Ouma's POV:

Trust is a hard thing to give someone. And is easily destroyed.

It had been a week since Kiibo had heard the truth on what really happened, and has since ever since been by my side as if a passive bodyguard.

The class must have been curious about the sudden change in behavior, because while Kiibo never ignored me or anything like that he always was content with someone else helping me.

However now he insisted that all activities involving him meant that I had to come to.

All this because he knows...is he trying to protect me? It's kind of late for that...oh well...it makes him feel safer I guess.

What really bothered me though was Saihara, he never told me about the diary, only revealing it to help Kiibo with his guilt and grief.

And despite the two of us still spending time together he has never brought it up again, no matter how much I asked about it and frankly it's annoying.

If I could read it myself that would've been perfect...all I would've had to do then is steal it somehow...

I laid my head on the desk disappointed in my own uselessness.

Saihara is risking his life to help me reveal the truth to the public...he's going to be the one to make this case and end it all...I shouldn't be selfish for wanting more...I can't want more or he'll leave me...

I don't want to be alone anymore.

Finally the average routine I had settled myself into continued, Kiibo walking us home. He seemed cautious, as he talked with Akamatsu on the way, his voice unsure and he often took long pauses as if distracted, if Akamatsu noticed which she must have she didn't comment on it instead just continuing to carry on with the conversation.

"Oh that reminds me, Akamatsu I can't come shopping next week with you" Kiibo quickly realized, "aww...how come?" She asked bummed out.

"Uhm...unless you're inviting more than just me I just can't..." he said, his voice was laced with an unsung fear.

I recognized that tone.

"Huh? I mean I can ask Tojo, she mentioned needing some tea cups or something like that during class, I can invite her if you want but what's wrong if it's just the two of us?" She asked.

"There's...it's just been a bit dangerous lately...that's all" Kiibo said, "I just feel safer when I'm with larger groups...I'm sorry" he apoligizes.

I tightened my fist.

~-~-~-~

'Why are we here?' I asked, Saihara had taken me outside today only to lead me to mysterious location, the entire car trip he had barely said a word.

"Uhm...promise you won't be mad?" He asked, I raised an eyebrow 'why would I be mad?' I asked concerned.

Saihara took a deep breath as I felt him holding my hand as if bracing either me or himself.

"I might have taken you to a therapist...." he confessed.

No.
No.
No.

'Can I go home now?' I asked, slightly annoyed with him "wait! I promise I have a good reason for this ok!" Saihara pleaded with me.

'I doubt that' I told him, 'seeing as you've kept other things a secret from me, like the diary' I reminded.

"Ouma there's a reason for that as well and I wasn't intending to keep it a secret forever, I just wanted to fully read it first and take notes then I was going to show you, I just needed to make sure I knew what questions to ask you" he told me, his voice wavering.

I clenched my fist tighter, a tiny amount of guilt filled me.

'I don't want to be here though' I told him, "Ouma...I'm going to be honest and tell you. I can't always help you with what you're going through, I might say the wrong thing or hurt you and I don't want that...I'll still always be there for you, it's just...I thought it would be good for you to have someone professionally help you, trust me she's amazing. She really helped me when I lost my mother" he told me.

....

'Does she know?' I asked, "no...she knows what everyone else thinks, the suicide..." he admitted, "you can tell her since she's sweared to confidentiality though?" He suggested.

I shook my head.

I couldn't even tell Kiibo when I knew him my whole life until he heard by accident. What makes him think I could ever be able to tell a complete stranger?

"Honestly I'm surprised you didn't already have therapy..." Saihara admitted, 'my family doesn't have a good medical insurance, we were poor and lived paycheck to paycheck'.

"Oh....I'm so sorry" Saihara apologized, 'why are you sorry? You didn't do anything, it's not...well it used to ne worse when I was younger not so much anymore'

'When I was comatosed some of DICE's family gave money to my mom so I could live...thinking back I don't know what to think considering how many times I tried...

'I nearly made them waste their money' I admitted. "They never wasted it Ouma...I'm so glad you're here...I'm so glad we got to meet...don't forget that" he said.

...

"Ouma Kokichi?" The receptionist called, I'm ready to go home now.

"You got this Ouma" Saihara told me, as he handed me off.

No, come back.

SOS.

SOS!

The door was shut behind me, the scent of a lavender candle was in the room with something else creating a calm aura.

"Oh hi! It's nice to meet you, my name is Kuri Maiko" a woman introduced, she didn't sound old like I expected. She might even be around our age.

I didn't respond as she seemed to sit down on a nearby couch, "there's some chocolate in front of you if you want, sorry that's an addiction of mine" she joked.

...

"So, how old are you?" She asked sweetly, '17 I think' I told her, "huh you're younger than I thought, sorry I thought you were a college student when you came in" she apologized.

'That's a first, most people think I'm a middle schooler' I joked slightly, "really? Huh, I think I can see why height wise but you carry yourself as someone who has lived a long life of hardships which I generally don't see in a lot of younger people, thankfully" she admitted.

...

"Got any favorite classes? Or are you the type whose favorite class is lunch...I may or may not have been like that" she teased laughing a little, 'how do you know sign language?' I countered with a question of my own.

"Oh? I actually am fluent in multiple languages, I learned sign language due to wanting to communicate with others better" she explained barely fazed by my sudden question.

"Many friends or acquaintances of mine have selective mutism or are deaf and I don't want them to feel excluded, if you don't mind me asking how did you learn?" She asked, it wasn't pushy but just plain curiosity.

'My friend Chiasa was deaf' I told her without thinking, my hands quickly retreating as the words escaped me.

"Oh? Well that's nice of you to learn for her, I'm sure she appreciated it" she told me, "wow I've been hogging the spotlight huh? Got any questions for me?" She asked.

...
...
...

'How much are you getting paid for this?' I asked, 'because I can just lie and say you helped if you want that' I told her.

"I can't tell you how much I get payed due to your friends wishes, and I won't take your offer. That would break my code of honor" she told me.

It was worth a shot.

'Why did you become a therapist?' I asked. She didn't respond for a while, and the room became eerily silent minus a small fan running somewhere.

"I became a therapist to help people" she finally said. I nearly rolled my eyes from the predictable answer.

"When I was around your age, I had three friends and we were the schools delinquents to say the least, however one day we hotwired a car to go to the nearby beach...things went horribly wrong and we ended up getting into a severe accident..." she started.

My eyes widened.

"I survived, but my friends didn't..." she mumbled, she then paused before hesitantly asking, "can I hold your hand for a moment? Sorry sometimes showing is easier than telling you know?" She asked.

I extended my hand hesitantly.

I touched cold plastic like material.

What?

"As you can probably tell, that's a prosthetic, I lost my hand in the crash along with the skin on half of my face due to me getting stuck to the melted dashboard, while I survived I was in others words permanently scarred beyond repair and well ugly, I got into a depression following the accident due to survivors guilt and ended up dropping out of school for a while stowing away in my own uselessness and loss.

"But...eventually enough was enough, so friends of mine dragged me to meetings like these for other burn victims and support groups, and that's what made me want to eventually get my degree, so I could help others like they helped me. I renrolled in high school, made it through college and here I am today" she finished.

"Sorry, I guess that was a long story" she said. 'It's fine...'I said.

"You've probably been through worse, but I can tell you're strong...you're a fighter" she congratulated almost.

'I'm not strong, because I kept trying to die' I told her out of the blue, 'I wanted to see them again, so I tried to die' I said ignoring the small tears.