Meredith Black

After the most chaotic and terrifying 24 hours of my life, Atlas and Elio are home safe. They had never gotten off of the Hogwarts Express so I immediately alerted the Order and sent a Patronus to Regulus. He showed up within five minutes.

We didn't talk about anything other than finding the boys the whole time and we didn't sleep the whole night while searching for them.

I was flooded with relief when we got a Patronus from Fleur. Jack watched Cassie for a few hours while Regulus and I deal with everything.

Neither of the boys wants to talk about what happened yet, but judging by the state of them they will need someone to talk to in the morning. But for tonight Regulus and I let them do to bed after asking them if they were okay so many times that they got irritated.

Now, the boys and Cassie are asleep and Regulus and I are left in awkward silence.

"Are you leaving again?" I ask Regulus, closing the bedroom door.

He's standing by the dresser and is in the middle of finding pajamas to wear. "No," He shakes his head. "I'm not leaving again. Ever."

"Don't make promises you can't keep," I say.

The air is tense around us and there's so much space between us.

"I'm sorry," Regulus says. "I'm so sorry."

"Did you at least find what you were looking for?" I ask.

Regulus stares at me. "Yes," He answers. "I found one of the Horcruxes and destroyed it."

"Do you want to keep looking for them?" I ask.

Regulus barely lets me finish speaking before he answers. "No, I'm done looking. I just want to be here with you, with the kids."

"You left me, you left the kids," I remind him.

"I came back," Regulus says.

"You shouldn't have left in the first place," I say.

Regulus takes a couple of steps closer to me. There's still a few feet of space between us but not enough space. "I'm so sorry, Meredith. I'm sorry for leaving again," Regulus says. "But I came back, just like I promised." He searches my eyes frantically. "Can't that be enough?"

I pinch the bridge of my nose and have an internal fight between my head and my heart. On one hand, he shouldn't have left again, he shouldn't have left our kids to go on a possible suicide mission. On the other hand, he did come back. He came back and I still love him. He is my husband and I will always love him.

"I am so infuriated with you, I don't even know where to start," I say exasperatedly.

Regulus takes a step toward me. "I know," He says. "Be mad at me. Yell at me, tell me you hate me, that you hate what I did. I can take it."

"You are just so-," I struggle to find the words so I grab Regulus's face and smash my lips against his.

He meets me halfway and is quick to hold me. My hands are fisted in his shirt, wanting more, and more, and more.

"You're an idiot," I mumble against his lips.

"I know," Regulus says.

We kiss again and it's biting. It's angry. I kiss him hard and he reciprocates it. Regulus tugs at my bottom lip and holds me flush against him. I kiss him until I start running out of breath and all of my anger starts to dissolve and get pushed to the back of my mind.

I run out of fight. We're running out of time and I don't want to spend it being angry with him.

We go from tugging at clothes and hair to brushes of our lips. Regulus's lips brush against mine and we're out of energy, we're out of time, so we just stand there holding each other. Regulus's hand cards through my hair and our foreheads are pressed together.

"I don't want to be angry with you," I admit.

"I won't blame you. You have every right to be," Regulus says.

I nod and look up at him. "Can we not do this tonight? Can we just go to bed and be together and pretend like everything is okay?"

"Of course," Regulus agrees. "Whatever you want, Meredith."

I brush my fingers over his cheekbone which has a fresh scar that he must have acquired while hunting Horcruxes.

"I'll tell you all about it tomorrow," Regulus says.

I nod in response and when his arms wrap around me, I go right into his arms and hug him tightly.

"I love you," Regulus murmurs.

"I love you too," I mumble against his shoulder.

- - - - -

April 16th, 1998

Atlas and Elio are returning to Hogwarts on Saturday, much to Regulus and my disapproval. The boys insisted on returning solely based on the logic that they were taken from the train and not Hogwarts itself. It wasn't very encouraging, but after a few days of going back and forth, Regulus and I ultimately decided to let them finish out the school year at Hogwarts, only on the condition that we could pull them out at any time.

It's been a rough several of days for everyone.

Atlas is trying to deal with the fact that he was put under the Imperius Curse and forced to torture his own brother against his will. Elio is trying to deal with the fact that his brother used the Cruciatus Curse on him, even though it was against his will. He says he doesn't blame Atlas at all, but I don't think he's going to get over this for a long time.

Things with Regulus are strained. He's here, at home, and he's back in our bed, but part of me feels like he's just going to up and leave again. I'm trying to forgive him, but it's going to take time.

Regulus is trying too.

He's made an effort to make up for lost time with the kids. He's gone back to cooking every single meal. He brought me flowers and apologizes over and over again.

I so desperately want things to go back to the way that they used to be. Before Voldemort returned, before Sirius and Emmeline were killed, before Regulus left, again, and before my sons were kidnapped and tortured.

Everything feels extremely heavy right now like it's threatening to collapse and take all of us with it. But, despite all of this, there is some good remaining.

"Oh, he is so cute," I say, peering down at the newborn bundled up in Tonk's arms.

"Here, you can hold him," She replies. Tonks carefully passes her son over to me and I told him tightly and smile as he stretches.

Regulus looks over my shoulder and extends his hand to the baby. "Hi, Teddy," He says softly. Teddy grabs Regulus's finger and settles in my arms.

"It's good to see you, Regulus," Remus says, a small smile on his face.

"It's good to be back," Regulus replies, faltering slightly.

We all move to the living room and sit down on the couch and armchairs. I hold Teddy for a while until I hand him over to Regulus.

"I feel bad that you came to visit us," I say, "You just had a baby."

"Almost two weeks ago," Tonks says. "I'm just glad to be out of the house."

Remus nods, "Me too. Plus it's not like you two could leave the kids." He glances fondly at his son then back over at me. "How are they doing?"

"Better, they're talking to us and eating, and going about life normally," I answer. "But what happened is going to stay with them, and it's going to take both of them a while to process everything."

"Nothing that happened was either of your faults," Remus says, saying exactly what I need to hear. "You're both good parents, and what happened was out of your control. Being there for them now is the best thing you can do."

Regulus looks at Remus, his posture slightly tense.

"It's not your fault," Remus repeats to Regulus.

Regulus relaxes slightly, seeming to take Remus's word for it. I've been feeling so guilty about what happened, like I've failed as a parent, and so has Regulus.

All of us are silent for a moment before Tonks shifts the mood to a happier conversation.

"Remus and I had something we wanted to ask the both of you," Tonks says.

Regulus and I exchange a glance before looking back at the new parents sitting across from us.

"Will you two be Teddy's godparents?" Remus asks. "We trust you more than anybody, and know that you would take good care of him if anything were to happen."

"Of course," I answer.

A smile tugs at the corner of Regulus's lips and he tries to hide it. "Yes, we'll be Teddy's godparents," He says. 

- - - - - 

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