Over the next week, you meet every day with Tony, Steve, and Bucky. You meticulously review every piece of intel they have on Hydra. Most of it is outdated and of no use anymore, but you help to confirm what is good. It's been exhausting for you. You still don't sleep through the night, and you have at least two nightmares every night. You've been at this for the last eight hours and need to blow off some steam.

"I can't do this anymore today. I'm exhausted and I need a break for a while. Please?" You whine all the while giving Steve big puppy dog eyes. You still haven't lost your talent for manipulation.

"She's right, Buck. We need to give her a break. We can pick it back up tomorrow," Steve says, smiling back at you.

Tony looks up and gives you his usual unapproving smirk. "Seriously Jo, I thought super soldiers had better stamina?"

You turn and give him a death glare. " One, only friends get to call me Jo. You'll address me as Lieutenant. Two, I can go all night when it's with the right person. And you're not it Stark." You turn and walk out of the mission room. Tony and Steve watch as you walk out.

"Ouch, she told you Stark." Bucky says, laughing at Tony. "I would listen to her, she still has some anger issues. You don't want to piss her off, trust me."
"Lieutenant..I could definitely salute her." Tony says as a devilish grin crosses his face.

"Stark, I remind you that is still my little sister. If she doesn't kick your ass, I will." Bucky says flatly.

Steve shakes his head. "I'm going to get something to eat. Care to join me, Buck?" Steve shoots Tony a nasty look.

"Yeah, sure." They both leave Tony standing alone in the mission room.

All work and no play has made you very restless. You're confined to the compound, so your choices are limited. Maybe you'll get a work out in, you haven't done any training since they captured you. You make your way down to the training level. As you pass a door, you notice Barton in the shooting range. You stop and lean against the doorway watching as he changes out different arrow tips. He fires off a couple of arrows, testing his bow. He sets it down and makes some adjustments to it.

"Do you always play with your tip by yourself?" You say with a smooth voice.

Clint looks up, startled by his sudden visitor. "I didn't see you standing there." He says with a playful smile.

"Oh, don't mind me. I just like to watch sometimes. " you say, returning the smile.

"Would you like to give it a try?" He asks as he steps towards you with the bow in his hand.

"Your tips or the bow and arrow?" You take a few steps further into the room.

Clint clears his throat and looks down for a second. "Bow and arrow. I don't let someone play with the tip until at least the second date."

" I don't know, I.." You start to say, but Clint cuts you off.

"Here, I'll show you how. It's not that hard." He says as he walks back over to where he was standing.

"Hmm, not that hard. I don't know if that's something you want everyone to know." You stand next to him with a mischievous look in your eyes.

Clint lets out a low, slightly uncomfortable laugh. "Here, stand here, feet facing me. Legs slightly apart."

You turn and face Clint. He hands you the bow. "That's good, but here, let me help." He steps behind you, places a leg between yours, and lightly spreads your feet further apart.

"Ok, now take the bow in your left hand and bring your arm so there's a straight line from your shoulder out."

You hold the bow up but angled down just a hair. "Like this?" You ask coyly.

"Just up a little more. Here, right about here." He says as his arm slides down to yours to your wrist and helps position your arm. You can feel his chest against your back, his heart beating into your shoulder blade. You can feel him inhale your scent just a little. The corner of your mouth turns up in a slanted grin.

Clint grabs an arrow, places it in your hand, and positions it for you. He places his hand around yours, guiding your fingers. "Good, you have a nice grasp." He almost whispers in your ear.

"So I've been told." You say teasingly over your shoulder.

You can feel Clint's hand squeeze yours just a little tighter. "Now pull it back, set your site on the target, and release the string."

You do, and it's almost a perfect bullseye. "Not bad." He says as he looks at you. He lets go of your hand and walks back around you. "Here, try a couple on your own." He positions the quiver over your shoulder.

He takes a step back as you pull an arrow out. You take a long, slow breath in and let it out. You rapid-fire three arrows. All three of them hit the bullseye, almost on top of each other. You turn, hand the bow, and quiver back to Clint with a raised eyebrow.

"I just got played, didn't I?" He says as he takes the bow and quiver.

"I never said I didn't know how. That one's on you." As you start to walk past him, you stop and look at him over your shoulder. "Next time, you can play me."

As you walk out the door, you can hear Clint say. "Oh, I plan to."  

