CHAPTER 24

HINDI NA TUMULOY si Blaze sa kusina nang makita sina Happy at King. Ipinagluluto ni King si Happy ng pancake at nakikita niyang masaya si Happy habang nakikipag-usap sa lalaki tungkol sa mga ginawa na nitong alahas na masasabi raw nitong weird. Parang may kung anong sumasakal sa puso niya kasi alam niyang hindi niya magagawa iyon kay Happy. Ang ipagluto ito.

They'd been in the same house for three days now and the pain was just getting severe and severe each day. And his anger, he was becoming livid everyday.

Napailing siya, saka natigilan sa paglalakad palabas ng bahay nang makita ang kanyang ina na nakatingin sa kanya.

Nilapitan siya nito. "Are you okay?"

Tumango siya.

His mom sighed. "Ideya mo 'to, Blaze, na dito patirahin si Happy habang nandito siya. At pumayag ako kasi gusto ko rin naman siyang makasama. Nahiya naman akong paalisin sila dahil lang may kasama siya."

Blaze shrugged. "It's okay, Mom. I just didn't think that she'll forget me that fast. I mean, sinabi na sa akin ni Lucky pero mapilit pa rin ako."

"Blaze..." Hinaplos nito ang pisngi niya. "If you're hurting, maybe it's best if you're not here. That, or we'll ask them to leave. It would be rude, but... Happy will understand." She sighed while shaking her head.

"Mom, I'm fine." Pinilit niyang ngumiti. "Let them stay."

"The most common lie word in human history. I'm fine."

Ngumiti lang si Blaze at nagkibit-balikat, saka malalaki ang hakbang na lumabas ng bahay. Gustong-gusto niyang magtrabaho para mawala sa isip niya ang nakikita sa araw-araw sa bahay nila pero off niya ngayon. Kaya naman nagmaneho na lang siya patungong BV pagkatapos tawagan sina Titus, Phoenix, Khairro, Andrius at Nate.

Nang makarating siya sa BV Hall, si Andrius pa lang ang nandoon.

"Hey," sabi niya.

"You look like shit," sagot nito.

Umupo siya sa isang bakanteng plastic na upuan, saka bumuga ng marahas na hininga.

"You don't look so good," sabi ni Khairro na kadarating lang. "Need anything, bud?"

"Please tell me this is important," sabi ni Phoenix na naglalakad papasok. "I'm in the middle of inventing something."

"I was playing with my kid," sabi ni Titus. "This better be good."

"I was making a cake when these two picked me up with a helicopter," wika naman ni Nate, saka napailing. "This better be important, Vitale. What is it?"

"I wanna kill someone," sabi niya.

Napatitig sa kanya ang mga kaibigan.

"Who?" agad na tanong ni Martinez.

"And?" Titus urged him to say more.

"But I can't." Blaze blew a loud breath. "He is Happy's boyfriend and she would be very sad if something bad happens to him."

Nagsalubong ang mga kilay ni Phoenix. "Your Happy has a boyfriend? And it's not you?"

Nag-iwas siya ng tingin. "She's not... mine anymore."

"Okay..." Andrius breathed out. "And this man is unharmed by you, right? Kasi naaalala ko pa ang ginawa mo sa sasakyan ni Reigo."

"At kay Oliveros," dagdag ni Khairro.

"Yes, and you go Drunken Master on us," Phoenix added.

"How come that you are calm?" tanong ni Titus. "We all know here that you're dangerous when you are jealous and that's what you are feeling right now. Seeing your woman with other man... man, that's torture."

Kumuyom ang kamay niya at nagtagis ang mga bagang. "I called you here because I'm gonna ask you to help me blow off some steam."

"Where's Blake?" tanong ni Sanford.

"Busy with his wife," sagot niya.

"Okay," sabi ni Nate na madaling kausap. Hinubad nito ang T-shirt na suot. "'Yon lang naman pala. Come on. We'll try not to beat you up so much."

Khairro tsked. "Gagawin mo kaming pain absorber. And this is one is literal." Napailing ito, saka hinubad ang uniform na suot at iniwan lang ang sleeveless shit sa ilalim niyon. "Why am I even friends with you? FYI, I'm on duty."

"Fuck you," sabi ni Phoenix na hinuhubad ang leather jacket.

