Asher

Inhaling deeply, I draw in Emma's sweet scent. Even after all these years, she still carries that same intoxicating fragrance that I find impossible to resist.

Out of all the scenarios I had envisioned for tonight, finding myself in Emma's bed with her wrapped around me was definitely unexpected.

Not that I'm complaining or anything.

"I had no idea you were coming back," Emma says, her voice a hushed murmur. "In my mind, you'd be away forever."

"Right after I left, I was so... lost, you know?" I whisper. "Dad had just passed away, and you and I had that big fight a week before I left. Do you remember that?"

"We were so young..." She lets out a long, regretful sigh. "And I was too afraid to stand up to my father."

"God, I felt so guilty for leaving, but I was also so angry that you wanted a break." I close my eyes, feeling the weight of my regret as I reflect on how my emotions had distorted my judgment. Back then, I had convinced myself that she was better off with Max; that I didn't belong here. Somehow, it made it easier for me to leave.

"I didn't know what to do." She releases a shuddering breath. "When you said you wanted to leave everything behind, I panicked."

"I shouldn't have left the way I did." I turn to face her, adjusting our bodies so we're facing each other.

"I want to make this work between us," she says, her voice laced with sincerity. "But I won't lie and say that seeing you again didn't hurt. So much has happened after you left, and I just—"

"Just?"

"I miss our friendship." She gives me a small smile. "We were good friends once, Ash."

"You keep saying that..." I cup her jaw, searching her eyes. "That you want us to be friends."

"You don't want that?" She frowns, and a soft chuckle escapes me. I know that, in theory, she's right, but the truth is that I have no idea how to do that. No matter how hard I try, I can't see her as just a friend. She means too much more to me.

"Our little rule book doesn't allow me to say what I really want." I take a deep breath as my hands slide down her neck, feeling the tension in her muscles melt away.

"Ash..." she says with a hint of annoyance, but I can tell by the subtle changes in her breathing and the blush that has spread across her face that she is not as unaffected as she wants me to believe.

"I wish I could go back in time," I murmur, pulling her close so our noses are almost touching. "I wish things were simpler."

"I know the feeling." She smiles, her palms pressing against my chest.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Would you have married Max if he was the one in need of a wife right now?" My heart pounds hard against my ribcage as I ask her the question that has consumed me since we got entangled in this deal.

"Ash..." She tries to move away, but my hand on the nape keeps her in place, my touch gentle but firm as I make her look at me.

"I didn't marry him back then when our fathers pushed us to be together..." She holds my gaze. "Why would I marry him now?"

"Things are different now..." I say, noticing my chest feels ten thousand times lighter now.

"You told me you left because you thought I'd be happier with Max." She scoffs. "I can't believe you're still jealous of him."

"You want to open the door to the past, Em." I let go of her, turning my body so I'm lying on my back. "Well, the truth is that I never felt good enough. Dad kept saying I was wasting my life with photography and painting... And damn it, you deserved more than I had to offer you back then."

"Ash." She touches my cheek, and I turn my head to her. 

"When they all mentioned you and Max getting married, I went crazy, Em." I shake my head, my eyes closing for a second as I remember how desperate I felt.

"How could you think I would've married him?" She frowns. "We had just slept together... God, I was in love with you, Ash."

"Jesus, Emma." I sit up straight, her words hitting me like a punch to the gut. "I asked you to come with me? You hated it here, too. You..."

"I told you I was not ready to leave..." she whispers, her voice catching in her throat.

Turning my attention to her, my heart breaks all over again when I see she's crying. "Fuck!" I pull her to me, sighing in relief when she sits up and wraps her arms around me.

"You left me..." she cries softly, her words feeling like a sharp blade around my side.

"Jesus..." I hold her tighter. "I was so lost after my dad died. I know it's not an excuse, but—"

"You were grieving." She presses her hand to my chest, putting some distance between us. "I get it now."

"I hated leaving you behind." I cup her face. "But being here was killing me."

