....

“Then go ahead and kill me,” for the first time, spoke clover, staring deep into Izan's eyes.

A look of shock passed through his features listening to those words from her mouth.

His hold on the gun trembled and he gulped silently.

Killing her seems like killing himself.

No matter how much he shows that he is angry with her he would never be able to kill her.

She was his soulmate and killing her meant killing his soul.

“No. I cannot do this,” he said, putting down his gun and shaking his head in disbelief that just a moment he was threatening to kill her.

Not knowing that he already has killed her.

“Then let her go,” said Reyna to him. His eyes snapped towards his sister in law, as her words registered in his mind his eyes widened and slowly his features displayed the anger that was burning him with it.

“No! I will never let her go,” he clenched out the words and pulled Clover to his arms, possessively.

“I am never letting my clovy go away from me,” he said, his arms tightening around her. It gave her pain instead of the sense of protection and she winced.

Looking down at her eyes he found fear in them. A fear for him.

He loved that fear, it was a lovely sight.

She was tempting him with the fear in her eyes, so tempting that he did not wait and pressed his lips against hers.

Clover gasped as his mouth crashed onto her that too in front of everyone in the family.

Her hands dangled on her sides as he poured his anger into the kiss. His hands holding her petite figure in his arms like a snake clutching around the thick vines.

She cried into the kiss as he became wilder with his display of affection. Darting his tongue into her mouth he loved her like a carnal animal. It was not the kiss of love but a kiss of lust and ownership.

He was marking her as his. Like she was not a human being but a thing to own.

Clover chuckled internally even in pain. He is cherishing her today but once he gets bored of her he himself will kick her out of his life.

She was getting closer to understanding what Izan Rajput, the third heir of Aryans, was.

Soon the sound of their lustful and forced kiss started to  bounce against the four walls of the room.

In the presence of such sensual sounds stood the other two couples.

Zehra's lips parted as the sounds of their kiss rang in her ears with her eyes locked with her betrayer.

She was not only deprived of love but also deprived of a sensual touch which every married woman dreams to feel.

Her fingers curled and crushed against her sides as she felt the coldness of the tip of the gun on her forehead and the hotness of his heavy eyes on her face.

“Do you remember?” His silent eyes asked the question.

She kept her eyes blank for a long minute contemplating if she should respond to him or not.

What he did to her made her believe that he does not deserve any response from her.

Response? He doesn't even deserve a single word from her but still to see what his next response will be she spoke through her eyes.

“Yes. I do,” the depth of her eyes reciprocated.

And like that Aks eyes turned into the shade of dark. Something flickering within them.

Something with which Zehra was familiar.

That night when they were about to lose their sanity and get lost in each other's arms. The heavy rain was pouring down from the sky.

It was the night of their farewell party. She was in a blue saree, her wavy hair cascading down till her waist, her eyes filled with Kohl and red coloring the petals of her lips.

He was mesmerized by her beauty. With a wet saree draped around her elegant figure she looked like a goddess of beauty. That night he wanted to make her his. She had that hope too. But somehow both of them controlled themselves before surrendering themselves to the slowly growing lust.

“Every cell of my being is ready to pounce you but not now Zehra…. You are special and you deserve a special night. For now control yourself love…I am promising you that I will make our first night memorable.”

Zehra's had a painful smile on her lips as she reimagined all those things and those words of his.

Indeed he made their first night memorable.

As the flashes of that night passed in front of his eyes Aks’s hold tightened on the gun..he felt himself oscillating between the Aks he was in past and the Aks he was now.

Zehra looked through his dilemma. She was about to whisper something when he suddenly held her wrist and pulled her out of the room.

It was his urgency as he dragged her along the empty lines of hallways.

Zehra did not say a word and let him do whatever he wanted.

She knew he was wounded by the weight of the past or maybe ashamed of it. 

…..

Izan parted away his lips from Clover. His eyes twinkled with real desire as he looked at the painting of blood that he created on her soft lips.

A smirk curled on his lips as he slowly wiped the blood from her lips and then the tears of her eyes.

Following his elder brother's footsteps he too went out of the room with his wife. Going to their bedroom to relish the lust that's growing in him.

Reyna and Nirvana were left alone in the room.

Nirvana was not expecting it but he saw tears brimming in her eyes which soon were tracing along her cheeks.

He had never seen her crying so openly. It was the first time.

“I hate myself,” the woman in pain whispered.

Nirvana's brows formed a crease as he retreated the gun from her forehead.

“Why do you hate yourself?” he asked, he wanted to be not bothered about her like every time but unknowingly the words left his mouth.

“I hate myself for wishing that you will take me in your arms like your brothers did with their wives,” snapping her tearful eyes as she gritted out the words.

