Episode Six, Part 3:
N e v e r   l o s e   Y o u   //
L o v e   I s   N o t   E n o u g h

I would rather see this world through the eyes of a child 
(please don't leave me here). 

Elara stirred on the bed, somewhere between being asleep, and awake: the kind of consciousness she wouldn't remember the next time she woke up. 

She tilted her head slowly, looking to the left where she could feel someone touching her arm; a strap tightened just above her elbow, a sharp pinch by her wrist and she could feel something hot burn its way through her body. 

Her eyes burst open, demanding to know who was there to her, and what they had just done to her. Beside her, Kane was hovering closely, relieved that she was alert. 

"Dad?" Elara muttered, needing a few moments before the memory of what ha happened came back to her. Her voice was raspy, no louder than a whisper, strained from all of the screaming she had forgotten about. 

"Elara!" Kane breathed out, cupping his daughter's face in relief. "Rhea will be here any minute. This next phase, it's... It's not going to be easy-" 

"No, dad..." Elara whined, fatigued, unable to fight against the restraints. 

"No, it's okay!" Kane was quick to reassure her. "This serum I've just given you; it's adrenaline. You'll need it for this." 

"No!" She pushed herself up, seeing the room spin consequently. "Why won't you listen? Please, get me out of here." Her words were slurred as the fog in her mind tried to consume everything; her body felt like it was floating and being pulled in every direction, all at once. 

"Fight or flight. That's Phase 3." Kane hurried to prepare her for what was about to happen, knowing her life depended on it. "Y-your heart shouldn't stop, but if it does-" 

"Shouldn't what!?" A siege of energy pounded in her chest, fighting its way through her body. 

"If it does, I'll be here. You'll have to try and focus on my voice. That's why I gave you the shot." 

Elara's lips trembled, and she opened her shaking hand for her dad to hold, squeezing tightly, her nails digging into his skin. 

"What are you doing to me? You're supposed to love me..." She whimpered, fighting hard to keep her vision locked on her dad, anger tainting her features. 

"It's because I love you that I have to do this. Lara, I promise you, if you knew what is waiting for you in the City of Targo, the people you belong to, you'd chose it in a heartbeat." 

Elara shook her head, unable to hold in the emotion streaming from her eyes. 

"You're just like mum..." She murmured. "The Ground's made a monster out of you." 

Kane pulled away, his face scrunching up, completely unaware of what she was talking about. "W-what?" He stuttered. 

"See! You haven't even asked about what happened to her. You just accepted her death, because you're only here for one thing. You don't even care what you're doing to Quill or Ares or Wynn because of it. As long as you get Targo's precious Queen, then it doesn't matter who you destroy, me included." She spat, turning her face away from him. 

She knew it wasn't enough. He had to know what their family endured before he returned, perhaps a last attempt at making him realize why she wanted to stay so badly. 

"Lyra killed mum. Actually, I think she was trying to kill Ares, but it still ended up being mum. Because they wanted us to go to Blood Riders with them so badly that they would hurt even their own family to succeed... Mum didn't die a hero, dad. And I won't either." 

Kane couldn't comprehend the words being said by his own daughter. He couldn't bring himself to face the death of Martha, nor believe that Elara could hate the very purpose she was born for - to not want to go with him. 

The door opened behind them, concluding their conversation. Kane stepped away from the bed, sliding the needle into his pocket so Rhea wouldn't find out the measures he had gone to, to ensure Elara survived Phase 3. 

"Elara. Do you feel rested?" Rhea asked, taking the position Kane had been in prior to her arrival. 

Elara glanced over at her dad, unable to wipe the hatred from her face, seeing him encouraging her to nod. 

She was hesitant to follow his instructions, but knew that her life was on the line. She looked back at Rhea, nodding. 

"Good." Rhea stepped aside, making room for her follows to approach Elara. 

They lowered the bed, tilting it downwards, connecting a drip to her veins so they could fill her body was various different drugs. 

"The stakes are higher each time we progress to the next phase, but if you're truly the Heir to the City of Targo, you'll find a way to survive. Make sure you fight. Hard." Rhea informed her sincerely. She was confused why Elara wasn't questioning them, pleading, pushing away all their attempts to touch her - but she told herself that she was just slowly coming around to the promise of her kingdom. 

Elara stared upwards at the ceiling, rotating on the bed. The burning in her veins had returned, and she could feel something taking over, like a wave that surfaced every inch on her body. 

She closed her eyes, waiting for the visions to return...

A sharp collapse of her chest - taking her breath away like she had been punched with such a force that it bruised her ribs. 

///  

Several people crowded into the annex, a weight of goodbye in their chests, not knowing if they would ever have the chance to return to the people they were leaving. 

Bas pulled up a seat in the corner of the room,  waiting for Harlow to focus on him completely before he spoke. His eyes were scanning the room in search for their sister, waiting on her, not knowing any reason why she wasn't there. 

