I stared at him. I couldn't move...I couldn't talk. I just...stared. He stared back though. Patient as ever. It had been too long since someone spoke, so I tried saying something.

"I...I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything."

"But....you...and..."

"Shh shh...it's okay, I'm not going to tell anyone."

"There isn't anything to tell Jimin." I said annoyed at this point. I moved to get off the bed but he moved with me holding on to my hips. He turned me around and pulled me into his lap so I was straddling him.

His eyes caught mine and I couldn't look away.

Tell him.

"No."

"'No' what baby?" He asked his eyes pleading with mine.

Tell him now.

"I don't want to."

"What don't you want to do? Quinn...you can trust me."

Just tell him...he deserves to know.

"But I'm scared." I said tearing up. "I don't want to lose him." I said letting the tears fall. I played with his hair not looking him in the eyes and he reached up grabbing my wrists.

"Who are you talking to, baby?" he said in the softest voice.

TELL HIM!

"Her!" I shouted.

He cupped my face and somehow managed to get me closer. "Who is she baby? Who?"

"She's....she's not real."

"She's real to you." He whispered raking his hands through my hair trying to comfort me. "She's real to you, that's all that matters. Who is she?"

I started to sob, this was so strange. I had literally NEVER talked about this...I didn't ever want to talk about this. But sure enough...Jimin pulled it out of me.

"Why are you able to do this to me?" I sobbed into his neck.

"Do what?"

"Make me do things against my better judgment...make me do thing's I know I shouldn't. Make me talk when I don't want to. How do you do this?!"

He chuckled a little as he stroked my hair softly. "Because you love me."

I started to sob even harder. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that but after a while my sobs turned to sniffles and my sniffled turned to deep breathing. I was about to fall asleep when...

Tell him the truth.

"Fuck." I whispered.

"What is it?" he asked pushing me up to face him. "What?"

"I don't want to say it out loud." I mumbled.

"Have you ever said it out loud?"

"No."

He nodded. "What are you scared of?"

"That I'll get my liscence taken away."

"I told you no one will find out about us-"

But I didn't let him finish. I kissed him softly on his lips and gave him a sad smile. "Not about that." I took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes.

Just say it...you will feel better.

"I don't want to say it out loud because if anyone were to know...they would take my life away. I spent so long in medical school...I worked so hard and if...if I say it out loud it will be real. It...it will ruin my life."

"Not if you tell me...you just have to tell me. No one else...you can trust me."

This time he held my face sturdy in his hands not letting me look away. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

"Every day I fight the voice inside my head...she only surfaced once...but she's there."

When I opened my eyes I saw relief in Jimin's eyes along with a bit of fear.

"Like...an alter?"

I nodded. And he nodded with me.

"She comes out when I'm stressed...when I struggle with things."

"So...our relationship has..."

I nodded. It didn't need to be said. I knew and now he knew, that another reason I didn't want to get involved with him was because I knew it would weaken the barrier I built. And here I am...straddling the man I love who happens to be my patient, confessing the one thing I never wanted anyone to know.

"I don't know what to do." I whispered tears pooling in my eyes.

He pulled his hands from my face allowing his thumbs to catch and dry away the falling tears. "I know what we are going to do."

"You do?"

"Yes...you are going to double my prescription. You are going to make a note that the medication is helping but that I started to struggle again and you felt it necessary to double the dosage to help." He took a deep breath and held me close. "Then every morning when I take my medication you will take it as well. We will not tell anyone about this. Not even the guys. No one needs to know but us. We are in this together."

"Why do you want to help me so much."

He straightend in his spot holding me tightly. "Why? Are you kidding me? You saved my life! You did everything for me and for the 6 others that were trapped in this house. And I love you. I would do anything...and I mean anything to protect you. Do you hear me?"

I nodded a little intimidated by his intensity. "Thank you." I choked out before more tears fell.

He pulled my face to his neck and held me tight rocking me back and forth.

"This will just be between us...just us."

You have to let him fuck me before you do this...cuz holy shit I can already feel it.

I giggled at that.

"What's funny?" Jimin asked letting me lean up.

"Ummm...she wants me to let you fuck her before I start taking the medication."

He laughs. "I'll fuck you and she can come along for the ride if she wants but I only want you. Only you."

Damn it. Fine...but do it now.

I pressed my lips against his in a desperate kiss. His tongue flicked against mine and I gripped the roots of his hair holding him firm to me. After a moment or two he rolled us so that my back was pinned against the mattress.

"Ready?" he asked in a teasing tone As he slipped his hand down the front of my shorts.

YES!

I giggled and nodded.

That night we were gasping for breath and singing our pleasures to each other. It was a good night for us, playful and exhausting. But when the morning came we sat in my office I wrote out the new prescription and made the new notes.

"You know that I have to submit this to your employer right? They have to know that you are...upping your dosage."

"I know."

"I don't know if it will change anything for you...your contract."

"I don't care."

"Are you sure?" I whipserd.

"I've never been so sure of anything."

I nodded not wanting to press the matter and once the notes were saved I pulled out more of the medication administering one pill for him...and then one for myself. He took his first and then offered his water to me. It took me a minute to register what I was actually doing...not only was I technically taking advantage of one of my patirnts, I was taking advantage of the medication I helped make.

You've helped so many people...just take it.

I looked up to Jimin and he knelt down next to me.

"I know what you're thinking...the eithical and moral inner self is starting to make you second guess this...but you have to remember that a lost of people take advantage of their power to manipulate and hurt other people. You are doing it to try to better yourself...in my opinion there is nothing wrong with that." He took a deep breath. "Take it."

I looked down to the pill in the palm of my hand forcing all hesitation to disappear. I popped it in my mouth throwing my head back and taking a few sips of water. When I was done I looked at Jimin's smiling face and leaned down to kiss him.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being here for me."

"I will always be here for you."