I Failed Him; We Failed Him
"Ah, Remus, my dear boy, what brings you here?" Dumbledore sat at his desk, a curious expression on his face.
"Did you know? Did you know he was innocent?" Remus may have seemed calm, but it was a dangerous calm, the kind that hinted at an explosion rising to the surface.
"I had my suspicions, but nothing I could prove." Dumbledore's words were measured, deliberate as if to give nothing away.
"If you knew, why did you do NOTHING as he sat in a jail cell for TWELVE YEARS?!" Remus' carefully constructed self-control was broken, and he found himself angrier than he ever could have imagined. "He was innocent, and you let him suffer. Did you know he wasn't even the secret keeper? Did you know it was Peter?"
"As I said, I had my suspicions, but nothing I could actually prove." A polite smile stayed unwavering on the old man's face.
"That's BULLSHIT! You KNEW! You knew, and you could have done something, and you did nothing. I asked you THAT NIGHT if you thought it was him, and you LIED. I trusted you, Sirius trusted you, and you let him rot in that terrible place. He'll never be the same, and it's your fault. I failed him, by listening to you. I loved him, and I failed him. And you failed all of us. You disgraced James and Lily. I can't stand to look at you anymore." Remus was red-faced as his yelling turned to an intimidatingly quiet voice.
"Remus, my boy-"
"I am NOT your boy, so stop calling me that."
"Of course, Remus, I hope you understand why I couldn't say anything. I really didn't have any way to make Wizengamot listen to a senile old man." Remus just scoffed in disgust, shaking his head at the headmaster.
"I quit." Remus turned, ready to walk out.
"Remus, wait. Would you indulge an old man and please let me speak? I never meant to allow Sirius to suffer. I honestly didn't. I knew he had no hand in betraying the Potters. That's not who he is, we both know that. But, when I went to Wizengamot, they told me I needed more evidence than just knowing him. We couldn't find Peter, and Sirius was too mad with grief to defend himself. Maybe he felt he deserved to be punished anyway. Either way, I did try, no matter what you may think." Dumbledore had begun absently stroking his beard as he spoke, a look of sadness behind his eyes.
"We still failed him, I still failed him. I should have known it wasn't him, and yet I felt I had to blame someone." Remus deflated as the anger left him, replaced by guilt and sadness.
"I think we all underestimated Peter, didn't think he was brave enough to betray James." Dumbledore was feebly attempting to comfort the other man.
"It wasn't bravery, Professor. Pete betrayed us because he was petty and power hungry. I just hope Sirius forgives me." Remus dropped his head into his hands. "I never should have thought he was the spy."
"Of course I forgive you, Remus. I forgave you immediately. I always had a soft spot for you. Now, I'd hate to see you continue to beat yourself up." Remus whipped his head up in surprise, not having realized Sirius was standing in the doorway.
"How long have you been standing there?" It came out as a whisper, as Remus was having trouble finding his voice.
"Long enough to hear you say you loved me. I hope you meant it. Did you?" Sirius began walking towards Remus.
"Of course I meant it. I loved you since we were kids. I never knew how to stop it, really." Remus was blushing, still speaking in a hushed tone.
"Good, because then I can do this." Sirius pulled Remus' face towards his own and did what he had wanted to do since he was 14. He kissed Remus John Lupin. And Remus kissed him back
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top