CHAPTER 12

HINDI MAIPINTA ang mukha ni Blaze nang makasalubong ito ni Happy papasok sa ospital. Madilim ang mukha ng lalaki at masama ang tingin sa kanya na ikinakunot nang noo niya.

Ano na naman ang problema ng isang 'to? tanong ni Happy sa sarili.

Ilang araw na nga silang hindi nagkita dahil pareho silang abala, 'tapos ganito pa siya salubungin. Duty kasi ito palagi at papalapit na rin ang kasal nina Lucky at Blake kaya naman sobrang busy niya.

"Blazey—"

"Bakit si Reigo ang naghatid sa iyo?" Iritado ang boses nito.

Happy sighed before tapping Blaze's cheek. "Remember our compromise? No jealousy?"

Hindi nawala ang sama ng tingin sa kanya ng lalaki. "Bakit kasi kayo magkasama?"

"We're friends," sabi niya, saka nilampasan ito.

Agad naman siyang hinabol ng lalaki. "We're friends too!"

Happy looked at Blaze while walking. "Yes. We are. But you're different. Our friendship is different."

"Explain," Blaze demanded.

Happy rolled her eyes. "Reigo and I don't kiss."

"Really?" Wala na ang inis sa boses nito. "So, ako lang talaga ang nakahalik sa iyo?"

She smiled at him. "Yes. Just you. Now go away, I know you're on duty so be a badass doctor because I'm busy."

"I miss you!" pahabol na sabi ni Blaze sa kanya habang naglalakad siya at tumigil naman ito. "I haven't seen you in four days!"

Nangingiting umikot si Happy paharap sa lalaki habang humahakbang paatras. Nag-flying kiss siya bago umikot ulit paharap at malalaki ang hakbang na tinungo ang kuwarto ni Blake.

Kumatok muna siya bago binuksan ang pinto.

Napangiti siya nang makitang maayos na ang lagay ni Blake. Naghilom na ang mga sugat nito at halatang nakaka-recover na.

"Good afternoon!" nakangiting bati niya kina Blake at Lucky.

"Ate!" Agad na sinalubong siya ni Lucky at niyakap.

Nakangiting niyakap din niya ang kapatid at nang kumawala sila sa yakap ng isa't isa, inilabas niya ang phone na nasa clutch bag niya. Ipinakita niya ang naumpisahan na niyang disenyo sa reception area.

"Like mo ba?" tanong niya sa kapatid. "I can change it if you want another design—"

Napatigil siya sa pagsasalita nang pupugin ni Lucky ng halik ang pisngi niya, saka mahigpit siyang niyakap.

"Thank you so so much, Ate! Sobrang thank you talaga." Ihinilig ni Lucky ang ulo sa balikat niya. "Kung wala ka, baka hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa rin naayos lahat dahil nagbabantay rin ako kay Blakey. Kaya maraming-maraming salamat talaga, Ate."

Lucky's appreciation of her efforts made her smile. "You're welcome. By the way..." Tumingin siya kay Blake na nakamasid lang sa kanila ni Lucky. "Have you tried fitting your tuxedo? Does it fit? Is it okay?"

"Hindi pa," sagot ni Blake, saka bumangon ito at umupo sa gilid ng kama. "Kukunin daw ni Blaze mamaya pagkatapos ng shift niya para makita at maisukat ko."

"That's good." Pagkatapos ay bumaling siya kay Lucky. "Lahat ng dresses ay okay na. Hindi talaga ako nag-leave doon sa boutique ni Mrs. Furrer yesterday nang hindi dala lahat mula sa flower girl to groomsmen." She grinned. "Yes. I pressured them. But I want everything to be done days before the wedding para ang problem na lang is the church design. The food is okay na rin, the cake is fabulous, and everything is going according to plan. So, no worries, okay?" Nginitian niya ang kapatid. "Ako ang bahala sa kasal mo."

Lucky kissed her on the cheek again. "Thank you so, so much."

"No problem," tugon niya, saka nagpaalam na sa dalawa. "I have to go. I have to check the number of chairs and tables needed for the reception and of course, I have to send out the invitations! Goodness!"

Blake chuckled. "Dahan-dahan lang. Isang linggo pa naman."

