Hot steam blew into the air leaving a shrill noise in its wake. Knocking me out of my reverie a small squeak escaping me as I jumped away from the counter. My hand flew up to my chest as I tried to calm my heart beat, chuckling to myself. I've always been a daydreamer but recently it's gotten worse, but I didn't allow my mind to delve into why, though it wasn't something to think about. The mere thought of him made my heart drum faster, his memories brought a smile to my face, and his eyes, his silver eyes, they had me fighting to stay upright.
"Daydreaming?" A soft voice called from behind me and I peeked over my shoulder to see Maggie there smirking. This teasing was common, since the unfortunate day that Xavier had decided to kiss me in front of them all. The very thought had blood rushing to my cheeks.

The way his intense gaze had stayed on me as we walked, warm skin searing my skin from where his arm was wound around my waist, my side sometimes touching his as we walked. He'd held open the door for me his hand lingering at the small of my back as I made my way through. I'd turned towards him to bid him farewell not even catching sight of my three favourite imbeciles making their way out of the back room.

His stormy grey gaze was locked with mine as his arm coiled tighter around my waist the reluctance to let me go showing clear in his gaze. A sweet longing that melted my heart but beneath it was a hunger, a hunger that had my breath hitching in my throat as he leaned in ever so slowly. His soft plump lips crashed into mine, encapturing me completely as his other arm came around me to, yanking me into him, so close not even air could pass through us. Our lips moved together ever so softly, but so smoothly, as if made to be interlocked, his tongue darting out to lick over my bottom lip ever so gently, stealing away the very last coherent thoughts I had. My hand went up to his hair tugging the dark strands between my fingers the way I subconsciously knew he loved. The need for oxygen forgotten, we'd sunk into each other, become one, we moulded together so well I couldn't tell where he began and I ended, our frantic hearts beat against our chests. The clanging of steel falling pulled me out of my haze as I pulled away from him abruptly, ignoring the way his eyes dug into me accusingly.

Sophie, Maggie stood there gaping at us their eyes wide, Jay's jaw dropped, a coffee pot laying near his feet. My own eyes widened as I realized what they had witnessed, I'd wanted to tell them at a more appropriate time in a more appropriate way so that they wouldn't make a big deal out of it all. My heart sunk as I realized what I was going to go through. They would never shut up about it. Xavier yanked me further into him, not liking the way their stares dug into me, his whole body tensing as he sensed my discomfort. I finally looked back up at him to see him staring down at me already, silently telling me he was right there, silently comforting me.

I swallowed nervously as I looked back at those three but he gently grabbed a hold of my chin turning my face back towards him. He leaned down so that his face was level with mine, leaning closer to press his lips to mine once again in a chaste kiss his face gently nudging mine to the side so he could whisper in my ear.
"Would you like me to stay?" He asked quietly but before I could reply a loud squeal had us both turning towards the three that stood watching us.

"You guys are finally together, I knew it, I knew you would eventually see what we all saw." Maggie squealed, dragging the other two who strung along like dolls, absolutely shell shocked as she skipped ahead.
"Oh honey I'm so happy for you, why didn't you tell me?" Maggie said her beautifully aged face forming a heart melting pout.
"I-I." I start still a little wide eyed but am interrupted by Jay.
"You didn't tell me I'm your best friend, I get you didn't tell her, but why not me." Jay said gesturing to Sophie earning a hey from her in protest.

"I-I just wanted to wait so I could avoid this." I say softly, looking anywhere but them. Jay and Sophie attack me with questions that have me blushing and praying Xavier had gone momentarily deaf, though I was only half listening my eyes were on Maggie who had approached Xavier.
"I always liked you honey, I'm happy that little thing finally sees what we've been able to see for so long. I know your going to make her happy honey, I wouldn't trust anyone else with my little Raine." Maggie said softly her hands resting on Xavier's broad shoulders as he lent down so she could speak to him. A small smile coming to my face as I heard her words, only knocked out of my happy mood when Jay's words registered.
"You did sleep with him." He shrieked making my eyes widen as I slap my hand onto his annoying little fat mouth.
"What are you talking about you creep I did not sleep with him." I whisper at him frantically and the smirk in his candy apple green eyes is evident as his mouth opens and knowing what's happening next I quickly yank my hand away, the nasty little chipmunk would've licked my hand. He grins a toothy grin at me throwing his arm around my head, digging his fist into my hair and I struggled to pull away from him, scowling at him as I finally managed to.

