Tucking out the red rose from her hair Reyna placed it on the polished vanity table.

Most of the petals of the red rose were missing, someone had stolen the essence of the rose from it.

A small smile stretched on her red colored lips knowing pretty well, the thief was her six months old son, Ahren.

In the middle of a royal wedding her earrings and her long hair were his only way of entertainment.

His little fingers would always get stuck in her dark hair. He loves his mother's long hair, he loves it when she embellishes herself.

Suddenly a loud scream full of pain and hurt came, yanking Reyna out of her sweet thoughts.

Her heart felt heavy, a sudden fear crawling in her. Her eyes snapped towards the direction from where the sound came.

Second floor..Izan's room.

Raising on her feet she was ready to run out of her room and reach the second floor but another sound of cry stopped her.

Her son, Ahren, was crying.

She turned on her feet, his loud cries were piercing her heart. Reyna can endure anything but not her son's cries.

Running to his cot she took the little child in her arms,“Shhh ren I am here darling,” she cooed, wiping the fat tears from his cheeks. The little bundle of cuteness sniffled with his pouty lips quivering.

Absence of his mother was one of his greatest fears. The little man finds it hard to breathe in absence of his mumma's soft fragrance.

Placing a soft kiss on his forehead Reyna brought him close to her chest. With him in her arms she walked to and fro in the room, singing a sweet lullaby to him she tried to send him to the world of slumber once again.

Her sweet voice, mixed in honey, broke the barrier of thick walls and traveled to where it was needed the most.

Clover closed her eyes and succumbed to the sweet voice, forgetting about the man sucking her neck like a wild animal.

Hearing Reyna's song, Clover felt like her mother had come down from heaven and was humming a lullaby to her. It gave her a hope of peaceful sleep. The only hope she needed.

Reyna's voice traveled more, erasing all the distance it reached to Zehra's ears who was looking at the round moon as if her world resided in the moon.

Reyna's voice was magical, soothing everyone's pain.

Ahren stopped crying and stared at his mother with his twinkling eyes which were begging him to sleep but he was loving the sight of his mother.

She was just so beautiful. Most beautiful person in the entire world.

It's not like he has seen the whole world but among the many faces he has seen, his mother's face has his heart and soul.

“Soja beta,” Reyna whispered with a sweet smile, her soft finger caressing his pouty lips making him smile in return.

(Sleep baby)

Finally giving up to his sleep Ahren slept, closing his eyes. Reyna pressed her lips to Ahren's forehead and this time laid him on the center of bed, just near to his father.

His father who never spared a glance to his wife nor to his son.

His father who was too blind to see his mother's beauty that Ahren loves the most.

His father who was nothing but a stone to everyone with no feelings no smile no love and no care.

A living stone. Who takes breaths, eats, works but never cares, never loves.

Sitting on the side of the grand bed Reyna gazed at that handsome face without any fear of getting caught by him.

She knew he was so immersed in his work that he would never even spare her a glance even after knowing that her big eyes were set on him.

It was nothing but a regular thing for Nirvana.

Women's eyes roam to his chiseled face every now and then.

Among all the Rajput men he was the most handsome one and that was what made him the most cherished sight for any woman's eyes.

Even now working on his laptop with no shirt on his upper body he was giving Reyna a firm proof that whenever they go out together why everyone's more precisely women's eyes roam there way, more particularly his way.

Nirvana could feel her emotionless stare on him. He could feel it every night. It has become their routine now, him working till late in the night and her staring at him without any fear. 

However, one thing was different in Reyna. Like every other woman her eyes never carried that attraction, that desire for him.. her eyes were mostly empty.

They carry nothing, no hate or disgust. Just empty.

She looks at him like he was her only hope and the only destroyer of all her hope.

There must be something more in her eyes for him but he never gave fuck to meet her gaze and read it aloud.

This marriage was nothing but a play for them, a play that he and she had to act in front of the world and they really played it very well.

“I know I am a handsome sight for a mediocre, unpretty lady like you.. but that does not give you a right to stare at me like a creep,” he said, his tone neutral, completely blank as his eyes which were set on the laptop screen.

In all these nights..this night became a little more special. Because for the first time Nirvana said a word to Reyna when she was shamelessly staring at him.. more than only a word in that matter.