"Or I could help?" suhestiyon ni Lucky.

"You already did, little sis, by picking the colors and approving everything. But this na gagawin ko baka mapaano ka kasi it's heavy workload. Mapapagod ka. Ayokong i-risk ang heart mo. Rest here and I'll do everything as promised."

Lucky beamed at her. "Thank you again, Ate."

"Welcome, lil' sis," sabi niya, saka nagpaalam na sa dalawa dahil aasikasuhin pa niya ang ipinaulit na imbitasyon ng kapatid. Lucky already said yes to the design she sent her the other day. She had to make sure that it would be done in two days time.

Nang makalabas ng kuwarto ni Blake, natigilan si Happy nang makita si Blaze na nakasandal sa pader na kaharap ng pinto ng kuwarto. Nakapamulsa ito sa doctor's robe na suot, saka nakatitig sa kanya.

"May need ka sa akin?" tanong niya sa lalaki.

Umalis ito sa pagkakasandal sa pader, saka inilang hakbang ang distansiya nila. "Sabi mo hindi mo ako iiwasan."

She frowned. "Hindi nga."

"Kung ganoon, bakit apat na araw na kitang hindi nakikita?"

"I was busy," paliwanag niya, "I have so many ginagawa for Lucky and Blake's wedding. I don't want na patulungin si Lucky baka mabinat siya. She needs to be healthy in her own wedding. You can ask Tita Beth if you don't believe me—"

Happy's words stopped when Blaze wrapped his arms around her waist to hug her softly.

"I miss you," Blaze whispered.

And there goes her heart, beating so darn fast. "Me too."

"Really? Eh, hindi mo nga ako mabisi-bisita rito sa ospital." May pagtatampo sa boses nito. "'Yon ba ang na-miss?"

"We're both busy, Blazey," she answered.

"I don't believe you." Nagtatampo talaga ito.

Happy rolled her eyes before pulling away from his embrace and looking at Blaze. "Na-miss nga kita. 'Di ba I answer your calls naman when you're calling? Nagre-reply ako sa text message mo if you're texting. See? Hindi kita iniiwasan."

Bitterness was written all over Blaze's face. "Liar. Oo, sinasagot mo nga ang tawag ko para sabihing busy ka, sinasagot mo ang text ko para rin sabihing busy ka. 'Yan ba ang hindi iniiwasan?"

"I was busy," giit niya.

"So am I," sabi ni Blaze na nanlaki pa ang mga mata. "But I'm willing to make time for you."

"Aww, my big baby..." Inayos niya ang necktie nitong tabingi at hindi maayos ang pagkakabuhol, saka tumingin sa mga mata nito. "Dinner?" She smiled at him. "Hindi na ako busy mamayang gabi."

Blaze's bitter face actually lit up and his lips twitched. "You'll cook for me?"

Nakangiting tumango siya. "Oo. Ano'ng gusto ng ma bitch ko?"

Agad na sumama ang mukha ni Blaze. "Stop calling me that."

She stuck out her tongue at him. "You're eating my food, that makes you ma bitch."

Blaze sighed. "Whatever. I'd like to taste your version of chicken curry or nilagang baboy."

Napangiti siya sa karupukan nito sa pagkain. "Then I'll cook that for ma bitch. Now... I have to go and deal with the wedding invitations, then I'll text you if I'm not busy anymore so you can come over to my hotel room."

"Okay." Blaze smiled. "My shift ends at three this afternoon. I'm all yours after that until tomorrow afternoon at three PM. But I'll just be on call so I'm still yours until the next day."

Lumapad ang ngiti niya. "I like the 'I'm yours part.'"

"Really?" Lumapit ang mukha nito sa mukha niya, saka humaplos ang mga labi sa mga labi niya. "I really miss you, Happy. Good thing I was on duty and I have lots of cases to keep me sane. But I still can't focus. I keep thinking of you and I can't stop myself."

Hinalikan niya ang lalaki sa pisngi, saka nginitian. "Mamaya na 'yan, kailangan ko nang umalis."

Parang napipilitan na binitawan ni Blaze ang baywang niya. "Fine. Ingat ka."

"You too," nakangiting sabi niya bago nagmamadaling umalis.

