1:19 Pm

I guess I should start by introducing myself, and other people you might hear a lot about throughout.. whatever this is. My name is Mickie Mae Andrews, but people often give me random nicknames, like Mimi, or Mae-Mae. That's what everyone used to call my grandma, Mae-Mae. Anyways, I am fifteen years old, and I was born in an amazing suburb far away from the rundown town I live in now. I live with my mom and younger brother Ty. I have two other brothers and an older sister but they live elsewhere.

Lauren Baldwin,Best friend Basically sister and apart of the "Jubilee Family"

Gabriel(Gabe) Caliente - Boyfriend

Alyssa Denver- Best friend and apart of the "Jubilee Family"

Maya Calico - Member of the "Jubilee Family"

Hazel Ferguson- Best friend and apart of the "Jubilee Family"

Serenity Naistus - Stoner, Semi-Teen Alcoholic, Former Bully, Former Best friend, Former Jubilee Member,

Dad- Alcoholic

Old Norma - Realtor and Land Lord

Candy- Aunt, One of Mom's Best friends

Justin Holt - Ex boyfriend, and now friend.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

8:59 PM

Before I begin with... everything, I might as well catch you up on some recent events that have been occurring.. Think of it as the "Last Time On..." part of a show you see before every single episode.

I've been thinking a lot about what happened to me over the summer lately.. I think all the trauma is coming back to me. I've heard that happens sometimes. I haven't really told anyone about what happened to me, especially not the details. The only people who know are Alyssa, Lauren , Serenity, Jana and Gabe. Thinking about what happened tears me apart, makes me feel worthless and scared. Honestly I am scared all the time.. I don't know how to prevent myself from it.Usually the only solution is Gabriel, he makes me feel safe, most of the time. There was that "one" time that he caused me to panic. No means no, it does not mean push me until I break. It was the weirdest feeling, I was scared, scared of the one person I love more than anything in the world. It still makes me sick to my stomach to think about. Anyways I don;t think you are ready for that story quite yet. How about we move onto something else that has been happening in my head lately..... The Dreams.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Whenever I visit my dads house I have odd dreams but just this last time I visited the dreams became more intense, almost like they were more real and being my superficial self, I just HAD to have an explanation, we will get to that part later. Now... Dream number one occurred the very first night I got back to my dads house. 

Dream 1 - The Creepy Old Man Who.... Wait, What?

The man had the darkest hair I had ever seen. To match it was his pedophile like mustache that rested quite guiltily above his thin lips, under his huge, sniper like nostrils. Yet somehow, I loved him, more then I loved my spiky haired, dark eyed boy. Maybe it was how manly he was... but it was wrong, Nicholas was 31, I was only 15.. Still, that didn't stop me. I met Nicholas every night for a week, behind Gabriel's back, It was our little secret. We would do things, bad things.. and, I enjoyed it.. The feeling of it.. everything. I loved him, I loved him more than anything and anyone, he was my guilty pleasure....

Finally, I decided to tell Gabriel, I couldn't keep hurting him, I knew this was all wrong, I love Gabriel and that is who I should be with.. No matter how much I hurt Nicholas, and no matter how much I hurt myself from doing this, I know its right, and I know that one day, it will be like Nicholas never even existed. Just me and Gabe forever, like it should be.

I walked away from Nicholas after breaking up with him in pieces, I felt like a part of me was ripped out of my chest and stomped into the ground, much like the way you would smooth a little bug on the sidewalk.

A week after I ended things with Nicholas I began getting weird messages, Nick was sad, he was threatening himself, putting me on the guilt trip... but this Nicholas wasn't the dark haired man I remembered, he was young, he was my age, he had the brightest blue eyes and obnoxious lips that took up too much of his face. But... despite his not so pleasant looks, I needed to be with him.. I could not have his blood on my hands.... *End Dream*

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Disturbing, indeed, but way less graphic then I had too witness in my real dream.. or, how about nightmare, Moving on...