Reyna's lips tucked upwards in a small smirk and that voice which could sooth a dead soul taunted the King rather proudly,“You have mistaken Mr. I have no interest in an old man like you,” she tsked, brutally before turning her eyes to her son.

Nirvana sucked in a deep breath. Her words bruised his ego.

His fist tightened and a vein flicked on his forehead.

A part of him dared him to turn his gaze to her and set her under his heated furious gaze however the bigger part of him decided to not give a damn about her.

Ignoring her taunting remark he turned his attention to the work in hand.

He can not waste his time on an unworthy girl like Reyna.

Arranging the pink blanket and pillows around Ahren's little figure Reyna hummed lovingly in her mother tongue,“Oh Chanda mama aare aawa paare aawa nadiya kinare aawa.. sona ke katoriya mein doodh bhaat lai lawaaa, babua ka munhwa mein ghutoo…o.”

Singing softly near Ahren's mouth she plucked a soft kiss from his little pouty lips before giving a blank glance at her namesake husband.

He was still unbothered to her and her son.

Something never changes, not like she wanted to change it.

Pressing her lips together in a line Reyna turned on her feet and walked out of the room.

Change… she was thinking about change !

A girl who got married to a man who was more than ten years older than her, a man whom she never met before in her life, a man because of whom she had to forget all of her dreams and she was thinking about change.

She once had every power in her hand to change everything but she didn't.

And now she was thinking about change like now she could change anything.

At the age of twenty one when most of them dream of having a dream, pursuing a dream, dream of going anywhere freely and enjoying their time with friends, she was here, wearing a heavy red saree and gold jewellery which she could not even carry effortlessly.

At the age of 21, she was a wife and an eldest daughter in law, a sister in law, a queen and most importantly a mother.

She would not have been here in this big house with so many responsibilities and relationships. Only if she would have changed her mind on the day when she first saw him.

“I am telling you Monika. Mr. Mishra is definitely going to fail me..I don't know what personal khunnas (enmity) he has with me. Last time he deliberately did not mark my two ten marks questions. Thank God I gave the papers to reevaluate otherwise I was losing my 20 marks. Only if I could kill Mishra he would have died by now,” Reyna, who was complaining about her hindi teacher to her best friend Monika, was unaware of the guest sitting in the living room as she entered her home.

Suddenly she stopped her rambling feeling the darkness instead of that light and happy atmosphere in her house.

How can she feel the light of happiness when the king of darkness himself has grazed her door.

Looking ahead she saw him for the very  first time. Her feet stopped and her lips sealed together in a line. Her best friend who until now was holding her hand jerked her hand out and ran out of her home.

The reason was darkness lighting his eyes.. not a word and he was scaring everyone around him.

Even the men all tall and strong looking, most probably his henchmen were looking down in fear of this great man.

Her mother was shivering, holding the hand of her father who was cowering in fear at a corner in his own house.

But Reyna.. She was fearless. Not even a drop of fear emerged in her almond shaped eyes. Her tall frame was straight, never slouching back in nervousness or fear.

If the man was screaming power then Reyna was oozing complete confidence.

That day also her eyes were blank for him, no emotions surfaced in her eyes as she asked him,“Who are you and what do you want ?”

The man was unknown to her, she was seeing him for the first time. But she knew this man was the man of power who could snap her neck with a single move or shoot a bullet right in her mouth with a gun he was holding in his hand; however,Reyna was not the one who backed down.

She was not a queen but she definitely was a leader.

His lips tucked upwards in a dark sinful smirk making everyone shiver at its evilness. For the very first time even Reyna shivered in slight fear but she did not let anyone see it.

However Nirvana saw it.

His evil smirk widened. She was entertaining to him, her facade of confidence was exciting him. After a long time Nirvana was meeting someone who do not easily flinch by his presence and he was fucking loving this.

Like a tiger raising to hunt down another tiger and chase him down out of his territory Nirvana raised from the old torned sofa which was until now looking like a great throne only because he was sitting on it.

With his hunting eyes set on the deep circle of her confident eyes he sauntered to her with one hand tucked to his pants pocket and the other one playing with the gun.

Nirvana stood before her leaving not even a slightest gap of two inches..he was assuming she would take a step back but in contrast she was rooted to her place.

Nirvana's smirk widened at that.

Her small pointy tip of her nose collided with his broad chest but Reyna did not flinch.. his masculine smell full of cigarettes and coffee filled her nose. She didn't inhale it deeply nor did she let go of it.

