LOTUS

"Welcome home, Dra. Lee," nakangiting sambit ni Manang Esang, ang yaya ko mula noon. Sinalubong niya ako ng mahigpit na yakap pagkababa ko sa kotse.

"Manang," malambing kong sambit. "Na-miss po kita."

Exhausted after a grueling shift at the hospital, sa wakas ay nakauwi na rin ako sa mansyon. Gusto ko nang ihiga ang likod dahil medyo sumasasakit na ito.

"Na-miss ko rin naman ang baby doktora ko," ani Manang "O e teka sandali, ipaghahanda kita ng makakain. Mukhang pagod na pagod ka e. You must take care of yourself, hija. Hay naku! Kung nabubuhay ang Papang mo ay talagang

As I made my way through the grand foyer, I caught sight of my mother, Sandra, in the living room. Nakaupo siya sa sofa habang hawak ang photo album nila ni Papa, parati ko siyang nakikita na ginagawa 'yon magmula noong mawala ang Papa . I immediately embraced her.

"Welcome home, sweetheart," ani Mama. "How was your day?"

"Challenging, Mom," pag-amin ko. "...and exhausting."

Her hand cupped my cheek. "I'm incredibly proud of you, my Lotus. Your dedication shines through."

"Thank you, Mom."

"Magpahinga ka na anak, make sure you'll have a good rest. Huwag mo muna akong iwanan, huwag ka na munang sumama sa Papang mo." Ganito ang Mamang kapag nagpapalambing o 'di kaya naman ay nami-miss ako dahil sa wala siyang ibang kasama kung'di ang mga helpers namin.

"Doktora, kumain ka na muna bago ka magpahinga. Naghanda ako ng paborito mong corn soup," ani Manang Esang, kasunod niya ay si Ate Tentay na hinahalo namn ang milo sa paborito kong pink na mug. 

 After finishing my meal, pumanhik ako sa kwarto to took a half-bath and change my clothes. Pagkatapos ay bumaba na muli ako para magtungo sa library, my libro akong binabasa at tinatapos para mabasa ko pa ang iba pang libro na iniregalo sa akin ni Owen. Nestling into an armchair, I gazed out of the window at the serene garden beyond. With a deep breath, I leaned back in my chair.

Bata pa lang ako, nakahiligan ko na ang pagbabasa. Marami kasing libro na ipinamimigay noon mula sa mga donasyon ng mga foundation at NGO na nagpupunta sa orphanage kung saan ako naggaling.

Hindi naman taliwas sa akin ang pagiging ampon ko, I was seven when Papang and Mamang adopted me. Ten years old ako nang maintindihan ko kung ano ang tunay na kahulugan ng pagiging ampon but despite the reality; my adopted parents treat me with love and care. Hindi nila ako itinuring na iba.

Nagkaroon naman sila ng anak na lalaki matapos akong ampunin, si Aster Lyden na isang piloto. Nakatira siya ngayon sa New York, he's 29 at ayaw pa na mag-asawa. Inienjoy niya ang buhay binata kasama si Uncle Markus, nakababatang kapatid ng Papang na katulad  ni Aster ay binata rin at ayaw mag-asawa. Hindi ako super close sa dalawa, I'm more on my mother's side kung saan marami akong pininsan na lalaki.

Hindi ko namalayan na nakatulog pala ako while contemplating about my life, nagising na lang ako nang magvibrate ang phone sa bulsa ko. I glance on the analogue clock beside me before getting my phone. It was 4pm in the afternoon. Kahit papaano ay may anim na oras na tulog na ako mula nang umuwi.

"Hello? Who's this?" sambit ko nang sagutin ang tawag.

"Lotus, it's Vincent," sagot ng lalaki mula sa kabilang linya.

"What do you want?" pinahalata ko ang inis sa boses ko.

"I need to talk to you, Lotus. I-I've come to realize the mistakes I've made, the pain I've caused you... a-and I-I want to ask for your forgiveness."

I let out a sigh before answering."'Forgiveness, isn't something that can be given lightly. It takes time," mahinahong sambit ko.

"I understand, Lotus. I just want you to know that I truly am sorry for everything."

"Thank you for acknowledging that," I replied quietly.

