35. life now

guys Sev and Bucky are free from HYDRA's grasp OFFICIALLY!!!!!!









THE NEW APARTMENT WAS MODEST,
but comfortable space, a far cry from the chaotic life on the run. Bucky had finally been pardoned for his past "crimes", but both he and Sev were required to attend mandated therapy sessions as part of their rehabilitation. It was a new beginning, a chance to build a semblance of normalcy.

Sev was sprawled out on the couch, a textbook open in front of her. Steve's insistence on her education had stuck, and she was diligently working through her assignments. The apartment was quiet, save for the distant hum of the city outside.

The front door creaked open, and Bucky stepped inside. Sev didn't look up immediately, engrossed in a particularly challenging math problem. It wasn't until she heard a familiar voice that she glanced up.

"Hey, Sev," Bucky called out, standing awkwardly in the doorway.

Sev's eyes widened in shock. Bucky stood there, his once-long hair now cut short. The new look was startling, a significant departure from the image she had grown accustomed to. For a moment, she just stared, trying to reconcile this new appearance with the Bucky she knew.

"Papa?" she finally managed, her voice a mix of surprise and curiosity. "You... you got a haircut."

Bucky shrugged, a small, almost shy smile playing on his lips. "Yeah, figured it was time for a change. What do you think? And don't say it's flustercluck."

Sev blinked a few times, still processing the transformation. She stood up and walked over to him, reaching out hesitantly to touch his now-short hair. It felt strange under her fingers, but as she looked into his eyes, she saw the same warmth and love she always had.

"It's... different," she said slowly, then broke into a genuine smile. "But it looks good. Really good, Papa."

Bucky's smile widened, relief evident in his eyes. "You think so?"

Sev nodded emphatically. "Yeah, I do. It suits you."

Bucky chuckled, ruffling her hair affectionately. "Thanks, Sev. I wasn't sure how you'd react."

Sev laughed, the sound light and genuine. "It's going to take some getting used to, but I like it."

They moved into the living room, settling into the comfortable routine they were building together. Bucky glanced around, taking in the sight of the apartment they were slowly turning into a home.

"How's the reading going?" he asked, nodding towards her textbooks. "You know you don't have to read textbooks, school doesn't start for a bit, and I'm probably gonna homeschool you."

"Steve said reading is beneficial." Sev groaned, rolling her eyes. "But Steve was just as bad at reading as I am."

Bucky chuckled. "Steve did suck at reading, huh?"

Sev smiled, grateful for his presence. "Yeah..."










NOT EATING HAD BECOME A ritual in their for Sev. Bucky watched as Sev pushed her food around her plate, her eyes distant and unengaged. He had made her favorite dish, hoping it would break through her malaise, but it seemed to have little effect.

"Sev," Bucky began softly, "you need to eat."

She glanced up at him, her face a mix of frustration and sadness. "I know, Dad. It's just..."

Bucky leaned forward, his expression filled with concern. "Just what?"

Sev sighed, dropping her fork and staring at the untouched food. "I hate eating because it doesn't fill me up. I just feel empty either way. What's the point? Why would I do something that has zero effect for me."

Bucky's heart ached at her words. He took a deep breath, trying to keep his own emotions in check. "They definitely do have an effect. So you have to eat. Your body needs fuel to keep going. If you don't eat, you're not going to make it. And I can't lose you, not after everything we've been through."

Sev looked at him, tears welling in her eyes. "But it feels so pointless, papa. I feel empty no matter what I do."

Bucky reached across the table, taking her hand in his. "I know it's hard, baby. But eating is part of taking care of yourself. We're trying to build a new life here, and I need you to be strong. We'll get through this together, but you have to help me by taking care of yourself. Please."

Sev nodded slowly, picking up her fork again. "Okay, papa. I'll try."

She took a couple of tentative bites, chewing slowly. Bucky watched her, relief washing over him as she started to eat. It was a small victory, but it was a step in the right direction.

Just then, a knock came at the door. Bucky stood up, glancing at Sev. "I'll be right back."