"Fuck this." Ganoon din si Titus na hinubad ang coat na suot.

"Let's get this over with," sabi ni Andrius na inalis din ang uniform na suot. "May trabaho pa ako."

"Thanks," sabi niya. Tumayo siya mula sa kinauupuan at hinubad ang hindi nakabutones niyang polo, saka iniwan ang itim na sleeveless shirt. "Come on, don't hold back. I won't."

"Don't worry, bud." Nginisihan siya ni Titus. "We won't."

"Payback is a bitch," nakangiting sabi ni Sanford at ito ang unang sumugod sa kanya.

Mabilis niyang nasalag ang bawat suntok nito at sipa habang gumagalaw ang mga paa niya para pasukin ang depensa nito. Pero umatake na rin si Nate at mabilis ang bawat galaw nito. Nate hit his face first.

Blaze blocked Nate and Khairro's attacks and threw blow after blow of punches and kicks.

Then Andrius entered the fight, together with Titus and Phoenix.

One versus five.

Malakas niyang sinipa sa tiyan si Khairro at sinalag ang suntok ni Phoenix mula sa kanan. Gamit ang isa pang kamay, sinalag niya ang kamao ni Nate at hinila ito, saka sinipa sa dibdib. Binitiwan niya si Nate at lumipad ang paa niya sa braso ni Andrius pero nasalag nito iyon.

Andrius punched his knee, but he was quick to jump, used his other leg to unbalance Andrius and they both fell into the floor.

Blaze tsked before he kicked up from lying on the floor and to standing up on his feet in a second.

He remembered when King wrapped his arm around Happy's shoulder. It angered him even more than he was at that moment.

Maalas na tumama ang talampakan ng sapatos niya sa dibdib ni Nate ng ilang beses bago siya umikot at inatake si Phoenix. Nate staggered back, he faced Titus and released blow by blow of strong punches until Phoenix caught him from behind, stopping him. Blaze angrily slammed the back of his head on Phoenix's face to get away. Pagkatapos ay hinawakan niya si Phoenix sa braso at pinilipit 'yon, saka malakas na sinuntok.

"Fuck!" Phoenix hissed. "I thought we're just playing, you motherfucker!"

He remembered King cooking for Happy while he couldn't do it.

Blaze faced Titus again and continued attacking him. Blow after blow. He didn't hold back.

King carrying Happy to their room and Happy smiling.

His anger rose.

Humarang sina Andrius at Sanford pero mas mabilis siya sa dalawa. Madali niyang nasalag ang bawat atake ng mga ito. Sinuntok niya sina Andrius at Sanford sa parte ng tiyan na alam niyang matutumba ang dalawa sa sakit.

He was a doctor... he knew where to hit people fatally.

Nang bumagsak sina Andrius at Khairro, tumuon ang tingin niya kina Titus, Phoenix at Nate na nakapalibot sa kanya.

Nakangiwing panay ang tapik ni Nate sa dibdib nitong ilang beses niyang sinipa. "Now I know why the Vitale twins are scary."

Phoenix grimaced. "I think he broke my arm."

"He is angry," sabi ni Titus. "That's why he needs to blow off some steam to not kill Happy's boyfriend. That's why he called us. He's bottling this up. Let's not disappoint him, shall we?"

Sabay na tumango sina Phoenix at Nate at sabay-sabay na umatake sa kanya ang tatlo.

Titus, Phoenix and Nate didn't hold back. So did he. He fought like a madman— no, he fought like a jealous man.

"I'M TELLING YOU, HAPPY, he is mad." Pilit siyang pinapapaniwala ni King na galit si Blaze habang nasa kuwarto sila at nag-iisip siya kung paano kakausapin si Blake tungkol sa cell phone ni Midnight. "The other day, I was walking to the kitchen and he bumped my shoulder."

"An accident," sabi niya.

Hinubad ni King ang T-shirt na suot para ipakita sa kanya ang magkabilang balikat nito. "This doesn't look like an accident to me."

Napatitig si Happy sa namamaga nitong mga balikat. "Jesus Christ..."

