Episode One, Part 1:
The Invaders 

Please, just give me something for the pain 'cause my heart 
softens to your name. And when you're gone, I come 
undone. I need someone to wake me up. 

Sol clutched onto the radio in her hands, pressing it under the base of her chin as she held it close, listening to Dreea and Chessca's voice fill the small room of the Bunker's office. It had been six months since she had seen them last; since she had seen any of them in the second bunker, and although their evening radio calls were rooted deep into their routine, there were still moments that felt like she was trying to comprehend being away from them for so long...

It was one thing to be away from Dreea; she had done it before, despite it being the result of her memories being erased, and she knew that Dreea could protect herself just fine and survive anything that was thrown her way - not that there had been any enemies to face with all of her people safe in the bunker. But being away from Chessca was an entirely different fear of hers altogether. Even now, months after leaving The City of Targo behind, Sol still felt the urge to make sure every door was locked behind her or to call out for Chess when she went to bed to make sure she was safe in her own bed, just around the corner from hers... Sol couldn't do any of that from where she was, and though she knew Dreea loved Chessca and would guard her with her life, it still left a gaping hole in her chest to know she couldn't be there, and the anxiety slowly crawled it's way back into her heart each night.

"I can't wait to see you again, Riv," Chessca murmured into the radio. Her voice was soft and coated in sleep and Sol knew that their conversation would have to come to an end soon. "Dreea said something about us trying to leave the bunkers? Is that what Atlantis reckons?"

Sol sighed, recalling the conversation she and her sister had, had with Dreea. "Atlantis is trying to figure out a way to test if the water levels are decreasing on the ground," she told her. "She's getting a little worried about us all being underground 2 months longer than her and Bas predicted because of food and water supplies. We're fine here because our Bunker is so empty, but there's over a hundred people in yours..."

"Yeah," Chessca chuckled. "I have noticed that our rations have been decreasing, and it hasn't been a subtle change, either."

"I'm sorry," Sol apologised, unable to recognise that it wasn't her fault. "I wish I could be there with you... Hopefully it won't be too much longer."

"It's not your fault, Riv," Chessca assured her. "And you're right. It won't be long until we're together again."

They were miles away from each other, but Sol could still feel her smiling down the line. "I love you. We'll talk tomorrow."

"Love you, too," Chessca repeated back, shortly afterwards cutting off the radio and returning to her life away from Sol.

Too afraid to be left with her own, hollowing thoughts, Sol picked herself up and trudged out of the office, retreating to the living room of the Bunker where the others were all waiting. Liam was snuggled up close to Fenn; Quill was flopped over one of the armchairs with his legs dangling over the edge; Atlantis was already in bed for the night; and Wynn was hogging one of the larger couches, seemingly waiting for her and watching as she entered the room, a smile plastered across his face.

Sol smiled back in exhaustion, gratefully falling into Wynn's open arms, almost ready to fall asleep right then.

"Everything okay?" Wynn murmured, tucking her hair behind her ear as he looked down at her, and she looked up.

"Yeah, just talking to Chess," she told him. "She has hope that we're gonna get out of here soon, but I don't know... It's hard to hold onto something that feels so far away."

"Trust me, I know," Wynn assured her. "But you heard what your sister said earlier today. Even if the water hasn't all gone away completely, the ground is probably survivable again, and we can set up camp on higher ground until Basilisk is safe and we can rebuild everything there."

"Speaking of sisters," Sol uttered, sitting up against him as her eyes focused on Elara. She nodded in her direction so Wynn could understand what she was talking about, the both of them watching as Elara shook away the misery on her face, trying to muster up the most convincing smile as she quietly entered into the children's room - which had originally been Bas and Harlow's room - to make sure everyone was settled for the night.

"I'm worried about yours..." Sol continued, not wanting to make Wynn too upset, but needing to know if could see in Elara what she did.

"Yeah, me too," Wynn alleviated her fears. "Quill and I were talking last night; she's still struggling."

