Saihara's POV:

The sun was bathed in a deep amber. The amber moon shined through the sky, the sky which had been beautifully dyed in rich magenta color, the sky in its endless boundaries had been filled with such a radiant light and rich color that slowly faded to a soft lilac color. Facing that golden sunlight which was beginning to disappear in the surrounding mountainscape was him. He was sitting on a large rock on the cliff-face, his legs dangled off and the trees rustled with the slight breeze. His hair moved with it, almost ethereal. 

He turned to face me, his dark violet eyes staring into my soul yet seeing nothing of the landscape surrounding him.

"O...Ouma..." I mumbled, the shock was still overwhelming me as I took another hesitant step forward as delight filled me yet a nagging feeling kept holding me back. It pleaded with me to truly access the situation I was in, it reminded me that coincidences just didn't exist but I wanted this to be true. I wanted it to be just the pivotal moment that finally everything I had worked for, everything that I had been building towards and hoping and begging every last star in the sky for had finally come true.

But Ouma didn't respond to my voice, he carried a neutral expression as he continued to look forward, it made me wonder if I was too quiet for him to hear me, but judging on that knowing look in his eyes I knew he did. He had heard me loud of clear...and as I slowed down it hit me. He knew I was excited to see him, but he wasn't excited to see me. It finally dawned on me, that while I had been longing for years just to see him again, I had no idea where or what he had been through for all these years. I didn't know what he thought of me if he had forgiven me for what had happened the day I left him behind, and even more, if he felt abandoned because in the end...I didn't find him. 

He had found me.

"Who's there?" a tired and bored voice asked, as he did the unimaginable. He got up from the rock, his hands still tracing the surface of the boulder as he readjusted where he was sitting. He crossed his legs, he was wearing a pair of tight black pants with a slight gray checkered pattern on them. He was wearing a dual-colored black and white sweatshirt, the colors being divided down vertically. The black side, or the right, had the details of dragon scales and the white side was left with similarity to koi fish. His shoes were black platforms, and his hair had grown much longer over the years, it hung down framing his face in loose stands, with most being pulled back in a messy side braid that I suspected he did himself. He had a lollipop in his mouth, as childish as that was as he took it out, I noticed the unnatural complexion he already had the last time I saw him, had only grown. Now his veins seemed to be the only pop of color on his body and his whole frame seemed incredibly weak and malnourished the guilt crushing me as his sullen eyes continued to stare at me waiting for an answer.

"Well? Who did Tokyo's finest send to find me here?" he repeated a slight taste of annoyance in his voice. His voice, a voice I only heard in rare cases didn't have the same raspiness and pain it held before, now it was cold and desolate. The voice had more power behind it, but it still felt like it was being forced despite the natural tone it had, and it unnerved me. I paused, his wording rang all the alarm bells inside my head and fed the paranoia and concerns even more that whoever I was looking at wasn't the same Ouma from two years ago but an entirely new person, one who might not be as innocent in this string of lies and corruption he had been previously. But stubbornly, I chose to believe. I chose to believe in Ouma.

"Shuichi. Shuichi Saihara" I answered him with full honesty and vulnerability, I chose to let him hear the relief in my voice, the relief of seeing him alive, but also the concern and fear for the situation that we had somehow found ourselves in. It was always like that though, our encounters were built not on the simplicity of life interactions, but brief peaks of raw emotional vulnerability or chance encounters. We had drawn each other into our worlds, but just as easily found each other out of orbit, and by the time I tried to reach a hand out he was gone from our solar system.

Ouma paused, as a soft chuckle escaped him. The laugh was hopeless and mournful as he continued to look forward at me with eyes full of anguish and pity as his lips curled into a small desperate smile. "It's been a while...hasn't it?" he asked, "didn't even recognize your voice Shyhara, did puberty decide to hit you now?" he teased. He then shifted his body again, sitting on the boulder but straightening his posture, the smile disappeared, and instead was replaced with a bored and tired expression that looked at me uninterested. "So why are you here?" he questioned in an aggravated tone.

