Chapter 13

Daffy: I can't believe we got double-crossed by a tiny rodent.

Sylvester: Oh, we got double-crossed by a rodent all right, but, uh, not a tiny one.

Daffy: What?

Sylvester: This was supposed to be us conning Creek. It turns out it was Wile conning us. Does that sound familiar to you, Wile?

Wile: Why-why would you think that?

Sylvester: Oh, I don't know, maybe because you just sabotaged the biggest heist of our lives. I think you owe us an explanation, buddy.

Wile: (sighs) Okay. You're right. This is what happened. Back in the museum, I just tried to steal an old lady's purse. Classic snatch and grab.

Lola: Tried to? Since when do you try to steal something and not just steal it?

Wile: I was trying to steal the purse when the old lady fell and... (clears throat) I kind of helped her.

Sylvester: What?!

Wile: I kind of helped her.

Taz: But then you stole her purse.

Wile (chuckling): No, I didn't. I saved the old lady, and she hugged me, and my tail wagged, and I didn't know what it was, but it felt, uh, you know... good.

Daffy, Lola and Taz: (gasp)

Taz: Ah. But then you stole the purse.

OTHERS: No!

Sylvester: You know, I heard what the troll said to you about cutting us loose.

Daffy: Wait. Like, "us" us?

Sylvester: But I never thought you'd actually do it, man.

Wile: Hey, hey, hey, hey. I-I would never... I was trying to... I was trying to find us a better life.

Sylvester: Our life was perfect until you decided to ruin it.

Wile: I didn't. You guys felt it at the gala. The clapping, the cheering. We were more than... than just scary villains. They loved us.

Sylvester: Oh, yeah? If they loved us so much, how come we're in prison for a crime we didn't commit? You know what? I'll give Creek this. At least he sees the world for what it is: a place where some people are scary and some people are scared.

Wile: Oh, yeah? Well, I'm tired of being scary. I'm-I'm tired of being an outcast. Maybe I don't want to be a...

Sylvester: What? A Bad Guy? Don't want to be a Bad Guy anymore, huh? Say it, Wile. Yeah, I thought so. And us, your lifelong friends? We're just holding you back?

Wile: Yeah, maybe you are!

Daffy, Taz and Lola: (gasps)

Sylvester: (snarls) Take it back! Take it back! Apologize!

GUARD: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! Prison is no place for fighting.

guard 2: (groaning): Tell that to him.

Wile: W-W-Wait, wait. Ho-Hold on.

(others gasping)

ALL: Sally?

Taz: But how do you know how to do all of that kick-kick-punch-punch?

Wile: Wait a sec, you're the Crimson Paw? The queen of cons, acrobatic Swiss Army knife. Stole the Zumpango diamond twice. Once for profit, second time just for fun. Never identified, never caught.

Sally: (chuckles) Guess I'm still the best bad guy the world has ever seen. Ugh, at least I used to be. Nope, I'm still the best. Just like riding a stolen bicycle. Oh, uh, you got a little... Ouch.

Wile: Hey, wh-why did you save us anyway?

Sally: After the gala, I knew something wasn't right, so I did some investigating, and that meteor...

Wile: I know. Some kind of cosmic mega-super-antennae thing.

Sally: Right. If conducted through an array of ionized crystals, it will generate a massive psychokinetic field the size of a city. Oh, my gosh. Did I interrupt you? Were you gonna say that?

Wile: Uh, I-I-I was gonna be a little more technical, but you got the gist of it.

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