King nodded. "He is not beating me up but I'm starting to think that he's beating me in his own little way. He had always bumped into my shoulder and it's stronger each time for three days now. He is mad. At me. For being your boyfriend." He tsked. "When your father asked me to do this crazy idea of him, I thought it was okay. But now? I don't think so anymore. I'm being beat up subtly, Young Miss."

Happy sighed. "I'll go get a first-aid kit."

Lumabas siya ng kuwarto nila para maghanap sa ibaba ng first-aid kit pero napatigil ang pagbaba niya sa hagdan nang makitang naglalakad papasok sa bahay si Blaze.

May sugat ito sa mga labi, may pasa sa mukha, namamaga ang kamay at dumudugo ang sugat nito sa kilay.

"Jesus Christ..." Nagmamadali siyang bumaba sa hagdanan at sinalubong ang lalaki. "What happened to you? Are you okay?"

Akmang sasapuin niya ang mukha nito para suriin iyon pero tinabig nito ang kamay niya at nilampasan siya. "Don't look at me like you care, remember?"

"But I do care," sabi niya, saka hinabol ito at humarang sa harap nito. "First-aid kit, mayroon ka ba?"

"In my room."

Maingat niyang hinawakan ang kamay ni Blaze, saka hinila ito patungo sa 'taas, patungo sa kuwarto nito.

"It's in my closet."

Tumango si Happy at pinaupo niya sa gilid ng kama si Blaze bago tinungo ang closet. Nang mahanap niya ang first-aid kit, bumalik siya kay Blaze at inumpisahan niyang linisin ang sugat nito.

Blaze flinched when she was cleaning the cut in his lips. "What happened sa iyo? Who did this sa iyo?"

"I was just blowing off some steam," sabi nito na hindi tumitingin sa kanya.

"Why are you blowing some steam?" tanong niya. "Are you mad?"

"Frustrated."

"Because of King? Sinabi niya sa akin 'yong bumping of his shoulder? Did you, ahm... sadya it?"

Sa halip na sagutin siya, mahina itong natawa. "Na-miss ko ang ka-conyo-han mo."

Maingat niyang pinahiran ng ointment ang mga pasa ni Blaze. "Answer my question, Blaze, please?" malumanay na pakiusap niya.

"Yes. Sinadya ko. Sorry about that." But he didn't sound sorry at all.

Tinapos niya ang paggagamot sa pasa at sugat nito sa mukha. At ang kamay naman nito ang pinagtuunan niya ng pansin.

Sa pagkakataong 'yon, umupo siya sa gilid ng tama, paharap sa lalaki. Maingat niyang hinawakan ang kamay nito at tiningnan 'yon. "You're the doctor," sabi niya, saka nag-angat ng tingin dito. "Diagnose yourself."

Blaze chuckled. "It's just swollen. Too much punching. It'll be fine but I can't operate with my hands like this. I'll be risking my patients lives so I'll be taking an off for a week until it's fully healed."

Happy sighed. "I'll get a cold compress—"

"I'm okay. I told you, don't give me any of your attention. Madamot ako, Happy, kapag ibinigay mo sa akin 'yan, hindi ko hahayaang ibigay mo rin 'yon sa iba. Go back to your boyfriend and leave me alone."

"Can't I stay as a friend?"

"Ayokong maging kaibigan ka. Iba ang gusto ko mula sa iyo. I want you to be my girlfriend, Happy. That's what I want from you."

Hinawakan niya uli ang kamay nito, saka dinala iyon sa mga labi niya. Hinalikan niya ang likod niyon bago tumingin sa mga mata ni Blaze. "Don't be mad and hear me out," pakiusap niya.

Blaze nodded. "Okay."

Happy smiled. "I've been thinking for the past few days since you confessed... I've been clearing my mind and asking myself what to do."

"And?" Blaze asked.

"As much as possible, ayoko ng paligoy-ligoy because it's confusing and it complicates things. Like now, I'm naguguluhan so let's settle this... you love me and I still like you. A lot. But to be your girlfriend, to be in a relationship with you, I don't know if I can do that. I still have what ifs in my mind, Blaze. So many what ifs and it's scaring me. If, and if, we commit, we have to be truly and fully committed to each other, not a half-baked commitment, Blaze, because we both deserve more than that.

