Y/N, Klein, and Sugu had left the Sitri Manor, saying their goodbyes and heading to a large dungeon. They were to meet up with Lisbeth, Agil, Asuna, and Sinon.

As they walked to the meeting area, Y/N thought about the sadness he had endured over the years. First it was his friends in the Holy Sword Project. Then it was some of the friends he had made during his time as a mercenary. The amount of blood that was shed during those missions. Those days. Those memories always...somehow...came back to haunt him.

Before-3 Years Prior

Y/N was about fifteen when he met this mercenary guild. They called themselves the Moonlit Black Cats. They were a small organization. Turns out, they were just a band of friends, about five of them.

They were Angels to be exact. They hoped to make a big name for themselves, but at the same time, just have a larger family. When Y/N met them, it was saving them from a group of monsters, he tried to distance them as far as possible. After what happened when he escaped that wretched place, he feared that if he ever met people and had friends again, he would lose them. He tried to make friends in his second contract, which was to take down a high-leveled monster in a dungeon raid, the people called him a "beater" due to his superior skills.

To them, Y/N's power was great. Godly even. It was as if God had blessed them with his power. Anyone would want it. To Y/N, it was nothing more than a curse. He despised it actually. He rather have a simple life. Living in a log cabin by a lake. Perhaps have a family of his own, teaching his children how to fish. But. fate had other plans for him. His power was built off the blood lust, the revenge, the grudge he held since that day. If anything, Y/N would rather give up his power.

Over time, as he helped the small guild, he started to build a friendship with them. They gave him a sense of relief, a home-like atmosphere...happiness.

Little did Y/N know, meeting them was a big mistake.

Y/N and the small guild had traveled to a small dungeon. The leader went off to buy a building so it could serve as a guild house. The others decided to raid a dungeon in celebration of their leader buying a house. One of them found a secret door and found a chest. Upon opening the chest, hordes of monsters spawned, killing them except for Y/N. He promised to protect them. When he went to tell the guild leader of their deaths, he went back to the guild house the very next day to find the leader's body hanging by a rope that was connected to the ceiling. He took his own life to join his friends in the afterlife. Since then, Y/N held the guilt of their deaths on his shoulders.

Present

Y/N was shaken from his thoughts as Sugu had flicked his forehead.

Y/N: Ow! What was that for?

Sugu: You were spacing out. Klein had been calling your name for ten minutes straight.

Klein: Are you alright man?

Y/N didn't want to trouble them of his terrible memories. He never even told his mother. He just didn't want to burden them with his suffering.

He puts on a fake smile, but Klein and Sugu felt like it wasn't sincere.

Y/N: Don't worry. I'm fine. Come on, let's go on and catch up to them. Their probably already clearing out the floors, waiting on our asses.

Y/N goes on forward, but the other two had puzzled looks on their face. Sugu recalled, Y/N never really withheld information like that. She knew there was something he wasn't telling them.

They shook it off for now and went to catch up with Y/N.

Timeskip-Floor Ten

The group had met up with the others they were meeting up with and had cleared all the way to floor ten, below the Sitri domain. Klein noticed that Y/N was exerting more strength than usual. In the first twenty or less, Y/N doesn't go all out. Sure Y/N knows that one mistake could very well cost his life, but it was still too early to show that much power.

As they traveled, Lisbeth had decided to strike up some conversation. Just walking to the next floor was already boring when the only thing you could hear was the sounds of armor and the weapons clanking along with the sounds of your feet hitting the floor every time you walk.

Lisbeth: So Sugu, what kind of stuff did you do in Yggdrasil? Anything interesting?

Suguha: Not really. Met a nice fairy up there. Apparently my affinity to wind magic that allowed me to fly had granted me a name. They called me "Speedaholic."

Asuna: Why is that?

Suguha: I'm able to fly faster than most of the fairies there. That's how I earned my nickname. At least it's not as lame as sir edge lord over there.

Y/N: I am not an edge lord...

Sinon: The black clothes and the cold attitude begs to differ.

Y/N: (sigh) Sometimes I wonder, why do I even bother with you guys?

Lisbeth: Because we're all friends here! Now let's pick up the pace!

