After seeing Johan in the psychiatric unit and witnessing Dad being open with every member of my family, I could honestly say that for the last few years, my life had been nothing but a series of shocking events. Frankly, I didn't know if I should be elated or frustrated about this development. Maybe a little bit of both? It would be a lie to say I wasn't relieved to see Johan slowly realizing all of his psychological problems weren't 100 % his fault (Dad had a hand in creating this chaos), but it wouldn't be wise to set aside the fact that I was also disappointed that it took so long for Dad to do what he should have done right at the very moment he had a change in his heart about disowning my brother. I wasn't sure if I bought Dad's explanation that he felt remorseful as soon as the hateful words escaped his mouth those many years ago at the dinner table. Since I wasn't convinced of Dad's version of the whole repentance stuff, I spent the whole time driving from the mental hospital to my home silently constructing my own version.

In my version, I imagined Dad listening to a sermon in which the pastor quoted the book of Timothy. There was a passage in that book about a parent's responsibility to his children, more specifically a father's responsibility to his son if I recall correctly (I haven't read the Bible in a long time since I declared myself an agnostic), something like how God condemned fathers who didn't provide for their sons because denying the sons any provision was worse than being an unbeliever. In my imagination, something like remorse (but not as powerful) stabbed Dad's heart when he heard the sermon and he thought something along the line of how awful he was to Johan and how true it was that disowning a son was even more terrible than denying Christ.

"You are spacing out." Moira's soft voice and her hand on top of mine on the steering wheel took me out of my daydreaming. "Careful that you don't crash onto the garage door."

"Whoops," I said sheepishly as I slowed my car down and got ready to automatically open the garage door. "Thanks for catching me in the middle of my daydream, honey. Sorry about it."

"It's been a tiring day," she said as I finished parking the car and unlocking the back door to the kitchen. "What'd you like to do for the rest of the evening? Are you going to listen to music?"

"I'm thinking of just sitting on our porch tonight, gazing at the stars," I replied to her as I made my way to the living room and grabbed two sets of knitted giant blankets and some pillows from the couch. "Wanna join me? We can have hot apple cider too and you can cuddle with Linda's dogs. Heh, those dogs are so dang cute I could hardly believe they belong to someone in prison!" I shook my head and Moira just smiled as she let little Baxter and Roscoe out of their crate.

"Woof!" Baxter jumped up and down under my legs as soon as he was out of the crate. "Woof!" he barked again as I bent to hug him. Roscoe barked too and licked my cold fingers. Moira laughed and picked him up. The dog wagged his short tail and licked my wife's nose.

"Yeah, they're flipping adorable!" Moira nodded. "Alright, Nardho, you go set up those blankets nicely and I'll warm up the cider, okay? And boys," she gestured to the ecstatic dogs to hurriedly follow me outside. "Keep him company while I'm preparing the drinks, okay? Good boys."

"Aw, honey, you talk to these dogs as if they are your babies and you their mom!" I kissed the top of her head before heading out with our furry friends. "You'd have made a good mom."

Moira's face turned scarlet before she grinned and hurried to the drawers where we kept our mugs and coasters. It made my heart swell with a lot of warmth to see her blush like when she was a girl. Come to think of it, when was the first time I made her blush? When did she make me? As I asked myself those questions, a memory of us kissing for the first time flashed through my eyes. We were so innocent back then and our only worry was whether I could survive our freshman year of college. What the hell happened to our innocence and why couldn't we keep it?

---

"Close your eyes, Moira, and come closer," I said to my girlfriend as we stood before a majestic waterfall and were surrounded by the flapping of hundreds of giant butterfly wings. Johan was right about Golden Valley being the most romantic place in all of Red Sycamore. When I return from this study abroad trip, I should thank my xenobiologist older brother for recommending that I take the girl who stole my heart to what essentially is proof that Paradise does exist.

"My eyes are closed," the beautiful girl said and I timidly put one hand on her hip while the other caressed the back of her neck. "What are we doing, Nardho? Is this a surprise for me?"

"It sort of is. Stay where you are now and trust me." I closed the gaps between us as I took a step forward. Her breath was warm and it tickled as I felt it against my skin. "I'm in love with you," I whispered. I wasn't sure she heard me. Maybe it was good that she didn't. I wouldn't want to scare her off in case she misinterpreted my statement to mean that I believed in love at first sight. I didn't, but the awe-struck feeling when I first saw her in person was similar.

With my eyelids shut, I brought my lips to hers. Her body tensed in my embrace as our lips brushed together, but the tension dissipated as I stroked her hair and she held onto me even tighter. My cheeks were hotter than an electric furnace blasting on full power and I bet she could feel the heat. Ignoring the burning sensation, I kept kissing her until both of us had to stop for air. When we pulled away, there was no doubt that we had turned into overripe tomatoes.

