fucked up
uhh,,, um.... so- i kind of swear in this one a little bit :0
---
i think that i
fucked up
i seem to always be
doing that
though
you should
know me well enough
to know that
by now
but maybe you
weren't paying
attention
to my words
the way i was
paying attention
to yours
maybe you didn't
care
there wasn't any
reason
to care
because i was just
another
hurting
girl
who wanted you to
love her
but you didn't
i don't blame you
i don't
love me
either
but i do
love you
i think that i
fucked up
i'm not even sure
how
maybe my
pettiness
got the best of me
that one day
i know you know
what i'm
talking about
or maybe you don't
because i cared
so deeply
about you
slipping
away
from
me
but you didn't
seem to
give a fuck
even
if i
disappeared
i think that i
fucked up
but that doesn't mean
i stopped loving you
it only means
that i lost control
for a second
why can't i
lose control
and not
lose people
i'm not good at
sharing
my emotions
and i did
maybe two nights
before the
line went dead
and you
went silent
so was it that?
did you realize
that you deserved
someone
whole?
i think i
fucked up
because i always
seem
to fuck up
good things
like my
friendships
and my
family
and myself
but it's fine
to put
scars in my skin
and
wounds in my mind
because
i
don't
matter
not to me, at least
i thought i
mattered
to you
i guess i don't
that's fine
i think i
fucked up
and it's late at night
and i'm not even
sure
why the hell
i care enough about
a girl i just met
a month ago
to be writing this
but here i am
sometimes
you fall hard for
people
i have four
broken bones
and three
bruised ribs
my two
angel wings
are all
torn up
and my heart
is in pieces
i guess i
fell
straight onto
concrete
while you
stood by
because you didn't
love me
enough to
catch me
i think i
fucked up
i wish i could
take back
all my
hurtful words
and
shameful actions
i wish i could
take back
the place in
your heart
that i once
occupied
though someone
else
probably
owns it
now
that's okay
i never
belonged
on your
shelf
of polished golden
trophies
i belonged in the
dumpsters
out back
the trash bags
you drag from your
job
working at the
kitchen
of that
strawberry farm
i know
i know
i think
i fucked up
and this is
getting long
and it is
getting old
but so is life
and it was
until you
came along
with your
smile
and your
stupidly amazing
personality
i hate you
i hate you for
making me
weak
again
i hate you for
taking me
out of my
misery
even if it was
just for moments
i hate you for
letting me
fantasize
because you said
you might have
feelings
i knew
i knew
i knew
i knew how this
was going to
end
i hate you for
making me believe
it could have been
happily
ever
after
i think
i fucked up
and i don't know
how to
fix it
fix you
fix us
fix me
please don't walk away.
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