"As I've learned from what I've been through with you, we have to be sure of our feelings so when we commit to each other, we can give our all. Kailangan nating i-make sure na we have the strength na ipaglaban ang isa't isa to anyone at sa kahit ano para hindi tayo magkasakitan. Naiintindihan mo ba ako?"

It took a couple of seconds for Blaze to slowly nodded.

"I care for you, Blaze," sabi niya sa lalaki. "Ayokong magkasakitan na naman tayo dahil minadali natin o hindi tayo sigurado sa nararamdaman natin tulad noong una. What we both deserve is a wholeheartedly commitment. At hindi ko alam kung kaya natin 'yong ibigay sa isa't isa ngayon. Hindi na tayo mga bata na basta-basta na lang papasok sa relasyon."

Blaze was just staring at her as she talked, like he was absorbing her words and understanding them. "And King?"

"King is ahm..." She really hated lying. Oh, well... "He's not my boyfriend. He's my bodyguard."

Namilog ang mga mata ni Blaze kasabay ng pagbakas ng iritasyon sa mukha nito. "What?!"

"It was Dad's idea... to pretend." Napangiwi siya. "Sorry for lying."

Unti-unting nawala ang iritasyon sa mukha ng lalaki, saka pinakatitigan siya. "Why are you telling me now that everything was just a pretense? I mean, selos na selos ako sa kanya. Don't you think I deserve being in pain for making you cry?"

Kumunot ang noo niya, saka umiling. "No one deserves to be in pain, Blaze. No one. You made a mistake, and I did too. Wala namang perfect na tao but we try to improve as hard as we could. At marami ka nang pinagdaanan na painful, I don't want to add another pain. At saka, I hate lying. It complicates everything. I'll just focus myself to you so I can decide if I can risk my heart for you and be in a relationship with you."

Napatango-tango si Blaze. "It's like courtship."

Tumaas ang kilay niya. "A what?"

"Parang nililigawan kita at hindi ka makapagdesisyon kung nakapasa ba ako sa panlasa mo."

Kumunot ang noo niya. "But it's not courtship, we're just two adults talking about how we feel and how we will deal with it like an adult. And also talking about the respect, commitment and affection that we deserve, unlike before which was the reason why I left and is now the reason why I'm scared to commit to you."

Blaze faced softened. "You're really into this deserve and worth it stuff. I like it."

Tumango siya, saka ngumiti. "I believe that everyone is worth it, and they deserve to be loved fully and wholly and that they should never settle for less. That's just my opinion though. Some would say that nagmamaganda lang ako or nagmamalaki or maarte, but I don't care. I know what I deserve and I know my worth as a person. You should too. It's either they take it or ... they leave it, but I will never say sorry for being who I am."

Natigilan si Happy at nahigit ang hininga nang bigla na lang inilapat ni Blaze ang mga labi sa labi niya at inangkin 'yon ng masuyong halik.

At nang pakawalan ang mga labi niya, napangiwi ito. "Sorry... can't help it. You sounded and looked like a badass when you're talking about self-worth. Alam mo talaga ang halaga mo. I like that about you. Sana kapag nagkaanak tayo, kaugali mo."

Napakurap-kurap siya kasabay ng pag-awang ng mga labi. "A-anak?"

"Yeah. Anak." Kinindatan siya nito, saka sumeryoso. "About what you said, about commitment, about each other, may tanong ako. How will you know if I'm worth risking your heart for if you won't commit to me? Paano mo nasisiguro na hindi natin kayang pumasok sa commitment ngayon kung hindi natin susubukan? Paano natin malalaman kung para ka sa akin at para ako sa iyo kung hindi natin susubukan? Alam kong hindi na tayo mga bata para magpadalos-dalos pero ayokong mag-aksaya ng oras. Life is short, Happy, trust me, I learn that the very hard way, so let's live it. Together. Be my girlfriend... please?"

Napatitig siya sa nakalahad na kamay ni Blaze, saka nag-angat ng tingin sa mga mata nito. "What if we fail... like the last time? Paano kung magkasakitan na naman tayo?"

"Happy, I am not going to make the same mistake twice. And we will never know that we can do it, that we can be happy together unless we try. I know that I'm not worth risking your heart for after what I've done to you, but you are. I'll risk my everything for you... to be with you. And I promise, I'll do everything I can, so that someday you'll tell me that I'm worth risking for too."