"You're doing it again." Maggie sang breaking me out of my memory of the day she'd found out.
"I wasn't thinking about him." I lied, and Maggie's smile turned sarcastic as she nodded her head with mocking eyes.
"Yep and I'm still twenty years old riding around on a motorcycle." Maggie said making my interest peak.
"You had a motorcycle?" I ask Maggie and she nods dismissively.
"Don't change the the topic darling, I was hot that's a given but we are talking about you and your silver eyed truffle." She says making me giggle, and she rolled her eyes at my childishness, a small smile coming to her face.
"How's Xavier doing?" She asked.
"He's fine." I say trying to be nonchalant.
"After the many years you've been coming to this cafe during your family vacations with your parents, and your two years of working here all your favourite old lady gets is fine?" She asks.
"You're not old Maggie." I say trying to change the topic again.
"Not gonna work." She retorts bemused.

"He's great, I'm just slightly worried, I think he purposely doesn't go to work sometimes or leaves early when he comes to know I'm home. I feel bad what if that starts affecting his business. Then he'll hate me and he already doesn't have many reasons to love me I mean I'm me, the type to mumble to myself, and just stick to the sidelines and he's the type who whenever he goes anywhere eyes follow him and I'm so plain. He's absolutely wonderful, quiet but when he speaks he always says something that you are going to remember for years to come. Intelligent but not cocky, or flaunting, and you've seen him so you know the looks dilemma." I finish off.
"Honey you are so much more then you think you are, you're adorable and kind and so beautiful and I've always hoped someday you'd meet someone who'd show you that, and now you have him. Do me a favour Raine, take care of him, don't ever let your insecurities get between you two, that boy doesn't let people in, but you Raine, he's letting you in." She says softly and I stare at her silently for a moment before nodding. Walking away, I didn't know if it was possible anymore, if I'd be able to do it.

"I won't." I promise and she smiles walking away to tend to the mother and daughter looking at books. The sweet little girl smiled up at her beautiful mother, and my heart melted, a small sad smile coming on my face I missed my own parents. Independence was great, and one should work to achieve it but God did I miss my parents. My beautiful mom, her soft warm hugs, that lavender and honey smell that seemed to just be a part of her. The way she'd immediately know if I was upset even if I pretended otherwise.

In high school I wasn't one of the popular kids, my nerdy persona and unathletic relatively petite physique didn't make me a huge hit with my peers. I hadn't ever been bullied but never had I had friends who I truly understood or clicked with. I was a bit of a loner, sometimes choosing to spend lunches alone in the library rather than in the company of friends I had to put effort into when making conversation with. Jay and Sophie were my only two real friends, people who prioritized me, who I clicked with, who were my first choice and I theirs. My parents always encouraged me to go out more as a child but I'd rather read then spend time with people who I wasn't prioritized for and neither they for me. My parents had been there for me all through that, I couldn't be more thankful for either of them. Maggie and Cyrus were great, parental figures in the absence of my own. Perhaps the only reason my parents had let me move away for university.

The door swung open Jay and Sophie tumbled in, shaking the snow off their caps smiling sheepishly as Maggie scowled at them for all the snow they'd dragged in along with them.

"Pumpkin patch, how are you?" Jay said wrapping his arm around my neck loosely.
"Why don't you two just get a job here, you spend most of your time here anyway." I said to them although I'd never complain I loved these two despite how moronic they were, they were my morons. My brand of moron.
"Like I'd hire them." Maggie snorted as she walked by and Jay's hand flew to his throat his jaw dropping as he stared after her appalled, eliciting a small giggle from me.
"Please we are the most diligent workers out there." Sophie said swinging an arm around Jay who wrinkled his nose at her in distaste.
"You, please a sloth is more diligent then you." Jay said pushing her off him.
"Well a pigeons smarter then you." Sophie said and I looked at her in confusion since when were pigeons considered stupid.
"Thousands of them fly right into windows and die." She says and I snort unattractively my hand immediately flying up to covering my face I was a horrible person, that should not have been amusing to me at all. Jay smirked at me knowing I wanted to laugh but was trying to hold it in.