"If Atlantis is right about getting to the ground soon, maybe that will help," Sol suggested. "And with her taking up the responsibility for all these little ones running around, it keeps her busy; it's good for her. It means she's forced to take care of herself because she has to take care of them."

"I know," Wynn sighed. "Especially Izzy... It kind of feels like those two saved each other. I just wish it was under different circumstances. I wish they got to be here as well."

"Well, even after we lose the people we love, we just have to-"

"We just have to keep on living," Wynn smiled, finishing off her phrase for her. He knew it was something she had been telling herself for a while now, and truthfully, he was glad she was there to say it so often. Life didn't slow down for anybody, it just kept moving on, and that was exactly what they had to try and do each day.

////////

Elara was relieved to hear the older kids all laughing along with each other and getting themselves into bed for the evening. She was glad that they were all of an age where they able to take care of themselves for most things, and it just left Harlow and Izzy as the two youngest of the children - both of whom still depended on her for a lot of things.

Izzy was sitting cross-legged on her bed, beaming at Elara with tired eyes as she made her way inside. Elara couldn't help but laugh, collapsing onto the bed beside her as she made a point of expressing how exhausted she was.

"You can't go to sleep yet!" Izzy exclaimed. "You still have to tell me one of your stories."

"Why don't you tell me a story for once?" Elara teased. "That sounds like a good plan: I'll get under the covers whilst you braid my hair and tell me a story. Yep! I like that!"

Izzy folded her arms, trying to shoot Elara a disapproving look, but there was an evident smile taking over her features. Elara prodded her fingers into her sides, earning a squeal of delight out of her as Izzy laughed at her tickling, scooting forward on the bed so Elara could sit behind her.

"Who do you want the story to be about tonight?" Elara asked, already gathering the young girl's hair into her hands as she started to braid it. "The Nobel Sovereign Riverly? Uncle Wynn? Doctor Fenn-"

"The Great Sovereign Kodiak!" Izzy was defiant, wiggling slightly in excitement.

Elara was glad that Izzy couldn't see her with her back facing her, unable to keep the smile on her face any longer. She refocused her hands on the braids, trying to recover from where she had dropped a few strands of her hair.

"I always tell you stories about him," Elara shook her head slightly, hating how soft her voice had turned. "You've chosen him for the last four nights. Actually, I have a great story about Uncle Ares that I could-"

"I want Kodiak," Izzy insisted, her voice giving away how reluctant she was to be told no.

"Me too... I-I mean okay. I'll tell you one," Elara shook her head, praying that Izzy wouldn't dig deeper into what she said.

Not having to look too far into her own heart, Elara recalled one of the many memories of Kodiak she had lingering on the surface, doubting if she had the courage to tell it to Izzy as well as she had done the previous nights. Talking about him - having to reference him as just a memory now - destroyed Elara a little more each time.

"Once upon a time, when the ground was swarmed with enemy clans and NightRaiders in every direction, I found myself lost in the forest after the sun had gone down. It was dark everywhere; pitch black - and I couldn't even see my hand as I waved it in front of my face. The only thing I could think of doing was digging through my bag to see what I could find," Elara said, emphasising some of the words and changing her pitch to draw Izzy in. "I could feel my torch as I pulled it out of my bag, but as I tried to turn it on, I realised it was broken. What am I gonna do? I panicked. For all I knew, the enemy already had their eyes on me and were just waiting to strike... Realising that it might have been my last resort, I reached into my bag and felt around for my radio, thankful that my fingers had memorised how to call Kodiak without me even needing to look."

Elara smiled for a moment, too lost in her own story to realise that it wasn't really anymore. Sometimes, she felt as if this time was more meaningful for her than it ever could be for Izzy.