Dream 2 - The Death Of A Love Brings A Love Back To Life

It was mid July (or so I am assuming), anyways, I was sitting in the passengers side of Gabe's white range rover, we were driving down a dark highway with no one on the road but us. Our after grad vacation was amazing, just the two of us, camping. It was all I could ever ask for, and now we were on our way home ready to sta---------

I could hear a faint sob, it grew louder as my vision came back to me, I was in a hospital. It took me a second but realized the sob was coming from my mom, naturally I got up to hug her, I pushed and pushed but couldn't moved. I was strapped down to the hospital bed.. "Honey?? Your'e okay!! Trevor get in her, She's awake!" The rest of my family came running into the room one by one, all my brothers, my grandparents cousins.

"W-w-what happened..?" I finally spoke and the room went silent, my mom grabbed my hand, and as she told me what happened, my memory came back, bit by bit. Gabriel and I were listening to our favorite Beyonce song, dancing and singing our hearts out, there was a semi... Gabriel jumped on top of me and kissed my forehead quickly before shielding my face with his arms.. That would be the last time I would ever feel his arm around mine, the last time I would feel hi lips press against my skin... The last of Gabriel Caliente I would ever see.

(Ten Years Later)

I walked up the steps of Harvard University thinking of him, how proud he would have been of me for making it this far.. My first class was full of strangers, strangers who seem to know everyone but me very well. "It's okay" I thought "It will all be over soon". Half way into the class are started hallucinating, I kept seeing Gabriel in one of the first five rows of the classroom. Writing pretty much everything the professor said down in his super organized notebook. I rubbed my eyes over and over until finally I stopped seeing Gabe, buttt the hallucinations didn't stop, because now I was seeing Justin, Justin Holt. My ex, even though I wouldn't really call it that since we only dated for three month in the sixth grade. I rubbed my eyes again hoping the hallucinations would stop, but, it turns out I wasn't hallucinating, there he was, Justin Holt.. I talked to him after class and we ended up going for coffee together. We ordered the same things we had been ordering since middle school. After months of coffee and class it wasn't just me anymore. It was Justin and I, we were happy, we would spend our days cuddled up on the couch enjoying every second we spent together, or so we thought.

We both knew I wasn't over Gabriel, as well as we both knew I probably never would be. As much as I loved Justin, he wasn't Gabriel, I felt weird in his arms, and every kiss just made me miss Gabe everyday, more and more.... Justin and I learned to get over it.... we learned to love one another throughout it all, marriage, children (four to be exact), careers, arguments and especially Gabe.... and even though it was hard without Gabe, I had Justin, I have always had Justin, even when Gabriel was by my side. *End Of Dream*

This dream made it hard to see Justin for a few days... especially since that night he dreamed the same thing... Was it fate? Was it a sign? No one really knows the answer too that.. sooo I guess I will wait and see.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------*Present Time*

11:59 PM

Gabriel wasn't at school today, he said he was "Sick".. It's okay though, I needed time to focus on my work anyway.. I keep thinking about my dream, with Justin. It makes me wonder what could've been, and how my life would have changed if I didn't decide that I needed a "fresh start" for junior high. I tried to distance myself from him at school but for some reason he kept coming back, over and over. Don't get me wrong, I always love having him as company, since he really does understand me perfectly... but, I needed to focus on other things. And I really don't think it was necessary for him to follow me to lunchtime detention when he has never ever handed in an assignment late before, was he just bored or.. could it have been the dream that sparked his sudden interest in my life...

I need to get my mind of this...

(There are a couple chapters later on where the focus isn't really on the dreams.. but it doesn't last long so PLEASE just stick around and be patient.. the dreams are definitely vital to this story and the storyline will continue properly)

------- Descriptions Of The Peopleee ----------

Mickie Mae Andrews

Lauren Baldwin

Gabriel Caliente

Alyssa Denver

Maya Calico

Hazel Ferguson

Serenity Naistus

Justin Holt