May 4th, 1979

The month of May brought slightly warmer weather and some sunshine. However, it also brought up a lot of unresolved issues.

Three days ago there had been an article in the Daily Prophet about a recent attack. This time, they wiped out a whole family, a pregnant woman, and children included. The Dark Mark had been cast over the house, and the word 'Mudblood' had been carved into their arms.

It actually made me sick to my stomach when reading it.

It also made me wonder. Wonder if Regulus had known about it, or if he had taken a part in any of the other attacks. I had never asked, and he had never told me. And for the past three days it has been eating me alive.

That's why I followed after him when History of Magic ended.

"Black!" I called.

Regulus turned around and looked at me. "Meredith," He said, "Can I help you with something?"

I fell into step beside him, our shoulders bumping together.

"I want to talk to you," I admitted.

Regulus smiled, "I'm listening."

"No, I mean I want to talk to you privately. It's about something important," I continued.

"Okay," Regulus nodded. "I can meet you in the Astronomy Tower tonight. Does that work?"

I nodded, "Yes, perfect. See you at midnight."

I turned around and started to walk off when he called after me.

"Meredith-," He said, "What's this about?"

I glanced down at his left forearm, then back up at Regulus.

He nodded in understanding.

"See you later," Regulus spoke.

- - - - -

When I got to the Astronomy Tower, Regulus was already there. He was leaning against the railing, staring up at the sky. He was probably looking at Sirius.

He turned around when he heard the door close, and watched me as I walked over and leaned against the railing beside him.

"I need to know everything," I said.

Regulus stared at me. "Everything?"

I nodded, "Yes, and I want you to start at the beginning. I want you to start with why."

Regulus looked away from me and stared straight out. "Okay, I can do that."

I stared over at Regulus, waiting for him to start explaining everything.

"It started when Sirius left," He began. "He was supposed to be the heir, I was just my parent's spare. So when he got disowned, all of that fell onto me. My mother, my cousin's, the whole lot of them-, they wanted me to be better. To be more involved."

I stole a glance at him.

"I never supported my mother's views, I think it's all ridiculous. I knew that she was a part of His group, that all of my family was. They made me sit in on meetings, I didn't know that I was going to be a part of it until an hour before I got the Mark. She came into my room and told me that I was going to be Marked, that it was an honor, and that I was going to make the whole family proud. I said no, she yelled, I refused, she threw curses at me until I stopped saying no. I got the Mark in June, the day after my seventeenth birthday."

My attention was fully on Regulus now. He was still looking straight ahead, his eyes glassed over as he told me what I had asked for.

"Have you killed anyone?" I asked, my voice quiet.

"No," Regulus answered. "That's part of the reason why I got a beating over Easter. That's why I showed up at your house."

"I thought it was because you didn't want to get engaged?" I questioned.

"Yes, that was part of the reason. But that's not what set my mother off," Regulus explained. "Narcissa and Bella's husbands made me go on an attack with them. It was a failed attack because I refused to kill anyone. I couldn't kill him. He was someone's husband, someone's father." Regulus exhaled shakily. "I didn't kill him, so Lucius and Rodolphus dragged me home and let my mother have a field day with me."

My eyes fell on the small scar above his brow bone. He had been beaten so badly when he showed up on my porch.

"What have you done then?" I asked. "Have you hurt anyone?"

Regulus sighed. "Not a person. But they made me-, uh, they made me use the Unforgivables on a duck over Christmas. It was awful, I passed out."

And now, for the million dollar question.

"Reg, do you want out?"

His entire body tensed up at my question, and he looked over at me.

"Do you want to get away from them?"

Regulus smiled sadly, "I'm trying, princess. I'm really trying."

"What-"

"I want out, but that's not going to happen. They'll kill me before they let me leave."

I frowned, "But you said that you're trying? They'll kill you, won't they?"

"Probably, but I would rather die trying than spend a lifetime playing the role that they want me to."

"But I can help you. I can save you," I said.

Regulus shook his head. "I'm afraid you can't save me, love."

"We can come up with a plan-"

"I have a plan, I just can't get you involved."

"Can't or won't?" I questioned, my tone harsh.

Our voices were raised, our words coming out harsher than they had been. We were standing so close that our noses were inches from touching. I wanted to make him understand. I wanted him to let me help him.

"Won't," Regulus replied. "This is something that I refuse to get you involved with."

"Why?" I asked.

"You know why."

"No," I said, "I don't."

Regulus stepped away from me, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his palms. He was pacing across the tower a few feet away from me.

"You can't protect me from everything. This is war, Regulus!"

He dropped his hands to his sides. "No, I can't. But I can sure as hell try. I am not involving you in this, Meredith," Regulus yelled.

"This is ridiculous! I'm offering you my help, and you're refusing for what? So you can protect me? I don't need to be protected!"

"I know, trust me, I know."

I yelled, "Then tell me why? Why won't you let me help?"

"Because I love you, okay?" Regulus yelled. "I love you, and I will not willingly let you get into harm's way."

I went silent. I just stopped. My heart was pounding in my chest, my brain working overtime to try to process what Regulus had just said.

He loves me?

"You love me?" I asked.

Regulus's face softened as he stepped closer to me.

"I love you, and that is why I am refusing your help," Regulus replied. "You can't save me, Meredith."

I stared up at him, frantically searching his eyes. "Just let me try, please?"

"Meredith-"

"Let me try."

Regulus didn't say anything. He just pressed a kiss onto my forehead, his hands cupping either side of my face. I looked up at him, trying to interpret what he was feeling. Regulus looked down at my lips, then back up at me.

I brought my face closer to his, brushing my lips against his.

He kissed me properly, his thumb brushing across my cheek as I rested my hands on his waist.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

But I didn't tell him that. I just kept on kissing him underneath the starry sky.