"That was very nice," she said with a blush that extended to her ears. "You were so gentle with me. I didn't know a kiss can be this nice," she raised her hands and cupped my face. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," I said as I became very interested in gazing at the tiny wildflowers that grew between the slippery rocks around the waterfall. I slipped my right hand into my jacket's pocket and my fingers hit something hard yet smooth. Oh right, my mini mixtape player from Mom.

"Here, you should take this!" I gave the mini-player to Moira. "My family collects ancient artifacts from 21st century Earth because of my mom's job as an archeologist. This thing plays songs. See the button right here? That's for shuffling. If you press it a random song would come on. I hope it plays my favorite song." I pointed to the liner note. "Read what that says, please."

"Andrew Belle, Oh My Stars, 2010." Moira read the note aloud. "Is this good music?"

"Only one way to find out!" I winked and she pressed the shuffle button. Miraculously, the exact song I was hoping for did come on and I mentally pumped my fist in a glorious triumph. Score!

As the voice of the late Mr. Belle sang about a promise some man made to a pretty woman, the prettiest girl in the whole universe leaned in for another tender kiss. I promptly obliged and, for a fleeting minute or two that I wished could last forever, we were lost in our own heaven.

---

I must have subconsciously chuckled to myself because the next thing I know was Moira bending down to set a tray of hot beverages on the picnic table before asking "what's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing, just remembering something extremely happy!" I said as I poured the apple cider from the thermos and carefully took a sip. "This is good, Moira. The cider is sweet but not sugary. You try some too, okay?" I handed her a cup. She replied with a quiet nod. We sat in silence until Roscoe decided to put his head on my lap and snored loudly as soon as he did so.

"Such a sleepy boy!" Moira laughed. "Hey Nardho, mind if I put my head on your shoulder?"

"Feel free," I said as she scooted closer. "It's been such a hectic year, hasn't it? All the more reasons to be grateful for rare moments like this. I've almost forgotten what peace feels like."

"Peace," she repeated slowly as if ruminating on each letter. "Honey, were our younger years peaceful? Were we happy in our marriage? I wish I could remember. Sometimes I come close to remembering but then the fog overwhelms me again and my mind... My mind just goes—"

"We were definitely happy, don't you worry." I put my arms around her and squeezed tight. "Tell me, Moira, when you said you were close to remembering, what did you mean? Did you see blurry glimpses of resurfacing memories or were they more like unfitting puzzle pieces?"

"More like vignettes of unrelated stuff, you get me?" she shrugged. "They're confusing, Nardho. One moment I would be in a cave with a headscarf-wearing person examining a pool of... I don't know, seahorses-dolphin creatures I guess, and the next moment I would be watching someone who looks kinda like you speaking to a Japanese lady in a white lab coat. This guy who looks like you, he always has such a sad expression, like... maybe... grief? Emotional pain?"

Did my wife just describe the Kulambas and our research into their biology led by Akira Kinoya? Could my hearing be playing some mean tricks on me? I asked her to be more detailed.

"This lady, she looks like she could be related to your brother's husband. Whenever she speaks, she sounds so kind, just like how Kenta is, if you know what I'm saying." Moira elaborated while holding my hand and brushing her thumb against it. "In my visions, I can only hear cryptic messages from her. Well, maybe they are not really cryptic but because I'm missing the context of our conversations they seem cryptic to me. Something about being a good partner?"

"A good partner? Is she talking about herself or about you? Maybe both?" I pondered aloud as the dogs whimpered in their sleep. I hummed a soothing lullaby and their whimpering ceased.

"She usually mentions some names... Ezie Swenson, Aiden, Baz, Kaoru... and the guy who looks like you usually would say things like "she's got good friends too and I do hope she knows I care, so don't you be worried for us" but I have no idea what it's all about. Maybe she's talking about your sister. Maybe this memory is related to a professor reminding you to pay attention to Nardhia. But this is where I got confused. Why am I the one getting these visions, not you?"

I wanted to squish Moira right then and right there for recalling a discussion I had with Akira many years in the past, but instead, I just smiled and told her the strange visions would probably get clearer if she could dutifully write down everything she saw each time they came to her.

"Yeah, I suppose journaling about them could help somehow," she said drowsily. "I'm getting so sleepy, Nardho. I don't think I can stay awake much longer to look at the stars with you."

"That's okay. Want me to carry you to bed?" I said half-jokingly. "You weigh almost nothing."

