We'd like to start this off by saying how truly disappointed we are in the number of entries we received and the number of tributes who chose to drop out. It was very disheartening to find only just over half of the entries in our inbox. Do you all truly want these games to continue? The lack of submissions just really makes it seem like you don't want to participate.We're not going to quit just yet, but please, please hand in your entries.

Note that as this was an odd round, each death/ballot subtracted half a point from the specified tribute's score.

Bonus Points:

The first entry, submitted only about an hour and a half after the task was posted, goes to Shadow Thantoes Morte! Congratulations- you will receive an extended feedback and .5 added to your score.

The 'Best Tumnus Battle' award has been awarded to Marcus Silverhand, for both a creative way to escape and Mr. Tumnus's odd but beautiful assortment of weapons/fighting techniques. .5 has been added to your score!

Congratulations to Rosella Van Carter for having the Most Convincing White Witch! The way you portrayed her was just incredibly... convincing. You will have .5 added to your score as well.

District 1 Male: Flame Pheonix Pirkas

Paella's Score: 6

Pluto's Score: 5.5

Feedback: A lot of Flame's dialogue near the beginning of the entry seemed more like it should have been internal thoughts instead of out loud. There were multiple punctuation errors, and numbers are typically written as words in literature instead of characters. There were also a few incomplete sentences and numerous spelling errors. You had a lot of room for description and could have elaborated more; one place I noticed was especially lacking was when Flame was surveying the arena. Instead of saying " well I'm guessing it's the cornucopia", try something like "my eyebrows narrowed as I saw the unusual structure, doubt in my initial assumption flickering in my mind." One other thing I noticed was that some of your paragraphs were very short- only two sentences long- when they could have been combined with others around it. Short paragraphs may also be a sign that you need to elaborate and add more details. I can see that you are capable of this, like in the sentence, "A loud scream escaped the boys lips and I walked away leaving the boy bleeding in a slush of bloody snow." Despite the punctuation errors, you paint a really good picture here. Again, I see potential in the following sentence, despite the spelling error; "The clomping of his hoofs became much more pronounced against the beautiful dark hardwood flooring." This level of description just needs to stay consistent throughout the entire entry.

Final Score: 5.75 (-1) = 4.75

District 1 Female: Ruby Grace Faberson

Paella's Score: 0

Pluto's Score: 0

Feedback: No entry received.

Final Score: 0 (-0.5) = -0.5

District 2 Male: Ares Finn

Paella's Score: 7.5

Pluto's Score: 8

Feedback: I find it very unique and difficult to write in present tense in third person, so I applaud you for being able to write it rather well. You misplaced a great number of commas and two apostrophes, along with 5-6 typos.You had a couple awkward sentences as well, like, "He wants to shake and beg to not do this, but he can't let down himself." If you read your entry out loud, it's easier to tell which sections don't roll off the tongue nicely. I also caught eight incomplete sentences- make sure you always have a noun and a verb that coincide. I was very intrigued by the way you portrayed Ares in this task, though, especially when he 'hit' the little girl. You're on the way to some real character development, and I can't wait to see more of that. You description also significantly improved from last task, and it really shone through when you were describing how cold Ares was. I would yet again like to see more emotion, though- you say Ares is nervous next to the White Witch, but don't go into any more depth. The end also seemed to be lacking emotion- what scar has the encounter left on Ares? It seems as though he's completely unaffected.

Final Score: 7.75

District 2 Female: Slate Welby

Paella's Score: 6.75

Pluto's Score: 6.25

Feedback: You had some incomplete sentences, punctuation errors, forgotten capitals, a few places where you put one word where another fit, but all the same, I do think this was a bit of an improvement from your other entries. Your beginning was intriguing, but I feel like you lost that same level of emotion/internal thinking as you continued on with the entry. You had some description, but I'm still looking for a lot more. Slate's first glance of Mr. Tumnus could have definitely been improved- instead of saying, "I turned around, looking for a fierce creature. But there was nothing in sight that would tear me apart. All there was was a strange hooded man covered in a shaggy brown coat of fur and a terribly bright red scarf.", try something that better paints the picture; avoid telling the reader Mr. Tumnus is there, and instead show Slate's reaction as her eyes land on the strange creature. For example, say, "My eyes darted warily from tree to tree, scanning for movement in the snow. The area directly in front of me offers no clues to the being who created the noise. Heart beating in my ears, I turned around to glance behind me, sure I would be ambushed from behind. Fear makes up every particle of my being, nervous sweat drenching my hands. But my terror twisted into only confusion as my glance revealed a pair of hooves sunken into the snow..." and so on. I'm looking for you to stretch the moment out, really give me more of Slate's emotions and describe the scene. Your ending also seemed a bit incomplete.

