SAIL AWAY

Kaz was completely anxious, wanting more than anything to resolve the next few parts of his plan.

With Heleen dead and the ex-Menagerie workers helping Inej's crew, there were people growing impatient for Inej to leave once more, so she had to send her second-in-command, Deepika, back there every day for the next two days after Heleen's death to calm everybody down and warn that there was more work for the Wraith to deal with. There had been some trouble, of course, because there was no way impatient people could calmly live their lives for a few more days – Inej had to do a great sacrifice then; Deepika was sent to the ship as the Second-In-Command in complete control for the next voyage. The girls were being sent back to their home while Inej was kept, once more, away from hers; the sea.

"It might be a good thing," Deepika had said, calming the worried Inej down as she made sure to tell Deepika everything she could do to make the crew listen to her. "I'll end up learning everything that you tried to teach me and I just couldn't get it until I had my hands on the work itself. Besides, people might think you left with us if you're careful enough, nobody will see you coming."

"They never do," Kaz said, nodding in appreciation for Deepika's words on Inej's feelings.

Inej smiled at Kaz before kissing Deepika with a chaste kiss, a sweet goodbye kiss. They kept their eyes closed for one more moment after they pulled away, but Inej couldn't help but notice that Kaz had his back turned on them and was rowing silently, wishing to give them some privacy as he made his way into the more unused canals.

"Saintspeed, my light," said Inej. "Guide them home."

Kaz almost smiled once more. Deepika meant light, he knew that much with the very poor Suli he had gathered after living with Inej for a while.

"The Saints will lead me back to you, don't worry," Deepika insisted.

Years before that one, perhaps he would look at Inej and want her for himself; she was sweet and careful and eager, her ambitious was one of the most attractive traits in her, but he couldn't help but think that she wouldn't be able to grow as much as she had done without her boat and Deepika. Because of his respect for her, he didn't say anything as she sniffled all the way back to the mansion.

Four days after the Heleen's death, Deepika sailed away.

Kaz opened the door with the key and walked in with Inej was right behind him.

Jesper was laughing and holding Jordan on his arms as Wylan was standing beside him, all of them near the stairs.

"Hi," said Inej, hoarsely.

Wylan turned to look at her straight away, eyes widening with her watery voice and her red eyes. Jesper had to change Jordan from sitting on his right arm to his left so he could see Inej, but his eyes were also worried.

"How are you feeling, sweet?" Wylan asked.

"Fine and I don't want to talk about it," Inej dismissed, trying to forget what she had to go through. "What are we doing in the stairs, anyways?"

"We're waiting for Mama, Auntie," explained Jordan. "Are you alright? Do you want a hug? I like hugging when I cry."

Inej almost started crying once more, but ended up holding it back and smiling, nodding at Jordan and going to Jesper, getting Jordan from him and holding her tight. Kaz stood on the mudroom, not really moving further into the house.

"Why waiting for Laura? You know she can't go out," Kaz said.

"We're not going out," Wylan said, trying to get Jesper's attention away from Inej. "We were cleaning the house because – "

"I was bored," Jordan said.

"Because Jordan had a lot of energy, so we decided to use it to our favour," explained Wylan, smiling at Jordan. "Jesper found something on the attic and he brought it down because he didn't know what it was, but Laura did. Shu clothing. My father got it last time he went to Shu-Han for his wife."

Kaz almost choked, remembering very suddenly the last time he had seen Laura in Shu clothing. He was thirteen and she had dressed in those odd fabrics to go on a party with Per Haskell; he had seen her just for five minutes while Pim was explaining what she had to do and he was on the stairs, watching her. He had thought her to be beautiful with her hair in a plaid and the white clothes.

But now, listening to Laura getting closer to the stairs, he held his breath.

Laura had her hair up this time, pulled back and up in a tight bun and was wearing beautiful clothes that almost made Kaz dizzy. The clothes were different from the one he had seen her before, it was tighter around the shoulders and fitting around her body, thought not too tight. The familiar four flaps were sewn into two flaps and there was a collar around her neck. The fabric was red with a few silver details around the collar and the end of the flaps. Under that, she was using something looking like trousers in black.

"And that's how you use it," she said, smiling at Wylan. "Hi, Inej. Hey, Kaz."

"Hi," he said. He looked around several times, finally understanding something was missing.

"Nina and Matthias as having some alone grown-up time, Mama and Philip are taking a walk on the docks with Pim to buy some things," Laura explained once she noticed him looking around. He looked back at her, who was smiling as if she knew why he wasn't looking at her for too long. "What do you think?"

Jesper and Wylan turned to look at him.

"You..." he nodded, not finding words. "You look good. It's different from the other one you wore."

"Yes, it is," she said. "This one is for a woman and a bit small for me, the other was for a girl and was too big for me."

"You look nice," he said, complimenting her again.

"Thank you," she said. "Wylan, why does your father have a wedding dress on his attic?"

Kaz this time actually choked, suddenly not able to breathe. She was wearing a wedding dress.

