The feeling of rejection is not the worse, whats worse is that they pretend they love you back but in the end, they don't

~Queen

_=_=_

IQRA

"De dih, De dih, Dil cheez tujhe dedi!! 

Adae Wallah Wallah

Badi hi hasiee hai tu 

Bar bar uss neh tujhe dekha- 

Dil dedih 

Dedih 

Dil chiz tujhe dedih- 

bhai neh dil tujhe dedih haan dedihh!!" 

we were singing that on top of our voices back home when Ruqayyah bhabhi and bhai called 

"Oh my Allah, I will not, ever video call you people!!" whined Ruqayyah as she set straight 

"Oh and why is that?" asked Riza aunt and Ruqayyah chuckled

"Because you all begin singing!" she said 

Apparently Riza aunt, Daadi mah, Huma didi and I had answered her video call in the high class-called-something-i-forgot and had a hd video chat 

her hair was messed up and she did look flushed, but pretty Masha Allah 

"Where is bhai by the way?" i asked and she laughed out loud 

"He is out playing with Zahi and Zaik-" she said and tapped in her phone 

"I am sending the pics- check it out-" she said and my phone vibrated 

"We will see it later-" said aunt and daadi mah together 

we looked at each other and laughed 

"Okay okay wait- Hows Fatima?" asked daadi and Ruqayyah smiled 

"She is good, Alhamdulillah- currently all are out with Iqraam and the kids to the park at the other side of this resort-" she said and I nodded

I missed bhai 

"Okay, you all chat, Riza, come with me, we need to finish making the 'Itali Dosaa'" said daadi mah and then they left 

"So where is....... Shumayll?" drawled bhabhi and i knew where this was going 

"dead" i muttered but immediately regretted because mom says that you don't know when your words come true 

'Astagfirullah" I muttered under my breath 

"Uhuh- say it- say it a 100 times for his safety- after all you are concerned!" winked Ruqayyah bhabhi and I growled 

I.Dont.Like.Mohammed.Shumayll.Istiaq.Edris!

"No I don't want to! we fight all the time! Plus i got a scolding at work due to him today!" i said and looked down 

I hated being scowled at 

"Awww- was he calling you or sending you lovey dovey messages?" winked Huma didi and bhabhi laughed 

I playfully slapped her hand 

"yeah and i am married to Batman!" i said and they began laughing 

Huma didi's phone beeped indicating a message

"Shumayll messaged-" she said in a playful tone, holding up her phone 

"Its a video message- lets see what he has to say-" said Ruqayyah bhabhi leaning into the camera 

bhabhi positioned the portable webcam towards the phone and hit open 

"As salaam bhabhi- I know you are not watching this alone, most probably telling Ruqayyah bhabhi about all this so lets cut this short- tell Iqra to call me ASAP- take care-bye- Allah Hafiz" he said and the video shut off causing everyone to turn to me 

i shrugged

"You have not been answering his calls, or messages, have you?" asked Huma didi and i chuckled nervously 

"Uhh no?" i said and they laughed at me 

"Why not?" asked Huma didi and I whined like a kid 

"I don't know, I don't want to, I am sick of him and I really am tired of telling people that I don't like him! why can't they all just stop!?!" i whined and Huma didi and Ruqayyah bhabhi stopped 

"What?" i asked them and they smirked at me 

"You so like him, admit it!" they said together and I groaned 

"I don't" I muttered and sighed 

I wished that was true 

"Okay so lets get this straight- you both insanely like each other yet you cannot tell each other because......?" said Ruqayyah bhabhi and Huma didi nodded 

"Because its not right!" I said sighing hopelessly 

"Yes!!" they both squealed in unison 

"What?" I asked them irritated by their behavior 

"You did not disagree about liking each other insanely!!!" said bhabhi and didi nodded 

I groaned again when realization hit me 

great 

"You know what, I will just leave- bhabhi tell my regards to all- Allah Hafiz!" I said all in one breath before sprinting out of the room 

once in the safety of Shumayll's room, I slumped on the bed and stared at the ceiling 

"Hello Iqra!" 

I was started but it was only Stan 

"Something bothering you?" he asked me and i turned to the sides 

well, i don't know.......... what they said bothered me- did i actually like him? no 

No i didnot and there is absolutely no reasons to think otherwise 

"No- not really" I muttered as i closed my eyes 

"Iqra, remember that time when you were in the rain, back in 12th grade?" asked Stan and I radically set up 

what? 

