Edited*****

Cursing the morning with swollen eyes from last night's grief. I roll in a husbandless bed, fresh waves of betrayal slicing through my groggy consciousness. Self-loathing threatens to chain me to this bed.

To hell with that, you get our ass up and over that douchbag!

I welcome the chuckle as Amber continues to give me reasons to get on with my life.

Rising from the comforting covers, determined not to be a wallowing spinster. I stomp the short distance my small bedroom allows. Cringing, as hinges attached to my flimsy wardrobe doors protest being opened.

"What the f.." Confusion consumes me, and I'm left gaping. Slotting conclusions like puzzle pieces and landing on the most likely. My irritation flares. All of Derek's clothes are gone. Bastard finished work early, moving his items before I got home last night.

Sneaky, cheating, arsehole, Amber curses, mirroring my feelings exactly.

Spreading my clothes out across the extra space, a heaved breath buries the wave of hurt. With effort, a smile emerges on my lips and puffing my chest. I decide to prefer the absence of Derek's fabrics.

One less encounter to have with the man I gave everything, only to have it thrown back in my face.

Good Girl, time to turn a new leaf. Amber encourages.

Despite a longing for comfortable, soothing attire, Leggings and a colorful tank top win the fight over sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt. Slipping runners on, I drag myself down the short hallway. Stomach growling, my eyes narrow at the empty contents of my small pantry, tasty options scarcely left available.

"Toast, it is Amber." I set to work in my inconsequentially sized kitchen.

Loving my two-bedroom cottage is easy shes an old soul nestled into the forest, positioned on the very outskirts of Cleardale. My backyard morphs into the vast expanse of the surrounding woodland; these four walls are my slice of paradise.

Looking out a vintage framed window, staring into the forest I adore, brings me peace, calming my frazzled heart.

Derek must have been pleased to leave, having always referred to my home as more of an ostracized shed. My frown quickly turns into a scowl as I remember how much he loathed living here.

His plans to renovate disappeared about a year ago. Sighing, I take a sip of my tea, concluding that it must have been when Sandy became more than just his office help.

Chewing on my jam-covered toast, I'm mesmerized by the dark brown barks of the massive several hundred-year-old trees surrounding my little abode.

Deep green foliage dances in the early morning wind beckoning me.

Let's take a walk today. Our head needs a good clear-out.

"It has been far too long since I was out there," I mumble back to Amber. It's nice talking back to her out loud. With no one else around, I can't be labeled crazy.

Then it's settled. Amber cheers merrily.

Grabbing my winter jacket and shutting the wooden front door behind me before twisting the old metal key to lock it tight.

A small path leads to the iron gate that rests on the front of my property.

It whines needing oil. Everything about my little palace is outdated but never mind, at least it's mine.

Out and onto the narrow village street. The fifteen-minute journey into Cleardales town center begins. Fresh, clean air cools my lungs as I make my way to work.

While setting a leisurely pace, I admire the picturesque little village I've lived in almost my entire life. Sneakers padding against cobblestone pathways, my jacket occasionally brushes against the stone walls of buildings from the 18th century. Appreciating the beauty of houses that tuck themselves into the hills.

The old colors of the aged village intensify against the natural shades of surrounding woodlands. Yet, I never seem to tire of its unique beauty.

My pleasant journey ends, and I pause. Bracing for the smell of sweat. Filling my lungs as much clean air as possible, I push the doors to the town's gym open.

The evaporated form of bodily fluid glides through my nose and into my lungs. Having always had a sensitive nose, it concludes it's not too bad this morning.

"Goodmorning, Stella!" Amy, the bleach blonde Barbie doll receptionist, greets me. Same as every other morning.

Grateful she's unaware my life got turned upside down last night. I smile back, putting a lot of effort into turning my lips upwards.

Word of my failed marriage will leak into this small community soon. Pretending normality until then feels like a solid plan.

We should be celebrating and parading the news that idiot left us, Amber grumbles. I ignore her.

"Morning Amy, how many do I have scheduled today?".

"You're full as always, still our most popular personal trainer," she relays, chirpy and full of her usual bubbly energy.

Giving enthusiasm back isn't an option today. Despite Amber jumping around for joy inside my head, I'm still recovering from my marriage ending less than 15 hours ago. Still, Amy's complement is appreciated, so I try to smile as warmly as possible.

People travel from across the country for my exceptional abilities to train them in self-defense. I always seem to forget my successful career. Derek's business always took the shine as he made more money than I.

Another reason to praise the lord he's gone! I roll my eyes at Amber's constant attempts to make me thankful Derek left.

Attempting not to wrinkle my nose at Amy's overuse of perfume, I lean closer to get a better look at my scheduled day. I groan, annoyed when I spot Daniel Turner first on my list for today. Amy notices my eyes landing on his name. Pointing to it with one of her delicately manicured fingernails and leaning even closer to me.