“I want you Miss Reyna Paswan,” he breathed on her raven curls making them fly back. 

Reyna closed her eyes at the feeling of his hot breath on her head and then ever so slowly she looked up at him, meeting his eyes she understood what everything was about.

He was one of those random goons who liked a girl only by one sight and then wanted her to satisfy their desire for a night or two.

She misunderstood him as some random goon.

Only if Reyna knew how wrong she was.

Her eyes turned to her father. He was begging her with his eyes to not say anything which could hurt this man's ego.

He was the man of power..he could destroy their whole family if he wanted to.

The destruction of her family and her home was only dependent on Reyna's next few words.

Reyna again looked up at the tall man standing so close to her. His dark eyes were not wavering from her. He was looking at her as if he was reading her.

Reyna smirked..she was not an open book or worse a newspaper on the side of a book stall that any random man could read her. She knew how to hide her emotions well.

Even if she was feeling a slight fear right now, she will not let him see that.

Reyna's mother who was crying silently till now ran to her daughter knowing pretty well how her daughter was.“He wants to marry you, Reyna. Please say yes to him and go away from here. He said if we went against him then he would destroy your papa's business. If you don't marry him he will kill us, Reyna!” her mother was begging her, crying miserably.

Reyna pursed her lips at her mother's words. Not melting down a little by her mother's begging or her crying. She knew more than her daughter, her mother worries about business and reputation.

She turned her gaze to the men before her.

Creating a good distance between herself and the dominating man Reyna crossed her hands across her breasts and said rather nonchalantly,“I am sorry Mr. Whoever, whatever but I do not fancy to marry any old man.”

Her words left everyone stunned.

Her parents gasped at her words while Nirvana narrowed his eyes at her.

“Reyna..” her father ran to her, holding her elbow he tried to stop her from saying anything more reckless.

“Reyna, don't speak like that beta (child). Look at him, he is so handsome, so rich you will be happy with him and what about age beta. Age is just a number.” Her mother tried to coax her sweetly.

Deep down she knew it was a win-win situation for everyone. Reyna will be happy after marrying the king and this marriage will be beneficial for their business after all her daughter will become a queen of khashiq.

Reyna looked at her mother and with a sweet crispy smile and said,“Age is just a number..” glancing at the man before him she continued with a dead look,“then jail is just a room.”

Her words again left everyone stunned and Nirvana more furious.

That day everything changed.

Sometimes she finds herself thinking about all these changes.. Most of them summoned nothing but sadness to her life but one change stood out from all of them.

The change of her becoming a mother.

It was the most beautiful change of her life. Her heart boils in great agony only by the thought of not having her Ahren in her life.

He was her everything. He will be her everything.

She doesn't care if her husband doesn't love her, does not care for her or worse does not respect her. Until the time she has her Ahren she doesn't care about any other thing.

Entering the kitchen Reyna opened the freeze and looked for something to eat. She has not eaten anything since this morning.

Being an eldest daughter in law and on top of that the queen of the grand and royal city of khashiq there were so many responsibilities on her shoulders.

Not a single leaf of khashiq and this house of Rajputs could shake without her order.

This twenty one year old was not only a mother of a small toddler but in the eyes of her subjects she was their mother too who was equal to their goddess.

And the goddess was supposed to feed each of her children even if in the process she forgets her own hunger.

In the worry of not letting even a single person get back to their home empty stomach from the sudden yet grand marriage of Izan Rajput she forgot to feed herself. The little child stuck to her hips like a little koala was also another reason for her not taking a breath of relaxation and sitting and eating in peace.

Swirling her gaze around all the things in the freeze she searched for her favourites.

Gulab Jamuns.

Her eyes sparkled finding the delicious round syrupy sweet balls.

Taking it out from the freeze she took them in a one big bowl and with a spoon in her hand she sat down on the round dining table in the kitchen to gobble up all the sweet balls one by one.

Reyna raised her spoon to dig in the sweet dish but going against herself she picked the GulabJamun with her finger and thumb.

She was about to put the round syrupy sweetness in her mouth but a heart breaking sound came stopping her in the middle.

It was the cry of her baby boy.

Reyna dropped the sweet dish in the bowl and raised on her feet to again run to her Ahren.

“Stop.”

