Alison's POV.

Fear.

It is all what I feel as I plough trough the week, body tensed in caution and eyes flickering at every person who passes me by.

Jacob remained silent after our meet, Elizabeth deeply disappointed after I had entered the house thoroughly disturbed and scarce from the lovesick eyes she had predicted to be plastered over my expression.

After countless nagging she had given up from questioning me for what exactly had stirred such a negative reaction from the date, lurking quietly as she rubs my back in comfort.

Guilt had dug at my gut the entire week, thoughts of if I hadn't done what I had done would our marriage have turned out alright?

Had he seen what I had done?

Had that influenced his behaviour?

Blake had returned to his gloomy, depressed self, rarely appearing from his dingy office and never speaking unless asked a question.

Concern for the man had forced me to refrain openly glaring at him whenever our eyes met, instead turning away immediately as indifferently as possible.

Even Luke's gentle smile the next morning did little to cheer me up, the girl who he had recently began to see, safely wrapped in his arms.

The two of us are on break, Elizabeth dragging me to a nearby cafe, claiming that I needed to get out more often instead of the usual return and retreat from the  restaurant.

"I swear to God, you're getting paler everyday I see you!"Elizabeth huffs, red nails twirling the pink and white stripped straw delicately.

I roll my eyes, drawing my own chocolate milkshake towards me. My eyes flicker towards the door, the bell ringing above them as a couple enters, wide smiles painted on each their lips.

They look content. Satisfied.

They're simple people. Living an ordinary life. But to themselves they are living a dream, in the other's arms. Together.

I yearn for the love they feel, fingers falling limp at my lap as I struggle to draw my eyes away from the lovesick couple.

"You okay?"

It's Elizabeth gentle voice that pulls me away from any hopeless wishes, her brown orbs full of concern.

I smile lightly, nodding as I lean backwards in my seat. She's not stupid though. She knows that I'm lying. That I'm hiding my frown.

"Is someone threatening you?"she asks hesitantly.

My back tenses as I straighten in my seat, fixing the grim before me with a stern gaze, "Why would you think that?"

She shifts in the white, plastic chair, an uncomfortable smile playing on her lips, "I don't know. You just seem really fidgety these days, and you keep glancing at the door whenever someone comes in."

I throw her a careless smile, draping a lazy arm over my chair, "It's all good."

She purses her lips but allows the lie to slide. Guilt strums at my gut, knowing that my friend was merely trying to look out for me while I continuously pushed her away.

The crestfallen expression on her face is enough to have me sigh, lowering my arms on the grimy, plastic table, explanations erupting from my lips.

"The guy from the date."I begin, pushing my hair from my face as Elizabeth straightens in her seat, smiling steadily, "I knew him."

She nods, a faint smile lining her lips, "Thought so."

"You knew?"

"You seemed shocked when I opened the door. Connected the dots to know that you obviously knew the dude."

I nod, hands writhing in my lap.

She tilts her head, eyebrows pinching together, "Who was he though?"

"Blake's cousin."

She raises an eyebrow, "Name?"

"Jacob Andrews."

"Sounds familiar. Dad doesn't really mention Blake's mother's nephews. Or her at all. But yeah, continue."

"When I first met Blake I thought he was a dick. I mean the guy had no manners at all."

She snorts, rolling her eyes, "Rings a bell."

"And I was dating a guy before I actually met him. Dad didn't like him at all, guess that's why he set me up with Blake in hope that I'll dump him. Thing is that I didn't."

Comprehension clouds in her dark orbs, but she doesn't speak, lips pursed in distaste.

"I continued to see him even after Blake and I got married. I believed that I loved him and forced myself to stay with him. It was stupid and foolish. Ended up ruining my marriage."I spit darkly.

"Blake found out?"she asks hesitantly.

"I think so. That's what Jacob said when he dropped me off and I feel so guilty knowing that could've hurt Blake and possibly been why he treated me like shit. I broke it off with him a few weeks after our marriage really began to flow, when I really began to feel something for Blake."

Disappointment is evident in her expression as she rests against her seat, lips curved downwards.

"So."she drawls, lips curled into a displeased frown, "You've been blaming Blake for something that you've done too?"

I wince, the accusing tone of her voice slapping hard against my cheek. Guilt squirms at my stomach, as I shift uncomfortably in my seat, ignoring her narrowed gaze.

A sigh tumbles from her lips as she slumps against her seat, slender fingers reaching to her forehead, drawing gentle circles.

"I didn't that this could get even more fucked up than it already is."

She doesn't seem mad nor disappointed. In fact, she looked rather amused, lips curved up lightly and fingers tapping against the white of the table.

"You're not pissed?"I say, eyes watching her cautiously.

She laughs, shaking her head, " 'Course not. He did worse shit, but that doesn't make what you did right."

Relief spreads against my chest as I throw her a thankful smile which she returns with enthusiasm.

"But."she adds, raising a finger in the air to silence me as I open my mouth, "It does mean that you have some apologising to do."

I gape at my friend across me, allowing her words to process in my mind before throwing her disbelieving look, a scoff falling from my lips, "I am not apologising to that piece of shit!"

She rolls her eyes, leaning on her elbows, "Shove away that pride for a second, will you Williams?"

"It's not pride. It's the absolute absurdity to apologise to someone who had more than one chance to patch shit up!"

"Shit that started from you giving him the wrong signals."she slides in, a flicker of anger dancing in her eyes.

"What wrong signals?"I cry out, throwing my hands in exasperation, "I made it so fucking obvious that I loved him that I even let him treat me like his fucking dog."

We are earning curious glances from people near now, who are watching us intently, not bothering to hide their rather obvious eyes.

"And maybe he treated you like his bitch for a reason."she shrugs, seeming unfazed at my outburst.

Her relaxed demeanour to my bristled one sets me off as I emit a low growl, "For what? What the fuck did I do to him?"

A lazy smile drapes against her lips, hooded eyes that express outmost boredom meets mine, "You saw another man while you were married."

"He did too!"I exclaim, almost childishly.

"I know. But wonder why he chose to cheat on you?"

I don't reply, only settling down with a heated glare, fists clenched tightly at my sides.

"Alright, imagine this. Your dad pairs you up with this dude you've never really met before and you seriously don't want to settle down with someone you have no idea about, so your pretty harsh to this dude, even if he's not at fault."

"Thing is that you find out that this dude is actually dating this chick while he's married to you. And obviously you're gonna get pissed because you've sucked it up and stayed loyal to this dude while he's out with some girl."

"Now tell me Ali, would you treat that dude with respect after seeing that. Would you stay loyal and be a single girl just for the sake of a marriage that definitely wasn't going anywhere?"

It's true.

I wouldn't.

But never would I present any human with such cruel words. Never would I dare apply such harshness on both men or women.

"No."