Chapter 15: Mosque. 

*

"When he smiles, 

I smile. 

When I see those dimples, 

I cry. 

He makes me happy. 

He makes me whole. 

I love him like my own. 

Yet 

He can never know"

-2am-

*

To people. To people. To freaking people?! That was all I was to him? A mere person?

"You look like you about to murder someone" Aanabia looked up to see her sister smiling brightly at her.

"Maybe I will. Who knows?" she retorted, before going back to glare at the table in front of her. Nahal shrugged and took a seat on the other couch, turning on the TV. The sound of Tom and Jerry filled the room. Aanabia took out her phone and opened Instagram, going through her feed.

"Hey" Nahal's voice cut through the cartoon sounds, reaching to Aanabia. She looked up from her phone with a frown.

"What is it?"

"Look. I know Macbeth went from no murder to murder in one afternoon, but can you not? I mean mom is having a hard time dealing with cases anyway" Aanabia narrowed her eyes at the mocking of her sister.

"Of course. Did I tell you, you were adopted?" she remarked and Nahal rolled her eyes.

"Of course. Use the you-are-adopted-younger-sibling card to pave your way though"

Aanabia let out a small laugh, folding her feet underneath her body on the couch.

"But seriously though, what happened?" she asked softly and Aanabia shrugged, putting her phone beside her and heaving a sigh.

"Remember I went to give him donuts?" she said and Nahal nodded. "Well, apparently, he can't take sugar and lord knows why. When I asked, he said and I quote 'Nothing I can disclose to people'" she air quoted his sentence.

"And you are annoyed why?"

"Damn it Nahal. How hard is it to decipher that I like the guy? Just how hard?" she questioned, with frustration lacing her voice.

I am pretty sure he knows that I like him.

"And he knows?"

"I am sure he does"

"You told him then"

"No"

I wish I could.

"Then how do you know he knows for certain?"

"Because everyone with eyes and common sense can tell I like the guy. Why can't he?"

Like seriously. I get him donuts. I smile at him. I spent my time looking at him. Just looking at him. I literally know where he is and at what time. And I know him for over a week. So yes!

"Because you haven't told him straight up. I know you, Aapa. You are the kind of person who speaks out their mind. So why are you holding back now?" questioned Nahal. This got Aanabia thinking. She never held back her thoughts before. If anything, her mother reprimanded her for having no filter most of the times.

Maybe I should tell him.

"You should" smiled Nahal and Aanabia let out a small laugh.

"I should"

"Don't you fear rejection?" questioned Nahal after some time.

"Rejection?" repeated Aanabia and Nahal nodded, putting her chin on her folded knees on the sofa.

"Not really" replied Aanabia, tilting her head slightly. Rejection. I never understood the term properly. I mean if there is a no, there is always a chance of a yes. Just like how a yes can turn into a no, right?

"Take the chance. Either it will be a yes or a no. There is no maybe in between" she replied and Nahal let out a small laugh.

"Unless Yazdan says so" she said, raising her eyebrows and shrugging before turning to the TV. Aanabia rolled her eyes at her younger sister.

-

Saturday afternoon, the rain was drizzling slowly and people were busy with the preparation for the small prayer at the local mosque. Of course Yahyah and Nahal had to decline due to their dinner with Iqraam Ibrahim, but Zaiha being her, decided to ask the clients to join them for the prayers. Since Iqraam was a man of religion and values, he gladly agreed.

Aanabia stood in front of the mirror, staring at her reflection. Her cheeks felt hollow and she felt the need to bring out color in them. She did not understand why she felt down. Maybe it was the weather? Maybe it was something to do with the fact that Yazdan might see other better women for himself today. But a part of her said he would not. He was not someone who would do such a thing. Which was why she liked him in the first place.

He was calm and serene. Everything, she was not. He complemented her perfectly.

"You done yet?" called out Nahal from outside the bedroom door. Aanabia sniffed and looked away from her reflection. She did not know thinking about him would bring tears in her eyes.

"Almost" she replied, taking a tissue and wiping away the tears. She did minimum makeup today, mostly because she didn't feel like it. Putting on her tassel ear rings, she flipped her hair back and began combing it. The silk strands of hair felt familiar in her hands. She decided to do an updo, instead of leaving it down like always.

Several minutes later, she was done. She took her dupatta that came with her kurti and walked out towards the door. By the door, she took her phone and wallet before walking out.

"Where is mom?" she asked, as she padded down the stairs towards Nahal. Nahal looked up to her and let out a frown.

"What is wrong with you?" she questioned, without missing a beat. Aanabia let out a sigh and a shrug, too tired to explain. She didn't even know why she felt that way.

"Where is mom?" questioned Aanabia, her voice barely audible.

"She is at work. She said she would meet us there. Now lets go" Nahal replied before walking towards the door and wearing her shoes. Aanabia did the same after locking the house behind her.

