Hey guys! Here's the update as promised!!! This chapter is a bit of a hot mess and I'm just a mess minus the hot part at the moment! Anyways, Enjoy :)

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RYAN'S POV

"Luke do you still love Alyssa?" I asked him once and for all as we sat in the kitchen while his mom attempted the almost impossible feat of waking up the little Fratellis.

He'd gone back to worrying the second we woke up. Or rather, the second I woke up, because he understandably hadn't been able to sleep at all.

"Of course I do! I don't remember a time when I didn't." He answered with a deep sigh, "But the question is whether or not she still loves me..."

"She's mad at you but that doesn't mean she hates you." I reasoned with him. I tried to sound positive in the face of all the negatives he was coming up with, "If you guys both love each other, that's the most important thing. Everything else will work itself out."

"It's going to be so hard, I don't know how I'm supposed to take care of Alyssa or how to protect her from the judgement she's going to face at school." He sighed.

"It's not going to be easy, but it's just like Coach always says, 'no pain, no gain.'" I told him. I disliked how corny it sounded, but it was true.

Luke paused pensively, and in the silence we heard the cries of cranky children being pulled from their beds.

"...I mean I guess I'd always figured I would end up starting a family with Lys, but now it's just a little sooner than I expected." I saw a smile tug at the corner of his mouth.

I gave him a reassuring grin; I finally got through to him.

"Thanks Ryan, I don't know what I would have done without you."

"Don't mention it." I said, smiling as I took a sip from the coffee mug in my hands.

"But seriously, thank you." He said earnestly, making a point of looking directly at me to show his sincerity, "And things will work out for you too bro, you'll see."  He continued optimistically.

"Being a father? Well the last time I checked, I kind of need a girlfriend for that." I joked.

Dry eyed and back to his cheerful self, Luke laughed along with me.

 "No," he said lightly punching my arm, "I meant with you and Ava."

".....?" I gave him the best confused look I could muster but it wasn't exactly very convincing.

"Don't play dumb. I told you I wasn't going to forget about it last night." He said with a satisfied smirk.  "I might look oblivious, but I've seen what goes on when you guys are together.  It's pretty obvious she cares about you."

Luke was trying to get through to me now, and I probably should let him. It wasn't the greatest feeling trying to keep everything to myself all the time...

I sighed as I gave in.

 "I can never tell what she really wants." I began, "And I've resigned to the fact that she just doesn't feel the same way I do. The way she cares about me, is evidently not enough to want to be with me."

"Hey, don't be so hard on yourself, did you ever stop and think that she might have her own reasons for holding back?" He said, looking as serious as he could with his mouth half stuffed with pancakes and bacon.

I, on the other hand, couldn't seem to find my appetite as I took another small sip of the bitter, black brew.

"I can't think of any reason other than that she has doubts about me, about what would happen if she became my girlfriend and things ended badly. The thing we agreed on was that we're really good as friends. And maybe I have no self-control, but I can't help but want more...and I thought that she did too."

"Well I can't say that part doesn't confuse me." He mused as his thick brows furrowed together in deep thought.  "The Ava I know is spontaneous and decisive and she does things wholeheartedly; she'd never be half-assed about anything, especially if it's something important to her.  She's usually the one to take the dare, to take the risk, so I'm not sure why she's suddenly become hesitant. I mean, don't tell me you haven't noticed that recently she's kind of lost that spark she usually has." He finished as he looked to me expectantly for my response.

I hadn't even noticed that. Luke was right; that spark that Ava has, the way her eyes used to twinkle when she laughed, the way her heels clicked confidently as she walked, it had diminished. She didn't seem herself recently, and I didn't notice because I was so focused on wondering what was wrong with me...

Or could it really be that there was something else she was dealing with that I didn't know about?

Could I even dare to think that she actually returned my feelings, but was stopping herself for some unknown reason?

She kissed me.

The way she looked at me, was like I was important to her;

Like I wasn't just her 'friend'...

But then again, she didn't say anything. She was silent.

 She doesn't have enough feelings for me to say it. Or even give me an explanation. Maybe that's why I just can't let go; she keeps fighting against this magnetic pull I feel between us but she can't give me a good reason why we can't be together. Maybe she does have reasons she just doesn't want to tell me about.

