I walked into school Monday morning, with a little less knowledge of who I was. Who I was becoming after everything that happened on my birthday

Passing the glass cases, holding the foundation of Homewood High, the football trophies - this was painful knowing what they held on a pedestal and didn't recognize myself in the undeniably clear glass. This sharpened glass harbored the grave mistake since you could so easily see the golden trophies pretty foundations overran by dust, and that, oh that, was so filthy.

This morning I had gotten up extremely late due to lack of sleep, I rubbed my eyes and the mascara from the night before smeared around them, so I ultimately looked like a raccoon, but that wasn't why I couldn't tell who I was. This is what I know for a fact: I am Sydney Annie Jones. I am the only child of Ann Jones and Bishop Jones. I am seventeen years of age. As of, Monday, June 25th, 2015, those are facts. Even though I knew there were other things about me that were true, staring at the dry face staring back at me with raccoon eyes, those were the only things I could say out loud.

School was a fashion show in Homewood, so I contemplated not to showing up, but then again I made it my business to show up everyday - on the verge of insanity or not. You always dress up, show up, and never give up. And just like any high school, you have your cliques, I wasn't unknown in a sense that I was very known around Homewood, mostly for my impeccable fashion sense but partially because there had been a rumor when I was in grade 9 that I slept with Jackson Murphy.

I didn't socialize with everyone, but I feel like if my name was to come people would know who to look for.

When my sister Jo, graduated from Homewood, she was very well known - in the sense that she ran the school since her grade 9 year, partially because she drove a Porsche and carried Kate Spade purses, and her boyfriend wore Colombia and Vineyard shit, but mostly because she was mean as hell. After high school and 5 months of partying she decided that Sydney, Australia was her newest playground, moving out of the country and overseas. That was the last time I heard from Jo Josephine Jones.

Classes were short today and for so many reasons, they should not have been. I avoided as many meaningless conversations as I could, I never spoke to any one. It was Monday, Reese shouldn't have been at school. Denise "Reese" Carter isn't a believer in school straight out of the weekends. She didn't believe in it so, she shouldn't have been at school.

Reese the gorgeous one, who happiness looked good on. Speaking with a sort of intensity, powerful yet never understanding why the noise ceased once she spoke. She constantly got 'As' on writing assignments because she wrote with such an ease. People think it's bad to write the way you speak, but for her it works.

Not to mention she gets all the boys.

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The conversation in the car ride on the way home was very, very light between Reese and I, which was weird. We loved to talk - even in the middle of movies we contemplated what would happen at the end, bothering the people who sat in front of us.

Today, the red light seemed like it never wanted to change, like becoming a brighter, happier color would be the worst thing ever. My car jerked forward as a steadily pressed the brakes and gas at the same time.

Red wasn't dark, but green was lighter.

Today was not a good day, when my car completely stopped I knew I wouldn't get out of sunset alive.

In all of my year of driving I had never ran out of gas, today was a day of losses - I was losing the girl I had come to know as Sydney and now I was losing time because all my gas was out. I wasn't just pissed, I was embarrassed. I slammed the door to my blue Volkswagen, parked on the curb and ran across the street to the sidewalk before starting for the corner store.

Walking was definitely NOT my strong suit. Personally, I like to be motivated when walking preferably by clothes, cute purses and shoes. Preferably, in a air conditioned building. The mall.

It's always so hot in Florida, I mean when it rains it pours and when it's hot it's boiling. The weather here is ridiculous just like the folks who reside here.

Luckily I didn't reside in Florida, Homewood was a state all on its own, so me, I wasn't as ridiculous just a little unloved and a bit damaged. Those are the type of folks that reside in Homewood.The Floridians would ride with the top down on their cars and the men would whistle at the overgrown kid who car broke down almost a mile away, for amusement.

I remember thinking about stopping because he was kind of cute.

I remember stopping in my tracks because I really wanted his number.

I remembered thinking like the overgrown children, the ones who are full of hormones and only thinking about sex with boys.

That day of loses, I remember seeing a fat, pink foot turning the corner behind me from the glare of the man's mustang.

A sound that annoyed me a lot was the sound of nails on chalkboard, I motionlessly stood on the edge of the sidewalk as that very sound drug through one ear to the next. In through the left, out the right, constantly.

"Crazy chick!" The Floridian man said before speeding off in his year '14 mustang.

I feared turning around because to face the bunny. I knew he was getting closer. With every scrap on the pavement my heart sped up a little faster.

I remember not wanting to run because it'll only cause a scene but that's exactly what I needed because if everyone else saw this creep walking around in a 1000 degrees suit they'd know something was off about him. I, also, remember picking up my feet and running. Running past the bunny trying to get to Reese and my car.

He followed. I saw him standing there as I passed him, my mom told me to never look back when your running.It'll show your worried, you're scared the one your so focused on, behind you is the who'll soon get ahead. Once you turn around, she'd say. You've lost the race.

I panicked and had to turn around I needed to know if he was still behind me, dragging those big feet across the pavement in such an sadistic manner. I just showed I was worried, I was scared, he knew that, so like my mother use to say' he'd won that race.

I crashed onto the hood of the car, "Reese" I croaked out.

I pointed behind me, " that bunny was chasing me!" I cried. Literal tears. It felt like hot rain pouring from my eyes beginning to scar my face.

Reese eyes were big as she examined her best friend. She never spoke, she stood astonished by my shortcomings.

It was that day, everyone else started to think I'd lost my mind.