I didn't go back to sleep for the rest of that night, and I don't think Jordan did either.

When the sunlight started to stream through my window, I picked myself up out of bed. "I'm going to take a shower." I mumbled to Jordan, knowing good and well he was still awake on the other half of my bed.

I didn't wait for a response, shuffling over to the linen closet to grab a clean towel and then continuing my shuffle into our bathroom.

Once I turned the water on, I waited for the steam to fill up the room before I got in. I wanted the water to rinse away the guilt that clung to my skin. And Cooper's blood on my hands.

Even though the water was hot enough to burn me, I shivered under it. In my mind, I kept replaying that stupid dream I had.

The gun in my hand.

Cooper's body just laying there.

My hands stained red with his blood.

Again, I could feel an anxiety attack coming on. I sunk to my knees as my vision went blurry with tears and my breath left me.

Some point on my way down, I knocked a shampoo bottle over and when it hit the floor, it sent my straight into a full blown panic attack. Reality washed away as I was transported back to that day a couple of months ago.

Within seconds I was reliving the pain of losing my brother all over again, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

My tears were rivers running down my face, mixing with the hot water that was hitting me.

Like last night, Jordan burst into the room. "Daytona are you okay?"

I tried to answer him, but I couldn't get any words out. As a matter of fact, I couldn't get any air in. Suddenly the steam from the shower was suffocating me and my vision started to go black.

"Shit Daytona." Jordan slid the curtain back and covered his eyes so he wouldn't see anything he wasn't supposed to. He reached blindly into the shower to try and find the knob to turn off the water, but he missed and stuck his hand straight into the hot water. "What the hell? Are you trying to boil yourself to death?" Eventually he found the knob and turned off the water. Grabbing my towel he covered me with it as he tried to get me to stand.

My knees were still to weak and I fell back down. Everything was overwhelming me and I still couldn't catch my breath.

"Here goes nothing." He braced his hand against my back and dropped his other one under my legs and lifted me. Not even showing the strain of my weight, he carried me to my room and set me on the bed.

"Look at me Daytona. You have to breath okay? Deep breath in, now let it out. In, out." His eyes showed a far deeper concern then I ever saw in Logan.

I followed along as best as I could.

"There you go. In, now out. In, now out. Calm down."

Shortly I was able to breath normally again and my tears had stopped, but I still sat there, numb and unmoving.

"Two panic attacks in less then twenty four hours. Impressive. That has to be a record or something." Jordan still stood in front of me, watching me with his icy blue eyes.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about Daytona." He sat down next to me careful not to touch me, still unsure of exactly what was going to set me off.

"I'm sorry that you constantly have to babysit me and I'm sorry that I constantly come between you and any type of fun. I'm sorry I dragged you into this and I'm sorry you ever met me."

"Daytona look at me." I turned and faced Jordan who had become incredibly serious rather quickly. "Logan gave me an option when he told me what was up. I chose to involve myself. I chose this. Okay? There were plenty of opportunities where I could've turned away and kept myself out of danger, but I wanted to help you.

"And as for you getting in the way of my fun, trust me, if that mattered to me, would I be sitting here with you right now?"

I shook my head no.

"Exactly. So don't apologize for something that's not your fault okay? You didn't ask for this to happen to you."

"You're right." I crossed my arms to hide my shaking hands.

Even though Jordan said it wasn't my fault, deep down I knew he was wrong.

"What do you say we get some fresh air. Would you like that?" Again I nodded my head. Maybe getting out of this apartment and reintroducing myself to the real world was just what I needed.

"Alright, well I'm going to go get dressed for the day okay? I'm right across the hall if you need anything." When he pushed himself up, his hand just barely brushed against my exposed thigh, but it was enough to send an electric shock through me.

I jumped off the bed, "Jordan wait,"

He stopped mid step and turned around. I snaked my arms under his and tightly hugged him. "Thank you."

He wrapped his arms around me, almost like he could keep me from shattering if he held me tightly enough. "Always Daytona."

I let him go so he could get changed and I also started to go through my clothes to figure out what I wanted to wear. It was nearly April and in Austin, the weather started to heat up a little. So I went with a pair of jeans and one of the only tank tops I brought with me. Of course it had to be my Paramore one.

I sighed as I pulled it on, willing all the memories attached to it to leave. I couldn't live through the loss of two people like that. It was too much.

"You ready?" Jordan peeked his head into my room.