She doesn't trust me enough to be able to tell me the truth...

"...Maybe I'm just a risk she doesn't think is worth taking." I said finally, as Luke waved his hand in front of my face, breaking me out of my dismal reverie.

"No. Snap out of it dude! I refuse to believe that there is anything wrong with you. You are one of the most decent guys I know and Ava knows that too; we ALL do. There has to be something else."  He refuted wholeheartedly as he pushed a stack of pancakes in front of me and motioned for me to eat.

"What if there's nothing? What if she really just doesn't want me." I mused as I mechanically picked up a fork and tried to eat the food that Gabriella had woken up so early to make for us.

"Ryan I've seen the way she looks at you when she thinks no one's watching." He told me as he flashed a cheeky, suggestive grin.

No way, I thought I was the only one that did that.

"...then how do I find out what's really going on?" I asked, sounding a little brusque as I turned so that he couldn't see the blush on my cheeks that gave away the immediate buzz of exhilaration that resonated through me; good one brain, you just had to go and imagine what it would feel like if I caught Ava looking at me the way I look at her, didn't you?

"Talk to her." Luke said simply, all traces of teasing vanished as he squeezed my shoulder supportively.

"But_" I started to say self-critically.

"No buts. 'No pain, no gain' remember?" He grinned knowingly as he repeated my own words back to me.

... Well I couldn't be a hypocrite now could I?

"You're going to be a great father Luke." I returned a half smile as I realised what he'd done.

"HAHA I actually thought I sounded like a Dad just then too!" He laughed enthusiastically as he downed the last of his glass of orange juice.

"Do you think you're ready to make up with Alyssa?" I prodded gently.

"Yeah, I've realised some things; I'm always going to love her and I'm going to love our baby more than any other stupid guy that thinks he can take my place ever will." He said broodingly.

"We better hurry then, I'll drive since I have to drop by my house and get my stuff for school."

"We should get her flowers, girls like flowers from their boyfriends when they've done something wrong__" Luke rambled on enthusiastically as he grabbed his bag and we proceeded to leave.

"Have a good day boys!" Gabriella called out to us as she re-entered the kitchen, the little Fratellis trailing after her, somehow fully dressed and immaculately groomed despite 4 little frowns and sleepy, half-open eyes.

I should rely on other people more often...it's nice to know I don't have to go through everything on my own.

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AVA'S POV

"So Alyssa, how long do you think you've been pregnant for?" My mom asked, a calm, professional tone to her voice that she reserved for talking to her patients.

Alyssa had come over bright and early to have her check-up, and Rose and Kim had also tagged along for support. I was exhausted after the emotional events of the previous day, but this was more important, and I had forced myself to wake up and attempt to make myself look presentable.

"Well that's the thing, I don't know exactly how long." Alyssa replied, sitting rigidly on our couch opposite my mom as Kim, Rose and I gave her some space and sat in the kitchen.

" My period is late, I've been having mood swings and Luke found out recently that the pack of condoms we've been using have expired. I'm also on birth control, for my period,  but there was one day where I didn't take it... And we did it on that day." Alyssa explained, her voice starting to tremble at the last part. "As for the tests, I waited for a while before checking because I wanted to really make sure. And then when I checked back, they were all was positive." She continued.

My heart broke for her as I saw small tears trickle down her cheeks as she tried to stay strong but was visibly beginning to shake.

"Luke's leaving me and my parents are gonna kill me when they find out, and-"She paused to wipe her tears away with trembling fingers, "I can't raise this baby on my own!" she exclaimed as she finally allowed herself to cry

Kim, Rose and I had all jumped out of our seats ready to go comfort her, but then my Mom spoke.

"Alright Alyssa I want you to listen to me," she said firmly as she grabbed Alyssa by the shoulders, "You are a not a little girl, you're a woman and you can do this. You're young yes, and you made a bad decision one time, but don't let it define you."

Alyssa's eyes had widened in stunned silence, and so had mine.

"Don't let it ruin your life before it's even started. There are so many cases of successful women who had children early, with or without a husband. Yes it was hard but I guarantee you that 100% of them would tell you it was worth it. It's all worth it when you see your child happy." She continued.

...Mom

Yes I had a dad until I was 10, but my mom had been raising me on her own for the last 8 years.