"How did you know?" i asked him and he smiled 

"Iqra, you wore a black dress, leggings and no shoes with hijab wrapped around you- like a demon who still has the specs of an angel, the moment had stopped-" he said and my eyes widened 

what.the.hell?

"What are you speaking about?" i asked him and Stan winked 

"You see, dear Iqra, someone fell for you that day- you were 19, honey, 19 and he fell deep for you!" he said and i stared at him 

what the actual hell? 

"what? how do you know? who is he?" i asked him all at once and he smirked at me again 

"Don't you dare smirk at me, tell me!" i said hitting the wall and he changed places 

"No" he said, obviously enjoying this 

"Fine then, I will call Shumayll and tell him that you talk to me and stuff" I said menacingly 

his virtual eyes went wide and just when i thought he would give in, he shrugged 

"Go ahead, I am virtual, I can do many things!" he winked and i sighed 

of course he was made by Shumayll, he is bound to be cunning 

made by Shumayll- 

thats it! 

Turning on the AC and closing all the windows and doors, I set on the rugged floor and stared at my phone 

Call him, don't call him 

"Call him!" snorted Stan and i took a deep breath nervously 

here goes nothing 

"High time you called!" his voice rang through the speakers 

oh my Allah 

my heart did a fluttery dance 

no, thank you, i need to live, not die 

"As salamu alaikum!" i said and he replied nonchalantly 

"I needed to ask you something, thats the only reason i called-" I said and i heard him sigh 

"Just a second-" he said and sounds of doors closing came 

guess he wanted privacy?

"Yes, speak" he said and i internally groaned 

"Okay so I wanted to ask you, when i was umm....... 19, a rainy day, i was wearing black dresses and hijab with no shoes, I was dancing and having fun at the terrace alone- was someone else there?" I asked him nervously 

I can't believe i am doing this

I just told him things no one knew 

everything went silent, all I heard was his soft breathing that was rapid 

"Uh....... how would I know?" he made it sound like a question, so un- Shumayll like 

"Because Stan told me, You created Stan and you should know!" i said and he growled 

"Stan? why was he talking to you? did he tell you something else? anything?" asked Shumayll in a panicked voice and i chuckled lowly 

"No, he only told me what i asked you- tell me Shumayll, please? This is literally the first time someone ever has fallen for me, please, may i know who he was?" i asked him, literally begging, with tears in my eyes

"Oh god- are you serious Iqra?" he asked me and i sniffed 

"Yes, I want to know" I said 

this feels like teen years 

"Iqra- I- It was- I can't tell you- I am sorry- not today but some other time....... maybe when i return or something-" he said and a single tear slipped down my cheek 

"It was all a joke, wasn't it? you and Stan played me, damn it, why did i not see it!" i snapped as i wiped away the tears 

what the hell was i thinking? 

this is Shumayll we are talking about!

"Iqra listen, Iqra-" he said but I continued ranting 

"Oh right, now you will say sorry and damn everything, why did i ever think- Shumayll you really need to think things through before you speak, whatever you say can hurt other people's-" i was ranting when he yelled 

"STOP!!!" 

"God woman, do you ever just stop and listen to the other person?" he asked me and i sniffed again holding back fresh tears 

"You played with my feelings,you and S-Stan b-both-" I stammered and he sighed frustratedly 

"We did not play, Stan could not keep his mouth shut!" he snapped 

"Oh right, blame it on him, why did i ever think i could trust you- you would not know what it feels like to have someone head over heels for you because you have many girls at your feet, Shumayll, you just- j-just d-don't....." I said, slowly tears began falling down my cheeks 

"Oh damn it, I will regret this most probably but oh hell, it was me" he said and i ignored him 

regret it 

sure he will 

it was him who saw me 

wait- what? 

"WHAT?" i asked him 

"Look i have to uh go- Allah Hafiz" with that he hung up 

what the hell just happened? 

He.................... admitted he liked me.......

a week here and this happens 

what will happen in a month!?!

Oh My Allah

++++++++

Say you all love me- 

I updated twice- 

coz i wont be giving an update coming weekend and Allah knows til when coz i hav exams and my last marks were pathetic 

so yah 

but i love u all 

please pray for me 

I need to get good marks...... 

P. S Iqra and i r almost alike- when i wrote TBTN, i imagined her 2 b me- so yah 

That song above, is what Iqra n Huma were singing in their version in the starting......

anyways..... i love u all 

Allah Hafiz 

RCV 

~Queen