Hey guys, SUPRISE!!! An extra chapter très très early, as a thank you and an apology for being so late in updating :(
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RYAN’S POV:

Well, she did it to me again.

Let’s go back
Let’s forget about everything
Let’s pretend it never happened ok?

The indifferent tone in her voice echoed over and over again in my ears, each times was a stab to my heart more painful than the last.

‘Friends,’ ‘Friendship,’ ‘Just as friends,’ ‘you’re an important friend;’

I DON’T WANT TO BE JUST FRIENDS!

But I didn’t want to loser her, so I did the same thing every guy who has ever been in the friendzone does; you stay ‘friends’ because being her ‘friend’ is better than being nothing to her at all.

Oh it hurts alright. More than being in punched in the balls, but hey she did that to me too.

We didn’t speak for the whole trip back. I just couldn’t.
I pretended to be asleep while I saw her plug in her headphones into her ears in the row in front of me on the plane.  I swear I heard her blasting the All American Rejects’ Dirty little secret.

What did I do wrong? Just when I thought I had my chance, she turns around and decides to back the hell away.

I spent the whole flight thinking about when the exact moment was, that she decided she’d made a mistake with ‘us.’

The first time was hard enough: I’ve replayed that scene at the party over and over again in my mind. Ava looking at me in a way I’d only dreamed of, her whisper for me to make a move. Me freaking out because the girl I was in love with was actually asking me to kiss her. Me not moving because I wasn’t sure if this was real. Me internally freaking out even more when she kissed me. My brain going into overdrive and shock resulting in the paralysis of my entire body.

Great.

Then came the ‘best’ part; Ava asking me if we could pretend it never happened.

How could I EVER forget what had happened?
I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. I’d had my chance, I failed to take it and Ava had changed her mind.

I don’t know whether she’d just wanted a casual hookup and then rejected me because was a disappointment.

What the heck! I don’t know the first thing about ‘casual’ let alone having much experience in hooking up with girls!

I can never be the type of guy that Ava would want. I’m not ‘bad,’ I’m not ‘cool’, I’m not ‘exciting,’ I’m not anything.

I’m just boring old Ryan.

And that jerk Grayson knew it too.

“Watch this Haywood,” he snickered as he raced ahead of me around the corner.
He was talking sleazily to Ava and they looked pretty cosy which made my blood boil. But what could I do? I had no grounds to beat the crap out of him just because he was talking to the girl that was once his, and would never be mine.

And then he KISSED her. He kissed her so aggressively, like he was trying to possess her or dominate her, and I nearly lost control as he looked at me over her shoulder and smirked with his eyes.

But then I felt a hand clasp around my wrist, giving it a small squeeze. It was Kim.
I didn’t even realise that she was standing next to me.

“Ryan, don’t. This isn’t you, and he is NOT worth it.” She said.

“Are they…?” I almost didn’t dare to ask.

“No. Ava is over him, trust me. He is just up to his no good tricks again.” She replied, her eyes narrowing as she glared at him.

“Kim, I –uh, can I tell you something? It has to do with Ava.” I asked hesitantly.

“I already know honeybee.” She smiled at me reassuringly. And I knew that she knew exactly what I meant.

“It’s a long road to what you’re searching for, and it won’t be easy because that’s just how she is. But I’m rooting for you prepster. You’re better for her than every single guy she’s dated combined. We just have to wait until she realises that herself.”

I had sincerely hoped that Kim was right as I headed into my next class. But I guess not.

I hate myself for putting so much faith into the wager that Kim had bet me just before Christmas; that if I didn’t give up and tried one more time, Ava would give me a real chance.

I got so desperate for that to be true that I told Ava that it would only be for 3 days, the 3 days of the trip, and that we could go back if she wanted to.

I guess that was my demise, since she took the escape route I hoped she would have forgotten about. I couldn’t sleep that last night after we were trapped in the basement. How could I forget about the things she made me feel, the sensations running through my body, the memories of holding her in my arms as she held me back too?

Evidently she could.

For 2 and a half out of the 3 days I was happier than I’d ever been in my whole life. I thought, that maybe for once I would be somebody’s number 1. And for a fleeting moment, I actually let myself believe that.

I was so sure before that Ava would never go for me, that I actually bet Kim $100. So when she caught me and Ava in the basement essentially half-naked, I needed to make sure that she knew I wasn’t just another one of those guys that only cared about getting into Ava’s pants (that technically remained on?). I didn’t care about the money aspect, but I just didn’t want to screw things up again and I knew Ava trusted Kim’s opinion. After getting to know her well, Kim really was a good judge of character, as well as a fiercely loyal friend.

"Geez babycakes you dont need my permission, I'm sure Ava wasn't making it easy for you!" She laughed at me when I ran out of the basement after her.

"I just, still, wait how did you know?" I thought Ava and I had been pretty secretive.

"Did y'all really think I wasn't going to come back and check on you guys after I 'went to bed' on that first night?” She replied, quirking an eyebrow at me.

“…err.” I knew I was blushing, I thought nobody else knew, “So I guess you won the wager-“

“Ryan I don’t want your money, but I just need to say I TOLD YOU SO!” She said hugging me excitedly.

Things went so sour from there.

The next morning when we were at the airport lounge after checking in, Kim was sitting with me watching the other’s bags while they went in search of food.

“Hey Peaches,” She said turning to me, “Please don’t be mad, but I overheard you guys last night.”

“…oh. Well your room was right next to mine so it’s not really your fault that you heard.” I said, I was glad that it was Kim and not one of the others, only because it would be too awkward to explain to them because they didn’t know the whole situation.

“But I don’t have any more idea than you as to why she made that decision.” She continued, compassion in her facial expression.

“I don’t want to lose her, not when I barely even had her in my arms,” I whispered, the painful tightening in my chest returning.

“I can’t tell you what you should do sweetpea, that’s entirely your choice and should be respected,” She told me, squeezing my arm reassuringly, “But you should know that you’ve become my-our friend too, and if you left our group we would all miss you. Our group just wouldn’t be the same without you.”

It felt so…warm, to have something to belong to, and people who treated you as an equal, people who would miss you if you one day just disappeared. I had all of these good friends now, and leaving to be away from Ava would mean having to leave them too.

As painful as it would be, I still wanted to be a part of this little…I guess we were a family. A family of friends that found each other, supported each other, and accepted each other wholeheartedly.

I would really need their help if I was going to be able to get through going to the Winter Formal with Ava.

After all, it was only 2 months away and I know, that that isn’t nearly enough time for me to get over her.

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Don't forget to COMMENT and VOTE if you like the story so far!
Next chapter is the Winter Formal, and what do you think is going to happen when our emotionally complicated(and sexually deprived) characters are forced to slow dance??
OOOOOHHHH, even I, am looking forward to the fireworks ;)
xx Cerise :)