And for the past 8 years I've been shutting her out.

"And you know what? Your parents feel the same way about you. They love you. Yes they'll be upset at first, but you have to understand it's because they don't want you to suffer, they don't want you to have a hard life. But it's their grandchild we're talking about here, their flesh and blood that they will love unconditionally, just like you.

You also need to know that your future isn't ruined! There are still so many possibilities waiting for you that you don't even know about yet.

And don't be too hard on Luke, he's 18 years old and for most 18 year old boys, a baby is the last thing that passes through their mind. He's in shock, but he loves you and he is a good person.

Whether or not you guys stay together, he will be there for your child. This child will bring you together. Don't think of it as a mistake, it was an accident, but not a mistake."

The room was silent for a moment as everybody was struck in awe of this incredible woman who apparently gave birth to me.

Alyssa had stopped crying and shaking altogether as she spoke again, " Luke was just so freaked out when I showed him the tests...the first thing he asked me was how soon we could put the baby up for adoption!"

"Exactly how long did you wait before you checked for the result?" My mom asked sceptically.

"I gave it a long time, so like 20 minutes per test..." Alyssa replied.

My mom pulled her work bag towards her from where it was laying on the floor and took out a new pregnancy test kit.

"Can you do one more for me and check after 3 minutes?" She asked as she handed Alyssa the box.

"Ok."

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We all waited impatiently for Alyssa to come out from the bathroom with the test. Apparently my mom had given her the most sensitive pregnancy test on the market, so we would soon know not only if Alyssa was truly pregnant, but also how many weeks along she was.

We heard a muffled flush as Alyssa appeared from around the corner, the test in hand and a confused expression on her face as she passed the little white stick to my mom.

We held our breath as my mom slid on her glasses and inspected the reading.

"See this?" She said, pointing to the solitary red bar on the stick. "This is a negative result."

Oh my god

"If you wait too long before checking the result, other factors can alter the result of the test and cause it to be inaccurate. The bottom line is, you're not pregnant."

"Oh my god thank god." Alyssa said all in a rush as she brought her hands to her face and sunk down into the chair in pure relief.

Rose and Kim immediately enveloped her in a big hug and I was about to do the same when suddenly my phone vibrated loudly in my pocket.

**Ring Ring**

It was Luke.

Perfect timing!

"Hey Luke." I said brightly as I answered the call.

"Ava! Where is Alyssa? Her parents said she went to your house is she there? Shit I'm so worried, she hates me right now!"

"Woah calm down boy, it's ok. She is here, my mom just gave her a check-up. Come over, I'm sure she needs you more than anyone else right now." I said comfortingly.

"Thanks Ava we're on our way now."

"We?"

"Me and Ryan; he stayed over at mine last night and did a damn good job of keeping me sane while I was thinking some pretty stupid and crazy shit." He said enthusiastically.

The relief that flooded through me was indescribable. Ryan was ok. Thank God.

 "See you soon" Luke finished hastily as he abruptly cut the call.

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My mom had decided to sit all of us down and give as a lecture about sexual health. I'd heard it all before from her but after today's pregnancy scare, it wouldn't hurt to listen again.

But suddenly the doorbell rang 5 times and when we called out that the door was unlocked,  Luke frantically burst in with a large bouquet of flowers in his hands, his eyes searching for Alyssa until he spotted her on our couch.

"Alyssa I love you, I'm scared but I love you and I love our baby and I'll never leave you and I'll do my best to be a good father and I'm probably going to make a million mistakes and be an idiot but I'm your idiot so please give me another chance.

Please forgive me, I just didn't want to turn out like...like my dad." He looked away guiltily as Alyssa got up and walked over to him with tears in her eyes.

"We can do this." He said, looking at her like there was no one else in the room, "We can do anything. As long as we're together."

Then he got down on one knee.

Oh shit. Oh my god Luke?? Was he about to_

"I don't have a ring with me but...Alyssa, will you marry me?"

There was a loud audible gasp from all of us as we processed what just happened.

Taking his face into her hands she looked down at him, her eyes reflecting how much she loved him, and told him the good news "Luke, it was a false positive. I'm not pregnant."

He pulled her down into his arms and they both started crying and hugging each other.