"Who cares why I'm here-why are you here Ouma? You were missing for two years, I never stopped looking for you but somehow now you're right here-and your leg! You can move your leg...what happened? Why...why are you here? Please...please tell me it's not what I'm thinking...please tell me that things haven't changed this much" I begged, tears clouding my vision as I quickly brushed them away. Ouma for a second had a brief look of regret, before he closed his eyes, shaking his head as he mumbled something to himself in a clear attempt to regain both his composure and his control over the scenario. "Why are you here?" he repeated, his eyes still closed as he lowered his head and gripped tightly onto the sides of the rock, and I could see the sharp edges cutting into his palms.

"I...I'm here to stop whatever plan Asahi had in tow for the town, to see what he had planned. I was meant to save...Ouma, Ouma don't tell me you're involved with this. Are you being blackmailed? Or is there something that he has a hold on you still? He was the one who took you right? Who kidnapped you? Ouma you don't have to be afraid anymore...Ouma you're safe now. Just take my hand, and we'll go home. We'll get away from this place, and you can be safe and...and do whatever you want to do with your life" I offered him as I outstretched my hand. 

Ouma didn't move at first, taking in my words before he finally raised his head back to me and I finally saw what truly lied in his eyes. Laced in his eyes was searing malice in them, with fires of mania as he gave me a cruel and twisted smile.

"Well...since you insisted" Ouma taunted, as he dug his hand into his pocket and pulled out a large remote. The remote had one single button on it, and a large antenna, it was bulky in size and Ouma held it as if it was the most precious thing in the world and despite likely still being blind he looked at it fondly. "I'm here to do exactly that Saihara, and you already know why I'm here. You've known the entire time why I'm here, and I'm sorry" he apologized, though it sounded incredibly disingenuous. 

He said it so bluntly, and that made it sting further. There was no room for doubt anymore, he cut me off from creating lingering fantasies and my hopes that this wasn't true. That what Ouma held wasn't a device created for the sole purpose of destruction, that he wasn't holding it with such delight in his eyes, and that he would take my hand.

And all I could do was hold back the urge to scream. Scream at the world that had created this scene, scream at his father for corrupting my friend in ways I couldn't begin to imagine, scream at my father for taking me away from Ouma in the first place and allowing this to happen, and most of all myself. At myself for always being such an incompetent and useless detective and the worst most despicable friend I could've been. 

"You don't have to do this" I attempted in vain, "you don't have to hurt anyone anymore Ouma. You don't have to be scared or afraid, we can talk about this. We can talk this out, we can do something different or solve whatever is wrong in another way. But please...please just set the remote down" I spoke carefully trying not to set Ouma further on edge. I eyed the remote and fear grew in my body as I glanced down at the coast in the distance and the small fishing town and the horror truly set in.

This was the town that Ouma had grown up in, it was the town Chiasa had grown up in. He had met DICE here, he lived his entire life here and countless unshared stories starred in this town. This town had also contained the demons and monsters that tormented him, the creeping and anguished memories of a childhood I had to cross-examine time and time again, a town that chose to believe a lie and acted as the executioner for crimes long in the past, and long paid for.  And if I allowed Ouma to continue, it would also be the same town that he would tear apart with his own hands. 

"I don't have to..." Ouma mumbled to himself before laughing. His laughter was soft and barely audible at first before developing into full-on hysterical and maniacal laughter that rang across the mountainscape in echoes as he looked at my eyes full of pure glee, "you're right, I don't have to...I don't have to do anything anymore" he agreed which set me on edge. "I don't have to care anymore! About you! About that fucking hellscape! DICE! NOTHING! Ahh, I don't know why I wasted so much time caring! Because all I ever did was suffer, and cry and scream and nothing happened! Nothing was ever done, no one was there when I was abused or hurt or starved in that old hag's house, no one cared when my own mother abused me. So why should I care about those same bastards now? WHY should I have to care what happens to them, when they never cared about what happened to me?" he demanded to know, his clear resentment and anger boiling over.

I stood there dumbfounded, this rage...this rage and resentment must've existed even back then. This couldn't have just been spurred on, but it had been allowed to fester and grow and eventually consume what was left of Ouma's fragmented mind. The mind of someone who was pushed too far, and someone who had been shown the worst of humanity and brief instances of the good it had to offer.

