Alright, listen up, young'uns! There is a Wattpader by the name of Tacoguy02 that has written a RWBY fanfic that isn't shit. Go harass his page by following him and checking out his story. It's some good shit. Thanks a bunch.

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Within a section of Remnant untouched by the war, the leader of the Children, Pastor Absoliman Nichts, spends his time meditating. Trying to calm himself for his public appearance in less than an hour. If all goes well, he will successfully acquired not only sympathizers, but possibly new allies as well. However, the risk of failure is almost as worrying as being stopped.

He is taking away the support of the people from his enemies right in their own land. If he is captured, it will land a harsh blow on his Children... Thankfully, he is not alone on this journey.

Somewhere in the Eastern coast of Vale, within a building commandeered by the Children, the Pastor isolates himself in a barren room to prepare his little speech. However, given the fact that he declared World War Two on Remnant and swore to raze everything that is related to the old world governments, convincing the people to change sides would be a difficult task. Almost hilariously impossible.

But for him, as long as his semblance remains strong, herding the stubborn sheep won't be a problem.

As he figures out ways to try and avoid stirring an angry mob, Nichts suddenly hears a familiar  voice speak out behind him. From someone that definitely wasn't in the room before. A life long friend and personal guard, Tollgerr. Leader of the Children's Acolytes.

Tollgerr: Only ten minutes until we depart, Pastor.

The man in black robes turns around and faces the owner of the voice. A fairly taller individual in a much more detailed robe of varying shades of gray with red highlights. A hood and metallic mask hiding his face. Resting on his hip, a long mysterious silver rod dangles at his side. After many years with the warrior, Nichts knows full well it is Tollgerr's signature weapon. A strange bit of tech that ignites into two blades of condensed plasma.

At the moment, Tollgerr simply awaits  Nichts' command. While the man himself wonders how he was able to sneak inside the room.

Nichts: Are your Acolytes prepared?

Tollgerr: They always are.

Nichts: Then let's make our way. No point in delaying.

The robed warrior steps to the side to allow Nichts to pass through. As he leaves the room, Tollgerr follows close behind. Leaving the building and towards their destination. A central fountain in a town square. The sun about an hour or two from sunset.

As the two walk out of the building, several individuals in black robes immediately follow behind the pair. Obviously the Acolytes assigned to protect the Pastor along with Tollgerr. A very intimidating sight as they travel towards town.

Back over to the building, around the corner, a dumpster is spotted to be wide open. Filled to the brim with garbage. A bag or two suddenly shift a bit. The sound of bags crinkling, cans crunching, and glass clanking is heard as a hand soon pops out. Said hand grabs the edge of the dumpster and pulls up the person connected to it. A thin and lengthy guy with brown hair and eyes lifts himself up. He swings his other arm over as well, gripping what seems to be a bulky black shotgun with a knife attached.

To anyone who gives a shit, this is 5hoursofRegret. And right now, he looks absolutely disgusting with bits of trash stuck to his form. A banana peel on his head, a used condom behind his ear, a cheeseburger wrapper stuck to his cheek, and I hope to God that's mayonnaise on his chin. He stares off with a fierce glare as he rips the wrapper and condom from his face.

Regret: This is the WORST character introduction I have ever been a part of!

With a mighty-ish heeve, he pulls himself out of the dumpster. Bits of garbage falling out as well. Now on solid ground, Regret holsters his shotty and tries to dust himself off. He stops halfway after seeing he's just smearing the stains more.

Regret: Christ, I need a shower. And a change of clothes... Or skin.

Now noticing the building he's next to, Regret just walks over to the door and lets himself in without hesitation. This is how people get shot in Texas, you know.

Back with Nichts and the Acolytes, they finally arrive to the town square's fountain. A fairly open area with an oversized water dispenser in the middle. The occasional passer by walking past, giving the group worried glances. The Acolytes scatter about while Tollgerr remains close by to Nichts. The Pastor makes his way to the front of the fountain and takes a step on the rim.

Here goes nothing.

Nichts: "ahem" Ladies and gentlemen of Tributary, my name is Absoliman Nichts, Pastor of the Children. I am here to speak to you of the horrors that threaten our very existence. Greed. Stubbornness. Ignorance. The leaders and governments of today are willing to throw your lives into the fires of war just to warm themselves from the cold grasp of truth. The end of Remnant.

A few citizens look towards Nichts, wondering who the hell this rambling robed man is and what he's on about. The slightest attention is all he needed for his semblance to take affect. Those same people soon stop in place, now listening to what he has to say. Some actually showing signs of concern on what he said.

Nichts: Yes, the actual world we live in is on the brink of destruction if this war were to fall into favor of the Old World governments. They do not care for the lives of the people! They only care about the resources they can plunder from our suffering. But like any war, its only means of continuing is the people that unknowingly support the warmongers that run it.

Citizen1: And how different are you and these Children!? You're the ones that declared war on the Four Kingdoms! And not once have we ever heard of you until then!

As more people are drawn in by Nichts' speech, a more bold individual speaks out with reasonable disinterest towards the man that leads the enemies of the kingdom. Nichts is more than willing to respond.

Nichts: How different are we, a people that have remained in hiding for years in fear of the greedy opportunists who would happily abuse the lives of more innocents for their own gain, to the ones that have struck the first blow? Are we, the Children, truly deserving of being vilified for seeking retribution against the ones that have taken the lives of our loved ones back in Mistral? What say you then?