Bas sighed, dropping his head to shield his grief from his brother, not wanting him to bare the added worry of wondering what was making him upset. 

"Harlow, I need you to tell you something." He tried to liven his voice up, but it didn't sound convincing. 

"Are you leaving again? Is that why Fabe is down here, too?" He asked. 

Bas nodded, pursing his lips together in a forced smile. He looked up at Fabian who held his younger brother on his lap. 

"Is Lyra going with you?" He jumped to his next question. 

"Yeah, she is this time." 

"Oh..." Harlow muttered, interrupting his brother once again. "So does that mean that you're going to be gone a while? Did... Did I do something wrong to make you both leave again?" 

"No." Bas breathed out. There was a terrible pain pounding in his chest. "No, Harlow, you haven't done anything wrong, okay? Do you understand?" 

Harlow nodded in reply, but the look in his face revealed everything. 

Bas scooted forward in his seat, their knees touching, his hands engulfing Harlow's as he held them tightly. 

"Elara needs our help. She's lost, and we have to help her find her way home. Does that make sense?" 

Harlow nodded again, seeming to accept the news a little easier when he learnt that they were leaving to help Elara. 

"But you're coming back, right?" 

Bas sighed. How could he tell his little brother that what they were doing could get both him and Lyra killed? He had been preparing himself to break the reality to Harlow, but now that it was here, now that the fear in his eyes was staring right back at him, he couldn't do it. 

"Of course, bud. I'll never leave you." 

Harlow smiled, finally, innocently leaning forward to hug Bas, not understanding why he held him back so tightly, or why he held on a little longer when he tried to pull away. 

Bas kissed the top of his head, then, ruffled his hair in his hands. "Fabian will be with you until I get back. Make sure you listen to him, okay?" 

Harlow rolled his eyes, parting from the conversation and wandering across the annex to explore. 

Bas exhaled, hesitating to walk away, but knowing that the fear would only consume him if he stayed any longer. He made his way up the stairs of the annex leading into Joren's room, unable to notice anything other than the terrified look on his sister's face, anxiously waiting to hear how it went. 

Deep down, Bas wanted to hurt Lyra the same way she had hurt him, but as he climbed up to the ground, he knew he couldn't do that without hurting Harlow as well. 

Giving in to his heart, Bas made his way over to her, surprising them both by what he said. 

"You should go say goodbye to him." He gave her permission. 

Lyra, unable to express her gratitude in that second, couldn't do anything more than wrap her arms around him, completely failing at words. Bas stood there, not raising his arms to hug back, afraid to let her in again. 

Feeling his absence, Lyra pulled away, nervous to look up at him. 

"This is for Harlow, not you." Bas told her. "I don't know if you're planning on sticking around after the war is over, or if you'll just disappear again, but Harlow deserves closure. I'm not going to be the one to take that away from him." 

"Are you saying you'd let me come to Basilisk after the war." 

Bas looked away from her. "That decisions down to Riverly, not me." 

"But you'd want me to stay?" 

Anger returned to Bas. A feeling he held back for the sake Harlow. He couldn't tell if she was asking just to hurt him again. 

"Of course we'd want our sister here, Lyra. Did you forget everything I said to you outside the gates? How many times I begged you to come inside-" 

"No, no, I know." Lyra shook her head, cutting him off. "I just meant that, after everything I've done, you could still find a place for me in your life... I wasn't expecting to hear that from you, that's all I was trying to say." 

"You should go and to talk Harlow. We're leaving soon." He answered after a moment, not responding to what she had said. He couldn't bring himself to open up those wounds again, especially with everything at stake. 

Disappointed, Lyra brushed past Bas and made her way into the annex to find Harlow. 

He seemed confused to see her for a moment, maybe forgetting that she had ever come back, but was relieved nonetheless to see her. 

He called her name, leaving Fabian in an instant to run into her arms. 

Lyra couldn't help but laugh, spinning him around as his feet dangled a few inches above the floor. She set him down, not used to how big he had grown in their time apart. 

"I need to tell you something." Lyra echoed her brother's words, holding onto his hands. She crouched down on the spot, meeting his eye level. 

"I know what it is!" His voice perked up, not recognizing the depth to her emotions. "Bas already told me." He informed her. 

"I know. But I want you to hear it from me." Lyra smiled sadly. 

"I'm sorry for leaving you and Bas before. I'm sorry that I didn't think about how scary everything was here on the Ground without mum and Hayzel." 

Harlow stared at his feet, overwhelmed the lump he could feel in the back of his throat, not knowing why he couldn't get that feeling to go away. 

"I thought you were gone like that, too." Harlow said to her. "I thought you were gone in the way that you can't come back." 

Lyra nodded, hearing what he was saying. Her eyes were completely drowned in tears, and she wiped harshly at her cheeks to shield the guilt from him. 

