I always wondered what it would be like to have someone like you so much they would do anything for you.

No matter what the circumstance was they would drop everything to come be with you.

I never knew that existed until I met minghao.

"Oh come on! Just one date!" Minghao begs for the hundredth time.

I had only been back home in Ilsan for a month now and I had already gotten an admirer.

Minghao was going to be a senior in high school and it amazed me how much this reminded me of Jin and I.

Only difference was I had somehow become Jin.

Well, minus liking the minor.

The roles were switched.

"You do realize I'm older than you right?" I  ask.

"Only by one year!" He cries.

Still, I was eighteen and he was seventeen.

It was only one year yet, he was still a minor.

"That one year makes a big difference in this case." I point out.

"Please y/n! It's only one date. We don't have to do anything but talk." He says.

Minghao was sweet, really He was, but there was only one man on my mind right now and that was Jin.

I was still confused about the kiss and somehow it changed everything.

My feelings were all jumbled and I was even more conflicted.

I liked the kiss.

I liked it a lot.

That being said, I had no idea what was going to happen when I got home.

Anyway, Jin still has a girlfriend so it seemed there wasn't anything I could do.

Although Jin made me promise to go to him once I started having feelings for him, I couldn't go back.

Not now anyway.

"Okay, fine. Just one date."
•••
Finally, that night came.

Minghao wants things to be special and it was obvious he was a hopeless romantic.

It was cute.

When I think about it now, I wondered if this was how I had looked in Jin's eyes.

"I hope you like it." Minghao says nervously as he shows me to a picnic.

He had laid a bunch of fairy lights around the towel on the grass and you could tell he had put a lot of thought into this.

"It's sweet. Thank you Minghao." I smile as we sit down on the towel.

"I was afraid you would think it was too cliche." He says.

"Cliche can be good." I smile.

Minghao seems to relax at my words.

"So, you live in Seoul now?" He asks.

"I do." I confirm.

"Do you have someone special back there? Is that why you didn't want to go out with me?" He asks.

"It's not necessarily that.." I say.

"It's okay, you don't have to tell me." He says as he looks away from me.

"His name is Jin." I say.

Minghao turns to me and pulls his lips in.

"Are you two dating?" He asks.

"He has a girlfriend."

"So it's one sided then?" He asks, now curious.

"It's complicated." I shrug.

"How so?" Minghao asks.

"It's a long story."

"We have lots of time." He says.

I guess it couldn't hurt to talk about it.

So I tell him everything.

Everything since the very first moment I had met Jin.

Once I finish telling him he looks at me like I'm crazy.

"So what happens now. Between you guys I mean." He says.

"I'm not sure. He's with Fei so I don't know where we stand. He doesn't even know that I'm starting to have feelings for him. It's stupid to even feel something after everything I put him through." I sigh.

"I don't think it's stupid. I mean, I guess it was meant to be if you guys keep finding your way back to each other." Minghao says.

"You really are a romantic. You know that right?" I smile.

"Yeah, I know." He laughs.

The rest of that night we talk about Jin and about everything else.

At this point I'm sure he knew there wasn't going to be anything between us.

Sure, I liked Minghao, but not in that way.

If there was anything I was sure of, it was that I liked Jin.

Or at least I think I do.
•••
"I'm gonna miss you!" My friends say as they hug me tightly.

"I'll come visit another time. I'll miss you guys too." I say as I hug them too.

Today was the day I was finally heading home and as sad as I was to leave, I was excited to see the guys.

It had been too long.

"Bye!"

My friends wave as I get into my car.

It would be a decently long ride back so as soon as I get home I'd crash.

The whole ride home I listened to music and jammed out.

I was surprisingly hype considering I was tired from this drive.

Finally, I made it back home.

Without even grabbing my bags from my car I head inside and fall face first onto my bed.

It felt great to be home.

I didn't even bother texting anyone.

Instead, I passed out.

[...]