His response was enough to silence the naysayer. At this point, a fairly large group of citizens have gathered around the fountain to listen to what the Pastor has to say.

Nichts: No. Unlike your governments, the Children care for their own and the world we live in. We fight not only against the unjust that has plagued our world for far too long, but for our survival. But this war does not have to go any further than it needs to. As I have said, the ones that lead the wars have a say on what to do. But you the people, the ones that are truly fighting, have the power to starve your governments into submission... I am not asking you to turn coat and join the Children. Only that you understand what kind of beast you are feeding.

And so, for nearly an hour, Pastor Nichts talks his ass off to the town's people. Practically convincing them to question their alliances in a matter of minutes. Surprisingly, aside that one naysayer, there wasn't that much of a scene. There were a few questions from the citizens. What are the Children's intentions in this war? What do they plan to do? Are the people going to be safe if the Children win? Every question asked, Nichts was more than happy to answer.

After some time, Nichts and his Acolytes finally returned to their building. Once they enter, the Acolytes leave to go about their tasks. Tollgerr staying close to his old friend once again.

Tollgerr: I'd say that went fairly well, all things considered.

Nichts: Yes. Because of that, I believe that other communities will see reason just as easily.

As the two continue speaking, they are cut silent from a strange voice ahead of them. Just behind a door leading to a restroom. Regret soon walks out with a towel wrapped around his waist.

Regret: Aaah~ Now that was the best shower I've ever ha-

Without a chance to finish that sentence, Regret is swiftly grabbed by the throat and and sent rushing back into the bathroom. Getting his head smashed into a wall as he's hoist up by Tollgerr. Quickly pulling up his weapon and igniting a red blade, holding it close to Regret's face.

Tollgerr: Who are you and why are you here?!

Regret: Holy shit! How is that lightsaber not burning everyone in this room alive!? This is scientifically impossible!

As the two are yelling, Nichts finally arrives to the scene.

Nichts: What seems to be the issue, Tollgerr?

Tollgerr: Stay back! We have been infiltrated by a poorly trained assassin!

Regret: You know, words hurt more than this throbbing pain at the back of my head right now.

Nichts takes a look at the barely naked boy. Feeling like he has seen this individual before.

Nichts: Wait a moment. I think I recognize him.

The two look at the Pastor questioningly.

Nichts: Yes, now I know where I have seen you... You are one of the members of team OPAB. Bedauern, correct? I have seen your match during the Vytal Festival.

Tollgerr hesitantly lets go of the boy, still training his blade at him. Regret straightens out his towel and faces Nichts.

Regret: Um, just call me Regret. Who are you guys?

Nichts: A pleasure to meet you, Regret. My name is Absoliman Nichts. The one currently an inch away from severing your head from your shoulders is Tollgerr... Might I ask as to why you are here, Regret? As in, in our building without permission.

Regret is hesitant on talking to these two. Especially with one of them pointing a fucking lightsaber at him. But for some reason... Nichts seems all right in his book.

Regret: Uuuhh, well, I've been kinda wandering around for a few months ever since I got shot out of a window. Tried bunkering down at an old junkyard and somehow ended up in a dumpster nearby. The details are kinda fuzzy for me.... Or the author is just being lazy.

Nichts:.... Tell me, boy, would you be interested in some work? If what I have seen during your short time in the Vytal Festival is accurate, you are a very capable fighter. And it would be a shame to have such talents wasted.

Now, something doesn't seem right for Regret. Normally he'd tell them to kiss his ass and try to fight his way out. But... something about what Nichts is saying seems to be convincing. Very convincing.

Regret: Eh, I got nothing better to do. Sure.

Tollgerr finally deactivates his energy sword. Keeping it in hand just in case.

Nichts: Splendid! Also, if possible, could you be able to bring along your companions? I'm sure with just another member of your team, you would be quite the force.

Regret: Oh, I'm certain they'd be excited to join the party!..... Do you have a phone by chance?

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p0zi0ner: I'm BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED!

Warlider: Oh, are you now? I didn't hear you the first fifty times. Thank you for notifying me!

As the two try to annoy each other, War suddenly hears a ringing in his helmet.

Warlider: Hang on. I'm getting a call. *beep* This is Warlider. Forgotten General of the Forgotten Fleet. State your business, or be hunted down like the filthy animal you are.

Regret: Hey, War! It's me, Regret!

Warlider: Reg? Holy shit, I thought you were dead!

Regret: Nah, only on the inside. Anywho, big news! How would you guys like to join me in some jolly cooperation of death and destruction?

Warlider:........... NANNER!

p0zi0ner: Ow! Right in my fucking ear! What?!

Warlider: Git yer golden panties on and grab your mace! We're finally gonna do some shit!

p0zi0ner: Sweet! Wait, hang on a sec. MOD!

After a few seconds of silence, the author pops his head into the room.

A/n: Oi?

p0zi0ner: Can War and I head out to cause some mayhem?

A/n: Will you do as I say if I said no?

p0zi0ner: No. I just want to look like less of an asshole in front of the audience by asking first.

A/n: Fine, whatever. Just don't break too much shit. Or there'll be hell to pay. Have fun, kiddies!

The two heavy suited individuals quickly rush out the door and into the world of Remnant. Beginning what might be an after chapters series of shit.