Kailangan niyang tapusin agad itong pag-aasikaso ng imbitasyon. She couldn't wait to cook for Blaze again. She missed dining with him... and teasing him.

BLAZE'S SHIFT was supposed to end at three PM. But he just finished charting his last two cases and it was now five PM and he was beat. He pushed himself to move. Tinungo niya ang kuwarto ng kakambal at pumasok nang hindi kumakatok.

Naabutan niyang nanonood ng TV si Blakey at wala si Lucky. Nang makapasok siya, binabaan nito ang volume ng TV, saka itinuon ang atensiyon sa kanya.

"You look beat," pansin nito.

Blaze sighed and dropped himself on the edge of Blake's bed. "I'll be fine. Anyway, bukas ko na lang kukunin ang tuxedo mo. Ang toxic ng last case ko, napagod ako."

"Then rest."

"Later," sabi niya, saka lumipat ng upo sa mahabang sofa. "Dito muna ako." Hindi pa kasi nagte-text si Happy.

"Suit yourself," sabi ni Blake, saka bumalik sa panonood ng TV.

Napatitig siya sa kakambal habang tinatanong ang sarili kung may alam ito tungkol sa nangyayari sa kanila ni Happy.

Blaze took a deep breath. "Blakey, I'm a mess."

Tuluyan nang ini-off ni Blake ang TV, saka bumaling sa kanya. "I know."

Bumuga siya ng marahas na hininga. "Remember when I told you to not start something with Lucky if you're still stuck in your past because you'll hurt her?"

Blake nodded. "Yeah. Can't forget that one."

Mapait siyang ngumiti. "I'm eating my own words now, Blakey. I started something while I'm still stuck."

"Is it Happy?"

Tumango siya, saka tumingin sa kakambal. "Paano mo nagawa 'yon? Paano ka nakaahon sa nakaraan mo? Paano ka nakapag-move on?"

"I have my reason."

He frowned, eager to know. Maybe it could help him. "What?"

"Not what." Blakey smiled. "It's who."

He blinked. "Who?"

"Lucky," sagot nito at mas lumapad pa ang ngiti. "She's my reason. Well, lahat naman ng ginagawa ko, siya ang rason. But at that time, I was so scared to lose her, not because she makes me happy and she lights up my dark world, but because she's Lucky, my positive gummy bear and I can't see myself in the future without her by myside."

Nagbaba siya ng tingin. "I'm scared to lose Happy too."

"Are you?"

Agad niyang ibinalik ang tingin kay Blaze. "Yes. Why do you sound doubtful?"

Blake shrugged. "I'm just wondering if you're scared to lose Happy because you love the idea of her making you happy and being there for you. I'm wondering if you just love the idea of Happy being around and knowing that she can do things, for you, to be happy and to stop being miserable."

Blake's words silenced him.

"Blaze...." Blake looked deep into his eyes. "Ako naman ngayon ang magsasabi sa iyo. Let go of Cassie. Tama na. It's been eleven years."

"Where do I start?" he asked in a whisper.

"There." Itinuro ni Blake ang ulo niya. "Condition your mind, accept what has to be accepted. It's not easy, I'm telling you. Sarili mo ang kalaban mo rito at ang alaala n'yong dalawa. Then work your way down." He pointed his heart. "Forgive what has to be forgiven. Necessarily, forgive yourself. That's the key, and everything will follow."

"'Yon ba ang ginawa mo?"

Blake nodded. "You can do it too. Mahihirapan ka nga lang, pero kung gusto mo talaga, kakayanin mo 'yon. Remember what you used to say to me way back then?"

Blaze frowned. "What?"

"Kapag gusto, gagawa ka ng paraan. Kapag ayaw, gagawa at gagawa ka ng dahilan."

He stilled. That hit hard.

Mahina siyang natawa nang walang buhay. "I have just been slain by my twin."

Blake chuckled. "Kuya mo ako, remember? It's my job to slay you, you motherfucker." Then he tsked. "It's not gonna be easy for you but man up, okay? You have two balls, that must've meant something, right?"

Blaze grimaced. "Don't used the two balls card on me. I don't even know what that means."

"That means be a man, you idiot." Blake hissed at him. "Only men have balls so be a fucking man and make your balls proud."