"Lotus... kakapalan ko na ang mukha ko, p-puwede ba akong manghiram ng pera sa'yo, I have stage 2 liver cancer and I'm struggling financially, siguro naman narinig mo nang tinanggal ako ni Tito Anton sa university after what happened to us. Naibenta ko na ang lahat ng ari-arian na meron ako, pati 'yong bahay natin para makapag-abroad ang kapatid ko. Namatayan ako ng anak, Lotus, s-si Fuschia naman hindi na ako inuwian at sumama sa ibang lalaki. W-Wala na akong malapitan, p-pasensya ka na Lotus."

Closing my eyes briefly, I allowed myself a moment to absorb his request. The past was a complex web of emotions, and this unexpected call had unraveled a thread that was tightly wound.

Medyo makapal ang mukha niya sapagtawag na ginawa niya at mas lalong kumapal ito dahil sa panghihiram niya ng pera.

Hindi ako nakasagot agad, pinag-iisipan ko pa ang sasabihin. Wala sa bokabularyo ko ang magdamot pero ang katulad ni Vincent, hindi na dapat tinutulungan.

He left me in pain, tapos ngayon tatawag siya at manghihiram na para bang wala lang ang ginawa niya.

"To tell you frankly, wala akong pakielam sa kung ano man ang pinagdaraanan mo ngayon. Dalawang taon na akong walang asawa, Vincent. Putol na ang koneksyon natin, matapos mo akong lokohin at iwan. Sa tingin mo ba, magkakaamor pa ako na tulungan ka. In your dreams," bulalas ko at pagka ay ibinaba ko ang tawag.

I added his number on my blocklist, hindi ko alam kung saan niya nakuha ang number ko at wala akong pakielam kung ano man ang pinagdaraanan niya ngayon.

I'm not bitter, I'm just guarding my heart.

Vincent ruined my life, and that's all I know.

I sat back in my chair, my thoughts swirling. Gazing out of the window, as I closed the book in my hands, a sudden knock on the library door startled me.

Hindi naman naka-lock ang pinto kaya madali rin itong nabuksan, it's Ate Tentay.

"Dra. Lotus," wika niya, "nandito po si Dra Salvacion at Dra. Milagros ."

"Thank you, Ate Tentay. Please ask them to wait for a moment. I'll be there shortly."

Ate Tentay nodded and left, closing the door behind her. I set the book aside and took a moment to gather my thoughts before making my way to the living room. Nadatnan ko sina Vera at Stephanie na kausap ang Mamang sa sala habang umiinom ng juice.

"O nandito na pala ang hinihintay ninyo," wika ni Mama na unang nakapansin sa pagdating ko.

"You took forever!" iritableng saad ni Vera nang makita niya ako.

"Oo nga, kanina pa kami naghihintay." Nanigtaas din ang kilay ni Stephanie.

Sina Vera Salvacion at Stephanie Milagros ay kapwa mga doktor, kaklase ko sila sa med school. Neurosurgeon si Vera, pediatrician naman si Milagros.

"Anyway, we got plans," ani Vera nang tumayo sa sofa.

"Plans?" Naningkit ang mga mata ko.

Vera leaned forward, "We're going to a disco bar tonight."

I blinked in surprise. A disco bar was definitely not on my list of anticipated activities.

"Disco bar?"

"Absolutely! It's time to let loose and have some fun. You've been working tirelessly, Lotus. It's time for a break." Tumayo si Steph at sumayaw-sayaw

"Ma, tell them I'm not going," ismo bata kong sabi kay Mama.

"Pumayag na ako anak, tama naman si Stephanie. You've been working hard, deserve mo rin naman magliwaliw. Isa pa, you're already thirty-seven. Hindi ka na bata para pagbawalan ko pa."

The idea of a disco bar wasn't exactly my comfort zone, kahit noong bata pa ako. I wasn't a fun of parties. Perhaps it was time to step out of my usual routine.

"All right," I said with a laugh, giving in to their persuasion. "Let's do it."

"Yey!" sabay na sabi ng mga kaibigan ko.

"Give me some time, magbibihis lang ako."

Stephanie clapped her hands together. "Perfect! We'll wait for you right here."

Vera nodded in agreement. "Take your time, Lotus. We're in no rush," kumindat pa siya.

The idea of a disco bar was certainly unconventional for me, but there was something liberating about embracing the unexpected. Those two, Vera and Stephanie mga book worms ang mga 'yan noon. Wala silang time for parties at happy hour. Vera is a bread winner, nasa conservative household naman si Steph dahil nasa pangangalaga siya ng grandparents niya.

After a refreshing shower, I stood in front of my closet, pondering what to wear. Wala naman akong mga sexyng damit na tulad ng suot nila. Stephanie is in a snug blue halter dress, while Vera wears a glitzy knee-length glitter dress.