Her subconscious yelled and Reyna stopped in her track.

“He is with his father. His father will take care of him. Nirvana is there to wipe Ahren's tears.”

Placing a rock over her heart Reyna stood there in the hope that her Ahren will stop crying. His father will take him in his arms and will wipe his tears.

Her stone of a husband will feel his heart crushing at the sound of his son's cry and rain his teary face with kisses.

However nothing happened.

Ahren kept crying and crying and crying. Reyna's heart crushed by only the dim sounds of his crying but his father..he felt nothing.

Not able to control herself anymore, Reyna ran to her son, forgetting about her favourite food and her empty stomach. Nothing was and is more important than her child for a mother.

Her eyes swarmed with fearful tears when opening the door she found Ahren's small body hanging on the very end of the bed with his little legs entangled to some blankets and his head towards the floor.

He was crying loudly and was only a foot away from falling on the floor.

“Ahren!!” Reyna screamed and ran to her son.

Taking her son in her arms she saved him from touching the floor. She glued his little body to her chest.

“It's okay mera beta mumma aa gyi na ab..mumma hai paas main,” wiping his tears she cooed to her son who was not stopping crying a bit.

(It's okay my baby mumma has come...mumma is near you..)

Ahren nestled his face to his mother's chest and cried his heart out. His heart and mind was full of pain and fear, especially the fear.

He was scared when he opened his eyes and could not find his mother near him.

He was angry with her for leaving him but he was also scared. So so scared, the little baby's face was all red and teary and it was breaking his mother's heart so much.

But his father..his father was still unaffected.

Totally unfazed.

As if there was not a baby..his own baby crying his heart out in this big room.

As if he was not caring about those tears which were gliding down Reyna's eyes.

When her Ahren did not stop crying even when she cooed tens of love words to him Reyna snapped her eyes to her husband.

Anger blazed in her veins turning her eyes to complete red... furious red.

“Are you blind!” she yelled at the man who was still working on his laptop unaffected by everything.

Nirvana's fingers stopped typing in the middle. Closing his eyes he inhaled sharply before shutting his laptop and snapping his dangerous eyes to her,“Mind your tone Reyna,” he growled in a dark tone.

“My tone! What about you Nirvana,” Reyna yelled in anger,“What kind of father are you? Your son was about to fall to the ground and you did nothing. Ahren was about to get hurt," she looked at him with utter disgust and shock as she gritted out the words.

“But he is not hurt. He is fine and as a mother it is your responsibility to take care of him. Don't put the blame of your carelessness on me,” Nirvana said like he was not at fault at all.

Reyna looked at him with nothing but hatred,“My carelessness,”Reyna whispered, shaking her head lightly, “I look after my Ahren in every minute of the day. He will always be my first priority even before you or me. But what about you hn? What about your responsibilities as his father...how could you-” before she could say another word Nirvana cut her in between.

“He is not my son!!” he snarled, his face hardened like a rock.

“He is not my son," he repeated his words, glaring disgustingly at the little human being latched to her chest.

Ahren whimpered as if he was understanding what his father was saying.

Reyna gritted her teeth in deep fury, she was shaking in her place and glaring at her namesake husband who, like a robot, got up from the bed and now in the middle of the night was getting ready to go out.

She stared at him with nothing but anger and hate as he wore the dark blazer over his white shirt,“Where are you going ? To meet your lover or your slut ?" Reyna snarled.

There was no lover of him neither a slut.

She said what came in her mind out of sheer hate.

Nirvana's eyes sharpened and from inside he boiled in fury however other than his eyes nothing showed his true emotions and from outside he was as cold as ice.

Clasping the silver Rolex watch around his right wrist he looked at her through the mirror and spoke rather proudly,“Yes I am. Why do you care ? You are nothing to me,” his dark eyes shimmered with mirth. Lips tilted into a mocking smirk as he pronounced the words.

Reyna smiled painfully. Why would she care..she was nothing to him. Not his wife, not his life partner, not the mother of his child…she was nothing to him.

“Alright I am nothing to you. Don't care for me but Ahren," she looked down at the little baby who was looking back at her with his big rouneyes..“Ahren is your baby. He is your flesh and blood. You have to care for him, love him and save him whenever he is about to fall in life.”

“He is not my flesh and blood!” Nirvana shouted loudly, forgetting about all his don't give a fuck attitude.