Sev nodded, but as soon as Bucky left the room, she scurried to her own room, shutting the door behind her.

Bucky opened the door to find Sam standing there, a concerned look on his face. "Hey, man," Sam said, stepping inside. "Just wanted to check in on Sev."

Bucky nodded, his eyes flicking back to the now-empty dining area. "She was eating, but she ran off to her room when you knocked."

Sam sighed, shaking his head. "I get it. It's tough."

"Yeah," Bucky said, closing the door behind Sam and gesturing for him to sit down. "It's been a struggle. She hasn't been eating much. I'm really worried about her."

Sam sat down at the table, looking at the untouched food on Sev's plate. "She's been through a lot. Sometimes it's hard for kids to process all that."

Bucky nodded, running a hand through his hair. "I just don't know how to help her. She says eating feels pointless because she feels empty no matter what."

Sam looked thoughtful for a moment. "Maybe it's not just about the food. Maybe it's about finding something that makes her feel...whole. Something that gives her a reason to want to take care of herself."

Bucky sighed, rubbing his eyes. "I've tried everything I can think of, Sam. I just don't know what else to do."

Sam placed a hand on Bucky's shoulder. "We'll figure it out, Buck. She's got you, and she's got me."














IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT,
Sev found her papa sleeping on the floor. She couldn't sleep; it was hard sometimes to sleep on a bed just as much as it was for Bucky. She hated to admit it, but she missed being crammed up on that tiny cot they used to share.

She knelt down beside him, gently shaking his shoulder. "Papa, papa, wake up..."

Bucky woke with a jolt, his eyes wide with disorientation. "Huh?" He blinked a few times, focusing on Sev, who stood there holding her blanket. "What's the matter?" he asked, his voice groggy.

"Can I sleep here with you? I hate sleeping alone sometimes," she admitted, her voice small and hesitant.

Bucky smiled, the warmth of his affection evident despite his fatigue. He lifted the blanket, making room for her to crawl under. "Of course you can, baby. Come on in."

Sev wasted no time, slipping under the blanket and nestling close to him. Bucky moved to his side, creating a comfortable space for her. Sev mirrored his movement, turning on her side and resting her head against his chest. She could feel the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, a comforting reminder that she wasn't alone.

Bucky wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. He began to rub her back gently, the repetitive motion soothing. "It's okay, Sev," he whispered. "I'm right here, baby girl. You're safe."

Safe.

Safe.

Safe.

Sev felt the tension slowly melt away as she snuggled closer, her body relaxing in her father's embrace. "I miss this," she murmured, her voice muffled against his chest.

"I do too," Bucky replied softly, his chin resting on the top of her head. "It's going to be alright."

His gentle words and the warmth of his presence lulled Sev into a sense of security she hadn't felt in a long time. Her eyelids grew heavy, and before long, she drifted into a peaceful sleep, the soft rise and fall of her father's chest lulling her into a dreamless slumber.

Bucky held her close, his own eyes fluttering shut. For the first time in what felt like forever, he too found solace in the simplicity of the moment, lying there with his daughter in his arms. As he drifted off, he whispered one last reassurance, more to himself than to her, "We'll be okay, Sev. We'll be okay."















THE NEXT MORNING, Sev woke up to the smell of breakfast wafting through the apartment. She stretched and blinked sleepily, feeling the warmth of the morning sun streaming through the window. Bucky was already up, moving around the small kitchen area. She could hear the faint clatter of pans and the sizzle of something cooking.

She sat up, rubbing her eyes and gathering her blanket around her shoulders. As she walked into the kitchen, she saw her papa standing by the stove, focused on making breakfast.

"Morning, Papa," she said, her voice still thick with sleep.

Bucky turned and gave her a warm smile. "Morning, Sev. Did you sleep okay?"

She nodded, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Yeah, I did. Thanks for letting me sleep with you."

"Anytime, baby," he said, turning back to the stove. "Breakfast will be ready in a minute. Go ahead and sit down."