They picked up the pace and they soon encountered large double doors. This signified the boss room as they called it. The dungeon boss was called, Kagachi the Samurai Lord. As it sounds, the monster was a samurai. A demon.

Noises of battle could already be heard inside so the group rushed towards the gate. They opened to see a small guild was taking it on. Looking at their equipment, their armor and weapons weren't suited for the fight. In fact, the conditions of the equipment were worn and haven't been repaired or renewed at all. Unlike this group, Y/N's group had repaired, sharpened and performed maintenance on their weapons and armor.

Y/N was about to draw his sword until he freezes. His eyes widen. He didn't like what he was seeing. It was the bloodied and dismembered bodies of the small guild that he once fought with back then. The first one was the girl in the group, Sachi. She raised her head and her eyes were blood red and she faced the black haired boy.

Sachi: You couldn't protect me...you lied to me!

For the first time in years since that day, Y/N was scared. He felt so much guilt building up on him and he wanted it to end. 

He stood there and he didn't even his realize his allies were calling out to him. His comrades were helping the small guild out while Y/N himself just stood there and did nothing. No one realized he was petrified with fear.

Y/N then started to see something else. He was now in an area with floating platforms. He remembered this area. He remembered that there was a murderous guild that went around killing random people. Laughing Coffin. Someone could easily identify them by looking for a brand. A specific one. Showing the brand of a face that seems to laughing and has a sadistic smile and that face rested upon on a black tattoo of a coffin.

This area he was in was the day him, Klein, Asuna, and multiple other guilds came to stop this murdering clan, but somehow information on their ambush was leaked so instead they were ambushed by Laughing Coffin members. They jumped down from the platforms they were hiding upon and an all out blood bath had broken out. Bloodshed was everywhere. Blades clashing, the screams of people, the laughs and the cackles of the Laughing Coffin members. They were toxic, poison to Y/N's ears. He didn't want to listen to them anymore.

He was finally shaken out of his thoughts as he realized that his friends were already tackling the monster. He drew the Blue Rose Sword, raising it high into the air before bringing the tip down into the ground, embedding it.

Y/N: Enhance Armament!

The blue magic circle appears under him and ice appears, making its way to the demon samurai.

Y/N: Release Recollection!

Then blue ice vines start to form and wrap around the demon samurai, draining the life force away as blue ice roses start to appear on the vines. Y/N then draws the Night Sky Sword and it glows blue, him preparing to do the Sword Skill {Eclipse}.

The demon then raises it's giant katana, doing an overhead strike. Y/N blocks the attack with the defensive skill {Cross Block}. He then follows up with the dual wield skill {End Revolver}, swinging his right sword in a full circle slash then doing a sideways slash with the left sword. Then using his right sword, he uses the skill {Howling Octave}, a five high-speed continuous thrust with his sword, followed by a cut upward then downward with the final hit being a full force swing from a overhead position. There was a long delay so the demon samurai was able to use it's left leg, kicking Y/N in the stomach and sending him rolling before crashing into a pillar.

Klein then recovers and uses his katana skill {Zekku}. Agil was in the air and grasped his two-handed axe and spins, using the skill {Whirlwind}. Sinon had hung back, in the air with Hecate in her hands. Pulling the trigger, sending out bullets as she pulls the chamber to empty out the bullet casing for each shot she takes. Y/N gets up and uses the skill {Rage Spike}, dashing forward and thrusting up.

Using Skill Connect, in his left hand he uses the Sword Skill {Horizontal Square}, leaving a rhombus trail after the skill finished. He switches with Asuna and the Lightning Flash uses the rapier skill {Linear}, running at high speeds and delivering a single thrust strike. Using the Skill Connect technique that she learned from Y/N a few months back, she follows up with the skill {Quadruple Pain}, thrusting four powerful strikes. Lisbeth then comes from above and runs elemental magic into her mace, using lightning and strikes from above. Sugu then comes in and leaps into the air, using the Sword Skill {Sonic Leap}. Moving at high speed, she brings her sword down and slashes the demon samurai. She then follows up with the skill {Snake Bite}, slashing from left to right then right to left. Then with the last hit, Y/N runs and does the skill he was most known for, {Vorpal Strike}.