Both Reyna and Ahren flinched at his loud voice.

Ahren started crying uncontrollably while Reyna whispered in a broken voice,“He is.. he is your baby, your flesh and blood. Stop hating him, Nirvana. Stop hating him..” the words died in her throat.

She knew, he knew, everyone in this house knew Ahren does not deserve this hate from his father.

He is the purest soul in the world of Khashiq.

Still he gets nothing but loath from his own father.

Nirvana did not have to get any words of proof from Reyna. He knew Ahren was his flesh and blood but that does not mean he will love him.

To be very honest more than Reyna, Ahren is a burden for him. He hates that boy.

Her words didn't affect Nirvana. He was still standing there tall not feeling a drop of love for his own son.

Reyna shook her head with a painful smile and looked down at her Ahren,“Mujhe maaf karde beta..main tujhko tere papa ki nafrat se nahi bacha saki.. mujhe maaf karde,” Reyna whispered begging to her son who was looking at her with his own eyes filled with tears.

(Please forgive me baby..I could not protect you from your father's hatred.. please forgive me.)

Wiping his fat tears she sat on the side of the bed and opened the hooks of her blouse. Reyna latched Ahren's mouth to her breast.She knew her baby was hungry. Little Ahren sighed, closing his eyes as his mumma breastfeed him.

For a long minute Nirvana stood there silently and watched her feeding his son. His gaze was moving from her teary face to Ahren's sleeping face again and again.

Reyna sat silently looking at her son with only love in her eyes. She was unbothered by Nirvana's eyes on her.

Looking down at the small baby in her arms she was only saying one thing.

Only you are my world. For only you I am tolerating everything and will keep tolerating everything. You don't have to worry beta.. your mother is here and she will always be with you.

(Baby)

Slowly Ahren went into a deep sleep. Reyna unlatched his mouth from her breast and laid him securely in the center of bed. After arranging pillows and blankets nicely around his tiny body she took care of her clothes.

While closing the hooks of her blouse Reyna knew Nirvana's eyes were only on her but she did pay him any attention.

After taking care of her clothes she snapped her gaze to him and he looked elsewhere.

“If you are saying he is not your flesh and blood then it's alright. But remember one thing you are losing all your right of claiming him your son in future,”Reyna whispered blankly looking dead in his eyes. 

Nirvana stared at her silently for a long minute..lots of memories, bitter and sweet passing through his mind.

Reyna sat on the bed silently, digging her fingers on her palm. Something was changing within her..the hour of the night which she loathes the most was coming back.

She was controlling herself as that betraying voice again started howling inside her. She gritted her teeth together and sealed her lips tight.

Stop it Reyna stop it.

Giving one last look at his namesake wife Nirvana was ready to go out of the room. He was about to open the door when suddenly her two arms encircled his torso, stopping him.

His lips tilted upside in a victorious smirk.

She lost.

Like every other night.

Reyna hated herself for doing this but the desire burning inside her betrayed her. 

She wanted to hate this man, not hug him.

She wanted to give a harsh slap on his face, not place a kiss on his back.

She wanted to tell him how much he disgusts her.

But instead she whispered against his back,“I need you now.”

Every other night. Every fucking other night. These words of hers boost his ego.

No matter what he does, what he says. No matter how careless he was for her and her son but like a shameless woman every other night she begs him to touch her.

Turning around he looked down at her. There was again that red lust swirling in her big eyes.

The hairs of her neck were again raising in goosebumps of arousal.

Her lips tinted in red were again inviting him to suck them.

Like every other night he again took a step towards her and she took a step back until she did not collide with the bed and ended up bouncing on their marital mattress.

Like every other night Ahren winced lightly in his sleep but did not open his eyes.

Like every other night Nirvana came over her, hiding her completely underneath him.

Like every other night her eyes swam with desire as well as tears.

Tears of pain, tears of self loath.

Tears of hate for him, hate for her.

“Go slow please and don't make much noise, my Ahren is sleeping,” she said blankly before closing her big eyes.

Without whispering a word Nirvana dipped his face in the corner of her neck and breathed in her smell deeply.

His hard body pressed against her softness, not leaving a slightest of gap.

Like every other night his hand ran to open the knot of petticoat and like every other night that single tear freed itself from Reyna's closed eyes.

And like every other night.

She lost again.

....