"You like pampering me, don't you?" she giggled softly. "Thanks, but I can go to bed myself."

---

I knew I was tired but, unlike my slumbering wife who was blissfully snoring away beside me, I stayed wide awake. My insomnia had been getting worse nowadays. I did have my sleeping pills but knowing that they had some nasty side effects like dry mouth, weight gain, and heartburn I tried not to depend on them too much. I sighed and played with Johan's small yet sparkly rosary beads on my wrist. It amazed me that after all this time the glued-on glitters on the beads still, well, glittered. I had no idea what kind of magic Kenta did when he crafted the rosary for Johan as a teen, but maybe it was simply the magic of love. Oh man, here I was getting into an overly sappy mood. To be fair, I deserved to think of sappy things given how my life had been, right?

"Thank you for keeping my brother mostly sane throughout the ups and downs of growing up," I mouthed as I rubbed one bead between my fingers. "Keywords: mostly. I do hope he can remain sane. He has his moments of lucidity, but—"I bit my lips. "But they can be few and far between. Wait, what am I doing talking to a rosary? Whatever. My point is, if God exists, please have mercy on my brother. Did you create Johan just for your own amusement, God? Does it amuse you in a sick way to see him struggling to hang onto what sliver of sanity he has left?"

A jerky movement under the comforter snapped me out of my monologue. Moira was thrashing around wildly like a fish out of water. I called her name repeatedly and when she didn't respond I pinched her arm. Still no response. I pinched harder and she grunted but didn't wake up.

"What's wrong?" I shook her several times. "Is it another nightmare? I'm here. It's just a nightmare. Whatever is trying to hurt you, I'll chase them away." I whispered as her jerking slowed down. "Whatever you are, stop hurting my wife like this!" I hissed at the darkness of our bedroom. I could have sworn that the darkness hissed back, but it was just my brain lying to me.

"Nardho... the coat-wearing woman...Rain...Fish eggs...Depression..." Moira started to mumble in her sleep. "Lee...Gibran...Helping each other...Camaraderie," she continued mumbling. "Looking for hope...Not giving up....Nardho...Sorry...Nardho..."

What kind of bizarre vision was my wife having? If only I could record her visions and have us watch and analyze them together when she's awake. Wait, there is a way to do exactly that!

"Hang in there, Moira!" I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek as I ran downstairs to my music studio. After turning the light on and rummaging through the knickknacks I kept in a huge box in the corner, I pulled a device that looked like an oversized digital canvas with colorful cables sticking from it. I rummaged some more and found the original manual it came with. I scanned the table of contents and flipped to the page about recording and storing a sequence of dreams.

"Uh, so the password to activate the recording command is K&G Blanche and there is a second password to store the recording..." I muttered. "Neesa's favorite dessert is the password. Oh well, muffin it is..." I kept on muttering as I read more of the instructions. "Damnit, Neesa, your boyfriend Keith is a genius but he does make his version of Somnodora a pain in the ass to operate. Wait, another password? What for? Oh, for replaying the recording, I see. Huh, what's this, George's business? A pizzeria. Damnit, Keith, these passwords are way too easy..."

After tinkering with Keith's Somnodora, I brought the device upstairs and, after securing the neuropathway pads to Moira's scalp (she unbelievably stayed asleep throughout this ordeal, what a heavy sleeper!), I hooked the recorder to a computer that would project Moira's dreams.

"We're getting your memories back, honey," I put her head on my lap. "Just be patient."

---

The white screen of the video player burst with colors as the scene of Moira's dreams took over. Standing next to the younger versions of me, my girlfriend, and Akira were Rain, Hamza, Izumi, Vannie, and Alex. All of us were holding lanterns as we observed a group of glowing seahorses.

"Everyone is here." Akira nodded curtly. "Gibran and Risma said they would be running a bit late as they're assembling a Kulambas portable aquarium with Tony, Nardhia, Ayumi, and Deandra. Well, I guess we can begin our observation while we wait for the aquarium. Shall we?"

"Yes, I'm excited!" Vannie gave the scientist a thumbs up. "Rain, could you help me out of the wheelchair so that I could touch one of the Kulambas eggs? I'd do it in the gentlest way possible, no worries," she quickly added when Moira shot her a disapproving glare. "I'm just curious about them. I want to know what makes the eggs so shiny and if they are warm to the touch."

Easy does it, Rain signed as they helped their partner steady herself before leading her to the shallow tidal pool in the dark cave. Hey, there's a group of baby Kulambas peeking from behind the seagrasses! Shall I pick one of the cuties up for you, Vannie? Here, hold her carefully.