Hating herself from growing arousal for him even though at that moment she wanted nothing but to hate him. Hate him entirely, without a give and take. But what about her body that was turning on by the mere sounds of kisses and intimacy was wanting only him. 

“I am feeling so weak Nirvana and it is all because of you. It is you because of whom I am standing here alone and crying like a fool,” she cried being so deep in self loath and a pain which could not be described in words.

She cried out without any curtains to what she was going through as the emotions felt too heavy on her delicate soul.

She was aroused even in between the intense and deciding point of her life.

She looked him into the eyes with nothing but hatred. Something no one in this entire world could do.

She grabbed his shirt's collar and pulled him to her height and shouted right on his face with nothing but shame and rage.

“I hate you Nirvana. After knowing that your hands are coloured in someone's blood I despise you with everything in my heart. My entire life I hated people who thrive on power by tormenting others. You are one of those people who kill just for fun and that makes me hate you more and more,”she yelled with tears streaming down her face. Her lips wobble like a baby when they cry but not once wobble her words or her truth.

“My heart is feeling nothing but hatred and disgust for you but I cannot control the part of me which just wants to jump on you like a hungry lioness and lick every inch of your skin…”

The truth came out in front of both of them who were left alone in the room.

She wanted him even though she hated him.

The weight of her truth was so much and her feet gave up and she dropped to her knees, sobbing bitterly in pain , hate and anger towards herself.

She cried, cried and cried thinking about the Reyna she was before meeting him and the Reyan she was now.

She does not carry a single amount of love for him still she wants to be with him, wrapped in his arms in presence of his fragrance always.

Nirvana saw the broken young girl who made herself look older by the heavy jewelry and makeup. She was crying bitterly over her fate.

Her fate is being his wife, the queen of this dark world called Khashiq, the queen of the real king of Khashiq.

He knew what she wanted at this moment. Though it was shameful for her, it was the perfect opportunity to get relief from his stress.

He placed his hands on her shoulder, the banarasi material of her blouse scratching against his palms.

“Reyna,” he spoke.

Reyna slowly looked up at him. A silent message in his eyes and Reyna knew she was again tearing herself in pieces.

Gulping down her emotions she wiped the tears of her eyes and slowly raised her trembling hands to undo his leather belt.

Keeping the belt on the nearby sofa she slowly opened the zip of his pants. Soon it was bunching around his ankles, above his polished shoes just like her respect was below his shoes.

The thought made him smirk.

Moving down the elastic of his underwear to his thighs she freed his cock which was raging rock hard. The veins popped out along the length of his cock.

Reyna looked him in the eyes once again and parted her lips to take his cock in her mouth.

“Oh Fuckkkkk!!” Nirvana cursed aloud as his cock was welcomed by the hotness of her mouth.

He looked down at her with burning eyes full of desire as she slowly started sucking him, in his words worshiping his cock with her eyes sealed with his.

Like her destiny sealed with his.

…

Zehra stared at the man sleeping on her bed with dead eyes.

He was on her bed while she was on one corner of the room, sitting on the floor with empty eyes and empty hands.

He was taking her name again and again in his sleep.

The name of his girlfriend.

Another arrow to her heart, not only when awake but even in his sleep he took her name.

She continued looking at his face, his moving lips and the name coming out of his mouth.

Myra. Myra. Myra.

He loves her so much.

His love for her makes Zehra question their past.

Why did he do what he did to her ? If he really did love her then why is he giving love to someone else when she is his wife now.

And if he really did not love her then why did he act like he loved her the most in the past?

There are too many questions but not even one answer.

Like always she thought of finding out what was the truth behind their so called relationship but then her father's words again rang in her ears.

“You have to give birth to the next heir of Aryans.”

She slowly raised her eyes and looked at the sleeping man again. What if in search of truth she forgets to fulfill her father's only wish.

No she cannot do it.

He has to give her a child no matter if there is true love in their relationship or not.

Not wanting to rot more with her thoughts she raised on her feet and walked out of their bedroom, it was one of those few nights when he was with her and that's what makes this night suffocating.

….

“Aaaaa hnn mumma mumma mumma I can't I can't handle this pain aaaaa,” Clover cried out, clutching her stomach as she saw the blood coming out of her vagina.

Izan had ripped her vagina.

She tried to sit up on her two feet but the burning on her vagina was not letting her move. She felt like she had no strength left in her body but still she attempted to come out of the bed and stand up.

“Oouch!!” she almost screamed in pain as more blood came out of her vagina.

Her face turned more and more red as she let out another round of sobs. Not even one of her sobs affecting the man deep in his sleep.

“Mumma take me with you it's so painful here I can't bear it anymore,” the poor girl cried as her naked self looked like a broken glass.

Wrapping her hands around her stomach she tried to stand up again one more time.

A loud gasp full of pain and agony came out of her mouth as she found her steps. Looking down at her vagina she grimaced and then again cried on her pathetic self.