Opting for a deep blue assymetrical dress that was both stylish and comfortable, I took a moment to admire myself in the mirror. The dress accentuated my figure without being overly flashy-just the right balance for the place.

Hindi 'yon sexy na sexy pero komportable naman ako dahil tiyan lang naman ang nakalabas sa akin at hindi ang cleavage ko. Pinaresan ko ito ng silver na stiletto, nagsuot rin ako ng pearl na dangle earring at necklace. Taking one last look in the mirror, I smiled at my reflection staring back at me.

"Looking fabulous, Lotus!" puri ni Stephanie

"Absolutely stunning! Ready to hit the dance floor?" energetic naman na tanong ni Vera

"Yeah, tara na."

Stepping out of my comfort zone may not be bad, minsan lang naman kasi 'to.

Van ni Vera ang ginamit namin papunta sa bar, balak ko sana na magmaneho pero pinigilan ako ng dalawa kaya wala ba akong nagawa.

Arriving at the bar, the rhythm of muauc immediately enveloped us in a lively ambiance. We found a table, and Vera wasted no time in ordering a round of drinks-whiskey for her, a margarita for Stephanie, and a mocktail for me.

"Cheers!" sabay-sabay naming sigaw nang paguntugin namin ang mga hawak na baso.

"So, Lotus, any updates on the love front?" maintrigang tanong ni Vera.

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Same old story, Vera. I've been focused on my career. Alam mo namang career is life ako."

Stephanie raised an eyebrow, a teasing grin forming. "No secret admirers or mysterious strangers sweeping you off your feet?"

I chuckled, taking a sip of my mocktail. "Not lately. I guess I've been too immersed in my work to even notice."

"Ano ba Lotus? Life is more than just the hospital," ani Vera. "Look at us, ako nakakadalawang asawa na after my annulment. Si Stephanie, magsesettle down na next year. Hindi na tayo bumabata, ako nga may sixteen years old na. Binata na ang Zion ko."

"Agreed. There's a whole world out there waiting for you. You just need to grab it, e ang problema sa'yo. After your divorce, sinubsub mo na ang sarili mo sa trabaho."

"Huwah mo namang pagalitan, Steph. Who knows? Maybe tonight is the night you meet someone unexpected."

I chuckled, a mixture of skepticism and curiosity. "Unlikely, but I'll keep an open mind."

Vera suddenly nudged me with an amused grin. " Gaya no'n."

Curious akong sinundan ang tingin niya, napansin ko ang isang grupo ng mga lalaki sa hindi kalayuan, isa sa kanila ang nakaagaw ng atensyon ko-isang guwapong lalaki na nakasuot ng na asul na suit. Tila pasulyap-sulyap sila sa direksyon namin. That guy in blue suit suddenly stare at me, medyo matagal iyon. Ramdam ko ang pamumula ng pisngi ko habang umiiwas ako ng tingin.

"Nakita ko rin 'yon," natatawa niyang sabi. "Someone seems to be getting some attention."

"Come on, Vera. You're imagining things," inirapan ko na lang siya.

"Oh, please. Hindi na tayo bata, Queenie. That man in the blue suit practically turned his head when he saw you," mapang-asar siyang tumawa.

"It's probably just a coincidence," palusot ko.

Vera winked at me, clearly enjoying the moment. "Sure, Lotus. Coincidence. Just keep telling yourself that."

"She's right, Lotus. I haven't seen you blush like this since medical school," saad ni Stephanie.

I groaned, feeling my cheeks grow even warmer. "Can we change the topic, please?"

"Fine fine," natatawang sabi ni Vera.

"Someone is getting annoyed here, ikaw naman kasi V. Bigla mong hinat seat." Kikindat-kindat pa si Steph.

"Hello, ladies," isang guwapong lalaki na kulot ang buhok ang lumapit sa amin. Isa siya sa kasama ng lalaking naka-blue na suit. "Mind if I join you for a moment?"

Guwapo, amoy babaero.

Vera and Stephanie exchanged knowing glances.

"Of course, feel free," si Vera ang sumagot.

Tinitigan niya muna ako bago siya umupo sa tabi ko. "I couldn't help but notice you from across the bar. Kanina ka pa kasi tinititigan ng kaibigan ko, at gusto niya na itanong kung ano ang pangalan mo but he's shy."

Vera leaned in playfully. "Ah, the age-old tale of the wingman."