His grimace turned into a fit of laughter. "Yeah. I have two balls."

Blake tsked. "Good talk?"

He nodded while chuckling. "Good talk." Then he pointed the bed. "I'm tired. Puwede bang tumabi ng higa sa iyo diyan?"

It was Blake's turn to grimace. "No way. That's so gay. Find your own bed." Pagkatapos ay itinuro nito ang dextrose na wala nang laman. "And replace it, will you? This time, huwag mo akong ipasa sa nurse. Sasaksakin kitang gago ka." Itinaas pa nito ang pupulsuhan para ipakita sa kanya ang IV nito. "And my wrist is swollen, do something about it."

Napailing na lang si Blaze, saka tumango at lumabas ng kuwarto ni Blakey kahit pagod na pagod siya. Dumeretso siya sa nurse station at kumuha ng mga kakailanganin para palitan ang IV ng kakambal, saka dextrose na rin.

Nang makabalik siya sa kuwarto ni Blake, umupo siya sa gilid ng kama nito at pinalapit ito sa kanya.

"Be careful, okay?" May takot sa boses ni Blake.

Mahina siyang natawa. "You're still afraid of needles?"

Blake glared at him. "My heart is pounding, what do you think?!"

Blaze was laughing at his twin as he put on a glove to remove the cannula from Blake's wrist. "Give me your other arm," sabi niya sa kakambal.

He obliged slowly. "Do I really need this? Kumakain naman na ako—"

"Shut up, Blakey. You need this."

Blake gulped when he ready the green cannula—the needle—that Blake disliked. Then he changed his glove—for safety purposes.

"Fuck. That's a scary needle," bulong ni Blake.

Natawa siya. "It's a normal needle, Blakey. Stay still," sabi niya habang sinusuri ang pupulsuhan nito para sa ugat na kailangan niya.

Blake blew a loud breath. "Matagal pa ba?"

"Stay still," sabi niya. "I got it."

Blaze immediately put the tourniquet just further above Blake's wrist when he found an IV site then he disinfected it with cotton that had alcohol in it.

"That needle is really too big!" Blake hissed again. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack?!"

"No. I'm trying to insert a cannula to your fucking vein, you fucker," kalmado niyang sagot.

Bumaba ang tingin ni Blakey sa tray na dala niya kung nasaan naroon lahat ang mga gamit na kinuha niya sa nurse station para sa cannula insertion.

"What's that? That small one—yes, that." Inginuso nito ang mga labi sa ibang cannula na iba ang sukat ng karayom.

Nagsalubong ang mga kilay niya at pinulot ang kulay-violet na cannula—ang may pinakamaliit na karayom. "Ito?"

"Yes! Use that," utos ni Blake sa kanya.

Ibinalik niya sa tray ang violet na cannula. "No way. That's for babies. Damulag ka na. And it easily gets dislodge so no."

"Fuck." Blake blew a loud breath. "That one. 'Yong pangalawa sa pinakamaliit?"

Pinulot ni Blaze ang kulay-yellow na cannula. "This? This is for pediatric you fucker! Hindi ka toddler gago."

"Then use that blue one!" singhal sa kanya ng kakambal. "And don't give me that pediatric crap! Sasaksakin kita, Blaze. I'm not kidding around!"

Blaze tsked and changed the cannula—the blue one. "This needle is still for kids. Pero dahil naaawa ako sa iyong gago ka, sige na lang."

Blake breathed out. "That'll do. Thanks."

Napailing siya na natatawa.

"Hurry up!" Blake hissed at him again.

Instead of hurrying up, he deliberately took his time before inserting the needle on Blake's skin, to his vein.

"Fuck!" Blake hissed again while his eyes are squeezed shut. "Fuck! Fuck!"

"Goodness, Blakey, that needle was for kids! It's not even for you but because I pity you, that's the one I chose!"

"Oh, fuck you!"

Blaze tsked.

When the needle was already on Blake's veins, Blaze pulled the needle half way to check for blood back flow. Nang may makita siyang dugo, doon niya ipinasok ang buong cannula at nilagyan ng micropore tape para siguruhing hindi iyon matatanggal o magagalaw. Pagkatapos ay ikinonekta niya ang IV line sa cannula at inalis ang tourniquet. Then he opened the regulator to check if the fluid was flowing well.