"Yeah." I pushed any and all emotions into the vault in my head and willed myself to smile. "I'm ready."

~~~~🌻~~~~

We went and grabbed a bite to eat at a Korean Barbeque place. When we were done with that, we just walked around outside, quite literally getting some fresh air.

Our walk was nice. We talked about Jordan's job and how his bar was a lot less troublesome then the one below us.

"Honestly, Danni is an angel. I don't think I would be able to spend as much time with you if it wasn't for her."

Again I went quiet.

I was glad that Jordan had a friend, but he was always having to babysit me and because of that, he wasn't able to actually have a friend.

"She asked me to the movies today," he continued. Oblivious to my silence, "but I told her since I was off I wanted to actually do something with you."

Way to go Daytona. Jordan could've been out having fun with his friends if it were not for you. Who knows, him and Danni might've even started to date. But you ruined that for him.

"You should," I blurted out loudly, "go to the movies I mean."

Jordan lowered his eyebrows in confusion. "I literally just said I wanted to do something with you."

"Well we're doing something now. So what's stopping you from going later?"

"Please don't tell me this is about you feeling guilty for me not hanging out with her. Because I already told you, if I wanted to I would."

"No, not at all," I lied, "think of it as my way of apologising to her for always making her cover the end of your shift. I'll even lend you my debit card to pay for everything.

Jordan still looked at my with disbelief written all over his face, but he knew he wouldn't win an argument with me so he turned away. "Fine."

"Okay."

We finished our walk in silence.

When we arrived back at out apartment, it was late in the afternoon already. Jordan and I stopped at a few more places. He finally got himself some new clothes and I also picked out some different summer clothes.

He had called Danni while I was trying on a romper and they made plans to go to the movie at 5:30 and dinner after.

I pretended to not care. But I did. Oh man did I care a lot. I did want to spend time with Jordan. I did want to go out with him, but I couldn't bring myself to make that selfish choice.

At 5:15 Jordan left me with the instructions to "call me if you need anything" and to "not throw a huge party." I assured him that neither of those things would happen.

And at 6:08, I couldn't stand being alone any longer so I called Tony and asked if he wanted to hang out. He said yes. I asked what he wanted to do. And like always, he said go eat.

So here I was, walking down the sidewalk going to meet Tony at the same Korean Barbeque place I was at earlier.

Outside, I felt refreshed. On edge, but refreshed. The wind blew my hair back and for just a second, I felt what it was like to be normal Daytona-

That was until a pigeon divebombed me.

"What the hell! Get out of my face you stupid bird!" The pigeon kept flapping it's wings in my face and clawing my cheeks.

Not soon enough, the pigeon finally realized that my face was not a launch pad and it finally flew away.

"Stupid freaking pigeons," I continuously muttered to myself as I finished the five minute walk to the restaurant.

I walked in and already saw Tony waiting for me at a booth. "Woah, what happened to you?"

"A pigeon attacked me." I grumbled, sliding into the booth. The bruise on my stomach flared up when I did that but I gritted my teeth and pretended that I felt nothing.

"Like I always say, never underestimate the might of a pigeon." Tony sipped his drink and had a stupid philosophical look on his face.

"I have never heard you say that before."

"Please," he started, taking another sip, "I say it all the time."

I laughed a little, "Yeah okay."

For the next couple hours, Tony and I talked about (almost) every thing under the sun.

"So about the whole fake girl friend thing. The party is in a few weeks. We would need to leave April 11, is that okay?"

"Oh yeah," I popped a couple of fries into my mouth, "that's fine."

"And you're sure Jordan is okay with you coming with me?"

I nodded my head up and down very dramatically. "We talked it through this morning and he's okay with it."

"Awesome! You really are the best Daytona."

"I know." I flipped my hair over my shoulder and we both laughed a little too loud. I happened to glance down at his phone. "Geez, it's 8:20 already?"

"Wow, I didn't realize it had gotten that late," he said. "I've got to get going. I'm volunteering early tomorrow morning and closing tomorrow night so I'll be up and on my feet all day. I'll see you soon." Tony waved by as he got up and left.

With a yawn, I figured I would just finish my fries and then start heading home. The sun was just about set and the sky was transitioning into a deep blue.

Once I was done, I waved goodbye to the people who continually helped Tony and I every time we ordered and started home.

It was only a short walk, but even so, the fact that it was dark put me even more on edge.

I unlocked my phone to send a quick text to Jordan asking if he wouldn't mind meeting me half way, but before I could even open iMessage, my phone died.

"Just great." I stuffed my phone into my pocket with a huff. "You're okay Daytona. You can do this. These alleyways coming up are no big deal. There's no one there."

Boy was I wrong. Before I even passed it, I knew I was in trouble.

"What do we have here boys?" A group of five guys, all extremely drunk, stumbled over to me.

"Stay back." I filled my voice with as much strength as I could muster, but I feared it wasn't enough.

"Wait. I recognize you," one of the ones in the back spoke up. "You're the girl who kept me from baggin' that chick at the bar." He walked forward and I realized I was in even more trouble than I thought.

Out of all the people I could've run into, it had to be him. Of course. Nonetheless, I stared at the guy who was the first of many to threaten my life since I moved here to Austin. "Ah, I see it's you Dicks-For-Brains. We meet again."

"This time little girl, your boyfriend isn't going to be here to stop me." He cracked his knuckles and reached into his pocket pulling out the same switch blade as before.

"Again with the switch blade," I groaned, "Can't you, like, spice it up or something? What about a hunting dagger or something. Even a taser would've been cooler." Word by word I watched his composure unravel.

"How's this for spice?" One of the other guys pulled a gun out of his waistband and I froze.

No, no, no! Get your shit together Daytona! Now is not a time to freak out.

My breaths started to come quicker, but I forced myself to keep a level head.

"Not so tough anymore, huh?"

I swallowed my fear. I could get through this. "On the contrary, I just fell asleep waiting for something interesting to happen."

"She has a mouth on her. Why don't we start with that."

Okay Daytona, now's a good time to fight or run.

There was no way I was going to run, so with my feet shoulder width apart, I raised my fists.

"Ooh you're going to fight us. How scary." Damn patriarchy.

I mirrored the Dicks-For-Brains and cracked my knuckles. "Five on one? I like those odds. Bring it on boys."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What?!!! Two chapters in one day??? Can it be?????

You best believe it!

Also these two chapters aren't edited so fair warning lol

Alright. I'm gonna keep these A/N short.

Love you guys!
~May C. ❤😘