"Lets go"

Nahal drove to the local mosque, a few streets down from their house in her Toyota Sai. It was a beautiful vehicle that she and Aanabia shared, the later mostly opting for public transport rather than the car. Nahal parked it in the car park and got off, putting the dupatta of her outfit over her head and covering up, much like what Aanabia did.

"Lets go" she smiled at her sister before linking arms and locking the car. The two sisters were about to cross when they saw Yahyah's car enter the parking lot. Since the rain had subsided for a little while, the two decided to wait for Zaiha since she was new and barely knew people around.

Aanabia found herself looking at Yazdan, as he exited the car. She smiled brightly at him and he nodded ever so slightly at her before turning to Zul. Yahyah told Zaiha something before she kissed the forehead of the boys and walking over to the girls.

"As salaam alaikum, aunty" they said in unison and Zaiha replied, kissing their cheeks.

"You two look lovely as ever" she said and the girls grinned at her.

"Thank you. And you too" winked Nahal and Zaiha laughed.

"I am an old lady" she remarked and Nahal brushed it off with a wave. Aanabia smiled at their closeness. It was a sad one.

"Ah, right. Mrs. Ibrahim is coming today too. So we have to wait around for her. She knows no one here" said Zaiha and the girls nodded. As if on cue, Ruqayyah Ibrahim exited the white Saden with her husband, standing by the open passenger seat door. She smiled at him (not seen by the world due to her niqab but understood by her husband due to the years together) before taking a few steps away from the door. Iqraam Ibrahim shut the door and locked the car before walking to where the boys were. They then, walking over to Zaiha.

"As salaam alaikum" the couple said together, causing Nahal to giggle slightly. She was officially their fan.

"Wa alaikum mus salaam" the girls and Zaiha replied. Zaiha smiled at Iqraam and Ruqayyah, silently blessing them.

"This is my mother" Yahyah introduced and then introduced Aanabia who smiled brightly at them.

"As bright as your sister" said Iqraam and turned to his wife.

"I shall leave you with them. Allah hafiz" he said the former in a rather low tone and the latter in a high one. Zaiha took Ruqayyah's hands and smiled at her.

"Feel free" she said and Ruqayyah nodded, before the girls hooked an arm around in each of hers and walked towards the mosque. The boys followed suite.

-

The ladies side of the mosque was rather lively. Women and children mingled around and talked, waiting for the program to start. Aanabia took a seat on the floor, by the wall and Ruqayyah took one beside her followed by Nahal on the other side of Ruqayyah. Zaiha set on the other side of Nahal.

"So what exactly happens in these gatherings?" questioned Ruqayyah and Zaiha nodded at her question.

"Since Ramadhan is around the corner, these gatherings will become often until Ramadhan when it is every day. It is basically a prayer kind of thing for the community to get together and discuss issues. Like a community Muslims association thing." Explained Nahal and the women nodded.

"So Ruqayyah, where are you from?" asked Zaiha.

"Originally Bloemfontein, South Africa but shifted to Durban a few years before marrying Iqraam" she said, the niqab hiding the blush.

Nahal cooed at her.

"That is so adorable. I would probably die here alone" she muttered and Ruqayyah let out a small laugh.

"Allah has created everyone in pairs, surely there is someone for you" she told Nahal and Aanabia raised an eyebrow at her words. She knew that but she never really thought about it. She leaned into the conversation of the two.

"Aha. Right." Zaiha watched Nahal's mocking smile with an amused one of hers.

"So how did you know he was the one? Mr. Ibrahim, that is" questioned Nahal, with her inquisitive brown eyes. Aanabia hit her head lightly, causing Ruqayyah to turn to her.

"I am sorry for her questions. She tends to be a curious cat" explained Aanabia and Ruqayyah shook her head.

"It is alright. The answer was clear after Istikhara I guess" The girls stared at her, with blank looks. Ruqayyah figured they did not understand the whole Istikhara concept.

"Istikhara is a prayer done for decisions and things like that." The girls nodded.

Aanabia knew what the prayer was but she never heard someone tell her that they got answers based on that. She never met someone who did. Maybe they did but never shared or something.

"Ah so you prayed and you knew" said Nahal and Ruqayyah nodded.

"Nice. I like this idea of Istikharah"she muttered to herself and Ruqayyah let out a laugh, tapping her head playfully. She then realized what she did and apologized immediately.

"It is fine. I am used to it anyway" replied Nahal and Aanabia smiled at the younger sister. She looked away from the two and scanned the people around her. There was the aunty from two houses down, the other one from three houses down and there was the surveillance aunty from the following street and her daughters. There were mothers, young and old, seated with their children; a few running around like hooligans. Aanabia sighed. Typical Middleton. But she loved it anyway.

"Oh my god! Aanabia, is that you?!" Oh Allah, why? 

****

Anyone else dying after seeing Kim Namjoon? Because I know I am. 

How can someone be so beautiful, masha allah? Like makes me want to cry and smile and laugh at the same time. Jeez. Stop Namjoonie. You will be the death of me. 

Okay thank you. hhaha. 

Feedback? 

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xx,

-aalihha.