"See? You can't even argue with me...those bastards deserve it...so I'm going to bring us all to hell. I'm going to finally be free from everything, nothing has to matter anymore...nothing has to hurt anymore...and nothing will have to haunt me anymore. I'm going to be free, I'm going to finally be happy for once in my god damn life" Ouma told me with an exasperated voice, he tilted his head up at the cloudless sky, and took a deep breath as his shoulders began to relax. "I'm going to do it...and you can't stop me" he promised as he lingered over the button again and adrenaline quickly rushed through me.

"What do you do now" I started, Ouma looked at me confused raising his eyebrows confused his mouth slightly agape. "That was your question, that was the question you asked me the day I left you. The question I never answered, what are you supposed to do now" I explained. Ouma paused, and to my relief, he slightly adjusted his fingers position, now lingering away from the button through his grip remained firm. "And to be honest, even back then...I don't think I had an answer for you" I confessed with a heavy heart. Ouma's eyes widened first with shock and then rage as he gritted his teeth in anger, his veins seemed to pop off his skin as he tried to hold himself back.

"Every time I remember what happened, I always have a different answer. Something new I wish I could've told you, and I keep trying to perfect the words I would've told you, I wanted to give you empty promises and hopes I knew would've been lost to you at the time. Sometimes I wanted to give you advice that didn't even apply to those days, I want to tell you the things I have learned since that day, sometimes I want to bare my full soul to you in hopes that maybe you could hear some kindred spirit in me. That maybe you can see that I do know, at least part of what you were feeling.

"But then I realized, I realize now as I look at you...I know nothing.

"I don't know what it's like to have lost so much like you, I don't know what it's like to be hurt and abandoned like you have been time and time again. So no words I ever say could've truly solved your problems. Ouma I have no answer for you, I can't tell you what you should do with your life.

"I can't tell you why you lived that day, what made the death spare you that day from its grip. But what I can tell you, is the same thing that applies to everyone. Ouma your life is your own, it's your responsibility to care for it. Not mine, not your father, and not the world. What you choose to do with your life is your choice alone to make, only you have the freedom to create your own destiny and accept whatever may come from that path and all the obstacles life will never stop throwing your way.

"All I can tell you, all I ever can promise to you, is that I want to be there by your side. I want to walk with you towards the future you decide, I want to support you and be someone to fall back on or be the shoulder to cry on when you need it. But I can't choose your future, I can offer you my condolences, I can give my own flawed advice and try and keep what hope you had inside you alive. But I can't ever control your life, and I can't take away your pain and suffering. I can just promise to be there, but this Ouma, is this what you want? 

"Is this what you believe will help you? Is this what you think will finally bring you peace? Please...please just think of what you are doing, consider who you are hurting as well. Because for as many people that hurt you, some were innocent. Maybe they didn't see you in your time of need, maybe they didn't help you. But some weren't even alive when DICE died, there are children down there and innocent bystanders who didn't even know your name. So if you think you do need to destroy everything, burn it all down to quell the anger in your heart...know that I can't support that. And I will do what I have to do to protect the people down there, both the bad and the good" I vowed, my voice was calm yet I felt my hope die with my closing remarks. Ouma was frozen in shock as he seemed to process, his forehead scrunching up with stress before hissing and finally looked at me furiously.

"That's it?" he asked in an accusatory manner. "THAT'S IT? NO! That can't be your answer, that wasn't even an answer! What? What do you want from me? There can't be it! You can't...you can't just leave me like this...you can't just leave me holding out for nothing..." Ouma begged with hysteric breaths as his eyes looked scared, he was gripping his hair tightly pulling it out in strands and it scared me, but I held myself back from running over to him in fear of him in fear pressing that button. Instead, I took slow and small steps toward him, waiting for any sign from Ouma to move further from me. But he didn't, he didn't show any apprehension so I settled in a new spot now just barely a few steps from him as he held his head in his hands, the remote still in his hand but the grip had loosened and his breaths came out slow and methodical as he whispered to himself in an attempt at self-comfort.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry Ouma" I apologized, Ouma instead just glanced at me, his eyes were red and puffy as he sniffled. "I'm sorry I was a bad friend, but...I am here now. If you still need someone...I'm here, it's your choice..." I offered again as I hesitantly reached for Ouma. Ouma rested his hands back to the boulder, he seemed unconsciously trying to reach for me, but before I could do anything...Ouma turned to me with a sad smile and a tear-soaked face.

