You know how pretty much everyone's parents keep every drawing, letter, picture, etc from their kid's childhood and never ever EVER throw that shit away? Well, today, my Mother pulled out the "memory box."

Oh joy.

A few things I learned about myself:

My spelling was shit.
My grammar was shit.
My art was shit.

And also, I wrote books.

...

Yeah, no joke. Even at age 5 I was writing books. Granted they were no good, but still.

Honestly, I had no idea I wrote. I don't remember doing any of this stuff at all, but I stumbled upon my first book, and oh my god it's so ridiculous I just had to share it with you guys.

Bear in mind, I'm 5 years old when I wrote this story XD....

And just to give you a good idea about how this story was written, I'm not correcting my spelling/grammar errors and I'm gonna let you guys strain to read it and figure out what the fuck I'm saying XD XD XD

Also, there will be 2 versions of the story. First version will be just the story, and the second version will be the story constantly interrupted by me and I make snarky comments in bolded letters about dumb shit in the book. Enjoy reading both versions XD XD XD

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VERSION ONE

The Story of the Missing Ranbow

By: Serena
Illistrated By: Serena

Once apon a time there was a rabit that got up early every morning to see the rainbow! But one morning the rabhit took one look at the rainbow and... The colors were gone! This could only mean 1 thing!

...

Nogler took the colors!

So the rabit went to Vary to tell her what happened. She gasped and got him a potion she said... "Here take this put this in Noglers mouth!" "You have 3 days by the Third sunset it will be to late!

So the rabit Traveled Through the forest of Dreaming and to the fountain of caring. Then finally he reached Noglers castle. he climed up the stairs into his bedroom he took his sleeping drops and poured it in. The rabbit quickly ran to Noglers dungun. He freed the rainbow prinses and took her to the land of color. Then she spoke... Ranbow rainbow most butiful of all bring the color back to all!

So then all the people, crechers and animals were returned with there colors! And the rainbow prinses went back to her castle and the all lived happily ever after!

Oh! Oh! Oh! That 3rd night Nogler got dressed for bed he brushed his teeth and hair went to his little Table were the rabit put the potion!!!!!!!!! Nogler took the cup to his bed and drank all of is he fell asleep and durring that night and Nogler turned back into himself and Nogler was a aa aa aaa TURTLE?

Every thing Nogglerler put a spell on turned back to normal. Including him!

The end.

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VERSION TWO (AUTHOR'S COMMENTARY INCLUDED)

The Story of the Missing Ranbow

By: Serena
Illistrated By: Serena

Once apon a time there was a rabit that got up early every morning to see the rainbow! But one morning the rabhit took one look at the rainbow and... The colors were gone! This could only mean 1 thing!

Stop. Just stop right there. I can't even spell rabbit? WHAT THE FUCK?! *table flip* AND RAINBOW TOO???? Also, why the fuck is the main character a rabbit? Dumb book...grumble grumble mutter mutter...

...

Nogler took the colors!

Nogler? NOGLER? WHO THE FUCK IS NOGLER AND WHAT KIND OF NAME IS THAT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK *commence table flip*

So the rabit went to Vary to tell her what happened. She gasped and got him a potion she said... "Here take this put this in Noglers mouth!" "You have 3 days by the Third sunset it will be to late!

I didn't close the quote, and I have two separate quotes for the same person talking with nothing in between... *slaps self across the face*

So the rabit Traveled Through the forest of Dreaming and to the fountain of caring. Then finally he reached Noglers castle. he climed up the stairs into his bedroom he took his sleeping drops and poured it in. The rabbit quickly ran to Noglers dungun. He freed the rainbow prinses and took her to the land of color. Then she spoke... Ranbow rainbow most butiful of all bring the color back to all!

WHY AM I CAPITALIZING SHIT IN THE MIDDLE OF SENTENCES NONONONONO NOOOOOO!!!!

Wait, rainbow princess? Are you shitting me? This book is just total fu---*commence very loud censor*

Dungeon? Beautiful? IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO FUCKING SPELL THOSE WORDS WHY WAS I SUCH A DUMB SHIT.

The fountain...of...caring...? *barfs* I need to read TTTDU death scenes again to make me feel better after seeing that mushy shit...

The land of color? THE LAND OF COLOR? *bangs head on desk and stays there* my god...why...

So then all the people, crechers and animals were returned with there colors! And the rainbow prinses went back to her castle and the all lived happily ever after!

Creatures. I tried to say creatures, but said 'crechers.' Also, creatures are the same thing as animals. This....is some dumb shit.

Oh! Oh! Oh! That 3rd night Nogler got dressed for bed he brushed his teeth and hair went to his little Table were the rabit put the potion!!!!!!!!! Nogler took the cup to his bed and drank all of is he fell asleep and durring that night and Nogler turned back into himself and Nogler was a aa aa aaa TURTLE?

What. He's a fucking turtle? WHY THE HELL DID I MAKE HIM A TURTLE?? The picture I shittily drew as a five year old child shows him as a wizard one second and as a turtle the next.

What the fuck. Seriously, the fuck is wrong with me? A TURTLE, OF ALL POSSIBLE CREATURES IN EXISTENCE!

Every thing Nogglerler put a spell on turned back to normal. Including him!

I misspelled my own OC's name after writing it 50 times in the story. *dies*

The end.

...that sucked. What the fuck was I thinking when I wrote this. Why did my Mother keep this for twelve years. Why the fuck did she let me write this shit.

Just... What the fuck.

That is all. I hope you guys enjoyed experiencing my pain, misery, and complete embarrassment.

...

Fucking Nogler...