Final Score: 6.5

District 3 Male: Conn Sephra

Two strikes; eliminated.

District 3 Female: Rosella Van Carter

Paella's Score: 10.5

Pluto's Score: 10

Feedback: Wow. I really can't say much more than that right now. I loved that entry- the description was fantastic, the emotions powerful, the characterization flawless. I'm honestly not sure why you weren't confident in this, because it was beautiful. Unlike a lot of others in which I make comments as I go along and catch mistakes, I was so captivated with this entry that I didn't stop. I did notice one slightly awkward use of a semicolon, but that's all punctuation/grammar/spelling-wise. The White Witch was portrayed beautifully, and my only comment would be that you slipped slightly with your description once you moved into the dialogue with her. Still, wow.

Final Score: 10.25 (+0.5) (-0.5) = 10.25

District 4 Male: Kanai Lathan

Paella's Score: 8.75

Pluto's Score: 9.25

Feedback: I'm not sure what, but something in your entry just seemed to be missing. It was a good piece, but not quite blow-my-mind good. I felt like you had a lot of action, and although you had a little bit of description, your entry still didn't feel terribly detailed. It was straightforward, and although that can work sometimes, I'm not sure it did here. The beginning seemed a bit rushed to me, and I would have loved to hear more of Kanai's internal thinking. However, I did like his interactions with the other characters, especially Ruby Grace.

Final Score: 9 (-1) = 8

District 4 Female: Katelyn "Kate" Dodger

Paella's Score: 10

Pluto's Score: 10

Feedback: Used automatic 10.

Final Score: 10 (-2.5/2 = -1.25) = 8.75

District 5 Male: Montgomery 'Monty' Bean

Paella's Score: 6.25

Pluto's Score: 6.75

Feedback: Used extension.

Final Score: 6.5 (-0.5) = 6

District 5 Female: Esther Tehnos

Paella's Score: 9.75

Pluto's Score: 9.25

Feedback: Your beginning was very impressive, and I loved the description you maintained throughout the entry- it was absolutely stunning. However, I do feel like Esther's encounter with the White Witch was a tad rushed, and I was looking for slightly more emotion. What you had, though, just about blew me away, so keep up the good work!

Final Score: 9.5 (-2) = 7.5

District 6 Male: Devin Eifa Alvah

Paella's Score: 4

Pluto's Score: 3.5

Feedback: The typo in the first sentence really started you off on a bad note, and your entry was incredibly short. We had recommended including either the White Witch or Mr. Tumnus, neither of which you did, which is partially why you scored so low- you were missing so much of the entry, despite that it was optional to include them. We set this task up for a much longer entry than you provided. You had a lot of incomplete sentences and punctuation errors, and your entry wasn't very descriptive- I've already told you what I'm looking for in Flame's feedback, so just reference there.

Final Score: 3.75 (-0.5) = 3.25

District 6 Female: Ashlyn Roxen

Paella's Score: 7.25

Pluto's Score: 6.75

Feedback: No note provided.

Final Score: 7

District 7 Male: Theo Easton

Dropped out.

District 7 Female: Aspen Kinsley

Paella's Score: 10

Pluto's Score: 10

Feedback: Used automatic 10.

Final Score: 10 (-3) = 7

District 8 Male: Syne Nighes

Dropped out.

District 8 Female: Rii

Dropped out.

District 9 Male: Giles Mazer

Dropped out.

District 9 Female: Eliza Clarkie

Paella's Score: 0

Pluto's Score: 0

Feedback: No entry received.

Final Score: 0 (-0.5) = -0.5

District 10 Female: Arura Bay Akpofure

Two strikes; eliminated.