Wow, she really plastered herself with floral aromas today. Stifling a cough, I take a step back.

"He's already here, arrived 30 minutes early", she whispers, trying to smother a giggle.

Widening my eyes, a silent 'help me' look overtakes my face. Amy can't help the little snicker that escapes her glossy lips. Waving her goodbye, I head into the gyms further.

Unloading personal items into my locker doesn't take long enough. Before wanting to, I'm forced to amble my way over to a patient but over eager Daniel.

"Ok, Daniel, how are we feeling after last week's routine?" I move into my corner of the gym and ready some equipment for Daniels' session.

"It was great, Stell, but I was wondering if we could do some hands-on combat stuff? Like you do with your self-defense class?" He asks, too excited. I cringe, knowing exactly why he wants to do hand-to-hand combat with me. So he can cop a feel or two. Ew.

Facing Daniel, observing him differently from usual, well checking him out. Justifying it with the fact that I'm now a single woman.

Daniel is attractive, tall, with blonde hair, blue eyes, and a babyface. Continuing to admire my handy work. The training has left him solid and muscular-looking.

Hundreds of girls would line up for a hands-on session with him. It's a true shame I find him so irritating.

I sigh, "Sure, but I should warn you, I won't be going easy."

After the night I had, I'm ready to use some of the leftover anger that's still simmering away. He should be more worried about this; instead, Daniel laughs, oblivious, and sizes me up, convinced his plan is genuinely brilliant.

This is what we need, imagine he's Derek! Amber chuckles in the back of my head.

I smile, agreeing and launching myself at Daniel...

Feeling satisfied as I leave work. The memory of Daniels limping from evacuating the gym was most certainly the highlight of my day.

He was no match for us, Stella, you knew that...

"I know, but still, it was fun," I mumble.

I lock the gym door behind me and take my usual path home. I'm relieved to find Deraks accountancy empty with all lights off. Seeing the new happy couple together would have set me further off the edge.

Halfway home, and I can't stop the tears pouring down my cheeks, the sight of what was our home encased in darkness causes the first gut-wrenching sob to burst free.

He's truly gone, left me for another after every promise we made. I welcome the blackened hands of depression to take me. Ambers yelling about walks in the woods fade away as I push up a mental barrier between us and enter my home...

3 miserable weeks pass by, every bottle of liquor I owned has been consumed, and I have now resorted to watching one horror movie after another. It's tragic. I cannot watch the brief romantic scenes amongst the gore and trauma, fast-forwarding them while damming the world...

Weirdly I don't miss Derek. I'm past hurt and just angry at his lies.

If I am honest, my depression is more about being lost. My life was all planned out and heading in the specific direction I'd been raised and told it should.

Now everything has been uprooted, and I'm lost with what to do next.

As I leave work, a cool breeze whistles through my open jacket. Wrapping my arms around myself protectively. I squeeze tight, trying to keep myself together. Swallowing the same cool mountain air as I walk, wondering what the hell I am going to do with my life now.

Uh, oh, you got to be kidding me. Amber's alarmed tone causes me to search for danger.

What? I start to send, and then I spot her. Sandy.

Am I really that unobservant that my inner persona notices the things and people around me before I do?

Let's take a long way home. Amber encourages me away from the homewrecker emerging from Derek's office.

Just as I am about to turn and take another much longer and tedious direction home, she speaks.

"Stella?" Her tiny voice makes my hands tremble with anger.

"What?" I say as coldly as possible. She stutters, sensing my frostiness.

What did she expect me to congratulate her on stealing my life from under me?

"I am truly sorry for how this all turned out. We are, well Derek and I, we are just meant to be, you see. I never wanted you to get hurt." Her arms are waving around as she tries to apologize and ease her own guilt.

The laugh that bursts from me doesn't even sound like my own voice. I've lost it.

"You want my forgiveness, don't you? You want me to just roll over and play happy little lamb. Well, fuck you!" I scream, furious.

Suddenly I feel pressure in my head, and it feels like my skin is crawling.

Let me show her how to be sorry! Amber roars. I panic and shut a wall up between us. Instantly my skin stops crawling, and the pressure in my head is gone.

I pat myself down, touching my head and skin, wondering what the hell just happened. I look up, and I'm sure my eyes are wide with shock.

Sandy's face turns pale, and I see tears well up in her eyes. She turns, running from me.

I stay put glued to the spot, staring at her retreating form. Why couldn't I be a lamb and remain quiet? Tentatively I let the mental wall between Amber and me down, pleased to hear her at average volume this time.

Alright, enough is enough, Stella.

Yes, I know a walk, you think we should walk. Because a walk in the woods will fix what I should do with my boring life.

I can't watch one more lame movie while you drown us in liquid arsenic, she snaps. You never know. Maybe we will find our divine purpose once we taste the forest air.

Fine, let's try a damn walk then...