Your head starts to ache a little. "Oh no, you don't. You will not do this today." You say to yourself.

You decide to go see what kind of whisky Tony has stocked. Knowing him, it's only top shelf.
You take the elevator to the living quarters levels and get out on the living room floor. The doors open, and to your surprise, it's empty. You walk over behind the bar to look at the shelves.

As your eyes scan the bottles, they land on a bottle of The Glenlivet 21. "Nice choice, Tony. I knew you wouldn't disappoint." you say aloud as you take down the bottle and grab a glass. You walk around the bar and sit on a bar stool.

You pour yourself two fingers worth and swallow it one shot. You can't get drunk, but the flavor is still comforting for some reason. You pour another and toss it back just like the first. You revel in the warmth as it hits your chest. You tilt your head back and close your eyes as the sensation continues down into your stomach. You let the warmth spread through your body, muscles finally loosening from all the tension you've been holding on to.

"I thought I would find you here." You hear footsteps from across the room. You open your eyes and see Bucky. The tension returns to your body.

"I was just finishing. It's all yours." You say rather bluntly as you get up.

"Jo, don't go. Please stay." Bucky says with a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"I can't, Buck. I'm sorry." As you start to walk past him, he gently grabs your arm.

"Why have you been avoiding me the last few days?" He asks

"I don't know what you're talking about." You say as you try to pull your arm away.

"The only time you talk to me is when we're in the mission room. Even then it's so formal. Why Joey? Talk to me." He says as he pleads with his eyes.

"You don't want to do this right now, Bucky. Just let it go." You look straight ahead as you talk to Bucky, but you don't make eye contact.

"No, I think I do. What is going on, Jo?" He continues to hold your arm but not too forcefully.

You snap inside and turn around to look him in the eyes. "Do you really want to know why? Do you?"

Bucky looks at you, surprised by your sudden outburst. "Yeah, I do, Jo."

"I can't look at your face, Buck! Every time I do, I get flashes of memories of you leaving. I get so angry at you, and I don't know what to do with it!" You yell at him.

A look of hurt and shock spread across Bucky's face as he takes in your words. "Joey, why?"

"Why?" You yell at him, "Why!" You push him in the chest. "BECAUSE YOU LEFT ME! YOU LEFT ME TO DIE THERE!"

Bucky is now standing as you continue to shove him. "Jo" is all he can say.

You start pushing him harder as you scream at him. "You left me like a lamb to the slaughter."

You take a swing and punch Bucky on the chin. He stumbles back, caught off guard by the hit and your words. You continue to hit Bucky in the face but he doesn't fight back.

"You left me, Bucky! I know you didn't know who I was or that I was even alive. I know that, and I know I shouldn't hold that against you, but I do, and I can stop it." You've backed Bucky up against a wall as you kick and punch him with full force. " I don't want to hate you Bucky. I don't, but I do! I hate you for getting what I knew I never would. You got out. I wanted that for you, but I still resented you for getting it!

Bucky's face is bleeding along with your knuckles. "I'm angry. I deserve to be angry, but I don't want to be! I don't know what to do with it!"

You pause in your assault, Bucky uses that to push you back away from him. You stumble backwards and fall to the ground. Bucky rushes up, bear hugging you from behind as you try to get to your knees.

"I'm sorry Joey! I'll let you go, and you can continue to beat me but know that you can't hurt me anymore than my own guilt has. From the moment I realized you were alive, I've gone over and over in my mind what I could have done different. I honestly thought you were dead, and part of me wished I had died with you."

You chest continues to heave as you struggle against Bucky's metal arm, unable to escape it. "You promised Buck! You always promised, until the end of the line. You lied."

"Joey, I'm so sorry. If I could I would go back and never leave. I know I promised you, and it took me a while, but I found you. I know I can never make up for all that time. But I'll make you a new promise to never ever leave you again. I'll swear from this moment on no one will ever hurt you again. I understand if you can never forgive me, but I love you, Joey. I'll protect you until I take my last breath."

You've stopped struggling against Bucky's hold but your heart rate and breathing are still rapid.
"This is my own burden to carry. I know this is where I should cry  but I don't feel it, it's just not there. I believe you, Bucky, but I can't give you the reaction you need. I'm sorry."

Bucky's hold on you loosens. " I know Jo. I understand and this is enough for me."