"When Sovereign Kodiak realised that I was lost in the dark, he began asking me a series of questions so he could figure out where I was. What was the last thing you remember seeing? He asked me. Did you pass the dams yet, or are you still on the other side of the river? ...I told him that I didn't remember anything that I had already passed: I hadn't expected to get lost out there, or for my torch to die on me. And although everything was screaming at me that I should be feeling scared out of my mind out there, alone, I couldn't help but feel a little braver when I heard his voice ringing back through the radio. Stay where you are. I'm coming to find you. He said. And whatever you do, don't make a sound-"

"Sovereign Kodiak is always the hero," Izzy interrupted. "He's been the hero in the story for the last four nights and every other one that I can think of... Can you tell me a story - still about you and him - but where you're the hero? Where you're the one who saves him?"

"No, I can't Izzy," Elara's reply was quick and blunt, and her fragile emotions felt out of control. She tightened the elastic around the end of the young girl's hair, not bothering to continue the braid right until the end.

"There isn't a story that goes like that," she said. "I don't save him in the end... I can't, no matter how badly I wanted to."

"Half the fun to telling a story is making it all up," Izzy said, suddenly unsettled as she realised Elara was standing up from the bed and pulling the blankets over her - a part of their evening routine which usually came a little later on. "Can't you do that now? Just change the story a little? Give yourself a happy ending?"

"Most of these stories aren't made up, Izzy," Elara reminded her, unable to look her in the eyes as she searched for every distraction possible to be able to leave the room.

"You know that," she continued. "You know what happened to Kodiak."

"...He died," Izzy mumbled, not sure if she was supposed to answer.

"Yes. He died," Elara confirmed. "He's dead... Maybe you've heard enough stories about him-"

"Ell, no!" Izzy whined, not ready to part from her favourite character from the older girl's tales.

"Sometimes you run out of stories!" Elara snapped a little, desperate for Izzy to stop pestering her. Elara peeled her eyes open after her momentary outburst, realising that perhaps things had gotten a little out of control.

"I'm sorry, Iz," Elara sighed, moving around to sit on the edge of the bed right beside her. "But it's not like I have a whole lifetime of stories to tell about him. He didn't get any more time, even though he should have. I can't tell you about all the brave, heroic things he would have done if he was here, because he's not."

"Maybe... Maybe you can just tell me about him," Izzy said. "It doesn't even have to be a story."

"I don't think I want to talk about him," Elara admitted, hating that she had already let Izzy seen her become so vulnerable. "It's not fair on you when I get upset like this, and it's kind of like I keep digging up his grave... The best thing is to try and move on, like River always says: we have to keep on living. No matter how bad it hurts, we just have to."

"Elara-"

"I'm sorry, but I'm tired, Izzy. I'm going to head to bed. I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

Izzy huffed a little, but she fell back against the pillow, already bringing the blanket up to cover her shoulders.

"Okay. I'm sorry, as well. I love you."

"I know," Elara smiled, already opening the door, glad to hear that the rest of the children in the next room had all settled down. "I love you, too, sweet girl."

Once Elara knew Izzy was safe and sound for the night, she pulled the door shut behind her, leaning on its frame for a moment as she let out a deep, shaky breath that she had been holding for too long. She moved one of her hands up to wipe under her eye, frustrated to see that she didn't last long before the tears started falling, and hurried down the hallway to where her room was.

She immediately sat down on the edge of her bed, not evening having the energy to crawl straight under the covers. A part of her wanted to join the others in the living room so that she wouldn't be left alone to her own thoughts, but she didn't know if she would be able to conceal the evidence of her crying, let alone keep up her facade if someone asked her if she was okay.

Before she could make up her mind about what she wanted to do, there was a gentle knock on the door and Elara called out, half-expecting Izzy to poke her head inside. Instead, Wynn was standing there, quietly pushing the door open as he and Quill hovered in the doorway.

"What are you guys doing here?" Elara asked.

"We came to see if you're okay," Quill answered, his face drowned over in sympathy.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine."

Wynn let out a heavy breath, glancing over at Quill with a look that Elara knew meant they didn't believe her. She sighed, already knowing what was coming next as they both walked further into the room, sitting themselves down so they could talk.