"I know." She looks down, and something in me breaks.

"I'm sorry." I swallow, feeling my eyes burn. "I'm so sorry, Em."

"Me too," she whispers. 

Before I know it, she climbs onto my lap, her body fitting perfectly against mine. I have no idea if we'll ever be able to go back to the simple life we had before everything turned south.

Something in me tells me it's impossible to fix a broken vase.

It's the same voice that keeps telling me I'll fail Max, my late father, and the legacy they worked hard to keep.

It's the voice that once told me I had nothing to offer her. That I was a loser who would end up breaking her heart.

I don't know anything anymore.

All I know is that I'm here now. That Emma and I are here now.

The weight of our resentment and regret is heavy, but nothing can make me release her from my grasp. Our emotions might be complicated, but our connection is still here.

"Ash..." Her eyes drop to my mouth and her lips part. With her hands on my face, I feel her longing and the array of conflicted emotions in her eyes.

I'm dying to kiss her.

To make her mine again.

But I promised her I wouldn't push her, so she needs to take the first step.

"I'm here, Em." I grip her waist, pulling her closer so there's no space between us.

The air is thick with tension and anticipation as I wait for her to take the lead. I can see the fight in her eyes as if she's deciding what to do. She knows there's no going back to us if she kisses me right now. No way, we'll ever be just friends again if we cross this line.

It's up to her now to make the next move now.

With our gazes locked, she bites her lower lip, and everything in me tightens. In an instant, I'm hard. I'm hurting. I'm crazy with the need for this woman.

Leaning in slowly, I give her a moment to stop me; to pull away if she wants.

But she doesn't.

Her lips meet mine in a hesitant, searching kiss as if she's testing the waters. There's a hint of familiarity in her touch, but there's also something new, something different, something unspoken.

Cupping her nape with one hand and her waist with another, I break the kiss and hold her gaze. I'd give anything to know what is going on in her mind. But the way she's looking at me refrains me from asking.

"Ash," she whispers, grabbing my shirt and pulling me to her.

"I missed you so much," I whisper, my voice raw with emotion.

Her sweet smile knocks the wind out of me.

"Kiss me..." she says, and I search her eyes, needing to know we're on the same page.

"Are you sure?" I ask, and she nods, her eyes shining with emotion.

Sliding my hand up her back, I brush my lips along her jawline and down her neck, igniting a trail of goosebumps in their wake. Her breath is hot against my skin, and I can't help but let out a low, appreciative moan.

"I love how good you smell..." I kiss the sweet spot behind her ear, and she lets out a soft muffled moan that goes straight to my cock.

"Ash..."

"Do you know how many times I dreamed about us?" I bite her earlobe. "How many times I woke up hard because I dreamed about you the entire night?"

"God..." She moans louder this time, her fingers tangling in my hair and pulling it hard.

There she is.

My Emma.

Sliding my hand down her t-shirt, I bury my face in her neck, sucking hard. She lets out a loud moan and I swear I've never been harder in my life. Before I know it, she's pulling her T-shirt over her head.

Fuck.

My jaw falls open when I see she's not wearing a bra.

Swallowing, I'm not ashamed to say I take my time before I bring my eyes back to her. But when I do, I know she will always be the best decision in my life.

Our lips crash together once more, and the world outside fades away. It's just her and me, drowning in a sea of pent-up desire and years of longing. Our kisses deepen, becoming more urgent as if trying to make up for all the lost time.

Jesus... We have a long journey ahead of us, full of challenges and obstacles. So much time has passed. There's so much history and uncertainties hovering over us now. As much as I wish to rewind the clock, we have evolved from those kids we were when we first got together.

We're two different people now who will need to get to know each other all over again.

But tonight, we have this.

Tonight, it's just us, like we used to be.

_____

A/N: *sighs* First kisses are the best, right?

Please remember to vote and follow me here CelesteABrook  for news and updates. This is just the beginning of Emma & Asher's night. 

XOXO

Celeste