I stood outside Sebastian's car with my arms crossed. My bag was starting to weigh down on me, the straps hurting my shoulders and making them sore. Soon a presence was felt behind me. With a split second glance, I could see Sebastian looking down guiltily. He gave a small sigh before he walked away and to the other side of the car. Unlocking the car, he clicked a button to unlock my side.

I pulled the door open and took a seat, pulling my bag off and setting it on the floor mat. We were silent for a bit. I had a feeling that neither of us would be going to class today. All of this drama is proving bad for my grades. There's going to be so much makeup work since we have six different classes.

Once Sebastian walked around and got in the car, I wasted no time turning towards him. I waited, hoping he would speak first. When no explanation came, I knew I'd have to force the answers out of him. I hated feeling like I couldn't even talk to him easily. He's one of my best friends and I love him.

I take a deep breath and clear my throat. "Why?" I ask first of all. Perhaps this would make it easier for him.

"I didn't ask to be gay, Emie." He mumbles, shaking his head.

I'm flabbergasted by his answer. I can feel my eyebrows are furrowed and my mouth is dropped opened. It only just now occurs to me that Sebastian believes that I'm angry at him for being gay. How could he think that? I would never judge him for his sexual orientation. I was angry, yes, but because he had used me all these years. Not to mention, he technically cheated on me and he didn't even seem remorseful. That's why I'm so upset, not because he's gay.

"Jesus, Sebastian." I scoff and look away from him. "Do you think so low of me? That I would hate you for liking guys?"

When I look back over at him, he's staring over at me with a puppy dog expression. He just looks so discouraged and it breaks my heart. His eyes have tears in them and I'm not sure if it's because he's ashamed or scared.

"Emie...I'm sorry, okay?" He shakes his head. "This is no excuse, but you know how small towns can be. You know my parents...I just...I thought you'd be the same. Your reaction yesterday..."

I lift my hand up to cover his mouth. "You listen and you listen well, Sebastian Caldwell." I give him a look, hoping it's intense enough for him to understand me. I want my feeling to permeate through him. "I'm not mad because you like guys. I don't care if you like guys, girls, both, or whatever.

I care that you used me for so long. You took my feelings and turned that into a cover for you and that's not okay. I love you, Sebastian. I'm in love with you and I hate that you don't feel the same way. I hate that I believed that you did love me, that you made me feel that way only to take my heart and break it. I trusted you with something so fragile. If you had just talked to me so much earlier."

A lone tear falls from my left eye. I had read somewhere once that when a tear falls from your left eye first, it symbolizes pain. If that's true then it's one hundred percent correct because I feel nothing but pain right now.

Sebastian chokes up, tears falling from his own eyes. A sob leaves him as he presses his head against the steering wheel. His shoulder shake violently as he lets it all out. It's terrible that he had to feel all of this by himself. I would've bared his pain with him.

I lift my hand and place it on his back, rubbing it and hoping he'd find comfort.

"I hate myself, Emie." Sebastian stutters out, a cough leaving him from his cries. "I hate what I am. I don't want to be gay, fuck."

I gasp in horror. "Sebastian!"

He lifts his head from the steering wheel. His eyes look angry now, red and irritated. Tears still fall, but I'd say it's more frustration now. With a shake of his head, his arm bursts from his side and shooting for the steering wheel. His fist lands on the curve, emitting a small thud from the impact and making me jump. Sebastian's chest is moving rapidly.

"I want you, Emie. You're perfect and I do love you." He looks over at me, his expression anguished. "I love you so much and I'm just so confused."

I scoot over in the seat. Sebastian's truck was one of the ones that just had a long seat in the front. I had mentioned that it was old, but not kind of car it was. I'm not sure of the model, but what I do know is that it's perfect to go to drive-in theaters with.

I shift so that my body is facing him before reaching up to grab his face. Using my thumbs, I begin wiping the tears from his cheeks, but new ones replace the old. A sigh leaves me when sebastian's eyes close. I know it's because he doesn't want to face me. I pinch his cheek lightly which makes them turn red and his eyes to open. Giving him a small smile, I scoot impossibly closer and press my forehead to his.

"Don't hate yourself." I whisper to him. "There's nothing wrong with like the same sex, Sebastian, no matter what anybody says. I know this is a small town, I know people talk, but if they have nothing better to do than gossip then they're who we should feel bad for."

He closes his eyes again and I do the same. I need him to hear me because he needs to know that changing doesn't always mean something bad.

"You're amazing the way you are. Liking guys doesn't make you a monster and it doesn't make you a different person."

Sebastian breathes deeply. From the sound, I know that he's crying again. I've never seen him so emotional before, but it seems we're all learning new things about each other.

"God, you're amazing." Sebastian says. He pulls back and opens his eyes. I hate seeing him like this: eyes red, nose red, pale faced. "I'm gonna marry you, Emerson Badgely."

A small giggle leaves me. "No you're not, Sebastian." I shake my head. "I'm not the one for you. Now, start this baby up and let's go get breakfast."

* * *

Sebastian and I had actually driven out of Elderwood. Our sister town was called Crystalwood. Supposedly Elderwood was here first with their nice, old trees, then Crystalwood came along. Another legend goes that the towns were founded by two brothers. The oldest name our town while the younger named Crystalwood for all the lakes or ponds or whatever. They're as clear as crystals.

We had chosen to leave Elderwood to get away from prying eyes. Our parents would be notified of our absence from school, but if the townsfolk saw us out and about, we'd be labeled as delinquents. Not only that, but a rumor would spread and more than likely be about a possible pregnancy. And our parents would be very notified.

"So...have you talked to Cody?" I question, popping a french fry into my mouth. The cooked potato slice is still hot, causing me to open my mouth and breathe rapidly.

Sebastian watches, laughter in his eyes. He takes a sip of his coke before shaking his head. "No, I've been too confused and too guilty."

"Ten," I sigh. I don't want to ruin the mood, but I need him to know that he's forgiven. "I forgive you, okay? I'm sorry for overreacting."

Sebastian shook his head as he grabbed his burger and chomped down onto it. I watched the way his jaw clenched and unclenched as he chewed and the way his lips glistened from the grease of the patty. My heart sped up and my cheeks grew red. I wasn't allowed to think of Sebastian this way anymore. I had to look away as his tongue jutted out against his bottom lip.

"I cheated on you." Sebastian swallowed, his voice coming out as a whisper. "I hate myself for hurting you like that and I don't want to do it again. We're still in a relationship."

"No we're not, Ten." I tell him slowly. There was no way I was going to trap him into a relationship just because I cried. "You need to pursue other things...like your sexuality."

Sebastian made a face. His lips curled down and his eyes winced as if he was hurt. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about."

I motioned for him to continue. Perhaps he'd tell me he wanted to remain friends. I mulled over that as I ate another fry, dipping another one into some ketchup.

"I want you to be my beard." Sebastian said abruptly, causing me to choke on the red coated fry.

What the heck is a beard?

*Hey there dudes and dudettes. Thanks so much for tuning in, and I'm so sorry that it took me so long to update. Life kind of has been kicking me in the rear! I'm so glad Sebastian and Emie have made up. She's not looking so ignorant now right? We all love an accepting queen, yes? Because I know I do. How did you think this chapter faired out? Did Sebastian explaining himself help to give a better understanding? I hope so! Also we saw a very sensitive side of him. Men do cry guys and I love it! Please don't forget to vote and comment. I love hearing your thoughts on the chapters. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it!*