"You seem really upset lately," Wynn pointed out. "And we're getting a bit worried. We just want to make sure you're doing alright because Izzy and the others look up to you, and that can be a lot of pressure when you're holding back your own emotions. Trust me," he said. "I know what's that like. After Ares died, I felt like I couldn't prioritise any of my own feelings because I had to take care of you and Quill, but that didn't help you guys at all. If you're struggling, it's okay. There's plenty of us here that can help you."

Elara couldn't express how grateful she was to always have her brothers in her corner, but every time one of them said something, she felt as if she was still waiting for two others voices to reach out to her and tell her that everything would be okay.

"What's wrong, Ell?" Quill asked, his empathy consuming him.

"...Izzy keeps insisting for stories about Kodiak," Elara admitted, dropping her head low. "And she asked-" She choked on her words, not sure if she was brave enough to keep going.

"She asked what?" Wynn searched, pulling his seat closer to the edge of the bed where Elara was sitting.

"She asked if I could tell a story where I saved him in the end... I wasn't expecting it, that's all. It caught me off guard."

"I'm sorry," Wynn told her, not knowing how he could be of any help. "One of us could talk to her for you if-"

"No, it's okay," Elara cut him off. "I already told her I don't want to talk about him anymore. I don't think she'll ask again."

Elara expected them to be relieved that she had resolved the issue on her now, but both of her brothers were silent, glancing at each other again with worried looked.

"What?" Elara rolled her eyes, not understanding what they were so concerned about. She was dealing with things. She was figuring out how to cope; isn't that what they wanted?

"It just..." Quill hesitated, trying to find the kindest way to say it. "It sounds like you're trying to shut him out; like you don't want to think about him anymore; you don't want to remember him. It's great if you feel like you're starting to get better, but you don't have to leave him behind. You can allow yourself to miss him, Ell. You can allow yourself to hurt; you loved him."

"I can't," Elara shook her head, becoming frustrated with them. "And you shouldn't be telling me that. If I let it in, then I won't be able to feel anything else. Then I won't be able to be there for Izzy-"

"You don't have to do this on your own, Elara," Wynn interrupted. "Izzy's our family, too. We're here to help if you need to fall apart sometimes. It's okay to fall apart after losing Kodi-"

"Enough!" Elara yelled, hating whenever anyone recalled what happened to him, despite her bitterly reminding Izzy about it minutes ago. It still made her so angry; it still didn't feel real.

"I said don't want to talk about it," she huffed, speaking through gritted teeth. "I'm fine. I'm not going to fall apart. Can you please just leave so I can get some sleep?"

Wynn frowned sorely, hating to think that he had made things worse.

"Just because we're safe down here doesn't mean that I'm not always going to look out for you," Wynn said. "Both of you," he added, looking to Quill as well. "It's my job to make sure you're okay. You can hate me all you want for that at times, but I'm still going to be here."

Wynn trailed to the door, encouraging Quill to follow after him, thinking they weren't going to get another word out of their sister for the rest of the night. But she caught him by surprise, mumbling just loud enough for him to hear.

"I know," she said. "Thank you."

As Elara perched herself back on her bed, dropping her head in her hands, she noticed someone else appear in the doorway. She glanced up to see Sol standing there, presumably having heard her as she exploded at her brothers, waiting to be invited in.

"Mind if I take a seat?" The Sovereign asked.

Elara shrugged. "Only if you're prepared for me to bite your head off. Apparently I have no control over myself today."

Sol laughed, making herself comfortable as she sat on the bed beside Elara, folding her legs underneath her. Her eyes glanced around the room, admiring all the decorations that had been put up over the years, grateful that her months in the Bunker had finally given her some understanding to what their life had been like before.

"This is nice," Sol said, picking up a framed photograph that had been sitting on her nightstand. Her eyes glimmered over the photo of Elara, Ares and Fabian, feeling relieved for her that no matter how many years had past, she would still be able to recall their faces.

