If you made the cover on the side, please tell me because I lost your name and I want to dedicate this to you!

By the way, check out the song in the sidebar because it related to Peyton and Jace's situation :)

IMPORTANT:

 PLEASE stop begging me to upload because it makes each chapter rushed and I end up writing instead of doing school work. I'm actually failing some classes already :( I'll upload, I promise! It just might be awhile because I'm busy with school, soccer, babysitting, AND keeping up relationship with friends/family.

Thanks SO much for reading, I promise I'll get to weekly uploads soon! :)

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My hood was on and my ipod blasted into my ears as I walked the final stretch to school. While everyone was driving, I got up extra early to beat Jace from taking me. If I was going to do this then the last thing I needed was more moments with him or anyone for that matter.

            Today I wore the things that would make me blend in the most meaning some sweats, a dark blue sweatshirt, and some tennis shoes. My hair was in a ponytail and very little makeup was on my face. People were not on my agenda because I was going to do anything and everything to stay out of the spotlight of even one person.

            As I started becoming closer to the school where people would actually glance at me, I bit my lip and pulled my hood closer to my face. I’m done with ruining people’s lives from my stupidity so now I’m just secluding myself until I graduate and I can move far away.

            I think I’ll get a cat for company.

            Or six.

            As I made my way to the doors that led into the school, my eyes rested on Jace’s because he was staring right at me. Instead of pursuing me like I halfway expected, his eyes flitted over mine and continued walking. He didn’t recognize me…

            I breathed out a sigh of relief and went to my locker to pull out the books that I need for today. As soon as I pulled them out, a hand slammed on my locker and the loud clash of it being closed echoed through the hall. I gently pushed some of my red hair behind my ear and turned around to see the eager smirk of Kayla.

            “So, how horrible is your life now?” She cackled to me but I didn’t let it get to me this time.

            With all the strength I could muster up, I walked by her without saying a word and went to my next class. Oh, I wished I could turn around to see her face fall when I just did that. It would’ve been amazing to see because I’m done with her shit. Plain done with everyone that I once had contact with before. Now the only time I would actually willingly talk to someone is during dance because I made a commitment to the team.

            My first class went by slowly. I had a table all to myself while everyone space themselves around me but never near. It’s almost as if I had some severely contagious disease from all the solitude I was getting.

            But second period was different because I had everyone that I’d usually talk to in that class.

            I got in only a minute after the first bell rang so I was among the few people in the classroom. As more and more people started showing up, I kept my head in my notebook pretending to be studying my notes.

            “Can I sit here?”

            Before I even looked up, I knew whom the voice belonged to. Jace stared back at me and I just shrugged. He took that as a yes and sat down while I felt the stares of everyone on our backs.

            Well, so far I’m not talking but I do have the attention on me… This plan isn’t working out so well.

            I know that Jace wanted to talk but any attempts he made would just be ignored by me. Even though he lied, manipulated, and hurt me, I didn’t want to hurt his life anymore by making it horrible like everyone else’s. I’m done with any attempts of getting through high school as a social person.

            By the time lunch came around, I went through the line and looked for a table to sit at—alone I should add—but came out cold when I realized that every seat was taken. With a little sigh, I walked outside and was met with the blistering fall wind that seemed to take us over now. Oh well. It doesn’t matter that I’ll be sitting outside. It’s not like anyone cares about my feelings or my story anyways. No, they don’t which is why they’d rather see me crying by myself than being how I am now.

            “Hey, do you mind if I sit with you?” I turned around to see Chase with his huge, glowing smile that never leaves his face.

            “Uh,” my voice crackled from not using it all day. “I don’t know if you’d want to—“

            “Nonsense! I’d always love to sit with you, Peyton! You’re funny, kind, beautiful, sweet—“

            “And a liar,” I raised an eyebrow at him and he just shrugged like it was no big deal.

            “So? We all do it.”

            “But not all of us lie about something huge like I did,” I sighed and ran my fingers through my fringe because the rest of my hair was put up. “Look, I know you’re trying to make me feel better but I’m done. I’m done with people, relationships, everything. I just can’t take it anymore. I can’t take ruining people’s lives.”

            “Come on, Peyton, you’re not ruining anyone’s—“

            “Let me make a list, shall I?” Dillon, Lauren, Jace, my parents, Jace’s family, Kayla, and everyone at this school!” With every name I said I put up one finger until I got to the last statement and I just threw my arms all around.