The jerk made a flying bird gesture with his two hands, letting the supposed bird fly around happily and then hitting it splat onto the glass display of bakery making me burst out in fits of laughter. I shoved my fist in front of my face but Jay pulled it away laughing.
"You don't have to be so good all the time Raine." He said
"Says Satan." I giggled making his signature appalled look reappear not helping my giggle case.

"Darling I'm an angel if you've ever seen one, not only because I have an innocent seduction but because I'm just a sweetheart." Jay says making my eyes widen as I see the face of the poor man who stands behind him looking terrified of Jay as he speaks.
"Innocent seduction you're as demonic as they come." Sophie says pushing Jay away from me.
"Stop rubbing your demonic germs all over her if silver eyes finds out he's gonna rip your tonsils out." She says and Jay's candy apple eyes widen as his hand reaches up to touch the bottom of his throat softly.
"They're higher up." I mouth to him and he nods in appreciation fixing the location of his hand.

"Okay I'm going home peasants, I have a date." He says running his tongue over his lips slowly purposely and I wrinkle my nose as Sophie pretends to gag.
"Bye pumpkins." He yells waltzing out the door happily, smiling widely at an old lady who pushes him roughly into the glass door grumbling to herself, making my eyes widen as Sophie lets out a snort. Jay freezes for a second before shrugging and carrying on his way, making his merry way to terrify the rest of the disgruntled villagers with his happiness.

"Sophie get out from behind the counter dear, it's only for employees." Maggie calls from the backroom making Sophie pout childishly as she sulkily walks to the nearest table plopping down.

My back aches by the time I get off work, as the weather grows cold more people drop by to pick up a hot beverage on their way home. As much as I adored working here it could get tiring when running around to attend to all customers.

I take out my phone to call Xavier nearly dropping the latte I'm holding when it starts buzzing itself. I pick up cheerily, it wasn't uncommon an occurrence for the ever overprotective Xavier to call right when my shift was over. My heart drops as I hear the voice on the other side.
"Raine." Jay sniffles softly over the phone.
"Jay, honey what's wrong?" I ask softly, he was supposed to be on a date, the very date he was so excited for.
"R-Raine he didn't s-show up." Jay says quietly over the phone and my eyes sting slightly as I hear him sniffle again.
"I'm coming over okay honey, you stay right there I'll be at yours in ten minutes." I tell Jay.
"No Raine go home." He says sadly.
"I'm coming over." I say hanging up on him, my poor little candy apple eyed munchkin.

I message Xavier quickly letting him know I'm staying at Jay's tonight. My phone buzzes again signalling he's calling.
"Raine I'm coming to pick you up, I'll drive you." Xavier says into the phone.
"Jay's house is very close, I'll be there before your even halfway here, I'll be fine I promise I'll message you when I get there okay. I'll see you later okay bye Xavier." I say ending the call before he has time to protest. It wasn't even very late I'd be fine, the streets still had many people making their way home from work.

I hurried over to Jay's home my nose completely freezing in the cold, I stuffed my hands into my pockets happy I'd worn my furry pocketed coat.

I jogged towards his door, knocking on it. Bouncing slightly as I wait for him to open the door. The door is thrown open, a red puffy eyed Jay stands behind it, dressed in a large sweater and sweat pants, his thin nose red, a tissue pressed into his hand.

I throw my arms around his neck, and he cuddles close like a little kid, sniffling softly, my little bunny. I pull away shutting the door behind us leading him to his living room where crumpled tissues litter the table. I settle him onto the couch quickly yanking off my coat and scarf, hanging them both before plopping myself beside him.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask softly.
"Raine h-he didn't even show up, I-I really like him and he didn't even show up." He says, wiping his nose with a tissue.
"Maybe there was an emergency or he got caught up in something." I offer up.