"But for the record, I'll still marry you, just a little later on." She said, causing me and the girls to look up at each other and silently squeal at how cute our friends were.

"I'm actually almost sad we're not going to have a baby..." Luke suddenly said.

"Huh?"

"I mean, I never really thought too much about it before and obviously now is not the right time, but I can just imagine how perfect our baby would be, he or she would have their mommy's eyes, and their daddy's dashing good looks." He grinned goofily as Alyssa rolled her eyes and lightly punched his arm, though it was obvious she wasn't really annoyed at all.

"It'll happen soon enough," my mom smiled happily at them as they got up from the floor, "but in the mean time you have got to be a bit more responsible." She continued, the typical 'nagging mom' tone finding its way back into her voice.

"We will be. Thank you so much Lisa!" Both Luke and Alyssa said gratefully, clearly still stunned with relief.

Mom you're my hero. I thought as I watched her pack up her work bag.

Even though I would describe myself as a daddy's girl, my mom was my hero.  The way she went out all the time saving lives, the thought always blew my mind. When I was 6 years old a man had a heart attack in a restaurant we were having dinner in, and my mom sprang into action before I could even comprehend what was going on. I couldn't believe that I had seen that man die, and my mom brought him back to life.

Now, my friends thought they were watching their future die, and my mom brought it back to life. Even if it wasn't a real pregnancy, it had certainly felt real.

I need to cut her some slack. She's out saving lives all the time and I sometimes treat her like she's ruining mine. It's the job she was born to do, and I should support her more.

In my peripheral vision I saw Poptart amble down the stairs, probably trying to work out what all the commotion was about, and I walked over to her hoping she wasn't grumpy from being woken up or something.

"This is good news for you huh Pops?" I said to my kitten as I felt her brush by my feet and look up at me with her head cocked curiously to the side.

"Mew?" She mewled as if she was asking 'why?'

"Looks like you'll still be the only baby in our lives for the time being." I smiled as I scooped the little fluff-ball up into my arms and squeezed her tight.

And for once she didn't try to scratch me or jump out of my death-hug; instead she purred and rubbed her little head against my chin.

"Why are you being so cute to me hmm?" I murmured as I stroked her just under her chin, earning me a satisfied purr, "First you snuggled up to me in bed last night when I got home, and now you you're letting me pet you when I've already given you your breakfast!" It was like she could tell I was going through a rough time.

"Mew." She mewled again, as if to say "less talking, more petting please."

"Ok fine, but only because you're being extra adorable." I laughed as I kissed the top of her head and scratched gently just behind her ears.

Suddenly her body stilled, and her ears twitched towards the door as if she detected a sound I couldn't hear. Before I knew it, she leapt out of my arms and bounded down the hallway behind me, towards the open doorway as fast as her little paws could carry her.

I sighed as I trailed after her, inspecting my top for cat fur to brush away; she probably heard a bird chirping in the garden or something.

"Hey there's my girl," I heard an all too familiar voice say. And I froze.

"There's my good girl," he spoke again as my eyes flew to where he stood at the door stroking the head of my traitorous kitten as she seemed to have latched herself permanently onto his chest.

For one second I thought you were talking to me...

Does it sound crazy that right now I am not even embarrassed to admit that I'm jealous of my cat?

I would be a good girl for you if it meant you'd give me the special treatment you're currently spoiling Poptart with...I closed my eyes just for a second as I remembered what it felt like to have those strong arms wrapped around me...

As I opened them again, his gaze flickered to mine and the smile he had on for my kitten, slowly slipped away when he saw me, standing alone in the hallway.

Ryan stood in the front entrance, just a foot inside, as if he didn't want to intrude. Or more likely he didn't want to be too close to me...

He looked like he'd been standing there for a while and I didn't even know.

Which means he saw me talking like a crazy cat lady to Poptart!

Great.  Just great.

I felt my skin prickle with a wave of self-consciousness and embarrassment.

Just do it Ava. Suck it up and do it. Tell him you love him.

So somehow the little voice in my head managed to find me the courage to go over to him, if he evidently didn't want to come to me.

He visibly stiffened when he registered me coming over.

I swallowed nervously, my eyes trying to search his as I gathered up the courage to keep going.

I wasn't usually lacking in the confidence department, but Ryan made me feel...vulnerable.