Slowly she turned her eyes to the full length mirror of their room only to find a naked petite girl, weak, pathetic, full of marks and bruises and the biggest cry baby.

The last two words triggered her so much that she again ended up crying. She really was a cry baby. A fool and pathetic.

For the next half an hour she cried her eyes out and when she felt like no more tears were left to cry she finally gathered her strength and walked towards the bathroom.

Cleaning and putting a cream on her ripped vagina and new lust marks she came out of the bathroom with a night robe wrapped around her tiny frame.

Still small hiccups and sobs passed through her trembling lips but she carried herself strongly and approached the bed where her rapist was sleeping.

She was eager to get on the bed not because he was sleeping on it but because her lower body was just too much in pain.

“Water,” she said softly, opening the lid of the jug at the bedside only to find it empty.

Her lower lips trembled and she was ready to let out another cry but she controlled herself and wiping the betraying tears walked out of her bedroom in the slowest steps.

She will endure the burning pain but will never ask him to bring her a glass of water even when she will be on her dead bed.

…..

Reyna blankly stared at the ashen ceiling of their bedroom. Nirvana has just fallen asleep after fucking her like an animal.

He fell into sleep but here Reyna found herself slipping into depression as her desires got the better of her.

The warm tears soon bubbled in her eyes and cascaded out through the corner of her eyes.

She glanced at him. He was sleeping, completely unbothered about what she felt like. It's not like she lets him touch her because of love. It was never a reason. Even after knowing everything he was nonchalant about her and her kid since the beginning.

Her eyes suddenly moved to her son who was slowly opening his eyes in the middle of the night.

A frown appeared on her forehead and she turned to him, forgetting about her tears and what she was feeling.

“Kya hua Betu? ( What happened baby?”)

She asked and got a high pitched cry in response.

“Oh baby,” she said, taking him in her arms and cooing at him to stop his cries as she knew Nirvana would get extremely angry at Ahren if he disturbed his sleep.

Baby Ahren continued crying like he understood that his maa was not in the good frame of mind. She was upset and that made him upset.

Reyna thought he might be hungry as sometimes he craves milk in the middle of the night too.

She looked down at her boobs only to find marks of hickeys and bites.

She cannot breastfeed him in this condition when her boobs were already in pain.

She thought of feeding him infant formula tonight though he rejects that every time but she does not have any option left.

She placed the crying baby on the bed and wore her night robe. Picking him again in her arms she walked out of the room and went straight to the kitchen only to find Clover there.

“Clover.”

Clover flinched at the sudden voice making the jug in her hands drop.

Turning around in fright she found her normal breathing back when she saw it was only Reyna who called her.

“What are you doing here ?” Asked Reyna.

“Water.”

Clover answered back in a small whisper.

Reyna smiled at her timidness and entering the kitchen she said,“then go ahead and take the water love.”

Clover nodded, gulping nervously and filling a glass of water and gulping it down in one go.

Meanwhile, Reyna prepared baby formula for Ahren who was looking at everything with his eyes full of curiosity.

“Betu ka khana tyyar ho gya, ( Baby's food is ready)” Reyna exclaimed softly, and pressed a small kiss on his cheeks making him smile.

She shook the bottle well and placed the nipple to his mouth. But baby Ahren was fussy about formula food; he instantly moved his face away from the bottle nipple, grimacing at the only sight of it. 

“Pee lo na betu, (please drink this baby),Reyna begged her son to drink from the bottle but he was throwing tantrums in the middle of the night.

“Betu please,” but Ahren did not listen and started tapping his chubby hand on her breasts.

Reyna sighed helplessly and spoke,“Betu mumma thaki hai ( baby mumma is tired”)

Ahren did not listen to her started crying. Reyna was getting frustrated and in that frustration her own eyes filled with tears. Being a mother is not at all easy. It does get frustrating and tiring sometimes.

“Here,” she finally opened the knot of her robe and offered him to drink the milk.

In an instant his mouth was attached to her nipples. Reyna sighed, all of her frustration turning volatile no matter how tiring it is but being a mother is the one true blessing.

She smiled and kissed him on the forehead.

Turning around she found Clover standing in her place. She smiled at the shy girl and asked,“Are you hungry too”

To which Clover did not say a word.

“Do you know how to cook ?” she asked again.

This time Clover shook her head in reply. She mostly survived on bread for her entire life. She does not know much about cooking a meal.

Reyna's smile widened at that and she said like a mother she was,“Come sit here at the table. Let me make some Maggie for you.”

“No it's okay,” Clover tried to stop her, seeing she was already holding Ahren on her hips.

“Arey it's not a big deal I can do almost every work with him clinging to me like a little monkey,” with that she was already taking out the Maggie packets.

“I can take him….” Clover offered.

Reyna looked down at her baby.