            “You haven’t ruined my life.”

            “Yet!” I yelled but then reminded myself to calm down. “Look, I know how this will end. You’ll just be another person against me and you’ll have to live with the consequences from being close to me. I’m saving you time by saying that you should just stay away. I’m nothing but horrible.”

            He drew a deep breath when he realized that he wasn’t getting anywhere with me so he grabbed his stuff and stood up. Before he left completely, I leaned down and gave me a peck on the cheek. I immediately turned red and looked up at him in surprise.

            “Just know this, Peyton. There are people out there that still care about you and don’t care what you messed up on.” With that statement, he walked away until he was out of sight.

            The rest of the day passed slowly. People became either confused by my solitude lifestyle or just ignored me. By the time dance came around, Chase’s words had echoed in my mind around a million times already. I got dressed quickly then ran out onto the field where the soccer players were already at and some of the dancers.

            With my head down, I sat on the turf field and started stretching myself out. As more and more people came, conversations grew louder but none were meant for me to be included in.

            Dance went easily. Instead of focusing on pair dances, we worked as a group. Slowly and easily we were learning all these dances for our huge bash that was coming up. Chase and my dance were almost done but I haven’t even started on my solo one. Whatever… I have had other things on my mind lately.

            After practice I went up to the locker room to get changed again for the long walk home. Once I was done, I pulled my back over my shoulder and went out the front door of the school.

            “Hey, Peyton! Have fun walking home!” I heard someone shout to me. I looked up to see Lindsay, Jace, Kayla, and a few others from the soccer team. My brother was walking to his car but I even saw him turn around for a brief second.

            Just ignore them, Peyton… They want to make you cry.

            I started walking again but heard the scuffling of feet before a hand grabbed my arm. Kayla started dragging me toward the others who looked like they were going to burst out laughing any second except for Jace.

             “Doesn’t she just look so pathetic, everyone? No makeup, her hair is horrible, her clothes are gross… She’s given up on life!”

            They all started laughing while I stared at Jace. My eyes dug into them with a hatred that I never knew was possible.

            Tell the truth. Let everyone know that I’m not the one to blame here.

            “Aren’t I right, Jace?” Kayla went on to ask him. “After all, you’re the one who was hurt most by all her lies.”

            I turned my body to look at Kayla. There was a smirk on her face as she looked at her ex-boyfriend but there was also something in her eyes that told me that she wasn’t done using him as her own little monkey. She raised her eyebrow because she was still paying him and wanted this charade to continue on longer.

            I turned back to him to find that he was also staring back at me with a glint in his eyes. Was he going to tell the truth? Was he actually going to make all this crap stop with only a few simple words?

            “Y-you’re right,” He choked out which made the hopeful look in my eyes disappear in a moment. “Completely pathetic.”

            I felt my lower lip tremble because Kayla got her wish: I was going to start crying at any moment.

            “I hate you,” I whispered to him before I jerked my arm out of Kayla’s grasp and ran away from them all, their laughter fading with every step.

            I sprinted back home and once I was inside, I went to the backyard and screamed. I collapsed onto the ground and screamed as the tears poured down my face. Kayla got her wish and I know she’d love to see me like this. The hurt from having no one trust or like me finally set in and with every thought about it would come a cry of pain and another twenty tears released.

            “Why,” I whispered as my fingers dug into the grass that my parents tried to keep perfect. There I go just ruining another thing.

            That’s all I do, ruin and hurt people. I can’t take this anymore. I thought I would be able to get through this by disappearing but that only makes Kayla happier when she hurts me. Suicide is too extreme, I can never imagine killing myself. Running away? I wouldn’t know where to go.

            I bit my lip and punched the ground. I just don’t know what to do.

            With a huge sigh, I gathered to my feet and started walking to the house until I noticed both Jace and Dillon staring at me with hurt, despaired looks on their faces.            

            “Peyton—“ Dillon spoke first but I stepped back.

            “G-go away,” I stuttered.

            Dillon looked down but Jace stayed frozen. “He wants to talk to you… After you two are done, I want to talk to you too, Pey.”

            I crossed my arms over my chest as I watched my brother exit into the house then I looked down, not wanting to look at Jace. I didn’t even notice that he had walked forward until he was a few feet in front of me. I took a step back and stared at him.

            “What do you want?” I hissed out.

            He seemed taken back by the hatred in my voice but didn’t comment on it. “I just want to say that I’m sorry—“

            “It’s too late for apologies. I hate you, Jace. I hate everyone now all because of what you did to me! But one thing is clear, the only person who I hate more than you is myself.”