Standing 2 feet away from him, I offered an awkward half smile as a greeting, with an attempted cheerfulness that didn't quite reach my eyes; I couldn't hide that were exhausted with worry.

He quietly cleared his throat as he straightened up and shifted his posture.

"Can we talk?" I asked gently, wary of the raw look I saw in his eyes before he quickly masked it.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea..." He said quietly, averting his eyes as he slowly folded his arms against his chest; as if he were putting on armour.

Ouch. Fresh, searing pain sliced through me as his words stung like needles.

He's mad, of course he would be. Maybe I should back out....NO I can't, he has to know.

But how was I supposed to go about this? I've never been very good at small talk...

"I never tried to play games with you." I blurted out quickly, my fingers anxiously grasping at the cuffs of my long-sleeved top.  I needed him to take me seriously. I needed to explain how stupid I had been.

Finally he looked directly at me, and I got a glimpse into the blue depths of unknown emotions clouding his eyes.

"Maybe you never intended to, but with all that's happened between us... there are so many things weighing on my mind and so many questions I can't seem to find answers to. I don't know if I can take on any more when the stuff I've been losing my mind over still hasn't become any clearer. " He continued, his voice low and his tone still so formal.

Any other guy would have been yelling insults at me by now, telling me how they were so much better than me, or that I was crazy for not wanting to be with them, that I wasted their time or whatever dumb shit. There had been a few like that....thankfully only a few, and I stood my ground, eventually shaking them off.

But it was different with Ryan, and I couldn't give up now.

"Please," I pleaded, imploring him with the emotions I allowed to reflect in my eyes. His eyebrows rose slightly in surprise as my hands subconsciously placed themselves on his forearms, easing them out of their tight, interlocked hold.

"Maybe I can make things clearer for you." I certainly hoped he'd get my message loud and clear.

He sighed a little shakily; as if he was trying to hold something in, preventing it from being released.

"I'd rather you not say anything if you're about to tell me you want to go back to being just friends. I don't know if I'm at the point where I can even think about that yet..." He said as one arm fell to his side, and the other raised to rub the back of his neck uncomfortably.

I hate how hard it seems for him to talk to me...

"We'll never be able to be friends again..." I started to say, still reeling from the quick movement of his arms that caused my hands to retract reflexively.

He sighed again and turned away from me, "That's even worse," He mumbled to himself dejectedly.

No, he misunderstood! I didn't mean we couldn't be friends anymore, I meant just the opposite! I wanted to be more than friends.

"That's not what I meant!" I said quickly, almost urgently as my hand automatically reached out to grab his arm and turn him back to me.

I'd never get used to the tiny electric shocks that buzzed up my arm and amplified throughout my body; all from something as simple as touching him.

But he turned around faster than I expected and I stumbled forward right into him, surprising both of us.

I should have stepped back immediately and given him space but I couldn't pull myself away from the wave of sensations that washed over me. Call me masochistic but I knew I'd never get used to the way that being so close to him, his eyes boring into mine, sucked all of the oxygen out of the room and left my chest feeling unbearably tight.

And yet, he didn't step back either.

"Well what did you mean then?" He whispered almost hesitantly as his gaze flickered to my hand which had slipped down to his wrist,  as if he was trying his damn hardest to keep his expectations low, to stop himself from hoping for anything from me at all. Because I'd let him down too many times before.

What did I mean? How was I going to tell him? Just say it straight out? Hint at it?Shit, how do I tell him when my mouth feels like it's clamped shut?

"I__can't look at you without thinking that you're more than just a friend. " I said sincerely as finally slipped my hand into his and interwove our fingers. Would my actions get him to understand when my brain struggled to find the right words?

This was so hard.  My heart was hammering loudly as his eyes, clouded by conflicting emotions, widened momentarily in surprise, but didn't seem to become any clearer.

"What am I to you then? More than a friend, but not quite enough to be anything else?"

"No that's not-"

"It would be easier if you just completely rejected me right now." He averted his eyes from my stunned gaze. "Just say it, tell me you don't care about me. Tell me you never did." He said painfully, twisting the knife in deeper as I saw his blue eyes grow glassy with emotion.