The dungeon boss was killed and it explodes into blue like crystals. The smaller guild celebrates while Y/N only looks down. His comrades notice this and they knew something was wrong with him. They didn't want to ask now as it wasn't the time and they would ask later. Unknown to them, Y/N was shedding tears. He had lost so many people he considered allies to dungeons like these. He also killed when he didn't want to. He didn't want to murder those in the raid against Laughing Coffin, but they forced his hand to do so. The only time he wanted to kill was the ones who were responsible and who helped in the Holy Sword Project.

They left the dungeon and Y/N confined himself to his room, and silently cried. When they all came in, Klein, Sugu and Y/N, Y/N just immediately went back to his room. Sugu and Klein were concerned. Even Serafall was concerned. When coming back on a contract like this, Y/N would say his greetings and they would all meet in the dining room.

With Suguha and Klein

Klein and Sugu had went into the dining room and noticed that Sona's peerage was there, but not Lord and Lady Sitri.

Klein: Eh? Where's Lord and Lady Sitri?

Sona: Mother and father went out on their own little date night.

Tsubaki: Where is Lady Serafall and Y/N? It's dinner time.

Klein and Sugu look at each other, not knowing how to answer them. Sona notice their looks and was confused, tilting her head as she does so.

Sona: Is something wrong?

Klein: Well...

Sugu: Nii-chan is just not feeling that well so he told us to go on and eat.

Klein: Yeah! What she said!

Sona wasn't sure to believe this or not. She had her suspicious but she decided to let the matter go.

Sona: Alright then. You better go eat now. The food is starting to get cold.

Klein and Sugu nod, heading to their seats and settling down.

With Serafall

The Leviathan was quite puzzled. Her son had completely ignored her. Not even acknowledging her presence as soon as he stepped in. He just went to his room and closed the door.

She was confused as to why as she caught a glimpse of his face. He was saddened at least. His eyes were dull and he had no emotion himself. She wanted to know what was wrong so she went down to his room, knocking on his door.

Serafall: Y/N? Is something wrong?

There was no answer. She tried turning the door bell, but it was locked. Y/N never locked his door. She quickly got the master key for the house and unlocked it. She opened the door and saw that her son had been weeping. His tears streaming down his face.

She quickly opens the door and hugs him, comforting her son.

Serafall: Y/N baby, what's wrong?

Y/N wraps his arms around her waist and starts to weep into her clothes. His mother wasn't bothered by it as she was doing her best to console her son.

Y/N: Kaa-san...I'm a failure.

Serafall: Don't say that. You never were.

Y/N: I let people die because I was too weak! I let them die...

The Leviathan watched, hugging him tightly still as he let out his cries. The pain he had endured. The memories that he kept up and tried to forget had caught up to him. And now they were haunting him.

The older Sitri strokes her son's hair and rubs his back, giving a mother's love.

Serafall: There there my child. There is no need to cry.

Y/N: I let them--

Serafall: Shhh...just go to sleep my child.

Serafall then starts to hum a tune. The black haired boy starts to grow tired, slowly closing his eyes.

Minutes later, light snoring was heard. Serafall lays her son down on his bed and pulls the covers up to his neck. She kisses his forehead and then on his cheek. 

She rests her hand on his cheek, then moving it up to his hair and strokes it a bit more.

Serafall: Just rest now my son. You earned it.

She walks out of the room and glances back at her child. She did her best to console him and hoped it was enough. He had been fighting for years, trying to forget the terrors, the terrible memories.

She closes the door. Droplets of water were then on the floor as the Leviathan herself was letting her tears out as well.

Serafall: What can I do to help you?

She then walks off to her office and thought about what she could do to help him. What could she do?

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did you cry? I cried a little. Anyway, hope you all enjoyed the chapter! As always, I appreciate the support on my books that you show me because it motivates me as a writer! Let's keep this road going shall we? Stay safe out there.

-okami.

(P.S). What did you all think of Sword Art Online: Progressive? I saw the trailer yesterday and I don't know what to feel. Alicization was pretty good, but I didn't really like the first season. The second season was okay, but the first season had plot points that didn't make sense. Just want to know your thoughts on the SAO anime that's going to come soon.