            “I didn’t mean for it to go this far! I honestly thought you’d just be sad and no one—until I explained—and no one else would find out!”

            “Well they did and I’m the one being bitten in the ass for it, not you.”

            “I didn’t come here to fight—“

            “No, you came here to watch me cry just like I’ve done a million times in these past few days.”

            He ran a hand through his brown hair and sighed. “I honestly care about you, Peyton. This deal with Kayla has to be the worst decision of my life and if I could I would go back and make sure this all didn’t happen!”

            “If it hadn’t happened, Jace, then you wouldn’t have any money for college,” I tried wiping away some of the streaming mascara on my face but gave up. “Look. You’ll go off to some huge, fancy college while I’ll be here like this for years. Why don’t we just pretend that none of this ever happened? Treat me like you would if you were truly in Kayla’s pack.”

            “I can’t do that!”

            “Oh, why not? You’re already being two-faced to everyone in saying that you are. I’m done with lying so I won’t pretend to be someone who I’m not. You, on the other hand, are still living in that lie. Why don’t you just be a man and tell the truth to everyone? You used me way more than I used you.”

            “Peyton…”

            “No, let me continue. You won’t tell everyone because you’re a coward. You don’t want anyone knowing that you purposely planned to hurt me! Our so called ‘relationship’ was fake, yes, but I actually gained feelings for you in the end while you had planned to wound me since day one.”

            “I didn’t want to but I seriously need the money. If it were my choice I would end this whole thing right now but Kayla wants it to continue!”

            “So you’re Kayla’s little bitch then?"

            He was silent for a moment probably letting my harsh—but truth—words sink in. “Yeah…” He finally muttered. “I guess you’re right.”

            I had to resist the urge to roll my eyes. “Good, now leave my property before I call the police.”

            “I didn’t come here without a reason, Peyton. I care about you and I want to put this behind us. I promise that this will all just go away if we act like friends again.”          

            “That’s the thing, Jace. I can’t pretend like we’re just friends because in reality, it’s much, much more than that and both you and I know it. If we act like nothing happened then it’s just another huge lie that we’re bringing ourselves into.”

            “Then how can I get you to be my friend again?”

            I looked up and met his light eyes that matched perfectly with his skin and hair tone. Instead of the happiness that I was used to, they held pain. A pain that’s not even close to the one inside of me. “Make a time machine because right now, there is nothing you can do that will make me forgive you completely.”

            I turned to walk to the door but his hand grabbed my arm. “Peyton, please!”

            “Stop it!” I screamed. “I hate you, just get away from me!” I sprinted into the house and locked the door behind me so he couldn’t get in. The tears that I’ve been containing since our little talk started finally released themselves as I collapsed onto my bed.

            I can’t forgive Jace. What he did was too horrible and can’t be fixed with just a couple of words.

            I heard the door of my room open and I sat up to yell at Jace but I was surprised to see Dillon standing there. Wordlessly, he walked over to my bed and opened his arms, wanting a hug.

            I wiped my nose on my sleeve and just stared at him. “What are you doing?” I whispered.

            “Being a brother.”

            “You haven’t been acting like one for the past week.”

            He looked down and lowered his arms. “I know and I’m sorry. Today when I saw you breaking down out in the backyard, I realized that you just made a mistake and I should be on your side. You’re only a teenager, you’re still learning and I should’ve known that.”

            I crossed my arms over my chest and sniffed. “That’s not going to make anything better, Dillon.”

            He sighed, “I know but if you need a hug, you know where I am.”

            My only sibling smiled at me and walked out of the room while I just sat there, not knowing what to do. I heard the slamming of a door so I looked out my window to see Jace in his car. Before he took off though, he just sat there then suddenly slammed his fist against his steering wheel repeatedly then held his face in his hands.

            He finally lifted his head after a moment of doing nothing and his eyes met mine in the window then he mouthed something. ‘Please.’

            I jumped away from the window and pressed my hand to my mouth the muffle the sobs that were coming out again.

            Before I realized what I was doing, I left my room and charged into Dillon’s. He immediately knew what was going on so he opened his arms and I walked into them. He didn’t say anything and only let himself comfort me as my tears stained his shirt. 

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QUICK! For the Dance-Bash I need songs for them to dance to so give me the best, dancy songs you can think of and they might be featured in this! :)