"How do you know this baby is a female?" Moira asked them. "Is it the color of the tails?"

"I think it is a combination of the color and the shape of the tails," Izumi chimed in. "This is a blink-and-you-miss-it detail that can be easily missed, but I remember Risma and Gibran once showed in an introductory video about the ocean-dwelling creatures of Black Elm that female Kulambas have cobalt-colored tails the shape of an anchor and male ones have jade-colored tails the shape of a crescent moon. So, yeah, anchor for females and crescent moon for males."

"I wonder if these Kulambas are symbols of good luck for seafaring men and women of the Crystal Lilacs tribe," Alex put a hand on his chin. "Or for any tribe in Amethyst Archipelago for that matter. Oh Hamza, here, feel the tails of the baby Kulambas. Can you make out the shapes?"

"Somewhat, yep." Hamza smiled. "These babies are so squishy. It almost feels wrong to touch them but this is for science," his smile grew wider. "And I'd be gentle, Moira, I promise."

"You better!" my girlfriend watched him like a hawk. "These babies are precious itty bitty."

"Itty bitty?" Akira howled in a fit of laughter. "Aww, Nardho, your partner is too cute with her love for animals. Hey, you're taking care of her, right? I'm lucky I have a good partner like Ezekiel, so I wanna make sure Moira is lucky too. Do you remember Ezie Swenson, yes, and Aiden? You and your sister were like toddlers when Ezie and I began dating, though..."

"His name is familiar but I don't think I remember much else." I nodded politely. "Was he the guy with a cute grey cat following him around? Or the guy with a long and elegant ponytail?"

"Ahaha, no. He's the older blond guy, Aiden's bro. The cat guy is Baz and the ponytail guy is Kaoru. Anyway, back to my question. Are you taking good care of sweet Moira? Be honest."

"I'm going to answer it so you know it's the truth, okay?" my girlfriend spoke up. "Nardho is struggling to take care of himself but I want you to know that although he can barely look after himself he does love me so much and I can feel his genuine love. It's not always easy to see but, to quote an ancient text I borrowed from Kenta, the essential isn't visible to the naked eye and must be felt by the heart. I know in my heart, Akira, that Nardho is very caring."

"That's great to hear, girlie!" Akira grinned widely and went back to scooping up some samples of seagrasses, onto which some clusters of Kulambas eggs clung. As Vannie had pondered, the eggs were indeed warm to the touch. Warmer than a woolly mitten on a snowy day, I would say.

"I like these eggs," I told Moira. "I wonder if the shells hardened as the Kulambas embryos inside matured. Hm, do the eggshells contain minerals necessary for the growth of seagrasses?"

"That's a plausible theory and one I've been researching too!" Akira said with unmissable excitement in her voice. "Oh yeah, my research is extensive. Not only have I developed software to track the growth of seagrasses and algae, but I'm also developing another software to track what kind of chemical compounds they need to thrive and how much. Meanwhile, Ezie, through his job as a medically-trained nutritionist for a big hospital, is studying if the minerals possibly deposited by the Kulambas eggs onto the seagrasses have nutritional values."

"It would be excellent if they do!" Moira chimed in and scribbled on her notebooks. From the corner of my eyes, I spied Vannie giving her a look of approval. Ah yeah, the ever-studious girl.

"You know who's gonna get all excited about nutrition and minerals? Tony. Anyway, what's taking that gym rat and our professors so long?" I grumbled. "Is assembling an aquarium that hard? Maybe someone is ought to check on them just in ca—"a tap on the shoulder cut me off.

"He's here!" my sister pointed to the cave's entrance, where my best friend and our professors stood with a cart full of sturdy-looking aquariums. "And yes, assembling aquariums was harder than you'd think. There were so many different components and technicalities to account for."

"So the Kulambas eggs are real and not a myth? They do glow at midnight?" Tony ran to where the tidal pool was and Nardhia ran after him, yelling at him to slow down. "So cool, man!"

"The coolest!" Gibran held two thumbs up and exchanged knowing glances with Risma. "Wait until you guys hear Risma's joint research with Ayumi, sponsored by Deandra. Ladies?"

"This is actually something Lee and I had wanted to do alongside our research on the winged elephants, but last year we decided to focus on the Gaburs first as at that time they were even more in need of our attention than the Kulambas," Ayumi explained with a glimmer in her eyes that I interpreted as either pride for her line of work, nostalgia, or both. "Now that Deandra is in charge of the Gaburs enclosures in my village and Mr. Milton had agreed not to disturb the endangered species, we can finally get back to picking up where Lee left off with the Kulambas."