Sev took a seat at the small table, watching her father work. He plated some scrambled eggs and toast, setting a plate in front of her. As he joined her at the table with his own plate, the atmosphere shifted slightly. Sev could feel it coming—the conversation she had been dreading.

Bucky took a deep breath, glancing at her with a serious expression. "Sev, we need to talk about last night. And dinner."

Sev's shoulders tensed, and she looked down at her plate, picking at her toast. "I'm sorry," she mumbled.

"It's not about being sorry, Sev," Bucky said gently but firmly. "It's about taking care of yourself. You can't just skip meals and then run off to your room. What you're doing isn't safe."

"I know," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "But eating doesn't make me feel any better. I still feel empty, Papa."

Bucky reached across the table, placing his hand over hers. "I understand that, Sev. I really do. But your body needs food to function. If you don't eat, you're going to get sick. I can't lose you, okay? I need you to eat, even if it's just a little bit at a time."

He was ranting. Ranting to try to make her feel okay.

Sev looked up at him, her eyes filled with a mix of frustration and sadness. "It's just hard. Everything feels so hard."

"I know it is," Bucky said, squeezing her hand gently. "But you need to eat. You hear me? You need to eat."

"That's all I'm asking," he said, giving her a reassuring smile. "Now, let's try to eat some breakfast, alright?"

She looked at the plate, the food looking like it wanted to jump at her. No fucking way she was ever eating that. "No." She muttered.

"What?"

"No..." she said again.

Bucky sighed, running his hand through his hair. "What about the whole thing I just told you about...y'know what never mind. Why don't we eat at the same time." He tried to propose.

Sev felt like throwing a temper tantrum, but she wasn't gonna. Well, maybe if she had to. "No, I don't want to eat, I hate it, I hate this food, I hate it."

Now she was ranting.

Bucky breathed through his nose. "Eat it, Sev. I need you to take a bite." His voice was firm, like he was now desperate to get his point across.

"Screw you."

"What?"

She regretted speaking to him in such a tone. Or speaking to him at all. She stammered. "Sorry, I just mean, no."

Bucky stifled a small chuckle. He was getting a taste of mean Sev for the very first time. "Screw you?" He said, amused.

"Sorry..."

Bucky closed his eyes. He needed to focus. He opened his eyes back up. He grabbed her plate and started to chop up her food into little pieces with a butter knife. The toast and everything.

"Eat." Once everything was all chopped he pushed the plate back to her. "You're going to eat." He said, his eyes narrowed.

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No!" She said, kicking his shin. "Stop trying to make me! I don't want this fucking food! I don't want it!"

Bucky looked at Sev with utter shock. This was the first violent thing she's ever done, well at least the first thing she wasn't forced into that was violent.

"I'm not asking you, I'm telling you." She did so, staring up at him like she was about to cry. Crybaby Sev. "Pickup the god damn toast as take a bite, because we're not leaving this table until you do."

Whoa. She thought. "No." She simply said. "We won't leave then."

He sighed running his hand through his hair again. "You know what happens to kids who don't eat? Or anybody who doesn't eat. They die, Sev. They shrivel up and they fall to the ground dead, because they didn't wanna eat their god damn toast."

Sev stared up at him. She had tears now running down her cheek. Why the hell was she crying again? Damnit, Sev. Bucky feels bad for ever raising his voice at her. "Can we please just eat together?" He asked her. "Please?"

She quickly wiped the tears from her cheeks. "No." She said, quietly.

Bucky was fed up. With a huff, he picked up her fork and stabbed a piece of toast with it. He put the fork towards her. "Open your mouth." He said, firmly.

"What?"

"Sev, open your mouth right now."

Sev's eyes widened, gentle parenting really wasn't working anymore, huh?

He put it closer to her mouth. "Ready? Want a count down?" He asked.

She shrugged. He was gonna do a countdown now.

"Three..."

"Two..."

"One..."

Sev opened her mouth and Bucky put the bite into her mouth. It wasn't as bad as she thought, she was not happy she did it though. She wanted to punch her papa in his face.

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