Happy stayed silent. Her heart was pounding so fast for Blaze.

"Subukan natin uli, Happy," pakiusap ni Blaze. "You said that happiness is a choice. Let me ask you now, do you feel happy without me?"

Umiling siya. "I was sad for the last three months... until I saw you again."

"Then I'm your happiness. So choose me."

Choose happiness. That was what she had always said to Blaze before. Ngayon siya naman ang kailangang mamili.

Umangat ang kamay niya, saka dahan-dahan niyang tinanggap ang kamay ni Blaze na nakalahad sa kanya. "I'm scared of what will happen, I have so many what ifs, so please, I beg you, don't make me regret this, Blaze. Because if I feel what I felt before, when you can't still see me, as me, and can't appreciate my worth, I will break this off and I will leave. Again. And this time, I'm not coming back."

Agad na tumango si Blaze. "I'll do it right this time."

She smiled. "No. We will do it right this time. We're in a relationship now and this is new to me but I think this is how it works. It's not just 'I' anymore, it's 'we.'"

Blaze leaned in to kiss her forehead. "I love you."

"I like you too."

Blaze chuckled. "Looks like I have to work harder for that I like you to be I love you."

Mahina siyang natawa, saka napailing. Pero nawala ang ngiti sa mga labi niya nang maalala ang usapan nila ng daddy niya.

"Oh, Jesus. Daddy will be very mad at me."

Blaze frowned. "Why?"

"Ayaw niyang magkaroon ako ng relationship with you."

Napangiwi si Blaze. "He hates me that much?"

Tumango siya. "Yes."

"Wow... well, we'll face him together."

That put back the smile on her face. "Thank you."

Blaze smiled back. "By the way, dito ka na sa kuwarto ko matutulog mula ngayon. Hindi mo naman pala boyfriend ang gagong haring 'yon."

"But—"

"Don't worry." Kinindatan siya nito. "Hindi naman kita lalandiin. I'll be a very good boy."

"Hindi mo talaga ako lalandiin? Totoo? Kaya mo?" hindi naniniwalang tanong niya.

Tumawa si Blaze at tumayo, saka pumasok ng banyo. "Hindi kita lalandiin, aakitin lang. Magkaiba 'yon."

Napailing si Happy, saka nagmamadaling lumabas ng kuwarto ni Blaze. May naalala siya habang dala ang first-aid kit para kay King. Siguradong kanina pa ito naghihintay sa kanya.

"What took you so long?" tanong ni King.

"May lumandi sa akin."

King frowned. "What?"

Umiling siya habang nangingiti. "Nothing."

Hindi pa siya natatapos sa paglalagay ng ointment sa balikat ni King nang pumasok si Blaze sa kuwarto nila nang hindi man lang kumakatok.

And Blaze just stormed to her closet, opened her trolly and then he put all her clothes inside, including her undies, before zipping it and carrying it outside. Silently.

"What did he just do?" nagtatakang tanong ni King sa kanya.

"I told him you're not really my boyfriend."

Parang nakahinga nang maluwag si King. "Thank you, Young Miss. Thank you for telling him the truth before he kills my shoulders."

Napangiti siya. "Blaze is a good man, King. But he is a beast when angry."

"Then go. Go to his room before he comes back here and beats the shit out of me. Not in a subtly way this time."

Tinapos niya ang paglalagay ng ointment sa balikat nito. "I'll talk to Dad first."

"What will you tell Master?"

"That I'm giving myself a chance to be with Blaze."

"And you think he'll like it?"

Umiling siya. "But at least he knows. I don't want to keep this from him."

Tumango si King. Siya naman ay inabot ang cell phone na nasa bedside table at tinawagan ang ama.

Five rings until the call ended, her father didn't answer.

She frowned. Was her father busy? It was unlike him to not pick up her call.

Sinubukan uli niyang tawagan ang ama.

One, two, there, until twenty calls—he never picked up. Mula nang magising siya sa coma, kahit kailan hindi nito inihiwalay ang cell phone para daw kapag tumawag siya, masasagot agad nito at matutulungan siya kung nangangailangan siya ng tulong.

She called her dad again. No answer.

"Something's wrong..." she whispered as worry consumed her. "Daddy..."

CECELIB | C.C.