"Yeah his girlfriend." He says, what a horrible cheating skank.
"Was he bisexual?" I ask and Jay shakes his head in a no.
"He messaged me after that I was just some fun, and that he's not a faggot like me." Jay says and my heart drops.
"Oh Jay." I say softly and he licks his parched lips looking up at me with big candy apple green eyes, shining with tears.
"That's what my parents called me when they kicked me out of the house." Jay says softly. His parents were unable to accept him for who he was, and instead of attempting to understand they'd decided throwing him out and refusing to admit he was related to them was the best option.

"Jay honey you're not a faggot, that's a horrible way to put it. Why does it matter who you like, you're the funniest, brightest most adorable person on this planet, whether you like Daniel or Daniella doesn't matter." I say softly wrapping my arms around him and tugging him into me. He cuddles close into me, resting his head on my shoulder and I pat his back softly, my poor little bunny.
"I tried to kill myself Raine, when I'd first gotten here, I had no one, my own parents thought I was an abomination but then I met Sophie, and then you and you guys became my family. I promised myself I'd never cry again over somebody calling me crude names but here I am again. I'm pathetic aren't I Raine?" He asks softly.
"Jay you're not pathetic, you're the loveliest person I know, the life of the party, you hide your pain so deep within you but sometimes it comes bubbling to the surface that's not weakness that's just a crack in your steel armour, letting it out helps. Let it out Jay, you know I love you right, like the brother I've never had I'll always be here to hold you when you cry, cause you've always made me laugh when I was crying. Sophie and you may pretend to hate each other but she loves you more then herself. We'd both do anything for our naughty little sniffling bunny." I coo to him softly.

"Thank you pumpkin." He says a small smile on his face. He clears the tears on his face snuggling before throwing the tissue into the trash bin.
"No problem bunny." I say flicking his nose lightly.
"I don't know how I feel about that new nickname, I think I'm a bit too hot for it, you're gonna have to find something else." He says shaking his head in mock sympathy.
"You will always be my adorable little green eyed munchkin, and you're so adorable  when you sniffle so bunny is perfect." I say pinching his cheeks and he scowls at me slapping my hands away. His shiny green eyes still look dimmer then usual, and I remember the Lindt chocolate I had in my bag. I grab my bag, taking out the hazelnut Lindt bar I had in it, offering it to him and his eyes brighten slightly.
"Thanks pumpkin." He says grabbing it from me breaking half of it and offering me the other. I grab of it from him pressing a quick kiss to the top of his head, before getting up to grab the remote. A few good chick flicks were definitely in order.

We both sobbed silently as she waltzed into the perfume store, purchasing the bottle of the perfume he'd recommended. As beautiful a movies as Me Before You was it left both me and Jay hysterical. If Sophie were here she'd most likely make fun of us, and the knowledge she wasn't let us cry in comfort. She was the warrior as she liked to call it amongst us, I her loyal steed and Jay the damsel, with a large bust as Sophie loved to say to Jay's bemusement.

Jay and I were both buried under our own blankets, it being quite likely that we had more chocolate in our bloodstream then actual blood. We'd stuffed our faces with every chocolate thing we could find until we'd very well near puked. He'd given me some of his clothes to change into, it seemed like clothing designed for males was just always comfier.

"That was, that was oh my Raine now I just want to go out and find myself a man like that." He says and I nod in agreement my puffy eyes falling shut and I struggle to stay awake, but end up losing the battle to exhaustion.

I'm woken up by a soft plushy thing hitting the top of my head and I jolt back into the conscious world.
"What?" I mumble annoyed as I catch sight of Jay looking at me wide eyed hiding his creme coloured pillow.
"You were talking in your sleep." He says his eyes still slightly wide, voice a bit airy.
"Yeah well that's a common occurrence, now go back to sleep you nitwit." I say cuddling back into my own pillow.
"You said you loved him." Jay says and I frown at him in confusion before my eyes widen as I realize who I had been dreaming about.
"You said you loved Xavier." Jay says his mouth slightly agape.
"Are you sure?" I ask.
"Yeah Raine I wouldn't lie about this." Jay screeches.