He gave a shy smile to his aunt Clover as he drank the milk from his mumma. Reyna smiled at her baby boy,“he is not going to leave me Clover , he isn't done with his food.”

Clover nodded in understanding and sat down on the chair, as she sat she winced lightly at the pain between her legs.

“Are you okay clover ?” Both Reyna and Clover looked towards the door. Zehra was standing there and was looking at Clover with concern.

Reyna too looked at Clover after seeing the concerned look on Zehra's face. She touched Clover's forehead and cheek and asked,“Do you have a fever?” Clover shook her head in negative and just sat there silently not wanting to brief them about her pain.

“You can share your problems with us you know,” it was Zehra who said as she took the Maggie packets from Reyna's hands. “Go and sit with Clover at the table. I am making Maggie for all of us.”

Reyna nodded with a smile, thankful to her as though she was used to it but working while carrying Ahren on her hips is not that easy as she says.

She took a seat on the left side of the clover and asked again,“Are you okay clover?”

“I am okay. Just lack of sleep makes me tired.”

The lie rolled out of Clover's mouth.

The two women nodded and Zehra said, adding Maggie in the boiling water,“Don’t worry about what happened this morning Clover. You are not alone, we both are with you and will always be with you.”

Clover smiled, being thankful for their support. For a second she thought of sharing what Izan does to her behind the closed door but a big part of her was scared of saying anything to anyone.

To divert the topic she asked them in a low voice,“Were we really about to leave this house?” They were older than her and more mature. She seeked their guidance, especially when it comes to some big decisions related to marriage.

Zehra's hands stopped working when she heard what Clover had asked.

Were they really brave enough to leave this house? Leave their husbands ?

“No we were not,” it was Reyna who answered, diluting the silence.

Her eyes trailed at nothing as the weight of her own words settled down on her chest and she let it out in one go,“Even if a woman wants it is not entirely in her hands to leave her husband's house Clover. The society we come from has never been fair to us women. No matter how progressive we become, no matter how modern we get, no matter how many big achievements we achieve, in the end it is always us women who have to sacrifice. Sacrifice for the family to which we were born, sacrifice for the family to which we were married to. We are such a sacrificing being Clover that we sacrifice our own home after marriage only to be told that it was never our home. Reading in books and social media is easy Clover but doing it is very hard. It is very hard for us women to break free from a marriage especially if the marriage is bound by a child,” she said looking down at the baby sleeping by resting his head on her chest.

“For the better future of their children a lot of women have sacrificed their happiness, their peace, their self respect by being in an unhealthy marriage. Divorce is not easy especially for a woman like me who comes from a middle class background. After leaving Nirvana if I go back to my father's house they will shut the door right on my face. This thought alone is so painful but I know this is the only truth. Though I have a degree to get a job and take care of myself and my child but when as a mother I think of it I want nothing but best for my child and I know the best can be only given to him if he has a strong financial security which only his father can him at the moment..I am not in the condition to leave my six months old alone and go to work. The thought of leaving him for more than ten seconds leaves my heart shattering then how will I spend hours without him,” she cried and held her son closer to her heart, imagining him crying out his throat out at her absence.

“It is not only the story of middle class woman Reyna. The story is the same for almost every woman who wants to be free but has never taught to be free,” Zehra said, her own story. Her own pain and in that pain her own sacrifice.

“As a daughter I was never taught to be free. I was never told that I am important. I am the daughter of the father who wanted a son..it's not like he hates me but I know that he will never love me the way he would have loved me if I was a boy. It's too painful Clover to be not loved and cherished because you are a girl. When these feelings come, even a house of diamond looks nothing. Now breaking this marriage and bringing shame to my father's name, who is one of the most reputed people of the country, scares me of being the object of hatred for my father.  I have secretly yearned for love all my life but not anymore. I only want peace from my father's side and for that if I have to stay in this marriage then I will. I will do anything to give him peace at his old age. Again sacrificing like every other woman but my conscience will not allow me to do otherwise.”

“As I said sacrifice is deep rooted in our system,” Reyna spoke chuckling humorlessly at the end of Zehra's words.

After that they sat there in silence. All three of them thinking about their life, with all the what if, buts, yes and no.

Suddenly a smell caught Reyna's nostrils and she asked,“Is something burning ? ”

The three women's eyes widened at the realization and all of them turned to look at the pan which had turned black like a coal with no sign of Maggie.

Zehra grimaced at the sight of the Maggie she was cooking which was no more.

Slowly she looked back at the other two women sheepishly and said,“Marigold biscuits will be a good midnight snacks I guess.”

The other two women looked dead in her eyes with distaste before bubbling out into giggles, Zehra too joined them.

Among all the physical, mental and emotional pain the sound of sweet giggles looked beautiful.

♡✿♡✿♡⁠✿⁠♡⁠✿♡

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