"I have one photo," she said. "It's of my sister and I before she went into her bunker. Our dad was in the middle, but she ripped him out of it. It's in mine and Wynn's room if you want to see it sometime. It was one of the few things I managed to take with me from camp, and I'm glad I have it. It reminds me that I've always had a sister, no matter how badly I tried to shut her out after she came to the ground-"

"River," Elara sighed, almost knowing what she was up to.

"And you have your brothers. You have Ares, right here-"

"I don't want to talk about him."

"I wish I had a photo with Dreea or Chess," Sol continued, not paying any attention to what Elara was saying. "One with Kodiak..."

"Riverly," Elara pushed, biting back her tongue.

"He's the closest thing I ever had to a brother..." Sol said. "In fact, it doesn't even matter what I call it; he's been my family my entire life, no matter who's blood he had. Him and Dreea... And I really loved him. And I really wish I could have saved him. And I really miss him."

"I already told you, I don't-"

"Wynn is the only one who knows about this, but I cried over him the entire night last week. I didn't want anyone else to see me like that because I thought they wouldn't think I was as strong or put together as they all believe I am. And when I was speaking to Dreea on the radio yesterday, she was crying, too. I can probably count on both hands the amount of times I've known her to cry in our entire lives, and believe me, most of those times have been in these last few months, because of Kodiak."

"Is that true?" Elara asked, feeling her eyes covered over in warm tears.

"Yeah," Sol nodded, taking hold of the younger girl's hand. "Crying, falling apart, mourning someone, no matter how long it's been - that's not a sign of being weak. It's a sign of being human. It means that we were lucky enough to love someone so much; to have had someone so special."

"When you lost Noah," Elara began, being cautious as she said his name, not wanting to stir up bad memories. Despite having lost Kodiak herself, she was fortunate enough to not have had him die and bleed out in her arms. If she could imagine the cruellest way to lose someone, it might have been that. "How did you move on? How did you love someone again?"

"Well," Sol breathed, proud of herself for being able to talk about him and not only focus on his death. "It wasn't just as simple as that... I loved Wynn, too, even though I wouldn't admit it to myself at the time, and I think having him there, knowing that he still needed me; knowing that my people still needed me, is what forced me to keep going. I also had Jonas to take care of," Sol hummed, managing a delicate smile as she said his name, but she didn't break. "I had to look after him. I had to help him grow strong, train him, teach him how the world works, let him know that he had someone who loved him, because he did, even after losing his big brother. Having him as my responsibility; taking that first act of loving someone again meant that I was already on the pathway to healing, just like you love Izzy. That's going to heal you in the end."

"I just feel like it's taking so long for me to move on from this," Elara sighed defeatedly. "Like I won't ever move on."

"You will," Sol promised her. "Maybe not right away; maybe not even for a few years, but you will. The best way to do that is by remembering what Kodiak always wanted for you."

"And that is?" Elara asked, desperate to hear what she had to say.

"For you to realise that you could make it through anything... The visions, losing Ares, The City of Targo, almost losing Quill. You have to keep going. That's what he always told you. That's what he'd tell you now: that you can make it through this." 

One // Part One
There isn't a story that goes like that. I don't save him in the end.

And I really loved him. And I really wish I could have saved him. And I really miss him.

First chapter of Season 8! Honestly, it's crazy to think that we're on the EIGHT book of this series! I have high hopes for this book getting to 100K like the previous two (as the notes alone are 32,000 words) and this chapter was 4.1K words (the first chapter! Knocked it out of the park)!

I seriously can't wait for all the surprises this book has in store. And I can't wait for you to get to know Izzy better! She's one of three new characters this season and I reckon everyone will have a soft spot for her. On a side note, did you catch Wynn being called "Uncle Wynn" in reference to Izzy? Adorable! And then them calling her a part of their family? It makes my heart melt.

20/10/20