District 11 Male: Shadow Thantoes Morte

Paella's Score: 7

Pluto's Score: 6.5

Feedback: Despite that it was an intriguing way to begin your entry, the punctuation error in the dialogue made it considerably less effective. I also noticed other punctuation errors in the entry, along with misplaced capital letters. There were a few places where you had two different characters speak on the same line, where the dialogue should have been on two separate lines. Additionally, numbers are usually written as words and not characters in quality literature. There were numerous spelling errors throughout the entry- even if you can't spell some words, there are spell checkers on the internet that are more than easy to access that can fix those. Also, I'd recommend learning the difference between homophones- at the end of your first paragraph, you confused 'flee' with 'flea'. On to the style- you write very casually, it seems. Your descriptions are very simple, and I would reference a thesaurus or the internet to find more descriptive adjectives and verbs that really help the reader see the scenario or even just the thoughts inside your tribute's mind. For example, one place where you definitely could have improved was when you said, "Well I guess it's not as stupid as I thought". This would have improved considerably had you said something more like, "My dismissive thoughts suddenly seemed absurd as my eyes landed on the environment of the arena, and the coat revealed itself to be all too necessary." It was also a bit bland when you said, "Slowly I got in the sleigh." Using a verb such as 'clambered' or even 'climbed' would help the reader better see the scene. You also could have elaborated where you didn't multiple times in the entry- for example, the fur coat. How does it feel on Shadow? However, I can see you have the ability to elaborate more, like in the sentence, "I gripped my coat tighter around me trying to block out the frigid air." This was definitely a step up from your normal writing, excluding the missing comma. Your entry progressively improved once the action started, and your description of the white witch was impressive compared to what I've seen from you in the past. There was one sentence that confused me, though- when you said Shadow "quickly trudged" through the snow. Trudged basically means to walk slowly, so this phrase doesn't really make sense. I liked what you included of Shadow's emotions, but I was still looking for more. For example, when he was forced to join the white witch the sleigh, I would have liked to hear more about that fear, and then the entire scene where the white witch offers to cure Shadow's deafness. The dialogue of the white witch, however, was extremely well done, especially, "You have a lot of scars my son, on your heart and on your body. Stay and let me heal them." This was definitely effective. However, I think the quality of the entry deteriorated near the end, and I would have liked to hear more about Shadow debating what could have happened if he had taken up the offer of the white witch. Your ending struck me as rather incomplete and abrupt.

Final Score: 6.75 (+0.5) = 7.25

District 11 Female: Regan Twiyl

Dropped out.

District 12 Male: Marcus Silverhand

Paella's Score: 9

Pluto's Score: 9.5

Feedback: I really liked this entry! The substance you had was really good, and I love the description you included. However, I was still looking for more. Your paragraphs were also very short, a great number of them only one or two lines long. This is typically a sign that you either need to combine fragments or stretch out the moment. There were also multiple messups with your commas. Other than those little things, your entry was great, and I'm liking Marcus more and more!

Final Score: 9.25 (+0.5) (-1.5)= 8.25

District 13 Male: Nick Eckhart

Two strikes; eliminated.

District 13 Female: Xavi Uriendah Liason

Paella's Score: 7

Pluto's Score: 6.5

Feedback: As I've said to many others, numbers are typically written out as words in formal writing, not characters. You had a couple misplaced capital letters and commas. The paragraphs near the beginning, especially, had great description, and I see a lot of potential in your writing, but they were very short. This is usually a sign that you either need to combine them or stretch out the moment, both of which I think you could have done. During the dialogue with the White Witch, you missed a lot of periods at the end of your sentences, and the format was very repetitive. Your paragraphs got especially short. Another thing your entry was really lacking was Xavi's emotions and internal thoughts. I would have loved to see more of them weaved into the writing, especially the dialogue. Additionally, I would appreciate if you were more realistic with the things Xavi knows and the items she receives. We only granted something valuable to one tribute as a sponsorship gift, so your tribute wouldn't have the means to bribe the White Witch. Additionally, Xavi said, "After you take me to the door." Your tribute wouldn't know about the door; they were supposed to stumble upon it as they wandered through the forest. Even if she has read books, the White Witch wouldn't know about the door... We will not subtract points for these deviations from the task this round, but if they persist, you may be facing some consequences.

Final Score: 6.75 (-0.5) = 6.25

Capital Male: Kolya

Paella's Score: 4.25

Pluto's Score: 3.75

Feedback: Your entry was incredibly short, and you could have drawn out all the moments substantially more. It seemed very rushed; the paragraphs were mostly 2-3 sentences long, which is usually a sign that you either need to combine paragraphs or add more details, both of which I would recommend. You had multiple mistakes concerning commas. There was very little description- many examples of what I'm looking for are found amongst the feedback for other tributes.

Final Score: 4

Capital Female: Nadia

Paella's Score: 5

Pluto's Score: 5.5

Feedback: You had very few errors in punctuation, which I appreciated, though there was one period where a question mark should have been. I would have liked to see a considerably greater amount of description in the entry, examples of which are seen throughout other feedbacks. I think there was a lot you could have added to this entry, even though it was longer than your other- you still had over 1000 words you could have used.

Final Score: 5.25 (-1) = 4.25