Stephanie's grin matched Vera's. "Looks like someone's trying to be the hero of the night."

"It's Lotus," sagot ko.

"Like a flower?" Pilyong ngumiti ang lalaki

"Yeah," mahiksing tugon ko.

I was name after the flower, lotus. It symbolizes beauty and purity in the Chinese tradition.

Harry extended his hand," "Harry Leighman. Nice to meet you, Lotus."

"Likewise, Harry." Tinanggap ko ang pakikipagkamay sa niya.

Vera and Stephanie exchanged amused glances, halata sa mga mata nila na nagugustuhan nila ang mga nangyayari.

"I'll pass your name along. Maybe he'll gather the courage to come over and introduce himself." Malanding kumindat si Harry bago umalis

"O.M.G! Mukhang madidiligan na ang friend natin!" Malapad na ngumiti si Vera.

"Yeah right!" pagsang-ayon ni Stephanie.

I rolled my eyes, "You two are incorrigible."

Stephanie linked her arm with mine, "We're just doing our part to add a little excitement to your boring life. Ano ka ba, Lotus? Ikaw na nga nagsabi e, You're already thirty-seven."

Sasagot sana ako ngunit bumalik ulit si Harry. Hila-hila ang lalaking naka blue suit.

"Hey, ladies, I'm back and I'd like you to meet my balik-bayan friend, Zephyr Pendleton,"

Zephyr offered a warm smile, "H-Hi?"

Vera and Stephanie exchanged intrigued glances before staring at Zephyr.

Pinaraanan ko rin naman siya ng tingin.

Imagine a man whose rugged handsomeness rivals that of a Greek god. His chiseled jawline could cut through stone, accentuating his masculine allure. His eyes, deep and mysterious like pools of molten chocolate, hold a captivating intensity that draws you in. With a smile that could melt even the iciest hearts, he exudes a magnetic charm that's impossible to resist. His hair, meticulously tousled yet effortlessly perfect, adds to his aura of casual elegance. Every step he takes seems to command attention, exuding confidence and a hint of playful charisma.

Every line of his face seems to have been meticulously sculpted by some divine hand, creating a visage that's almost otherworldly in its perfection.

Just a glimpse of him sets my heart racing, and I can't help but wonder if someone so breathtakingly handsome could truly exist outside the realm of dreams

Napalunok ako at saglit na nag-iwas ng tingin.

"So," tumikhim si Harry bago nagsimula. "Zephyr here couldn't stop talking about how he got dazzled by someone's beauty."

"Harry, you didn't have to share that part.o" Pinanlakihan ni Zephyr ng mata ang kaibigan.

"E kaso nasabi na, ituloy mo na," engganyo ni Vera na may pilyang ngiti.

"Alright, alright," natatawang sambit ni Zephyr. " Yes, I couldn't help but notice someone-someone whose beauty caught my attention," mahina niyang sambit habang nakatitig sa mga maya ko. "I-I was curious, and Harry here convinced me it was worth coming over."

Vera seized the moment, "Well, it seems like the mysterious beauty finally has a name." Tumayo siya at lumapit sa akin. "Allow me to introduce Lotus Queenie Lee, 37, a licensed physician, single and ready to mingle."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes, nakakahiya minsan maging kaibigan itong si Elvira.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Lotus. Your name is as unique and captivating as the intricate beauty of a lotus in a serene pond. Mind if I dive into a conversation with someone as enchanting as you?" He smile widely, extending his arm for a handshake.

"Whoah!" Vera and Steph yelled in unison.

"He learned from the expert," proud na sabi ni Harry na nakaturo sa sarili.

Naulanigan ko ang palakpakan ng tatlo pa nilang kaibigan mula sa kabilang mesa.

My heart quickened its pace as a warm flush crept up my cheeks. I stood there, lost in the moment, my words eluding me in his presence.

Bago sa pakiramdam ang makakilaka ulit ng isang tao... well bukod sa mga pasyente ko.

Tinanggap ko ang pakikipagkamay ni Zeohyr ngunit saglit lang dahil binitiwan ko rin.

My gaze lowered slightly, my fingers nervously tracing invisible patterns on the edge of my glass. The memory of past pain lingered in me, casting a shadow of hesitation.

Hindi ko alam kung handa na ba akong kumilala ulit ng bagong tao at papasukin siya sa buhay mo. The pain Vincent brought into my life was etched deeply, a reminder of the vulnerability I had once shown and the scars that remained long after.