"Is it done?" Blake asked while his eyes were closed.

Pigil niya ang sariling matawa. "Give me a minute."

Blaze looked at his wristwatch while he regulated its drop per minute. When it was all done, he put more micropore to secure the cannula.

"Done," he announced.

Blake finally opened his eyes and looked at his IV. "Fuck. I hate needles."

"I love them." Blaze grinned. "I can poke people with it—legally and they don't even get mad."

Blake glared at him. "I hate you."

"No, you don't." Tumayo siya, saka lumabas ng kuwarto ni Blake para itapon ang basura at ang gloves na ginamit, pagkatapos ay bumalik uli sa kuwarto.

"Still breathing?" biro niyang tanong sa kakambal.

Blake showed him his middle finger. "Fuck you."

"You're welcome," natatawang tugon niya, saka natigilan nang tumunog ang kanyang cell phone.

It was either a text or a chat. Sa isiping baka si Happy na 'yon, agad niyang inilabas ang cell phone sa bulsa ng doctor's robe, saka tiningnan ang mensaheng natanggap.

Nope. It was not from Happy. It was from the Jumbo Hotdog Club. Nag-iingay na naman ang group chat nila.

I should off my data.

He was just gonna ignore it when someone tagged him. He sighed and opened the group chat.

Phoenix Martinez: Maniningil kami ni T, @Bigbaby, masakit pa ang katawan namin hanggang ngayon sa ginawa mo!

Titus Morgan: @Bigbaby, barbecue and beer will do.

Blaze blinked as he read Phoenix and Titus' chats again.

Big baby? Is that me?

His teeth gritted.

Big baby: Who the fuck changed my name?!

Phoenix Martinez: 👉🏻 @BlakeVitale he did. 🤣

Big baby: 🖕🏻 fuck you!

Titus Morgan: 🤧 I'm sick because of you, @Bigbaby, you broke my rib, you motherfucker! I will kill you if we see each other again. I was just holding back when we fought you animal!

Phoenix Martinez: @Titus, want some soup? I'm cooking.

Titus Morgan: Give me some 🍜

Phoenix Martinez: What's that emoticon? I don't have that emoticon! Why is that? 🤬

Titus Morgan: That's a noodle with soup emoticon... I think. May nagbebenta niyan sa Japanese resto na gusto ko. 'Yong kinainan natin last month noong nasa Manila tayo. My whole body is aching!

Phoenix Martinez: Rest then, bukas na natin pagbayarin si @Bigbaby.

Titus Morgan: Is that your helicopter I'm hearing?

Phoenix Martinez: Yeah, I'm gonna buy you that noodle. @Bigbaby, you'll pay us with barbecue and beer. Tomorrow or else will go Jason Bourne on your ass!

Napailing si Blaze, ini-off ang mobile data niya, saka masamang tiningnan ang kakambal. "You change my name to big baby?"

Blake stilled before whistling. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He tsked. "I should have used that green cannula."

He sighed again and was about to drop himself on the long sofa when his phone beeped. A smile immediately appeared on his lips when he saw that it was from Happy.

From: My Happiness

Blazey, I'm in the hotel room na. I already started na mag-cook sa gusto mong kainin. Punta ka na lang dito kapag hindi ka na busy. 😘

The emoticon on the last part made him grin.

He replied while still grinning.

To: My Happiness

See yah. 😘😘😘

Ibinalik niya ang cell phone sa bulsa sa likod ng pantalon na suot, saka nagpaalam sa kakambal. "I'm leaving."

"Use protection!" Blake shouted as Blaze stepped out from his twin's room.

Napailing na lang siya, saka hinubad ang doctor's robe habang naglalakad palabas ng ospital. Then he took off his tie while walking towards the parking lot.

Nang makasakay sa kotse niya, itinapon niya sa backseat ang doctor's robe at necktie, saka itinupi ang manggas ng polo hanggang sa siko. Inalis din niya ang pagkakabutones ng dalawang butones sa pinakataas ng kanyang polo.

Then he drove off towards Happy's hotel. He couldn't wait to dine with Happy again.

God, why did I miss her so much? 

CECELIB | C.C.