"I can't do that, you know I can't!" I protested in a hushed tone, leaning in closer in an attempt to draw as little attention as possible from the rest of the group in the living room.

"I know... I'm sorry, that was selfish." He somehow, by the grace of his angelic nature, managed to look guiltily at me, when he had done nothing wrong, when he had said nothing I didn't deserve.

"I can't tell what you really want Ava."

"What I want? It's not that simple Ryan! I've gone and made a mess of everything because I didn't realise that all this time... you...I,"

I wanted you, but I wanted you to be happy more, and I didn't think I could be the person who could do that. But I want to try. I have to try. Because I love you.

I paused, trying to gather as much courage as possible, holding his hand tighter, as if it would give me strength.

"All this time I've been in L-"

"Ava!" My mom suddenly called out.

Shit!

Ryan and I sprang apart quickly, my hand suddenly cold and empty with the loss of his warm palm and long fingers. That feeling, that urge to be close to him quickly returning just seconds after we separated, as we spotted my mother and the rest of the gang peering over to where we stood.

DAMNIT MOM, just when I worked up the courage, just when I was about to end this ache in my chest, just when I was ready to tell Ryan the truth and make that dream I had come true!

She seemed puzzled for a moment as she looked to me, then to Ryan and then back to me again.

Then her expression changed to one of comprehension as she came to some unspoken conclusion.

 "Ava make sure you tell me if you start getting sexually active with Ryan, I'll get you a prescription for the pill."

Oh.

My.

God.

She did not just__ did she just?....she did.

F*ck.

So much for Mom being my hero; right at this moment I wanted to strangle her!

I felt all the colour drain from my face, but as I looked to Ryan, his reaction was just the opposite; his cheeks went so red he looked like he would go up in flames any second now.

Can I just crawl into a hole and never come back out?

I smacked my forehead hard and squeezed my eyes shut, wishing I could just disappear, as Rose quietly explained to my mom that Ryan and I weren't together...even though I wish we were.

"Oh..." Was all my mom said in response.

Let me tell you, my mother handles embarrassment very bluntly; by providing some sort of random patch-up for her mistake and exiting the scene as quickly as possible.

"Well when you two start dating, then let me know. I have to go to work now, bye kids."

THAT WAS NOT THE RESPONSE YOU SHOULD HAVE GIVEN, MOTHER.

But maybe even she could see just how badly I had wanted to be with him for so long, that she just assumed what I wished was true...

Well at least she gave me something to talk to Ryan about.

"Sorry about my mom, she can be really...blunt sometimes." I apologised to him, still feeling absolutely humiliated.

"I uh... it's ok." He mumbled quickly, his cheeks still flushed in embarrassment.

I couldn't blame him, what exactly do you say in response to that?!

"Come on guys, we better get going or we're going to be late for school." Said Kim, her words seeming to set everyone back into motion.

"Ryan my man, I'm buying you lunch" Luke said slinging an arm around Ryan's shoulder and pulling him out the door and away from me.

And as Alyssa approached me for a hug, I caught one last glimpse of Ryan's face looking at me with a bemused expression. Almost like he knew what I was going to say, and didn't want Luke to pull him away so I could finish saying it.

My cheeks, felt so red as I thought about how I couldn't even finish confessing to him before we were interrupted and how embarrassing it would be to have to work up the courage to try again later.

But then the unexpected happened.

"Library at lunch?" He mouthed wordlessly to me over his shoulder as he reached his car.

He's giving me another chance!

"...I promise." I mouthed back, unable to hide the small, embarrassed smile of relief that twitched at the corner of my lips.

That was all I needed, one more chance.

...Or so I thought.

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DUN DUN DUN!!!!!!! I love a good cliff hanger and chances are you won't be able to predict the twist that's heading their way ;)

Ugh I just want to skip to the part when they get together already but that wouldn't make such a good story now would it?

Be patient guys, Ava and Ryan still both have their own personal issues that they need to deal with, things they have to come to terms with about themselves and things they need to realise.

And we haven't seen the last of Melissa yet...

At the moment uni is making me sleep deprived and also want to cry, so I can't tell you for sure when the next chapter will be out.

But know that a lot of crazy stuff is still yet to come!

Take care! I love you all and your kind comments make me want to cry the good kind of tears!

Cerise xx :)