement.'' Praveen's query left him tongue tied. He hadn't invited his group as except Praveen, all blamed him for breaking Sejal's heart. He felt guilty about the same and decided to avoid all to let the things cool down. He explained Praveen his reason, the latter shook his head, ''This happens because you keep looking for their approvals and desire to be best in their eyes. It's okay to be bad sometimes Tarun.'' Their conversation came to halt with arrival of Devyani who lovingly reprimanded Praveen for being late and assigned him a number of errands to be done. Praveen grinned wide and followed her discussing all about the wedding, leaving Tarun alone with his disturbed thoughts. He looked around at the preparations, the excited faces and felt suffocated. Picking his keys he quickly drove off to a place where he could just relax and prepare his mind for the biggest change in his life. He had now started feeling the heat of his deed, in his desire to be good he had created a mess which couldn't be altered, at least according to him. He didn't love her and wasn't sure if he ever be able to do. All he knew was that he had to make this relationship a success, not just for him but for his family. One wrong step would leave his parents heartbroken and his mother hurt for life. Driving aimlessly he prayed to God to give him strength to face whatever was coming through, but he failed to untangle the mess which was much simpler than he thought it to be.

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Next- The wedding and initial days.

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