"Oh my goodness, Lee was truly a wonderful researcher!" Moira exclaimed with a glint of admiration in her eyes. "You hear that, Nardho? He researched not only one but two species."

"I heard that," I said as hot tears threatened to fall. "And now I miss the kind man even more."

"I'm sure you do," Risma put a hand on my shoulder sympathetically. "But that's all the more reason to keep on excelling in your academics. Gibran and I are here to offer help, Nardho."

"I know you are. I know everyone is. I'm so sorry that I'm still depressed despite—"

"Don't be sorry." Akira interrupted and everybody looked at her speechlessly. "My dad wouldn't want you to be sorry for feeling things so deeply. He'd be so proud that a student of his has the ability to feel deeply, just like him. Nardho, do you know the original reason my dad researched the Gaburs and the Kulambas? It's about time you and your lovely friends know."

"We're all ears," I said. "I have no doubt everyone here wants to honor Lee and his research."

"When I said my dad felt things so deeply, that included guilt. When my mom Chiharu Kinoya was dying from complications of multiple organ failure, my dad felt guilty about not being able to find a cure for her. He then heard a rumor among my mom's colleagues, a bunch of elite sociologists and mythologists, that there are some hybrid animals recorded in Indigo Infernoan legends as having the power to heal all kinds of ailments through the plants they came into contact with. My dad poured all of his energy into figuring out what combination of hybrid animals and plants are the ones the legends speak of. He came so close to having things figured out but then... but then the inevitable happ—"Akira stopped talking as her whole body shook.

"Life can be so unfair and cruel sometimes." Moira hugged her and Akira's trembling started to subside. "Losing parents is one of the worst thing a person could experience. But you know what, Akira? More often than not the people with the worst life experiences are the strongest. I mean," she gestured toward me. "Look at Nardho. He's so strong and I believe you are too."

"You're too kind." Akira sniffled. "Thank you. Anyway, back to my dad's studies. He found out that the shells of hatched Kulambas eggs are traditionally used by the Crystal Lilacs tribe to prevent the buildup of toxins in human kidneys. Combined with the hair from the tails of young Gaburs, the mixture can even reserve the effects of aging on molecular biology and cellular level. Of course, those are myths and have never been scientifically proven. This is what all of us here can investigate. Are you with me? Should we carry out this investigation to carry my dad's legacy?"

"You know the answer!" Moira and I said in unison. "Hell yeah, why the hell not?" I added.

"And I'm not even finished with my explanation, kids." Akira continued with even more energy in her voice. "The combination of Kulambas egg shells and Gaburs hair is believed to have the power to reserve memory loss when consumed together with a mystical plant. Now, the legends are not clear on what this plant actually is, but they do hint that the plant can be found in White Banyan. I do have some theories on what the plant actually is, I just need the help of a botanist."

"Your cousin is a botanist, right?" Moira instantly perked up. "Please go ask him to join our investigation! This is going to be so satisfying, all of us working together. Oh, oh, wait! Could the plant be that red flower that grows on ice on my home planet?"

"Crimson Yeast!" Vannie and I exclaimed at the same time.

---

The colors projected on my computer screen faded and the Somnodora made a noisy beeping sound. I unhooked all the cables from my computer and turned the dream-recording device off.

"Moira, wake up, honey. The dream is over." I removed the neuropathway pads from my wife's scalp. "I think we're one step closer to getting your memories back once and for all."

"Mmmhh..." Moira let out a sigh as she stirred and stretched. "How long was I asleep?"

"Long enough to dream an entire scene about a big research project we did our sophomore year of college," I told her as I helped her sit up in bed. "I remember the scene now, though. It really happened, Moira. It happened! It wasn't just a dream of yours. My theory of why I didn't recall anything about memory loss-reversing potion until now and why your memories are incomplete is that it might be related to my depression and the stress you suffered as a result."

"I—I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at, Nardho."

"Our memories, maybe even all of our friends' memories too, are psychologically repressed. In your case, the repression is the greatest. You associate our younger years with me being depressed as hell and, knowing you, it is reasonable to extrapolate that your mind is protecting you by refusing to remember all the years in which my severe depression was at its peak. My depression does extend into our marriage as it never truly goes away, only managed through antidepressants and therapies, so maybe you're subconsciously in denial about ever being there to support me through my mental health challenges." I took her hand into mine. "I'm very sorry my depression robs you of your memories, my love. That's the last thing I would ever want. But now we know and we can undo all the mess we created in the process. Moira, do you trust me enough to stay with me? I can't promise my depression will heal, but I'm willing to try."

"Have I ever not trusted you, Nardho?" Moira squeezed my hand hard. "I will always trust you."