"I shouldn't have left you like that. You were worth an explanation. You were worth better than me." 

"But you're going away again?" 

"Hopefully not for long. We have to help our family. But... I want to promise you something. Is that okay?" 

Harlow nodded, his eyes lighting up as he stuck his pinky finer out for Lyra to wrap her's around. 

Lyra beamed over at him, following his actions. "I promise I'll come back to you. All of you." 

Harlow smiled, shaking their entwined fingers up and down. "I promise to wait here until you do." 

Finding a fleeting feeling of redemption in his response, Lyra let go of his hand and moved to pull him into her hold. She placed her hand on the back of his head, holding him close against her, unable to fathom how she could have ever chosen to leave such a precious soul. She had made up her mind: if Sol would let her, she would be a Basilisk. She would be a part of her own family once again. 

////

On the other side of the room, there was someone else saying goodbye to their brother, terrified that something would happen that would keep them apart longer than they were preparing for. 

Jonas - a little older than Harlow - understood the danger Noah was putting himself in. Having experienced the wrath of their father, Jonas was terrified that Rogue would do something to his brother, far worse than what had been done to him. 

"I don't want you to go." He confessed, too upset to look up at Noah. 

"I know. I don't want to have to leave you, either, but I'm doing this so you can be safe." Noah looked around the annex, shifting closer to Jonas to no one could overhear. 

"I have to go back to our people, one last time; and when I return, I won't be king anymore. Riv-" he sighed, afraid to face the hope he had in her promise, "River said we could stay here after the war. We don't have to go back home. We don't have to be Riders anymore." 

"But what about dad?" 

"I'm sorry, Jonas. But I can't let you near him again. I can't trust that he won't hurt you." 

"No." He argued. "I mean, when he finds out we're here! Aren't Basilisk the enemy? Dad will find us." 

Noah shook his head. "No. We're the enemy." He told him, revealing the truth about their people. "I'll take care of dad. He won't ever touch you again." 

Jonas exhaled, searching Noah's face for an answer. "You're going to kill him, aren't you?" 

"I-" Noah choked, suddenly feeling so monstrous, feeling like his brother was ashamed of him. "I'm sorry I let you down." 

"I was just going to say, be careful." 

Noah looked up at him, overthrown by his grace - his understanding that outweighed any other 7 year old's. 

"I know you always do what's right. Because no one in this world loves me more than you, because you're my brother." 

"That's right." Noah told him. No one else he could love more. 

Then, the reason that he was here dawned on him, and Noah reminded himself that he couldn't leave until he had said what he needed to. 

"Jonas..." His voice was delicate enough at having to say his name. "If I don't see you again..." 

"Why are you saying that?" The young boy interrupted. 

"Because I have to. Because I'm afraid of what might happen, and not being able to tell you what I need to." 

"But nothing is going to happen to you." It sounded like Jonas was trying to convince himself more than anybody else, refusing to accept that there was a severe chance Riders would turn on them after their betrayal. 

"You're probably right, and it's not really different than any other time I've had to go, but..." He sighed. "Well, I need you to know: I love you the most. You're the best thing I'll ever have." 

"Promise me you'll live." Jonas refused to accept what he was saying. "Promise me that you won't die out there." 

Noah's heart shattered inside his chest, every fracture tearing him apart from the inside out. "I can't promise you that. I can't let you down. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to try. And hey, it's just a precaution. I just needed you to know that in case I don't get a chance to say it again... We'll be fine, you and me." 

Jonas whimpered slightly, his body shivering with fear. He wrapped his arms around Noah's waist, and pressed the side of his face against his stomach, soaking his shirt with his tears. 

It took everything inside Noah not to give in right there: to not beg Sol to let him stay in the annex with his brother so he wouldn't have to leave. 

He squeezed onto him, almost having to pry him from his body, forcing him to stand straight and look at him. 

"You will see me again." Noah declared. "You have to be strong. You're everything to me. Everything." 

Jonas forced himself to nod, wiping his nose, and under his eyes to be brave for Noah. "I'll see you again." 

He crashed into him one last time, refusing to let his tears blind him from seeing his brother's face, and after a moment, he found the courage to let go. 

"Love you, Noah." He whispered. 

"I know." He murmured back, giving him the words he needed to hear. "Love you too, kid." 

Noah had to turn himself away and force himself up the ladder, stopping at the top to take one last glance at his brother before the exit sealed behind him. 

There was a weakness in his chest, like something was missing. Like a part of him had died a little bit, and he didn't work the same. The only thing that mattered was seeing him again. he knew if he didn't, he would break Jonas' soul beyond repair. 

Six // Part Three
Because no one else in this world loves me more than you.
Because you're my brother.

A chapter full of goodbyes.

02/02/2020 || 1 week. 💙