"Maybe I just mumbled it in my sleep, like an accident." I say.
"Was it an accident, or do you actually love him?" Jay asks his brow raised.
"I don't know." I whine dropping my face onto my pillow, I'd just woken up this wasn't something I could deal with right now I wasn't even fully coherent. But matters of the heart weren't seen through using coherence.
"Oh come on Raine you have to know." He says.
"Okay at least tell me how you feel about him, how does he make you feel." He says his eyes wide as he grabs my elbow yanking me so I'm sitting up properly facing him.

"I don't know, I just with him I'm just I'm, I'm so many things. Im at ease, but I can't breathe. He makes my heartbeat quicken until its beating it's way out of my chest, makes my mouth go dry. I can't think clearly when I'm around him and it's terrifying but I've never felt safer then when I'm with him. We are complete opposites but we go together so well as if we were two parts of a puzzle made to be placed together. Every moment away from him feels like an eternity, and every moment with him like a blissful forever. It hurts to be away from him, it hurts to see him hurt, to see him frown. When he smiles or laughs my spirits just lift instantly, it's uncontrollable. He looks at me in this way that just its inexplicable, the way that he looks at me suddenly I don't feel ordinary anymore. It's as if I'm the solution to every unanswered question, every problem, some sort of miracle." I finish off.

My eyes widen as I turn back to Jay who's already staring at me.
"I love him." I breathe out, looking back at Jay who nods smiling.
"I have to tell him." I say and Jay nods again, seeming to be unable to do anything else.
"Okay well tomorrow when he comes to pick me up." I say pulling my blanket up to my shoulders again, only to have it yanked rudely by Jay.
"No Raine now, come on I'm driving you, get changed back into your sweater or he's gonna kill me if he sees you in my clothes and then probably carry you away and make you spaghetti." He says and I stare at him wide eyed, those were the most likely order of events. But I just couldn't do it now, that was scary and it was so late. This wasn't the right time for a declaration of love, but then what was.
"Come on Raine, life is too short to not tell the person you love that you love them. Don't make him pine any longer." He says and I nod slowly. He was right I had to tell him.

"Let's go." I yell suddenly grabbing his arm and tugging him up.
"Wait here, I'll just change." I say, my heartbeat is off the charts as I change quickly in Jays washroom, tugging back on my creme sweater and leggings.

"Okay I'm ready." I say, and Jay grabs my hand running out the door screeching like the imbecile he was. I barely register the drive, the sound of my blood pumping is so loud in my ears. I loved Xavier, I loved him. I was in love with the very man I'd been terrified of just months back. The car stops and I look at Jay wide eyed, about to ask him why we stopped until I realize we were already there.
"Thank you." I say to Jay and he nods grabbing me into a hug.
"Oh my babies growing up so fast." He says pressing a kiss to the side of my head.
"Good luck baba pie." He calms after me as I run towards the door.

I fumble through my purse my hands shaking as I force the key into the door, slowly unlocking the door. I try to calm my breath as I make my way in. I set my scarf and coat on the table in the foyer too excited to hang it, now I just had to find Xavier. Keeping my bag with me, in my anxious state I wanted to have something soft to cling onto. A thump sounds from further into the home, curse his home for being so large.

Holding my bag tightly to my chest I tip toe towards from where the noise had sounded, I would surprise him. An uncontrollable smile comes onto my face despite the way my heart beats frantically in my chest. I was nearly breathless. Another loud crash sounded almost making me scream, nearly giving away my position what was that man doing, throwing himself into walls.

I rested my hand onto my chest, leaning against the wall for a minute trying to gather myself, so I wasn't panting in front of him. I leaned around the wall to peak into the hallway in which Xavier was, turning into the room but my steps faltered at what I saw, my smile dropping on it's own accord, my lips parting as my mouth went dry. My heart seeming to stand still for a moment before picking up its frantic beating but this time, for a whole other reason.