Jesper almost started laughing, but was trying his best not to laugh out loud, disguising it with coughing.

"Are you and Dada getting married?" Jordan asked.

Kaz thought he was about to pass out.

The last time she talked about something like that was to tell him that she had been promised to her cousin when she was a baby, but ran away before they could officially make their engagement public, which meant that she was still free and all that shitty explanation about religion that Kaz completely ignored out of boredom when he had just asked what the saint in red had meant in the code – it meant 'marriage', if anyone is wondering, because Laura wasn't, for sure, she just rambled on. He couldn't very much complain about it, she was new and keen to help and to talk about herself to make friends or whatever it was that she was trying to archive; if Kaz thought too much in it, he hoped she had gotten whatever it was that she was looking for.

"No," laughed Laura, completely calm. "Wylan's father had this dress and I put it on to see how it looked. Do I look good, baby?"

"Yes," said Jordan, very matter-of-factly.

"Thank you," laughed Laura.

"You do look absolutely stunning," Inej said, forcing herself to smile. She thought of Deepika wearing a wedding dress. Would she be the other person waiting for her at the end of the aisle? She tried not to cry again.

"Anyways, my father had it because it was a present," Wylan said. "He said he was going to get married the last time he was there for a visit and a friend got it for him. He didn't like the idea of his wife using it, so he hid it away, I'd guess."

"Your father is a wanker," Jesper said.

"Jes!" Inej scolded, glancing between Jordan and Jesper.

"It's alright," said Jordan. "Mama says worse things."

Everybody looked at Laura in surprise, this time even Kaz.

"Oh, does she?" Kaz said, raising his eyebrows at Laura though he was talking to Jordan. "Because when you were a baby and I was there, I said terrible words and she almost scolded me because of it."

"Well, Mama is always burning herself in the kitchen," explained Jordan.

Laura crossed her arms, quickly becoming defensive.

"Look, I'm a great runner and make very little noise with most things, but I don't deal well with pans," she quickly explained herself.

Inej finally laughed, understanding Laura completely.

The whole plan seemed to be falling in place when Kaz found the newest information in Katterdam: Pekka Rollins had been sighted on the edges of town with his wife and son. That led to Kaz's paranoia to grow more than ever before, and from that moment on Misses Hoult wasn't really allowed out anymore, nor was Philip or Jordan – if they couldn't protect themselves, they were allowed past the threshold.

Laura wasn't allowed out either, but that because she was the biggest target and Inej seemed to be spending most of her time with Laura, making her company and helping her with the very upset and bored Jordan, that had started to throw tantrums, and Philip was also becoming moody for not having much to do; they were grown in farms where they were allowed out to play, and now they were stuck inside a house, not even going to the garden.

Nina and Matthias were great with the kids when Laura and Inej were tired, much to their complete relief. Nina taught Jordan dances and songs, though she couldn't hold a tune in a bucket for her life, but Jordan seemed quite tuned; Matthias had managed to get their attention and burn their energy by teaching them simple Fjerdan for the next week or so.

Wylan had tried his best to deal with the kids and try to teach them music, but he didn't have the patience for the noise and lack of focus, so he gave up and simply played tag with them, trying his best not to knock anything down.

Jesper, however, didn't have the time to play with anyone at all. He spent most of the time in the Slat with Kaz, doing grocery shopping and passing messages along.

By the ninth day since Deepika had sailed away, Inej was called away from the house for the first time in a while and neither her, Jesper or Kaz came back before the early hours of the morning.

Laura was still awake, caressing Wylan's curls as he had finally fallen asleep on her thighs after hours trying to wait up for them, so she heard the small noise of the lock and the click of the door before the repetitive noise of Kaz's cane.

Inej was the first to appear, giving her a sheepish smile. Jesper appeared right behind her, holding back a scream and gasping loudly, hand going to his chest when he was scared with the small movement on the sofa in the dimly lit music room. Kaz appeared soon after, eyes directly meeting Laura's.

"Any trouble?" she asked in a whisper.

Inej shook her head, sitting on the chair near the piano and pulling her feet up again. Laura always thought it to be so cute; she looked like a bird, ready to jump and fly away from trouble.

"Why didn't you light up candles?" Kaz asked.

"I'm not fifteen anymore, I'm not scared of the dark," she answered. "And Wylan slept, so now I can't feel my legs," she added, blushing a bit.

"You gave me a fright," complained Jesper, walking towards her. "Why are you still awake? It's two bells in the morning."

"I was waiting for you," she said.

Jesper kissed the top of her head before holding Wylan and swiftly lifting him up from the sofa, not even waking him up as he said his goodnights and carrying Wylan away from the room, keen to fall in bed and fall asleep as well.

Inej moved as well, leaving the room in complete silence.

Kaz and Laura stayed alone.

"Come on, let's go to bed," he said.

"I can't," she said.

"We're back already and we're all fine, you can relax now, Laura," he said, rolling his eyes at her emotional reaction.

"It's not that," she said, glaring up at him as if he had insulted Misses Hoult in front of her. "I just need a minute for blood to go back to my leg."