"I'm sorry too," he said in a sad tone.

 My eyes widened in shock as I quickly shot up and hurled towards him as Ouma reached for the button. Quickly I grabbed his wrist and in pain, Ouma let go of the remote. The two of us fell to the forest ground, I hissed in pain as my side got cut against the sharp-edged boulder a small throbbing pain beginning as Ouma began frantically feeling the ground trying to find the remote as I noticed it lying a few feet ahead quickly crawling towards it, as my legs touched the dry leaves they broke in a loudly and Ouma quickly turned to the sound and lunged trying to scramble and find it as I grabbed the remote and quickly tried getting up to run away from him. Ouma in desperation grabbed onto my leg and pulled me back as I screamed falling back to the floor as I crawled in on my body and tried to keep the remote covered as Ouma began hitting and kicking and screaming at me to let the remote go but I wouldn't budge as I realized that I was on the stone.

I glanced at the remote and realized what was left to do, as I made sure and quickly on the backside repeatedly began smashing the remote as the flimsy metal covering became exposed, "NO!" Ouma screamed in heavy sobs but finally, in a loud crunch the remote laid broken and I panted out in small breaths sweat dripping down my brow. Ouma feebly kept punching me, but he lacked the same energy as before...before he also slowly fell to his knees and collapsed. His eyes dulled over as small tears fell from his face, as I glanced at him.

"You..." I began as I hissed a sharp pain in my abdomen as I glanced down at my shaking hands covered in thick red blood. Blood, blood that had stained my shirt was now spreading as my vision became blurry as I fell to the side my energy leaving me as I kept trying to ignore the growing need to sleep. Ouma was frozen as I tried to reach for him...

Light danced in tiny orbs in front of me, as I kept trying to raise my hand....I felt some shifting making me groan in pain as I glanced up, Ouma still had the distant look in his eyes as I realized I had been shifted onto his lap, his sweatshirt had been removed and I glanced down at my own shirt seeing a ripped part of the shirt was now a makeshift bandage as Ouma pressed down on the wound.

"Oum...Ouma..." I mumbled as Ouma glanced over in the distance. A slow siren began in the distance as Ouma glanced back at me with a neutral expression as he glanced down at the shattered remains of the remote. "My father...is he alive...?" Ouma finally asked in a small and meek voice. I tried to answer but I found myself struggling even to move my fingers, Ouma studied my expression with desperate eyes before closing them and a small tear escaped him as he breathed calmly. He knew...he knew...

"SHUICHI!" my father's voice cried out in the distance, Ouma glanced in that direction before looking back down towards me as he gave me a sad smile as he stepped away from me and held his hands up towards the approaching officer as I tried to stop him but I couldn't even speak anymore. "O...Ou..." I tried to call out as I felt tears escaping me as blurred images of police officers and Ouma being arrested as he kept his eyes in my direction before finally turning away from me without another word and disappeared in the distance.

"Shuichi..." my father said in a quiet voice as I found some EMT workers approaching and working on me. That's when I truly began crying. Crying for my failure to stop Ouma, even if I prevented the destruction I couldn't stop him from attempting it in the first place...

"You did enough, you did more than enough," my father said in a comforting voice. As the world began fading away as the ambulance seemed to move my father held my hand, "you...you tried. I know you tried so hard...but it's not your fault" my father promised me as I couldn't even keep my eyes open anymore.

"You're not at fault if he didn't take your hand" He assured in vain.

But he was wrong.
Wrong because I didn't reach out my hand.
He was wrong because even though the Ouma I knew was still in there, the kind soul who fought to keep me alive till the paramedics arrived- I couldn't stop what drove him to want to set an entire town ablaze.
Wrong because I never did enough, because I allowed work and ambition to blind me.
Wrong because I was scared to admit I never knew what I was doing back then, and the one who put faith in me now was dead, and the one to suffer the consequences was now in handcuffs.

I'm chose to be the detective.
I chose to forget.