Kaz sighed, going to sit beside her. His leg wasn't hurting a lot that day, but he certainly had strained it a lot with all the walking he had done that night.

"Jordan's asleep?" he asked, massaging his knee with his gloved hands and feeling the relief that usually came with it.

"Philip insisted on tucking her in," she answered trying to move her toes. "Where did you three go? Nobody told me anything, you all just disappeared. Well, not really, because you and Jesper have been gone for a few days now and Wylan can't stop worrying. The poor boy barely eats."

"And you don't worry?" he teased.

She rolled her eyes, not thinking it was time for jokes, but knowing that it was Kaz's way of asking if she cared for him.

"Of course," she answered. "Don't you remember? I love you. I just... know. I'm sure I'd know if something happened to you. And I know that it's easier to drag the devil from hell than to kill you, Kaz Brekker, the Bastard of the Barrel, the Dirtyhands with no morals and no fears."

Kaz almost smiled.

"I love you," he whispered back. Part of him cringed at the words.

After three years of having a child with Laura and having her support for more than that, he though he'd feel much more open about his feelings, but saying those three words was hard of him.

"Now, where were you?" she asked again.

He had hoped she had forgotten about it.

"Pekka Rollins was seen entering the city," he explained. "He got a hotel near the outskirts of town and I went to try and check if he was just passing through towards somewhere else with his family. He wouldn't be stupid enough to bring his wife and son here, knowing that'd know about it."

"And?"

"Apparently so, he has it for three days," he said. "In the fourth, he has a room on a ship for the Wandering Islands."

She looked at him, knowing very well what he was going to do.

"You're going to stop him from getting into the ship," she guessed.

"Yes," he said. "But I'm making sure his family does get in so he doesn't know what happened to them. Fear, I learned, Laura, is the most powerful thing over a man. He almost had me, making my biggest fear almost come true with Jordan slipping away. Is my turn to remember him that I made him beg before, and I'll make him beg again, but this time I won't heed him and he'll remember why people call me a monster under the monster's bed."

The preparation in three days was completely ridiculous.

Inej's knives were sharpened, Laura asked someone to get her a bow, but made the arrows herself, taking the time to teach Jordan and Philip how to do the same, Matthias got himself a axe (much to Jesper's delight, who threw several jokes about Matthias with an axe being a Fjerdan; he had been keeping those for an especial occasion that came much earlier than winter) and Wylan had taken several hours of the day making bombs and even asking Laura to try out a fire-arrow (that didn't work, but he did try).

Still, the second day was the hardest for Laura as she hugged Misses Holt tight, trying not to cry.

"Mama, you have to promise me you'll be careful," she was whispering on her shoulder. "Don't let anyone get too close to the house; shoot first, ask later. Get a guard dog as soon as you get there and don't let Philip go to school until someone sends you word."

"Until you send me word," Misses Holt corrected. Laura hesitated. "You need to survive, Laura, and you need to come back home. If not for me, you need to come back for Philip and you need to bring Jordan home."

"Mama, I –" she started.

"No, Laura, come home," she insisted. "And I don't understand why Jordan is not coming back with us."

"I explained it before," Laura sighed. "If somebody knows about her, which is very probable since there were doctors coming here and servants that maybe leaked the information. So all the servants are gone for now and you'll be sent away publicly so people think she went with you, that's why you're taking the rice sack."

"Bloody rice, very heavy that thing is," complained Misses Holt, making Laura smile. "And I'll have to clothe it and all, making it even heavier."

"The rice sack is lighter than Jordan," laughed Laura.

"Well, I like carrying Jordan, but I don't like carrying rice around. I don't even like rice!"

But she did was she was told to do, carrying the rice sack as if it was a sleeping toddler and dragged Philip with her as the boy tried his best not to cry in front of Laura or Kaz, both of the people he wanted to see him as a grown-up.

Still, they left in the carriage and waved as they disappeared down the streets.

"The neighbours saw it," Jesper said as he walked back in. "They were watching."

"Good," Kaz said.

From then on, the plans were even more heated.

Anika had gotten to the house through the tunnel the night before everything happened and was visibly upset.

"I want to fight too," she said, near to whining to Kaz, but that wasn't enough to get his sympathy. "Why can I fight? I'm great with a pistol and I throw a proper punch, you seem to have clean forgotten it."

"I didn't," he said, ignoring her complaints.

"Then why are you making me stay here in an empty house?" she asked.

"Because you're the only I trust to stay to care for my daughter," he explained. "Don't disappoint me."

"I'm not a babysitter!" she exclaimed. "Get one of the recruits to do it."

"Anika, this is an order and you will follow it because I pay you do the shit I tell you to," he said, turning to her and pointing the crow of the cane to her, almost touching her neck with it. "If you fuck this up, I'll kill you."

Anika glared at him, but didn't say anything else to him. She nodded once, agreeing that it was her duty to take care of Jordan, though she was clearly not happy about it. What she didn't understand was that Jordan was very much a target, not just the treasure in the hunt.